Ocean's Twelve is a 2004 film. Set three years after Ocean's Eleven this sequel shows us Danny Ocean gathering up his complete gang of con artists and thieves from the first film in New York City before they all jet off to Amsterdam, Rome, and Paris to pull off three seperate heists about
- If all the animals on the equator were capable of flattery, then Thanksgiving and Hallowe'en would fall on the same date.
- [watching "Happy Days" dubbed in Italian] That guy doing Potsie is unbelievable.
- [to Topher Grace] Geez, Topher, you don't have to go all Frankie Muniz on me.
- (to Danny Ocean) 10:45, we all get arrested.
- (to Linus Caldwell) If you are going to ask me a question give me some time to respond, unless the question is rhetorical in which case the answer is obvious, yes.
- [about Danny] Where is he, Tess? Where is... Mr. Diaz?
- [to Rusty Ryan] I was asked to show some restraint. Otherwise, you would have gone out to your favorite car with all the 17 you own and as soon as you turn on the ignition--[car explodes] You got two weeks.
- [to Linus] Who died and made you Danny?
- [to Isabel, who is posing as Nicole, about Rusty Ryan] And tell him it's gonna cost him double. [pause] And tell him this thing is beautiful. And tell him I'm being a nice guy. And tell him he dresses like a gigolo. (on being asked if that is all) Yeah. No! Tell him--tell Rusty that having a sexy female assistant is such a terrible cliche. [Hangs up. Sexy female assistant emerges with Nagel's treo and brings him a coffee]
- [ to Turk] Yeah, well I need to use the toilet otherwise I'm gonna shit on your shoes! C'mon Frank...
- Are you having some telethon we don't know about?!
- [Meeting a fortune teller, notices Benedict and his goons behind him] THIS? You couldn't see this?!
- Linus: Hey, can I ask you something? You ever notice that...
- Rusty: If you're gonna ask me a question, give me time to respond. Unless you're asking rhetorically, in which case the answer is obvious - yes.
- Linus: Okay, can I ask you...
- Rusty: Yes.
- Linus: Thanks. You ever notice that Tess looks...
- Rusty: Ooh, don't ever ask that. Ever. Seriously. Not to anyone, especially not to her.
- Linus: Wait, why not?
- Rusty: Look, it's not in my nature to be mysterious. But I can't talk about it and I can't talk about why.
- Linus: Oooooooooo.
- Benedict: I have a message for Robert Charles Ryan, soon to be the ex-owner of the Standard Hotel.
- Rusty: You got him.
- Benedict: The last we spoke, you hung up on me.
- Rusty: You used nasty words. I got sensitive ears
- Topher: Jesus Christ! Are you people retarded?! It says "Do not disturb"!
- Rusty: It's me.
- Tess: You're doing recon work on our anniversary?
- Danny: Tess...
- Danny: Do I look 50 to you?
- Basher: Yeah.
- Danny: Really?
- Basher: Well, I mean, you know, only from the neck up.
- Turk: It's ridiculous, I mean this is a moral issue we're dealing with here. Not to mention we don't have a grease man anymore, because he's in a bag somewhere. We don't know.
- Virgil: We got a bag man.
- Turk: Such an ape, an animal, with no feelings you are.
- Virgil: I have feelings.
- Turk: No, you don't.
- Virgil: Look, yeah, I do I feel bad for the guy. He's a human being in a piece of luggage, but you got water, he's got air. What did you want them to do?
- Turk: Oh my God, they should have gotten off the bus, get off the bus and pick up the bag with our friend in it.
- Virgil: Get off the bus, they were trying to be inconspicuous. How many soccer teams do you know that are fielding 50 year-old men?
- Danny: Rusty's not 50 years old.
- Turk: Yeah dude, we know Rusty's not 50.
- Danny: You think I'm 50 years old? Let me ask you something... [to Virgil] no, let me ask you something: how old do you think I am?
- Virgil: 48?
- Danny: You think I'm 48 years old?
- Virgil: 52?
- [Danny walks off]
- Linus: What did I say?
- Danny: You called his niece a whore.
- Linus: What?!?
- Rusty: A very cheap one.
- Danny: She's seven.
- Rusty: Currently confined to bed with a wicked case of...
- Danny: No, don't tell him that.
- Rusty: I'm sorry.
- Turk: Hell in a hand-basket?
- Linus: No, we... can't train a cat that quickly. And...
- Turk, Linus, Basher: [together] Not enough people!
- Virgil: Doesn't this guy believe in fresh air?
- Rusty: He opens the second floor window every now and then.
- Virgil: What does that mean?
- Rusty: It means he opens the second floor window every now and then.
- Danny: What are you doing?
- Rusty: Sleeping. Why are you dressed?
- Danny: It's 5:30, day of. Gotta go, let's go!
- Rusty: It's 11:30. The night before.
- Danny: Oh... But... [realises he was given a prank wake-up call by Toulour] Oh.
- Rusty: Oh! Oh, he's mean. He's just mean spirited. All right, how many espressos did you have?
- Danny: Five.
- Linus: So we do a Lookie-Loo... it's actually a Lookie-Loo with a Bundle of Joy!
- Basher: A Lookie-Loo... with Tess... and a Bundle of Joy?
- Linus: Yeah!
- Basher: You've gone right out of your tree, my son. [looking at Turk] He's mad. It's madness.
- Turk: Yeah, it's crazy. It's Italian television crazy, and, we're still one short.
- Linus: No no, but think about it. She can get near the egg, during daylight hours, with at least half the system down! Well, that's a trifecta!
- Basher: You might be right. Make the call.
- Molly: I hope Danny And Rusty appreciate the fine job you did - in a tight jam? I'm really proud of you.
- Linus: Thanks.
- Molly: We both are.
- Linus: [pauses and looks at her] You told Dad? You told Dad?
- Molly: I had to, sweetheart. We were on vacation. [Linus shakes his head, and looks away] I'm sorry.
- Linus: Great. you guys are gonna be dining out on this one for months! Hey, you remember the time your mom had to go to Rome, blah, blah, blah? Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah?
- Reuben: If, God forbid, anything does happen to you, we will not be involved.
- Benedict: You better not be, Reuben. You better not be.
- Twelve is the new eleven
- Three years ago, they stole 160 million dollars. Now the only thing between their old enemy and their new one is an Ocean.
- Who could ever forget that thing they did that time to that guy?
- George Clooney - Daniel Ocean
- Brad Pitt - Rusty Ryan
- Matt Damon - Linus Caldwell
- Julia Roberts - Tess Ocean
- Catherine Zeta-Jones - Isabel Lahiri
- Andy Gracia - Terry Benedict
- Don Cheadle - Basher Tarr
- Vincent Cassel - François "The Nightfox" Toulour
- Albert Finney - Gaspar LeMarc (uncredited)
- Bernie Mac - Frank Catton
- Casey Affleck - Virgil Malloy
- Scott Caan - Turk Malloy
- Shaobo Qin - "The Amazing" Yen
- Carl Reiner - Saul Bloom
- Eddie Jemison - Livingston Dell
- Elliott Gould - Reuben Tishkoff