Sweet Home Alabama

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Sweet Home Alabama is a 2002 film about a young woman, who ran away from her husband in Alabama and reinvented herself as a New York socialite, as she returns to Alabama to finalize her divorce so that she can remarry.

Directed by Andy Tennant. Written by C. Jay Cox
Sometimes What You're Looking for Is Right Where You Left It.(taglines)

Melanie Smooter/Carmichael

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  • Like I could tip a cow BY MYSELF!
  • [to Lurlynn] Look at you, you have a baby... In a bar. [Lurlynn: Hell, I got 3 more at home! This one’s still on the tit, so I can cart him anywhere.]
  • You dumb stubborn redneck hick.
  • Well, you must be Jake's hot date. I'm Melanie, Jake's snotty Yankee bitch wife whom he refuses to divorce even though I'm engaged to another man.
  • [Drunk, at the bar] Oh Bobby Ray....why don't you just go to a gay bar. [Eldon: What would B-Ray do at a gay bar?]
  • The truth is I gave my heart away a long time ago, my whole heart, and I never really got it back.
  • You're the first boy I ever kissed, Jake, and I want you to be the last.
  • [After punching Kate] Nobody talks to my mama like that! [Earl Smooter: Praise the Lord, the South has risen again!]
  • [On seeing her father in his Confederate uniform] Christ Almighty, Daddy, how am I gonna explain you in New York?
  • [Seeing her father in his Confederate uniform, leaving to go to 'battle'] "People need a passport to come down here."
  • Well for starters, you can get your stubborn ass down here and give me a divorce.
  • [after leaving Andrew at the altar as a thunderstorm is approaching] Hey, y'all! If your friends of the bride, stick around! I'm gonna go find me a groom!
  • [final line] Hey, Stella! Make it a slow one.

Jake Perry

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  • [about the divorce papers Melanie wants him to sign] The only reason I ain't signin’ is cause you've turned into some hoity toity Yankee bitch and I'd like nothin’ better right now than to piss you off.
  • Honey, just 'cause I talk slow don't mean I'm stupid.
  • [after looking at divorce papers] I better have my lawyer take a look at these. I'm just a simple country boy. There's all kinds of big words in here I can't even pronounce. Hell, you might be takin' me to the cleaners for all I know. [Melanie: The cleaners—you?]
  • Since when does it have to be one or the other? You can have roots and wings, Mel.
  • Nobody finds their soul mate when they're ten. I mean, where's the fun in that, right?

Mayor Kate Hennings

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  • Why don't you go back to your double-wide and fry something?
  • What ever happened to responsible journalism?
  • There is nothing wrong with poor people. I get elected by poor people.
  • [after Melanie tells Andrew that she still loves Jake at the wedding] I've never met anyone so manipulative, so deceitful...and I'm in politics.

Bobby Ray

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  • [to Melanie] Woo-oo. You look like sex on a stick in that Frederick Montana getup.
  • You can take the girl out of the honky tonk, but you can't take the honky tonk out of the girl.
  • We weren't aimin' for ya, but I doubt I woulda gone to your funeral.
  • Well, aren't you just a big fat liar?
  • [about a pair of handcuffs] Might wanna save those for the honeymoon! [laughs with Frederick Montana before exchanging a look]

Earl Smooter

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  • You can't ride two horses with one ass, sugarbean.
  • [to Kate] Careful, you just smashed the state bird of Alabama.
  • Well even if he is a Yankee, at least he's sober.
  • [after Melanie punches Kate] Praise the Lord, the South has risen again!

Others

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  • Andrew: You married your cousin?
  • Pearl: How many times does your only daughter get married? [awkward pause] Well, other than the other time.

Dialogue

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Young Melanie: What do you wanna marry me for anyhow?
Young Jake: So I can kiss you anytime I want.

Melanie: [on her cell phone] I can't. I'm in Alabama.
Tabatha Wadmore-Smith: [in New York] Oh... my God.

Jake: [not recognizing Melanie in her sunglasses] Can I help you?
Melanie: Well, for starters, you can get your stubborn ass down here and give me a divorce.
Jake: You're shittin' me right?
Melanie: I've never actually understood that expression, but no, I am not shitting you.

Jake: Well, how about "Hey there Jake, lookin' good. How's the family?"
Melanie: You expect me to say that you look good? What'd, they run out of soap at the Piggly Wiggly since I left?

Melanie: And don't even pretend like you missed me.
Jake: Oh, I missed you all right, but at this range, my aim is bound to improve.

Jake: [opens the fridge to discover Melanie replaced his beer with Bud Light] What the hell is this? Chick food?
Melanie: Light beer. Less calories.

Melanie: What are you doing?
Jake: Leavin’, you done it, you should recognize the gesture.

Jake: Whatever blows your dress up, darlin'. You go right ahead and spend your money.
Melanie: Oh, but darlin', I thought you said we should think of it as "our money." [Jake stops cold] Just a guess: The words joint checking are flashing in your head right now.

[Jake is getting ready to go to the beach to place the lightning rods]
Stella: You know, for someone who’s been holdin’ onto somethin’ for so long, you're pretty quick to let it go.
Jake: I can't control her, any more than I can control the weather.

Bobby Ray: Now, what'd I ever do to you?
Melanie: [drunk] Oh, you didn't do anything to me, darlin'... or any other girl in town!

Lurlynn: You know he went up there?
Melanie: Who? Jake?
Lurlynn: I'm not supposed to know, but Clinton let it slip once.
Melanie: When?
Lurlynn: About a year after you left. He told Clinton he'd never seen anything like it. He knew that it would take more than an apology to get you back. He'd have to conquer the world first. He's been trying ever since.
Melanie: [realizing] That's why he kept sending the papers back.

Lurlynn: It's funny how things don't turn out...
Melanie: ...It's funny how they do.

Melanie: Bobby Ray, it's not like that.
Bobby Ray: [visibly hurt] No, I'll tell you what it's not like. It's not like Jake's the only one you run out on.

Jake: Anybody think of anything in here that, uh, might bother Bobby Ray?
Wade: Uh, Clinton's breath.
Jake: You still the same Bobby Ray from last night?
Bobby Ray: Last time I checked, yeah.
Jake: [puts arm on shoulder] Well, then, let me buy you a drink.
Bobby Ray: Well, you're really not my type... [laughter]

Jake: C'mon, I wanna show you somethin’.
Melanie: I can't.
Jake: Can't? Or won't?
Melanie: Both.
Jake: The girl I knew used to be fearless.
Melanie: The girl you knew didn't have a life.
Jake: Guess you better get on with it then.

Mayor Kate Hennings: You're just gonna let her humiliate you... with some bullshit about an old husband?!
Andrew: Yeah, I think I am. Excuse me.

Melanie: Now what kind of wife would I be if I didn't pick up after my husband?
Jake: The kind that don't live here.

Taglines

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  • Sometimes What You're Looking for Is Right Where You Left It.
  • Fall... in love.

Cast

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