This is a list of quotes from Johnny Bravo: James Blake’s a poof
- ”James Blake’s a poof”
- "Hey, Baby! Anybody ever tell you I have beautiful eyes?"
- "Yeah, whatever."
- "Enough about you, let's talk about me, Johnny Bravo."
- "I am Johnny Bravo, the one-man army!"
- "Wanna see me comb my hair, really fast?"
- "You look pretty...I look pretty...why don't we go home and stare at each other?"
- "Hey there smart momma, typin' recipes?"
- "I bet your name's Mickey, 'cause you're so fine. You're so fine you..."
- "But these letters! If Santa doesn't get these letters by tonight, I might not get all those free presents I asked for. And who ever heard of a Christmas without free stuff?"
- "Great Scott. My pizza-sense is tingling."
- "Do the Monkey with me"
- "Mmm. Frosted Sugar Bits. The great taste of frosted sugar in bits."
- "Sweet. Bring on the Danish chicks and cream soda."
- "Now remember, I do my best work when I'm being worshiped as a god."
- "Mama mia. That's a spicy meatball!."
- "Hey, Santa, it's me, Johnny. Remember I'm the one that beat you up last year 'cause I thought you were a burglar?"
- "But enough about me... Let's talk about me. What do you think of me?"
- "Hey! How come he gets a banana?"
- "Hey Foxy Mama, You smell kinda pretty. Wanna smell me? Hoohah!"
- "I am investigating the disappearance of all the cats in the city... my living room is full of cats... that means..." (pause) "I'm hungry!"
- "Pops? It's me, Johnny! I couldn't find any donuts so I brought some tile grout!"
- "You know, you'd think a person with that much hate in her heart wouldn't gravitate towards the service industry."
- "Dog... donkey... Well, they both start with the letter "N"..."
- "Check the pects. hoo ha hooah!"
- "Whoa! A castle in the sky! Just like in that fairy tale of Little Red Rumplestiltskin and the Three Bears and Gretel!"
- "Thank you, thank you very much."
- "Whaddaya mean? I got the hamster wheel and the hamster food dispenser. (looks in the mirror) Oh no! She's turnin' me into a beautiful butterfly!"
- "Mister, I don't think you realize who you're talking to. I'm Johnny Bravo, the one-man army!"
- "Wanna watch my chest hair move in slow motion?"
- "Man, I'm pretty."
- "Whoa, Mama!"
- "This won't end well." (whenever Johnny is about to take a beating)
- (Really Angry at Little Suzy) "That's it, kid! I've had enough! I'm really sick of all this stuff! I don't want cookies, can't ya see? Now get your stuff away from me! I will not buy them, not one box. I will not eat them with a fox. I will not buy a peanut swirl. I will not buy it, little girl. I will not eat them on a boat, with a goat, or in a coat. You drive me nuts! It's really true! I've really had enough of you. You've got until the count of 3 to go away and let me be. 1--"
- "You know, that just might be crazy enough to work."
- "If loving me is wrong, you don't wanna be right!"
- (Looks in mirror)"Wait, who's that handsome guy?" (Dials phone) "Hello, 911 emergency? There's a handsome guy in my house" Oh, wait, cancel that. It's only me."
- "Hey baby, can I be your natural selection?"
- "This is not good... for my hair!"
- (whenever someone corrects him) "Right, what did I say?"
- "Aaaah. The great smell of pig!"
- "No Mama! I'm too old for the tiny pants!!"
- "Work?! (Screams in horror)"
- "(After a random story) And then my pants fell down."
- "I came, I saw, I broke a hip."
- "I may be late honey, but I'm looking good."
- "He did it!"
- "4%? That's almost 5%"
- "20,000$? That`s almost 20,000$!"
- "Space. It's really, really, really, really big."
- "If all you boys and girls will clap real hard, Johnny can make bail! Get me the Lawyer Fairy!"
- "Oh yeah! Who's the fairy, who's the fairy?! (Dances then quickly stops) You didn't see that, did you?"
- "Bad baby! Stop defying the laws of physics!"
- "Neighbor kid help! Witch's curse shrank me! Cops chasing me! I live with my mom! NO MOTIVATING GOALS!!!"
- "Some people look at Jerky an say,"Why?". Me, I look at Jerky and I say "Mmmmmmmm! Jerky!"
- "Jinkies? Isn't that a breakfast cereal?"
- "You know, that reminds me of a funny story. I was washing my head in the toilet the other day, when-- (After some time) So when the battery ran out, I realized I had my underwear over my head, the whole time! (Laughs) "
- (Johnny and Carl crash on a seemingly deserted island and were separated) "Guess Carl didn't make it. I'll miss the little fella. (short pause) Oh, well. Can't mourn forever!"
- "Four feet good! Two feet bad!"
- "It's a beautiful day. But not as beautiful as me."
- "(to Talky Tabitha) Now listen Raggedy Evil! You better stop..(Talky Tabitha throws Johnny against the wall)
- "The Beach is that way." (Holds up arm and points to show off his muscles)
- "This is gettin' really old really fast."
- "Hey babearilla, that a pretty eensie-weensie, teeny-weenie polka-dot thingy you got going there."
- [eating ice cream with a toothache] "Chomp, chomp, chomp, AAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY TOOTH! THE PAIN! THE HORRIBLE PAIN! Mmmmmmmm, creamy! Chomp, Chomp, Chomp, AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!! THE STABBING KNIVES OF PAIN! Hey! It's got nuts in it!"
- "AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!! MONSTERS FROM THE ID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
- "Oh, you will pay for this!"
- "Aw, man! That does it! This is my favorite shirt! I gotta go wash up!"
- "I am sickened... but curious."
- "(When he doesn't understand someone) Now listen mister I ain't got no time for you to be talking Greek."
- "Shut up! Mrs. Bravo, Johnny won't cooperate!"
- "My balloon! Oh, Johnny. (Runs Away Sobbing) Oh, Johnny."
- (gasps) "You broke it, you big clumsy, frameless, insensitive oaf! I'm still your best friend, though, right?"
- "Fetch me the Fez of Forgetfulness."
- "Ehh, e-everyone stay calm... because we're all doomed!"
- "Come on, disperse, people, there's nothing to see!"
- "Everyone take your big wads of cash...I mean, places."
- "I'm sorry Carl, I can't see you now. I've got HUGE dollar signs in my eyes."
- "I was never in Detroit, I don't know anything about a missing shipment of exotic sea turtles."
- "There are a thousand stories in a naked city. I only know 53 of them."
- "(Gasps), It's the famous Eye-talian actress, Gina Gotta-nice-a-body."
- Suzy: "I hope this doesn't go on my permanent record."
- Momma: "Johnny, are you warping time and space again?"
- Gorilla: "Your mamma's so big she wore high heels and struck oil...your face is so ugly it could make onions cry."
("Bravo Dooby Doo")
Velma: My glasses - I can't see without my glasses!
Johnny Bravo: My glasses - I can't be seen without my glasses!
(Johnny and Donny Osmond are at a mountain, Donny's playing a guitar)
Johnny Bravo: Okay, what's the guitar for?
Donny Osmond: I'm gonna teach you how to sing, Johnny!
Johnny Bravo: And I'm gonna teach you how to shut up!
Donny Osmond: Neat! It would be like a trade!
- (In a parody of Green Eggs & Ham)
- Suzy: "Would you eat them with a fox?"
- Johnny Bravo: "If the fox were Courtney Cox. But since that is not the case, get that stuff away from my face."
- Johnny Bravo: "Oh, you are Fidel Castro"
- Luke Perry: "Eh, no Luke Perry"
- Johnny Bravo: "Right, What did I say?"
- Luke Perry: "Hey, look I have to go"
- Johnny Bravo: "No wait I am your biggest fan. I based all my life in you and all the cast of Baywatch"
- Luke Perry: "Don't you mean 90210"
- Johnny Bravo: "Ah, Luke Perry"
("A Wolf in a Chick's Clothing")
- Johnny Bravo: "Give me two tickets, please."
- Woman at Movie Ticket Booth: "No pets allowed."
- Johnny Bravo: "She ain't no pet. She's a werewolf."
- Woman at Movie Ticket Booth: "A werewolf?" [screams out of the booth and flees]
- Johnny Bravo: [to Fluffy] "I guess that means we don't have to pay".
- Momma: "Johnny, have you been taking good care of your teeth?"
- Johnny Bravo: "Yes, Momma. I've been brushing everyday with this baking soda and peroxide." [holds up jar]
- Momma: "Johnny, this isn't baking soda and peroxide, its cane sugar and molasses."
- Johnny Bravo: "To-may-to, To-mah-to."
- Kid: shouts "Look, Mommy! That guy's looking at pictures of almost naked men!"
- [the whole store stares at Johnny]
- Johnny Bravo: "This is a men's fitness magazine, I want to look like this, not at this... I've got nothin' to be ashamed of!"
- [walks up to cashier ashamed, and drops change on the counter]
- Johnny Bravo: "...TV Guide."
- Jungle Boy: "He didn't mean to hurt anyone. Did you, Mister Johnny?"
- Johnny Bravo: "Of course not, kid. I wouldn't hurt a fly."
- Fly: "It's a lie. It's a lie!"
- Johnny Bravo: [running] "Did you see a gorilla around here?"
- Businessman: "No."
- Johnny Bravo: [running and stops] "Did you see a gorilla around here?"
- Hippie: "No."
- Johnny Bravo: "Did you see a gorilla around here?"
- Gorgeous woman: (flirtatious tone) "No."
- Johnny Bravo: "Did you see a..." [pauses, looks back and runs backwards]
- Old woman: "Gorilla?"
- Johnny Bravo: "Hey there hot mama, you wouldn't happen to be hiding a gorilla under them clothes, would you?"
- [gorgeous woman grabs Johnny by the arm and entangles him into a battered down victim with little effort]
- Johnny Bravo: "Yeah. She wants me."
- Johnny Bravo: [After a cooking contest] "Hey! 16th place! That's not bad!"
- Suzy: "There were only 12 contestants."
- Lois: "My name is Lois - a mistress of the night." [Thunder lighting]
- Johnny Bravo: "My name is Johnny - a Mister of the Universe. A popular girl like you is going to need some wooing".
- Lois: "Wooing? I haven't been wooed in millennia".
- Johnny Bravo: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!"
- Mama: "Johnny! What's all the commotion?"
- Johnny Bravo: "I got a toothache, mama.