Unemployment Clerk: Ah yes, August Gorman. Have you looked for work this week, Mr. Gorman?
Gus Gorman: Yeah.
Unemployment Clerk: What kind?
Gus Gorman: Kitchen... technician.
Unemployment Clerk: Dishwasher? Any luck?
Gus Gorman: Nope. But -
Unemployment Clerk: Mr. Gorman, according to our records you have been unemployed for thirty-six weeks.
Gus Gorman: Thirty-five.
Unemployment Clerk: Not counting this week. [looks through his file] You secured employment last June as a messenger and were discharged after one day for -
Gus Gorman: They said I lost it on the subway, but it ain't the truth! It was a pickpocket took it!
Unemployment Clerk: A television set?
Gus Gorman: It was one of them little insy-bitty two-inch screen Japanese jobs.
Unemployment Clerk: The only other employment you found was in a fast-food joint which lasted... twenty-eight minutes? Well, that's some kind of record. Talk about fast.
Gus Gorman: You know they 'spect you to learn all that on the first day? "Hold the pickle! Hold the lettuce! Extra onions! Special sauce! No special sauce!" Ain't nobody found no meat inside that glop yet.
Unemployment Clerk: Mr. Gorman, the city of Metropolis is generous to a fault, but thirty-six weeks of chronic unemployment, thirty-six weeks of living off the taxes of hard-working citizens. Do you know what you are?
Gus Gorman: Don't call me a bum! I ain't no bum!
Unemployment Clerk: You are, I was about to say, no longer eligible.
Gus Gorman: Hey brother, got a light?
Black Man: Sure.
Hands Gus a matchbook, which has a unique advertisement
Matchbook: Need money? Learn about computers today!
Perry White: I don't understand you, Olsen. A boring banquet and you bring me three thousand boring pictures. Yet Superman saves a man from drowning on 3rd Avenue this morning while you stand there watching the whole thing and you don't even bring me one picture.
Jimmy Olsen: Chief, I didn't have my camera with me.
Perry White: A photographer eats with his camera. A photographer sleeps with his camera.
Lois Lane: I'm glad I'm a writer.
Perry White: I don't have to tell you, it isn't easy for me to lose one of my best reporters.
Clark Kent: Oh, that's okay.
Perry White: But you deserve the vacation, Lois.
Jimmy Olsen: Clark, I want you to keep these people distracted so they don't know what I'm doing.
Clark Kent: What are you doing?
Jimmy Olsen: What am I doing? Remember what the chief said? A photographer always goes after a story.
Clark Kent: That could be dangerous, Jimmy.
Jimmy Olsen: Danger? Goes with the territory, Mister Kent.
Ross Webster: Gus, thanks to you, every time a drunk sobers up he will drinking a cup of Webster Coffee!
Vera Webster: Bad news Ross. Superman was able to save the Columbian crops by diverting the storm.
Lorelei Ambrosia: Ross dear, do not get angry! Besides, coffee is only what people drink to start their day at work. What do they use to get to work?
Ross Webster: Oil! Yes, cornering the market on oil would be much better! Gus, use the computer to send out coordinates to divert all tankers to the middle of the Atlantic Ocean!
Gus Gorman: That is possible?
Ross Webster: Oh sure! Computers direct oil tankers today.
Vera Webster: Then why is there a captain?
Ross Webster: Some old maritime custom they cannot stand to abolish.
Tanker: British Reliance.
First Mate: Skipper, I got another fax. The computer is directing us to these coordinates. But that is right above...the Hypeborean Basin? Why in the world would it direct us there?
Captain: I do not care what any computer says. Our orders are crystal clear: Deliver this shipment of oil to Metropolis, and that is what we are going to do!
Gus Gorman: [to Superman] Hey, man!
Lorelei Ambrosia: That's his last name. He likes to be called Superman.
Lorelie Ambrosia: Hi, honey.
Superman: I'm sorry. I don't know you, lady.
Lorelie Ambrosia: [sad] But last night...
Superman: I'm sorry, that wasn't me. That man is gone.
Ross Webster: You're going down in history as the man who killed Superman.