P-Valley/Season 2
Season 2
[edit]Pussyland [2.01]
[edit]- Autumn: [To Andre] I guess Chucalissa crept up in my veins like a good vice.
- Woddy: Ain't you scared?
- Murda: No. I ain't scared of the living.
- Autumn: Nothing works. Paint the walls red, bloodstains also bleed back through.
- Big Al: Hand me that hex key.
- Clifford: Chile, what that is?
- Clifford: [To Autumn] Ain't no use in being the richest bitch in the graveyard, Hailey.
- Autumn: [To Clifford] I gave you 15 percent of ownership.
- Big Al: Is that what getting rid of bodies goes for nowadays? I'm just asking ... for a friend.
- Big Al: We got denied a relief loan again, talking about how we non-essential.
- Clifford: How is we non-essential? Do they know how many niggas run around here with blue balls?
- Clifford: Jupiter, I hope you don't got no baby-daddy drama.
- Jupiter: I don't even know who he is so we good.
- Mercedes: My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard.
- Autumn: C'mon. Last dance.
- Mercedes: Sheee-it.
- Uncle Clifford: [To patron] I'm gonna need you to come deep inside.
- Patron: [To Autumn] You dancin' tonight?
- Big Al: You don't want to see that dance.
- Autumn: Need a receipt?
- Patron: No. Uh-uh. I don't need no evidence.
- Big Al: Smart man.
Seven Pounds of Pressure [2.02]
[edit]- Autumn: [To Andre] I'm waiting on that big-dick offer. You gonna give it?
- 'Woddy": [To Murda and Big Teak] Somebody's got to be alive to bury y'all.
- Clifford: I'm too much of a cat to be fucked by a kitten.
- Uncle Clifford: [To Corbin] Don't let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya.
- Uncle Clifford: It wasn't five years ago that you didn't have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of.
- Corbin: Well, thank God for dad daddies.
- Clifford: And dead mayors too.
- Autumn: [To Corbin] We appreciate your low-dick offer.
- Uncle Clifford: But we're wondering if there might be some bigger dick out in the sea.
- Autumn: Might have gotten us out of a hole. But even the Devil started out as an angel.
- Big Al: [To Mercedes] Might have gotten us out of a hole. But even the Devil started out as an angel.
- Bailey: Do you ever get (Autumn's) real name?
- Keyshawn: You never ask a stripper her real name. If she's gonna give it to you, you gotta earn it.
- Uncle Clifford: [To Big Al] Well, tell them we ain't open ... yet.
- Corbin: Well, closed legs don't get fed.
- Mercedes: I ain't no motherfuckin' coach.
- Autumn: You are, actually.
- Big Al: Give me your name and give me your number.
- Big Bone: They call me Big Bone, baby.
- Big Al: Big Bone, meet Big Al.
The Dirty Dozen [2.03]
[edit]- Murda: You kiss sloppy.
- Keyshawn: You welcome, nigga.
- Duffy: Your friend [whispers] can't be dropping knowledge like that and walking away.
- Roulette: She do that sometimes.
- Whisper: You really might be from Hell. You got a lot of darkness in you.
- Roulette: Excuse you?
- Whisper: That wasn't no shade. We all need a little Hell in our lives. It makes you appreciate the light.
- Mercedes: I ain't no ho.
- Farrah: You're getting paid $10,000 a weekend to have sex in a condo with my husband, correct? Don't worry. I don't get paid that much and I have to lay under him all fuckin' week. Want to trade places?
- Mercedes: Hell, no.
- Patrice: [To Wayne] The only reason you on the ballot is because the mayor's dead. But I digress.
- Clifford: [To Big Bone] You'd best bring your best poppin' playlist because we opening doors, legs, and wallets...
- Clifford: Can't nobody replace Mercedes.
- Autumn: Everybody can be replaced.
- Clifford: [To Autumn] 69 is a real nice position to take. It shows you can suck it and take it at the same damn time.
- Patrice: [To Terrika] You sure look like Mercedes when you lie.
- Coach: I don't need the exposure.
- Mercedes: But I bet you need that Mercedes experience.
- Mercedes: [To Roulette] Mind the business that pays you.
Demethrius [2.04]
[edit]- Mercedes: [To Autumn] You're an easy bitch to love but an easier bitch to hate.
- Clifford: You look like a man whose wife has just cheated on him.
- Andre: I am.
- Clifford: Well, damn.
- Clifford: You need some sugar.
- Ernestine: All the sugar I need is that black panther over there.
- Farrah: What if I fall?
- Mercedes: What if you fly?
- Duffy: [To Clifford] You know I got ho's and bro's in all different areas, don't ya?
- Farrah: [To Mercedes] So why were you in such a hurry to leave us all high and wet?
- Brittany: What you doin', Andre? You ain't gonna win.
- Andre: Well, I've certainly got nothing left to lose.
- Autumn: Corbin, what's you doing here so early in the morning?
- Corbin: It's noon.
- Autumn: I guess I'm still on stripper time.
- Murda: Woddy, where my promos at?
- Woddy: You would look good in some lashes and some nails, too. Uncle Murda is the name.
- Ernestine: Well, there goes the 'hood. Well, you just earned me a side of 'not your business' with that salad. Well, I'm going to give it right back to you, topped with a side of jalapenos, because I'm a classy bitch.
- Roulette: [To Big L] Well, you just earned me a side of 'not your business' with that salad. Well, I'm going to...
- Brazil: 'Lette, I don't know why you complainin'. Work on the street is you got diverse income streams.
- Roulette: Bitch, what you talking about?
- Clifford: [To Lauren] You that heifer that fell asleep under the table after throwing up her whole divorce...
- Lauren: Most importantly, everyone needs to wear a mask at all times.
- Uncle Clifford: Don't you see what the fuck's on my face?
White Knights [2.05]
[edit]- Rome: Don't worry. I already cleared everything with your little Justin Bieber. He's great.
- Keyshawn: That wasn't the deal. I gotta get home.
- Keyshawn: [To Rome] Rome, can you stop? You makin' me seasick.
Savage [2.06]
[edit]- Big Bone: Why you don't do security for The Pynk no more? You must have tried to save one of them ho's that wasn't ready to be saved.
- Diamond: Who told you that?
- Big Bone: Your eyes. They're so heavy that every time you be fuckin' me, they be closed. Next time, I want those chestnut eyes wide open.
- Big Bone: What is it?
- Diamond: It's protection.
- Big Bone: You don't seem like the type of nigger that needs no protection.
Jackson [2.07]
[edit]- Autumn: [To Clifford] History is important, yes, but so is the future.
- Autumn: I thought you ghosted me.
- Uncle Clifford: Child, I'm the last ghost you need to be worried about in this here building.
The Death Drop [2.08]
[edit]- Mercedes: Maybe I ain't meant to fly no more.
- Clifford: Niggers come to see you fall, not fly. And your injury ain't in your shoulder. It's in your head.
- Uncle Clifford: [To Mercedes] Uh-uh-uh. Ain't no cryin' in The Pynk.
Snow [2.09]
[edit]- Stripper: Mercedes must get it from her momma.
- Andre: Blame my rise in the polls for the passion I have for my hometown.
- Newscaster: Or perhaps that stripper magic.
Mississippi Rule [2.10]
[edit]- Corbin: [To Andre] Don't mind me. Liquor makes me a little cunty.
- Brittany: Well, I guess I deserve this, huh?
- Andre: Yeah, you fuckin' do.