Rebel High

Rebel High is a 1987 film satire about the chaos and mayhem that modern western cities' high schools became.

Directed and writeen by Harry Jakobs, based on the novel by Evan Keliher.

Where Spring Break Is Just A Cease Fire!

Dialogue

[The school inspectors inspect the guidance counselor at work from her office's window]

Ms. Simpson: What's your name again?

Sally Chao: Sally Chao.

Ms. Simpson: Are you sure you're one of my students?

Sally Chao: Of course, Ms. Simpson. You've been my couselor ever since I was a freshman.

Ms. Simpson: Well, I can't be expected to remember everybody! After all, all you black kids look the same, you know...

Sally Chao: I'm not black! I'm Chinese.

Ms. Simpson: Ok, Sally. So...how long you've been pregnant?

Sally Chao: Pregnant...?

Ms. Simpson: That's right.

Sally Chao: Ms. Simpson, I'm not pregnant. I came here to find out about a scholarship.

Ms. Simpson: Don't be silly, Sally. They don't give scholarships for getting pregnant.

Sally Chao: Ms. Simpson...

Ms. Simpson: Did you already have that baby?

Sally Chao: Ms. Simpson, you're not listening. I told you I'm not pregnant! I never have been! I only want to find out about a scholarship for college next year.

Ms. Simpson: Oh, you want a scholarship, ok. But it's going to be hard going to college with a young baby to look after.

Sally Chao: Ms. Simpson!

---

[The guidance counselor mistakes the inspector Edwin Swimper for someone else and immediately runs over to him]

Ms. Simpson: Edward!

Edwin Swimper: See, I told you this place is a madhouse!

Ms. Simpson: You came back. I never thought you'd come back. You never called, you never wrote. You never came back for your sauce...

[Ms. Simpson starts cuddling and kissing Edwin Swimper]

Inspector Beane: [suspiciously] You know this person?

Norman Relic: [tricks Edwin Swimper by whispering to Beane] Intimately.

Edwin Swimper: I've never seen her before in my life. Get off me, you're ruining my flower!

Ms. Simpson: Is that all you can say after all those nights, when I waited for your calls? Get in the bathtub with me, we'll play yogurt...

Edwin Swimper: Bathtub?! Yogurt?! Ma'am, you must be thinking of someone else!

Ms. Simpson: [still cuddling Edwin Swimper, she moves her hands around his lower regions] Oh, there's never been anybody else!

Edwin Swimper: Ah, I'm getting up with my sanity still intact! I have an erection...an inspection to do! I can't stay here! I'm busy! I'm busy!

[Ms. Simpson pulls Edwin Swimper to the floor with her. Cut to the next scene, he runs away from school as she chases him on the street screaming for him]

Running theme song

• Rebel, Rebel, Rebel High/Rebel, Rebel, Rebel High!

Cast

• Wayne Flemming - Norman Relic
• Harvey Berger - Edwin Swimper
• Kevin Fenlon - Inspector Beane
• Unknown (uncredited) actress — The Guidance Counselor Ms. Simpson
• Unknown (uncredited) actress — Sally Chao

External links

• Rebel High quotes at the Internet Movie Database
• Rebel High at Rotten Tomatoes