Kid Icarus: Uprising

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Kid Icarus: Uprising is a video game published by Nintendo, following a young angel (Pit) and the Goddess of Light he loyally serves (Lady Palutena), in their efforts to defeat the evil Underworld Army and protect humanity. Their quest brings them into contact with a collection of heroes and villains, including Magnus, the swordsman, Medusa, the queen of the Underworld and Dark Pit, a moody doppleganger who both helps and hinders Pit. The game features multiple scenarios covered chapter by chapter, where cinemtatic dialogue between characters plays usually without interrupting gameplay.

Please note: This article may contain spoilers for those who have yet to complete the game.

Listen well, Medusa. Your days of darkness are numbered. Prepare to meet the light!
(Early line spoken by Pit, protagonist of the story)

Chapter 1 - The Return of Palutena[edit]

  • Pit: Sorry to keep you waiting! It's been too long Lady Palutena..!
    Palutena: We can chat later Pit, but now it's time to fight. The Underworld army is invading!
    Pit: (Being ambushed by an enemy) Whoa! You weren't kidding. If these are Underworld troops, are you saying Medusa's been-?
    Palutena: Resurrected, yes. Though the Goddess of Darkness was defeated long ago, she's back now. And as the Goddess of Light, it's my duty to protect humanity from her.
    Pit: Eh, you worry too much!

  • Pit: Do you hear that? Do you hear the people's cheers?! They're celebrating the return of the Goddess Palutena!

  • Medusa: What better way to celebrate my return, than with a festive, little bloodbath? After all, I have been gone twenty-five years.

  • Pit: Twinbellows?!
    Palutena: The Underworld's faithful watchdog!
    Pit: Old Pit's gonna teach you some NEW tricks. Now play dead!

Chapter 2 - Magnus and the Dark Lord[edit]

  • Pit: Ugh, this weather's nasty...
    Palutena: Yes, but your next mission can't wait. You must defeat Dark Lord Gaol.
    Pit: Heh heh, Dark Lord? Seriously? Hasn't the Dark Lord thing been done to death?
    Palutena: He's earned it. He's working for Medusa. Her forces are coming from HIS castle. A human army is going to fight him, but they don't stand a chance.
    Pit: So what you're saying is you need a brave hero to face the Dark Lord?
    Palutena: I suppose it IS an old story, but don't forget this is the Underworld Army we're dealing with, and anybody with the title Dark Lord isn't going to be some low level minion.
    Pit: So what are we talking about here? Mini-boss? Final boss? Well, whatever. I hope this Dark Lord's ready for a hot plate of punishment!

  • Palutena: Dark Lord Gaol's castle is up ahead.
    Pit: But... But what about that wall?
    Palutena: Don't worry, I'll help you over.
    Pit: (suddenly flying vertically at high speed) WhooooooooooaaaaaAAAAAAAAA! G-G Force in my faaaaaaaaace!!
    Palutena: It's fun, right?

  • Palutena: He's using this castle as a stronghold for Underworld monsters. Monsters designed to reek havoc and sow sadness... Are you excited?!
    Pit: *tuts* Yeah. It's like a birthday party where everyone wants to kill me.

  • Palutena: He (Magnus) may not be made of the sturdiest moral fibre, but that's fine with me.
    Pit: I'm surprised you feel that way.
    Palutena: Humans are driven by desire. It's convinient to know what bait they'll chase!
    Pit: That's kinda cold, but I guess it makes sense...
    Magnus: Hey. If you're chatting with your precious goddess, give her a message from me. Tell her she's been sleeping on the job. My world's on the brink of collapse!
    Palutena: I take it back. This guy's a jerk.

Chapter 3 - Heads of the Hewdraw[edit]

  • Left Hewdraw Head: Hello there!
    Middle Hewdraw Head: It's snack time!
    Right Hewdraw Head: Mmm, what a tender little morsel!
    Pit: I am NOT a piece of meat!
    Right Hewdraw Head: What did you say?
    Middle Hewdraw Head: Technically, you are.
    Left Hewdraw Head: Just come a little closer.
    Pit: Get ready, 'cause it's time for--
    (All three heads speak simultaneously)
    Right Hewdraw Head: Total Annihilation!
    Left Hewdraw Head: Bone-crushing destruction!
    Middle Hewdraw Head: Face-stomping carnage!
    Middle Hewdraw Head: It was MY turn to have the last word!
    Left Hewdraw Head: Oh, give it a rest.
    Right Hewdraw Head: Let's not argue in front of company.
    Middle Hewdraw Head: Cram a sock in it, foot face!
    Left Hewdraw Head: I'm sooo sick of you guys.
    Right Hewdraw Head: Me?! What did I do?!
    Left Hewdraw Head: Knock it off already!
    Right Hewdraw Head: YOU knock it off!
    Middle Hewdraw Head: I can't believe this is my life.
    Left Hewdraw Head: Can we go home and watch TV now?
    Right Hewdraw Head: Would everyone just shut it!?
    Middle Hewdraw Head: Someone put me out of my misery.
    Right Hewdraw Head: Did I mention I'm starving?
    Middle Hewdraw Head: And you think we're not?
    Pit: Um... now what?
    Palutena: This is never going to end. Just go ahead and attack.
    All Hewdraw Heads: EVERYONE SHUT UP AND FOCUS!

  • Left Hewdraw Head: I never noticed this before, but you really have a certain "Je ne sais quoi."
    Pit: I'm not sure what you mean by that.
    Left Hewdraw Head: It's French... for I'M GONNA EAT YOU!

  • Middle Hewdraw Body: Look how far you've come Pit. I'm proud of you... (disappears)
    Pit: Huh... You don't normally meet such nice bosses.

  • Right Hewdraw Body: B-Before I die, I just wanna say- (disappears)
    Pit: And that's the end of him!
    Palutena: I wonder what he was going to say?

Chapter 5 - Pandora's Labyrinth of Deceit[edit]

  • Pit: Whoa! Now this takes me back! Ah, memories...

  • Pandora: (sarcastic) You made it. Yay.
    Pit: Pandora! Underling of Medusa floating before me! It's time for you to atone for your crimes. I am Pit, servant of the Goddess of light! And you. Are. History!
    Palutena: What was that all about?

Chapter 6 - Dark Pit[edit]

  • Palutena: Somewhere within these ruins is Pittoo.
    Pit: Um... Gesundheit?
    Palutena: No, Pittoo. As in Pit-Two. As in Dark Pit. Pretty good nickname I came up with, huh?
    Pit: But not as great as Ptooey, right? Riiiiiiight?

  • Dark Pit: Bring it, puppet!
    Pit: Who're you calling a puppet?!
    Dark Pit: Palutena says "Jump" you jump. She says "Fight" you fight. It sounds like a very satisfying existence... for her that is.
    Pit: I have absolute faith in Lady Palutena!
    Dark Pit: The Mirror of Truth doesn't lie. I'm a reflection of your true self, so maybe your faith in her isn't quite so absolute after all.
    Pit: What would YOU know about faith, you treacherous black heart?! Lady Palutena always guides me the right way, that's why I follow her. And the Mirror of Truth you mentionned? It's nothing more than a pane of lies! Pandora was just using it as bait.
    Dark Pit: Looks like I touched a nerve. Methinks the puppet doth protest too much...
    Pit: Oh will you give it a rest already?!
    Dark Pit: Ok, fine. Do what you want... or rather keep doing what SHE wants. But I for one refuse to be a puppet. These wings take me where I want to go.

Chapter 7 - The Seafloor Palace[edit]

  • Tanatos: Oh goodie! Guests! Protecting an impregnable fortress can get awfully lonely!
    Palutena: Is that you Tanatos?
    Thanatos: Actually, I go by "Thanatos" now. The extra H is for HAMAZING!
    Pit: ...Have we met before?
    Thanatos: I'm wounded, truely I am. I know it's been a while, but surely you haven't forgotten your old foe.
    Pit: Sorry...there are just so many foes and only one of me.
    Palutena: You know we've crushed Medusa's other commanders, Thanatos. Just give us the key to the Underworld, and we won't be forced to harm you.
    Thanatos: Hoo hoo hoo! Impatient as always, I see! But since you've come all this way...wouldn't you like to stay and catch up for a bit? Oh, pretty please?
    Palutena: So you're not going to give up the key.
    Thanatos: No need to get all huffy now! I'll have you know that I much prefer honey to vinegar. And I prefer witty repartee to any condiment!
    Pit: This is getting nowhere. Our goal here is to track down Medusa, right?
    Palutena: Yes, Thanatos is basically Medusa's right-hand man. That's why he has the only key to the Underworld.
    Thanatos: I have no such thing! None whatsoever! Honestly. HONESTLY.
    Pit: How did THIS guy get to be Medusa's second in command?
    Palutena: Beats me. Seniority?
    Thanatos: Helloooo? It's rude to exclude!
    Pit: Okay, if Thanatos won't give up the key, we'll have to take it from him.
    Palutena: The longer we wait, the more we have to lose. We need to strike soon. We only have a little way to go, so buckle down.
    Pit: I'm buckled and ready!
    Thanatos: Yoo hoo! Can you hear me? I'd like to be a part of this conversation please!
    Pit: Shut it already!
    Thanatos: Me? But you've been talking this whole game!

Chapter 9 - Medusa's Final Battle[edit]

  • Pit: We did it! We really did it!
    Palutena: Congratulations! I know it wasn't always easy.
    Pit: Aw, but it was so worth it! With the world at peace again, even the sun feels warmer.
    Palutena: Aw, you're so cute, Pit.
    (Both start laughing)
    Mysterious voice: Now wait just a second.
    Pit: Huh?
    Palutena: Did you hear something?
    Mysterious voice: I said wait just a second.
    Pit: I've got to be hearing things.
    Mysterious voice: Ha ha ha ha ha! (Tears the credits away)
    Palutena: Hades!?
    Pit: Who's Hades?
    Palutena: The true Master of the Underworld.
    Hades: Sorry to keep YOU waiting. But now that I'm here, let's get this party started. Welcome to MY underworld, Pitty Pat. You too, pretty Palutena.
    Palutena: I'm... honored you know who I am.
    Hades: So this little angel took down big, bad, Medusa all by himself. What an accomplishment! Goodness, you should put this on your resume!
    Pit: Uh, what's with this guy?

Chapter 11 - Viridi, Goddess of Nature[edit]

  • Pit: (After avoiding a reset bomb) W-what was that?
    Viridi: Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Nice shot, if I do say so myself! Good riddance, human scum! The world's better of without you!
    Palutena: That was the goddess of Nature, Viridi.

  • Pit: Good! There are survivors!
    Palutena: They're a stubborn bunch hanging on like that. Set as many free as you can.
    Pit: Uh... stubborn?
    Palutena: Oh! I didn't mean it like that..!
    Viridi: Maybe what you meant to say was "insignificant?"

  • Pit: (while fighting Cragalanche) Guy dosn't talk much, does he?
    Viridi: He's a rock. Last I checked, they're more the strong, silent type. Tell you what - I'll do the talking for him. CRAGALANCHE CRUSH!

  • Pit: It looks like there's a weak spot on his butt!
    Viridi: Gah! Oh, he was supposed to get that fixed!
    Pit Thanks for the tip.
    Viridi: I didn't say anything.
    Pit: It's butt kicking time. Literally!
    Viridi: Oh shut up! You're not clever at all!

Chapter 13 - The Lunar Sanctum[edit]

  • Pit: (singing) #Again today, I will go soaring through the sky! My enemies, I'll dish 'em up in a stir fry! Gracious Goddess o-of Light, watches from up above! At dinner time, I always show the cook some love!#
    Palutena: What are you singing?
    Pit: Just this little victory song I came up with.

Chapter 15 - Mysterious Invaders[edit]

  • Pit: Hey look! An Exo-Tank!
    Hades: Hey look! Who cares?

  • Pit: Woo-hoo-hoo! A hot-spr-! (the hot spring is carried away on a platform) Where's it going?! Get back here hot spring!
    Paltuena: Don't worry, there are stairs to your right that'll take you to it.
    Pit: I love you, hot spring!!

  • Pit: (attacked by a Mimicutie enemy) No, no, no, no, no, no...
    Hades: What elegance! What grace! What disturbing brutality..!
    Pit: No, no, no, no, no, no!!

Chapter 16 - The Aurum Hive[edit]

  • Viridi: None of these battleships seem to have a helm...
    Palutena: And I'm not detecting any lifeforms in the ships either.
    Viridi: Something has to be controlling them!
    Hades: (in a robotic voice) We are from outer spaaaaaaaaace.
    Palutena: Yes, yes. You're hilarious.

  • Pit: So now what? We just go home and order a pizza?
    Palutena: I DO have a coupon...
    Viridi: You two have more pedestrian tastes than I expected.
    Hades: Don't curse the darkness. Light a candle! When freaky aliens give you lemons, make freaky alien lemonade. Like THIS!! (slams an Aurum ship right into the hull of the Hive)
    Pit: Wah! Well, that's one way to do it.
    Viridi: That. Was. AWESOME.

  • Palutena: Look, an Aether Ring.
    Viridi It's probably just another cheap, Aurum knock-off.
    Pit: I don't care. If it works I'm gonna use it. I'm an angel, and this is how we get things done.
    Viridi: No, that's how scavengers get things done. Are you a buzzard, Pit?
    Palutena: Now, now. I think we can all agree that Pit's not a buzzard... Though I have seen him eat some questionable things off the ground.
    Pit: "Floor Ice Cream" gives you health!!

Chapter 18 - The Ring of Chaos[edit]

  • Magnus: Hot springs don't usually heal humans. You must be having an effect on me.
    Pit: THIS is how you enjoy a hot spring! Step 1: Breathe deep. Step 2: Clear mind.
    Magnus: Okay...
    Pit: Step 3: Remove pants!
    Magnus: Wait, what? No, those are MY pants!

  • Pit: I missed you, Lady Palutena! I'm so glad you're back to lead me!
    Viridi: Right. About that...
    Pit: Huh?! Viridi?
    Viridi: That's right. I'm the one controlling your flight path.
    Pit: Really? How is that even possible?
    Viridi: Don't you know? Anything Palutena can do, I can do better! So, do you want my help or not?
    Pit: Actually, I was just thinking about how nice it would be to fly on my own.
    Viridi: Yeah? Not an option.

  • Palutena: Well, it's been a while, Pit.
    Pit: It's like the entire world's been turned upside down! What's going on?
    Palutena: Everything changes, Pit. Even Gods. And to be frank, I'm tired of fighting for those ungrateful humans. And I'm especially tired of dealing with you!

Chapter 20 - Palutena's Temple[edit]

  • Pit: So, Viridi, tell me about this Chaos Kin you mentioned earlier.
    Viridi: Oh, right, I almost forgot. Little is known about the Chaos kin except for this. It takes its victims back to its nest, the Chaos Vortex, and consumes their souls.
    Pit: Well, that's disturbing.
    Viridi: It melts them down and then slowly chews away at them. Even more frightening is the Chaos Kin's ability to control the soul's owner.
    Pit: Does that mean that Lady Palutena is under the Chaos Kin's control right now?
    Viridi: It's very likely. And as for who turned you into a ring, who would be capable of such a thing? You yourself admitted that Palutena's put you in some very dangerous situations.
    Pit: She must have been acting under the Chaos Kin's control. But there's no time to think about that. I have to save Lady Palutena before the Chaos Kin consumes her soul.
    Viridi: You think it starts from her head or her feet? Big bites or tiny nibbles?
    Pit: (Disturbed) Wow, Viridi. just... Wow.

  • Viridi: All right! It's finally time to save Palutena.
    Hades: "Save Palutena"? Don't you mean "crush Palutena"?
    Pit: (annoyed) Go home, Hades. Just go home.

Chapter 21 - The Chaos Vortex[edit]

  • Dark Pit: Then it's time.
    Pit: Time for what?
    Dark Pit: Our pre-boss-battle rallying cry!
    Pit: Oh, right. OK. Ahem. Filth of the land, hear our words!
    Dark Pit: And see our actions!
    Pit: I am Pit, servant of the goddess of light!
    Dark Pit: And I am Dark Pit, servant to no other but myself!
    Pit and Dark Pit: Together we will rain death upon you!
    Dark Pit: So, anyone who wants to die, step right up!
    Pit: And anyone who doesn't want to die, too bad!
    Pit and Dark Pit: Aw, yeah!

  • Pit: Viridi! I need to fly!
    Viridi: You already used the Power of Flight, don't you remember? If I enable it again now, your wings will catch fire!
    Pit: The Chaos Kin is going to destroy Pittoo! Can't you see what's at stake here? I don't care if my wings catch fire!
    Viridi: No way, just forget it. I'm pulling you out!
    Pit: No! Stop! If we don't help him right now, we won't get another chance. I'm begging you Viridi... Let me fly! NOW!
    Viridi: Ugh. Fine! But whatever happens to you isn't my fault!
    (Viridi activates the power of flight and Pit's wings begin to burn)
    Viridi: Hang in there Pit, be strong!
    Dark Pit: Help me...!

    Pit catches up to, and rescues Dark Pit, and Viridi pulls him to safety

    Dark Pit: H-How's Pit?
    Viridi: Pit... Pit's in bad shape. He can't fly. He's barely breathing. (Palutena approaches Pit, and holds him in her arms) Palutena? What are you doing?
    Pit (flashback) My wish would be to fly by myself.
    Pit (flashback) I'll return to Skyworld victorious!
    Palutena: Oh, Pit...

Chapter 23 - Lord of the Underworld[edit]

  • (If playing the chapter without the Three Sacred Treasures)
    Hades:Oh, not bad, Pitty Pat!
    Pit:That's right! You'd better watch yourself!
    Hades: Now isn't that just... PRECIOUS! (Blows Pit away with a burp)
    Pit: Ah-oooooooooooh! Ungh!
    Hades: Now that felt good!
    Palutena: Are you OK there, Pit?
    Pit: Hades has got some raunchy breath!
    Hades: That's really the least of your concerns!

  • (If playing the chapter with the Three Sacred Treasures)
    Hades: Ooh! Do I spy with my little eye the Three Sacred Treasures?
    Pit: Even your darkness can't hide from the light!
    Hades: Now isn't that just... PRECIOUS! (Destroys the Three Sacred Treasures)
    Pit: Ah-oooooooooooh! Ungh!
    Hades: Now that felt good!
    Palutena: Not the Three Sacred Treasures!
    Pit: What?! NO!
    Hades: Not quite so tough now, are ya?

  • Hades: That really hurt. But hey... At least I'm not dead.

Chapter 24 - The Three Trials[edit]

  • Palutena: Given the current circumstances, I don't see how we can defeat Hades.
    Pit: So you got us some help?
    Palutena: Not yet. That's why we're going to meet Dyntos.
    Pit: Cool! I can't wait to meet the God of Snacks!
    Palutena: Actually, he's the God of the Forge. He made the Three Sacred Treasures. He creates ALL weapons, even that sad little one you're using now.
    Pit: It's not sad, it's awesome!
    Palutena: Thanks to Hades, the Three Sacred Treasures are out of commission. But I'm hoping Dyntos will create a new weapon for you.
    Pit: A superpowered one, right?
    Palutena: Yes, but I should warn you-
    Pit: Good thing he's on our side!
    Palutena: Well, not yet.

  • Pit: So what's the story with that place, anyway?
    Dyntos: That, my winged friend, was a Zodiac Chamber. As you know, Zodiac Chambers contain special weapons and powers. You did know that, didn't you?
    Palutena: Information sharing is performed on a strictly need-to-know basis.

  • Pit: All right, that's the last of them! Can I have my new weapon now?
    Dyntos: Not so fast. Do you remember the name of this chapter?
    Pit: Uh... wasn't it "The One Trial" or something?
    Dyntos: You're a couple trials short there, sonny!

Chapter 25 - The War's End[edit]

  • Hades: Playing hard to get, are you? (Begins running after Pit)
    Pit: Aaaaaugh!
    Hades: Good thing I've been training!
    Viridi: It's kinda like watching an elephant sprint!

  • Hades: Ow!
    Pit: Did I beat him?
    No, I'm fine. But I could've sprained my ankle, you know! Good thing... I DIDN'T!
    Pit: What's the matter, Hades? You had enough?
    Hades: Oh, no! I'm just getting started! Let's see if you can keep up! (Flies off)
    Pit: You can't run from me! Engaging Pursuit mode!

  • Viridi: He's covered from head to toe in weaponry. Like a rainbow apocalypse.
    Hades: I prefer to think of it as my devastation ensemble. I only wear it for very special occasions. You know, weddings, armageddons...

Dialogue about weapons[edit]

  • Palutena: Bows are a really good fit for you.
    Pit:: Yeah, I've been using them for a long time. I used them in the last Brawl.
    Palutena:: Brawl? How horrible! Were you hurt?
    Pit:: No way, it was a smash!
    Palutena:: I just can't imagine you in a melee.
    Pit:: ...That's because I wasn't.

  • Viridi: I see you're using a cannon, Pit.
    Pit: Now THIS is a weapon worthy of the gods!
    Viridi:: Oh, because gods loooove grenade launchers.
    Pit: "What" launchers? I don't know what you're talking about.
    Viridi: A weapon that launches explosive rounds. It won't be long before humans get their hands on these as well...
    Pit: They can't be trusted with this technology! They'd go around shooting everything!
    Viridi: Do you not see the irony in what you just said?
    Pit: Nope!

Extra/Secret dialogue[edit]

  • Pit: Aw, geez. She (Medusa) was a huge pain twenty-five years ago... and that was only in two dimensions!

  • Viridi: I wish I had an angel to do my bidding. It's like having an Intern.
    Pit: I'm not an intern! I'm a messenger of the gods!
    Viridi: Poor Pit. Don't you know that the definition of angel is "errand spirit?"
    Pit: That's a lie. Right Lady Palutena? I'm not your personal assisstant!
    Palutena: ...I could use a coffee.
    Pit: Sure thing. Cream and two sugars, right?

  • Palutena: The monster situation is quite claimant.
    Pit: Is that... a good thing?
    Palutena: You know, it's importunate. Or unpropitious.
    Pit: Are you still speaking English right now?
    Palutena: I'm sorry, Pit. I didn't mean to confuse you. Let me make this easier for you. BIG MONSTERS KILL PIT! GRR!
    Pit: Ah, that makes perfect sense! Thank you!

External links[edit]

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