Yes folks, this isn't any cheap X-rated movie or any 5th rate porno play, this is the show you want! Lady Divine's cavalcade of perversions, the sleaziest show on earth! Not actors, not paid impostors, but real actual filth who have been carefully screened in order to present to you the most flagrant violation of natural law known to man! These assorted sluts, fags, dykes and pimps know no bounds! They have commited acts against God and nature, acts that by their mere existence would make any decent person recoil in disgust!
[going through someone else's wallet] What ugly children they have!
Ricky! Ricky! Bring me something strong, something I can get off on!
If it wasn't for me you'd still be back in Boston doing poodle-nappings from those old bitches.
I was in agony! I had been raped before but never in such an unnatural and brutal way!
It was then that I realized that she was using her rosary as a tool of erotic pleasure! She made me get into a kneeling position. My head was spinning. And all at once, she inserted her rosary into one of my most private parts!
I usually sleep in churches, you know, in the confessionals. They lock all the churches up at night now because of all the thieves and they never check the confessionals. Saturday nights are the only problem, and nights that are holy days because of early masses the next day. And Lent, shit, forget it, I gotta hang in synagogues then, and it's just not the same thing if you know what I mean.
Oh, Jesus, you're my first celebrity I ever gave a rosary job to! And at St. Cecilia's, oh, wow, imagine!
Audience Member: She's a dyke! Look at those tattoos.
Bonnie: Oh Mr. David, this is even better than amyl nitrate. It's better than Carvada. It's even better than heroin! Oh Jesus, this is even better than last time! if only we could perform acts 24 hours a day! Oh, that would be supreme happiness.
Cookie: You've driven me from my own home! [gets shot]