No Hard Feelings (2023 film)

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No Hard Feelings is a 2023 American sex comedy film about a 32-year-old Uber driver who answers an ad to date a shy 19-year-old in order to boost his confidence prior to college.

Directed by Gene Stupnitsky. Written by Gene Stupnitsky and John Phillips.
Pretty. Awkward.taglines
It was a long time ago. Who cares?
"I care."

Maddie Barker[edit]

  • [sees a couple on their phone in a bedroom] Does anyone even fuck anymore?
  • [after a car honks at her while she roller-blades on the road] YOU THINK I CHOSE THIS?!


  • [protesting skinny dipping in the ocean at night] Isn't this how Jaws started?


Maddie: Do you want me to date him, or "date" him?
Laird, Allison: Yes!
Laird: Date him!
Allison: Date him!
Laird: Date him hard!
Maddie: I'll date his brains out!

Maddie: [after fighting a few kids in the nude] What about you? Want some business?
Beach Bully: No, no, no, take it, take it.
Maddie: You think it's cool to steal clothes?
Beach Bully: You need fucking help. Call the cops.
Maddie: Stay the fuck out of Montauk!

Maddie: It was a long time ago. Who cares?
Percy: I care.

Maddie: I had this really intense dream about you last night. Don't ask.
Percy: Of course. That's private.
Maddie: Do you ever have those?
Percy: Uh, intense dreams? Um... Actually, uh, yeah.
Maddie: Tell me.
Percy: You know Harley Quinn from Suicide Squad?
Maddie: Okay.
Percy: I had this one dream where I wouldn't let her adopt a dog. So she'd locked me in one of the dog cages and dragged me back to her hideout. I kicked at the cage and screamed. [Maddie looks confused]
Maddie: And that made you come?
Percy: Uh... I did not.
Maddie: How the fuck is that a sex dream?
Percy: You asked me if I have intense dreams.

Cameron B: [filming himself on phone] Yo, yo, what's going on, you guys? It's your boy, Cameron B. We are kicking the summer off right at a sick house party in Montauk.
Trash Gucci: [also filming himself] Now me. Yo, what's up? It's me, Trash Gucci. If you or someone you know is being bullied, never be afraid to speak up. [Maddie steps in the background of their filming to use the beer keg] Bullying is not a...
Cameron B: [to Maddie] Excuse me, ma'am. Can you not do that while we're recording? Thank you.
Maddie: Just getting a beer, Frosted.
Cameron B: [to Trash Gucci] Did she just call me Frosted? [he and his friend train their phones on Maddie] That, my friends, is what we call a bully, huh?
Maddie: Oh, no, not a phone. Someone help, I'm being filmed.

Jim: You could always sell your kidney. You could sell your hair, your plasma, your eggs. The human body's a cash cow. People don't understand that.
Sara: Jim, I can feel our baby getting dumber.

[at a bar with Maddie]
Percy: I just hope my parents don’t find out that I’m here.
Maddie: Do they come here?
Percy: No, no. They track my phone.
Maddie: Wow, okay. Do they microchip you too?

Percy: You're gonna be okay.
Maddie: What are you, some kind of wise Buddha? You're gonna be okay.
Percy: We're both gonna be okay.

[Maddie is being kicked out of a teen's party]
Maddie: Your fucking parents are here?
Party Mother: You think our son would have a party without our consent?


  • Pretty. Awkward.
  • Not a love story.


External links[edit]