So What Now?

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So What Now? was a television sitcom broadcast in 2001 starring Lee Evans as himself.

Dialogue[edit]

This is the best quote from "So What Now?" It features Lee Evans and his best friend Stuart Ponder. They are trying to recollect back to when he can remember last having the ring that he was going to give his wife.

  • (in the kitchen)

Stuart: Now then, ring boy. Where exactly do you last remember having it?

  • Lee: If I knew exactly, I wouldn't have to look, would I?
  • Stuart: God, you're so ungrateful, aren't you? I'm sat here, knocking my pipe out. Now, let's work back through everything that happened.
  • Lee: Right, that's a good idea.
  • Stuart: Yes.
  • Lee: Yeah, I was over by the case, went over by the door. You said, "Where exactly did you have it last?" Worked back through what happened, then I tried to remember. Then, after that, it's a blank.
  • Stuart: I meant before all of that, you twod.
  • Lee: Well, before all that we came out of the lounge.


  • (on leaving the kitchen and entering the sitting room)

Lee: Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes, in here. Yes, in here, through there. Yeah.

  • Stuart: Exhausted, exhausted, exhausted.
  • Lee (as Heather): I'm going shopping!
  • Lee (as himself): Aggravated hernia! Yes.
  • Lee (as Heather): He'd rather listen to me.
  • Both (as Lee): Eileen! Eileen!
  • Stuart: He's all ears. Ha-ha!
  • Both (as Heather): Left, left, left, left, left, left. Right, right, right, right, right, right. Left, left, left, left, Left, left.
  • Stuart (as Heather): That's not important.
  • Lee (as himself): I've got you out of the bath.
  • Lee: No more heavy objects, doctor reckons.
  • Both (as Heather): Madonna, cheesecake, Feng Shui, she quipped.
  • Lee: What is she talking about, the daft mare? Put her on the phone.
  • Both (as Heather): Poor, poor, bank manager, got no friends.
  • Stuart (as Heather): Bills. Bills.
  • Lee (as Heather): Invitations spewing out of my letterbox.
  • Both (as Heather: Rent Day! Rent Day!
  • Lee (as Heather): Good boy!
  • Stuart (as himself: And here's mine.
  • Lee: (as himself): Hey!
  • Lee (as Heather): Poor, poor, doctor, doctor. Can't pay no bills.
  • Stuart (as Heather): Worry, worry, worry, worry, worry, worry.
  • Lee: Upset. Upset. I'm all upset. I'm upset.
  • Stuart (as himself): Did they pay you?
  • Lee (as himself): Yes. Fifty quid, golf sign, sold it.
  • Both: A-a-a-a-a-a-nd ring. Sofa!