Sixteen Candles is a 1984 comedy about a young girl's "sweet sixteenth" birthday that becomes anything but special as she suffers from every embarrassment possible. The film is often credited with the beginning of the Brat Pack film movement.
- Written and directed by John Hughes.
- I can't believe this. They fucking forgot my birthday.
- Donger's here for five hours, and he's got somebody. I live here my whole life and I'm like a disease.
- Wease, we've got seventy dollars and a pair of girl's underpants. We're safe as kittens.
Long Duk Dong
- No more yankie my wankie. The Donger need food!
- Oh, sexy girlfriend!
- What's happenin' hot stuff?
- Lake (laughing). Big lake.
- Ginny: Darling, is something bothering you? You're really acting like... an asshole. And I think I know what it is. I think you're jealous that I'm getting married and that I'm getting all the attention.
- Samantha: You know, everybody in this family has just gone totally Outer Limits.
- Ginny: No, Sam, I think you're just being a little selfish and immature.
- Samantha: Oh, yes, that's it. That's exactly it. [storms out]
- Ginny: [to herself] Unbelievable. You make someone a bridesmaid and they shit all over you.
- The Geek: Just answer me one question.
- Samantha: Yes, you're a total fag.
- The Geek: Ha ha ha. That's not the question. (pauses) Am I turning you on?
- Samantha: You know, just now I really felt how much you like me.
- The Geek: You're probably zoning in on my brain waves or something.
- Samantha: Well, not really. I felt it on my leg.
- The Geek: [about Samantha] She's cranked for you. I told her you asked about her, right? The girl freaked. She had a hissy. She thinks you're the cat's meow!
- Jake: Really? She came up to me in the gym tonight. She looked at me like I was a leper.
- The Geek: Girls will do that, Jake. You know? They know that guys are like in perpetual heat, right? They know we shit, and they enjoy pumping us up. It's pure power politics, I'm telling you.
- Jake: I thought she hated my guts.
- The Geek: Games, Jake. Silly torturous games. You know how many times I've gone without lunch because some bitch borrows my lunch money? Any halfway decent girl can rob me - blind! Because I'm too torqued up to say no. It's heinous, I'm telling you.
- Jake: You better not be dicking me around. It'd be a major downer to try and get together with this girl and find out that she really does think I'm a slime.
- The Geek: Jake, would I dick you? Let me put it to you this way: what happens to me if I dick you?
- Jake: Heh, I'd kick your ass.
- The Geek: Right! So why would I lie? But I feel compelled to mention to you, Jake, that if all you want of the girl is a piece of ass, I mean, I'll either do it myself, or get someone bigger than me to kick your ass. I mean, not many girls in contemporary American society today would give their underwear to help a geek like me.
- Jake: I can get a piece of ass anytime I want. Shoot, I've got Caroline in the bedroom right now, passed out cold. I could violate her ten different ways if I wanted to.
- The Geek: [almost chokes on a pretzel] What are you waiting for?
- Jake: I'll make a deal with you. [about Samantha's panties] You let me keep these, I'll let you take Caroline home. But you gotta make sure she gets home, you can't leave her in some parking lot. Okay?
- The Geek: Jake, I'm only a freshman.
- Jake: So, she's so blitzed she won't know the difference.
- The Geek: Jake, I don't have a car.
- Jake: You can take mine.
- The Geek: Jake, I don't have a license.
- Jake: I trust you.
- The Geek: This is your car, Jake?
- Jake: No, this is my dad's car. You said you can't drive a stick.
- The Geek: This is a mother-FUCKI... this is a Rolls Royce, Jake.
- Jake: So?
- The Geek: So? So? I heard the grill alone costs five grand on this. Five grand! Do you have five grand? I don't have five grand.
- Jake: Then don't hit anything.
- The Geek: [incredulous] Ha ha! Don't hit anything.
- The Geek: Jake is your dad a big man, or...?
- Jake: Oh, about 6'4".
- The Geek: Very nice.
- Caroline: We're in the parking lot next to my church
- The Geek: You own a church?
- It's the time of your life that may last a lifetime.
- When you're just sixteen anything can happen!
- Molly Ringwald - Samantha Baker
- Michael Schoeffling - Jake Ryan
- Haviland Morris - Caroline Mulford
- Gedde Watanabe - Long Duk Dong
- Anthony Michael Hall - The Geek
- Justin Henry - Mike Baker
- Paul Dooley - Jim Baker
- Carlin Glynn - Brenda Baker
- Blanche Baker - Ginny Baker
- Edward Andrews - Howard Baker
- Billie Bird - Dorothy Baker
- Carole Cook - Grandma Helen
- Max Showalter - Grandpa Fred
- Liane Alexandra Curtis - Randy
- John Cusack - Bryce
- Deborah Pollack - Marlene, aka "Lumberjack"
- Darren Harris - Cliff
- Joan Cusack - Geek Girl #1
- Brian Doyle-Murray - Reverend at Wedding
- Jami Gertz - Robin
- John Kapelos - Rudy Ryszczyk
- Zelda Rubinstein - Organist