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Piranha 3D

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Piranha 3D is a 2010 American 3D comedy horror film in which after a sudden underwater tremor sets free scores of the prehistoric man-eating fish, an unlikely group of strangers must band together to stop themselves from becoming fish food for the area's new razor-toothed residents. It was inspired by and is a loose remake of the 1978 film Piranha.

Directed by Alexandre Aja. Written by Pete Goldfinger and Josh Stolberg.
Don't Scream...Just Swim!taglines

Julia Forester

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  • Get the fuck out of the water!
  • [brings out a taser gun] You boys take one more step, you'll be pissing lightning bolts into next week.

Novak Radzinsky

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  • There are thousands of them and they are pissed!
  • [to Mr. Goodman] Excuse me, but is that a fucking piranha?

Other

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  • Andrew Cunningham: Kelly, trust us. It's never cheating if it's with another chick.
  • Mr. Goodman: Piranha hunt in packs - not for protection, but for overwhelming force. They're organized, methodical. The first bite draws blood. The blood draws the pack.
  • Deputy Fallon: Chew on this, motherfuckers! [kills piranhas with a motorboat propeller]
  • Derrick Jones: Jake, they took my penis! They took my penis!

Dialogue

[edit]
Novak: Excuse me... but is that a fucking piranha?!
Julie Forester: Carl, it's not the only one.
Novak: [shows the torn diving suit] Here, here. Yeah, look at this. There are thousands of them. Thousands. And they're pissed!
Mrs. Goodman: You know, I've heard of this happening. It's like those baby alligators in New Jersey, somebody leaves them and they breed...
Novak: What?
Mr. Goodman: Nobody released this fish into the lake.
Julie Forester: What're you talking about?
Mr. Goodman: This particular piranha vanished off the face of the Earth over 2 million years ago! [hurries to his office]
Novak: Um, where's he going?
[Mr. Goodman grabs a large fossil off his shelf and brings it back]
Mr. Goodman: Allow me...to introduce you...[shows the fossil] Pygocentrus nattereri, the original piranha. [Novak and Julie see the live piranha almost exactly matches the fossil] They used to swim the Colorado River, right up until the Pleistocene epoch! I still don't understand how you found one...alive!
Novak: We discovered a subterranean lake through a rift caused by the earthquake.
Mrs. Goodman: But, how could it have survived for so long, cut off from the surface?
Mr. Goodman: CANNIBALISM. They must have fought each other to survive. [looks at the piranha] Look...oh, the scars on the scales. Notice the eyes.
Julie Forester: Jesus, it's like he's staring back at you.
Mr. Goodman: No, no, no. Look, staring... sensing...[slowly lowers two tips of his fingers into the tank. The piranha rushes to bite them, Goodman pulls them away in the nick of time]
Novak: God, don't do that!
Mr. Goodman: Piranha hunt in packs. Not for protection, but the overwhelming force. They're organized, methodical. The first bite draws blood, the blood draws the pack.

Jake Forester: I am so sorry. We're on the lake.
Julie Forester: What? Where are Laura and Zane?
Jake Forester: They're with me on the boat.
Julie Forester: Oh, my God, Jake! Whatever you do, do not go into the water.
Jake Forester: You don't understand, Mom. Our boat is sinking.
Julie Forester: [shocked] What? Where are you?

Danni: Nice horn.
Laura Forester: Thanks. Nice boobs.
Danni: Thanks.
Laura Forester: I have a training bra but I don't like to wear it 'cause it itches.
Danni: Tell me about it! Who are you waiting for?
Laura Forester: My brother Jake, he's seventeen. He'll like your boobs too.
Danni: They all do.

Julie Forester: Are you sure you can do this?
Danni: You better believe it. [climbing on the rope] I don't pole dance for nothing!
Julie Forester: [to Jake before handing him a radio] You've got a lot of explaining to do, young man!

Andrew: [watching Danni and Crystal swim naked] Check it out, they're fish with boobies.
Derrick Jones: Oh, if fish looked like that, I would fuck fish. I would only fuck fish!

Laura Forester: You talk funny.
Derrick Jones: Yeah, well, you're short.

Sam: Something bit me.
Paula: Oh, yeah, right. I thought you always liked that kind of stuff.

[last lines]

Mr. Goodman: [to Julie] The piranhas that killed those divers, the ones you're hunting for, they're not fully developed. They're the babies.
Novak: The babies? Huh. So where are the parents? [an adult piranha jumps out of the water and kills Novak]

Taglines

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  • Don't Scream...Just Swim!
  • There's Something in the Water
  • This Summer 3D Shows Its Teeth
  • Two million years of evolution. One perfect killer.
  • This summer, how fast can you swim?

Cast

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