Mississippi (film)

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Queenie Smith as Alabam'

Mississippi is a 1935 musical comedy film about about a young pacifist who, after refusing on principle to defend his sweetheart's honor and being banished in disgrace, joins a riverboat troupe as a singer and acquires a reputation as a crackshot after a saloon brawl in which a villain accidentally kills himself with his own gun.

Directed by A. Edward Sutherland. Written by Francis Martin and Jack Cunningham, based on the play The Magnolia by Booth Tarkington.

Commodore Jackson[edit]

  • Never mind what I told you! You do as I tell you!
  • I like women as I like elephants, I like to look at 'em but I wouldn't own one.
  • Even a dead fish can float downstream.
  • Whilst travelling through the Andes mountains, we lost our corkscrew. Had to live on food and water for several days!


General Rumford: And here… Here is a little jug of liquor.
Commodore Jackson: Oh, thank you. A nice little noggin, yes.
General Rumford: Yeah. It’s made right here on the plantation, so you needn’t be afraid of it.
Commodore Jackson: Never been frightened of liquor in all my life.

Commodore Jackson: My last encounter with the redskins was over thirty-five years ago. I was a mere stripling.
Skeptical Passenger: Is that so?
Commodore Jackson: I whipped out my revolver...
Skeptical Passenger: Revolvers weren't invented thirty-five years ago.
Commodore Jackson: Uh... uh... I know that, but the Indians didn't know it. It doesn't matter - I threw it away.
Female passenger: Oh, how exciting - please don't interrupt.
Commodore Jackson: I had just swum the rapids. I had my canoe under one arm and a Rocky Mountain goat under the other.
Skeptical Passenger: How could you swim without the use of your arms?
Commodore Jackson: Uh, uh... in those days I had, uh, I had very strong legs. Uh, excuse me. [sheepishly doffs hat to woman] very strong limbs.
Female passenger: You must have been full of fire in your youth.
Commodore Jackson: I had to carry fire insurance until I was over forty. As I arrived at the river bank, I was encountered by the entire tribe of the Shug Indians. The most ferocious... have you ever been to Shug country?
Skeptical Passenger: [glaring] No, I haven't.
Commodore Jackson: Uh, that's fine. I unsheathed my Bowie knife and cut a path through this wall of human flesh, dragging my canoe behind me.
Female passenger: [collapsing] Oh, oh, oh... oh.
Commodore Jackson: Ah, I'm sorry. Perhaps I've gone too far.
Skeptical Passenger: What, what happened to the goat?
Commodore Jackson: He was very good with mustard.

Naive card-player: Is this a game of chance?
Commodore Jackson: Not the way I play it, no.

Gambler #1: Four aces.
Commodore Jackson: Huh?
Gambler #2: That's funny... I've got four aces.
Commodore Jackson: Oh, don't tell me.
Gambler #1: [brandishing a pistol] There's only four aces in the deck and the man that holds the first four wins.


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