Serial Mom

From Wikiquote
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Serial Mom is a 1994 dark comedy about a sweet mother who is secretly a serial killer.

Written and directed by John Waters.
Every mom wants to be wanted, but not for murder one!taglines

Beverly Sutphin[edit]

  • Officer, I'm sorry, but we don't allow gum in this house.
  • Life doesn't have to be ugly. Look at the birds out there; listen to their call. [makes bird noises] Hwee, hwee, hwee, hwee.
  • [after murdering someone] I don't know what it is about today but I feel great!
  • Are those... pussy willows?
  • [after bludgeoning Mrs. Jenson] Rewind!
  • Suzanne Sommers! This is my bad side!

Others[edit]

  • Eugene Sutphin: [during sex with Beverly] Oh honey, you are hot tonight!
  • Chip Sutphin: [in response to Misty telling the family about her new love interest] You sure can pick 'em.
  • Misty Sutphin: Chip! Our mother is Charles Manson!
  • Ralph Sterner: [while having teeth drilled] Help me Betty! He's worse than the dentist in the Marathon Man!
  • Marvin Pickles: There was a lady in the men's room, I swear! A pretty little lady, in the stall right next to me!
  • Police woman: Bingo boys, bust the bitch.
  • Emma Lou Jenson: [talking to her dog] Come on, lick Mommy's feet. Get 'em all wet!
  • Detective: Proceed with caution; she is armed. And fuckin' nuts!
  • Mrs. Jenson: [having to pay $1 extra to Chip for not rewinding the film] Keep the change you son of a psycho!

Dialogue[edit]

Chip: Hey, dad, have you ever seen Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer?
Eugene: I most certainly have not!

Eugene: Listen to this, [reading from the newspaper] "Hillside Strangler gets his college degree in prison".
Beverly: That's nice, dear.
Eugene: Nice? He should have been executed!
Misty: He killed people, mom!
Beverly: We all have our bad days.

Chip: Is there a killer loose?!
Detective Pike: No, son, nothing that exciting.

[Beverly calls Dottie Hinkle]
Dottie Hinkle: Hello?
Beverly Sutphin: Is this the Cocksucker residence?
Dottie Hinkle: God damn you! Stop calling here!
Beverly Sutphin: Isn't this 4215 Pussy Way?
Dottie Hinkle: You bitch!
Beverly Sutphin: Now let me check the zip code. Two-one-two-fuck-you?
Dottie Hinkle: The police are tracing this call this very minute.
Beverly Sutphin: Well, Dottie Hinkle, then why aren't they here, huh, fuckface?
Dottie Hinkle: FUCK YOU! [hangs up]
Beverly Sutphin: [laughs manically]
[Beverly immediately calls Dottie back]
Dottie Hinkle: Didn't I just say fuck you!?
Beverly Sutphin: [in a different voice] I beg your pardon!
Dottie Hinkle: Who is this?
Beverly Sutphin: Mrs. Wilson from the telephone company. I understand you're having problems with an obscene phone caller?
Dottie Hinkle: Yes, I am; I'm sorry, Mrs. Wilson, but this is driving me crazy! I have my number changed twice already. I'm a divorced woman, please help me.
Beverly Sutphin: Well what exactly does this sick individual say to you?
Dottie Hinkle: I can't say the words out loud, I don't use bad language.
Beverly Sutphin: Oh well, I know it's difficult, but we need to know the exact words.
Dottie Hinkle: I'll try. Cocksucker, that's what she calls me.
Beverly Sutphin: [reverting to the original voice] Listen to your filthy mouth, you fuckin' whore!
Dottie Hinkle: Goddamn you!
Beverly Sutphin: Motherfucker!
Dottie Hinkle: Cocksucker!

Chip: So happy I could shit.
Beverly: Chip! You know how I hate the brown word.

Misty: Mother! It's Carl! He's dead!
Beverly: How horrible. Oh, I just sold the Peewee Herman doll!

Dottie Hinkle: Nice as pie she was to me, then I hear her say it.
Detective: Say what?
Dottie Hinkle: Are those... I can't say the words out loud.
Detective: Could you tell a police woman the exact words she used?
Dottie Hinkle: Maybe.
Police woman: It's okay, nobody's gonna hurt you. Come on, let it out.
Dottie Hinkle: PUSSY! That's what she said to me! PUSSY WILLOW!

Chip: You know, Mom, Scotty thinks you're the killer.
Beverly: [laughs] Does he? You know, for someone who doesn't wear his seatbelt Scotty sure is nosy.

Chip: Tell me the truth, Mom. Really, it's okay with me. Are you a serial killer?
Beverly: Chip, the only serial I know anything about is Rice Krispies!

Birdie: You're bigger than Freddy and Jason now! Only you're a real person!
Beverly: Do you think I need a lawyer?
Chip: You need an agent!

Beverly: Mrs. Hinkle, do you drink?
Dottie Hinkle: No, I don't.
Beverly: So you were not drunk when you received those allegedly obscene phone calls?
Dottie Hinkle: I certainly was not.
Beverly: You mean to tell me the day I came over to Mrs. Ackerman's, the day you claim you recognized my voice, you were not drinking?
Dottie Hinkle: One beer with lunch is hardly drinking.
Beverly: So you do drink?
Dottie Hinkle: Socially. I'll have a beer.
Beverly: So you admit you just lied?
Dottie Hinkle: No I don't, you bitch!
Judge: Watch your mouth, Mrs. Hinkle.
[Beverly whispers "fuck you" to Dottie]
Dottie Hinkle: Did you see that?! She just said "fuck you" to me!
Beverly: Let the record show I'm merely standing here!
Dottie Hinkle: Fuck you too, you whore!
Judge: I'm warning you, Mrs. Hinkle. One more obscenity and I'll charge you with contempt of court.
Beverly: Mrs. Hinkle, are you insane?
Dottie Hinkle: No I'm not, you motherfucker!
Judge: Mrs. Hinkle, I found you guilty of contempt, and I sentence you to a $1,000 fine and five days in jail. Lock her up.
Dottie Hinkle: You cocksucker! You lousy pig fucker! You bitch! You ugly whore! Let go of me!

Beverly: You can't wear white shoes after Labor Day!
Juror #8: That's not true anymore.
Beverly: Yes it is! Didn't your mother tell you?
Juror #8: No! Please! Fashion has changed!
Beverly: No, it hasn't.

Taglines[edit]

  • Every Mom Wants to Be Wanted, But Not For Murder One!
  • She's a fabulous, loving, caring mother, who er... ...happens to be a serial killer!
  • At least she meant well.

Cast[edit]

External links[edit]

Wikipedia
Wikipedia
Wikipedia has an article about: