Simply Irresistible (film)

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Simply Irresistible is a 1999 American romantic comedy film about a magical crab that works wonders for a terrible chef's culinary skills, leading her towards the man of her dreams.

Directed by Mark Tarlov. Written by Judith Roberts.
A bewitching romance.taglines

Tom Bartlett[edit]

  • It's like riding a bicycle. The first nine times you fall off but the tenth time you can go on for miles.
  • If the broom fits, ride it!

Jonathan Bendel[edit]

  • I like you, Lois. You're like a man. You think with your nuts.

Nolan Traynor[edit]

  • Even Dumbo flew without his feather.

Lois McNally[edit]

  • This is nutty... hazelnutty.


Amanda: My friend Nolan told me this thing about men and sex, that they think about it 238 times a day and when they do, they adjust their belts.
Tom: That's ridiculous. No, no. Not the belt-- I meant the amount. That's ridiculous. Do the math I'm awake maybe 17 hours a day. Times 60 would be 1020, divided by 238. That would be sex about every 4 minutes... Yeah, yeah. That's about right.
Amanda: I've been here 20 minutes.

Tom: I think I've loved you since that first day in the market.
Amanda: You mean the day I had my hand up your pants? Men are so easy.
Tom: Oh yeah.

Tom: I love shoes.
Brian in Shoes: Me too, Mr. Bartlett.
Tom: I love how we sell shoes. I love how we sell them in twos, it's so... Noah's Ark!

Tom: She cursed me. She said in this creepy little voice, a man's character is his destiny...
Lois: Oh... She's a wise witch. She casts her spells in proverbs.

Amanda: That's impossible.
Tom: Why's that?
Amanda: One good sexual thought takes at least 20 minutes.

Tom: Very bold plate selection, I might add. Explains the outlift.
Amanda: To eliminate a necklace would've taken another half hour.
Tom: I see.
Amanda: Doesn't look like it takes you very long.
Tom: Touché. I do seem to come out of the shower fully dressed in a blue suit.


  • A bewitching romance.
  • Magic opened up their hearts... Love did the rest.


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