TISM (1982–present) are a band from Melbourne, Australia with an irreverent attitude towards the music industry; all members are known by deliberately-outrageous pseudonyms.
- The rich kid becomes a junkie,
The poor kid, an advertiser.
What a tragic waste of potential.
Being a junkie's not so good either.
- Hardwired into everyone's head is the person they're gonna be.
Growing up's not a matter of choice, it's a matter of wait and see.
- I'm on the drug! I'm on the drug! I'm on the drug that killed River Phoenix!
- Ron Hitler-Barassi: They've talked about the death of the novel and they've talked about the fact that art in Australia is spiralling downward and I think TISM on Review is confirming that fact. You know, like, for 10 years, Review viewers, we've been slagging you lot off. I know you're expecting some pencil-neck geek with short cropped blonde hair and a black polo necked sweater and drinking his latté talking about some crappy artist that's getting my taxes for years and years and here you have TISM the sort of artists for people who aren't creative, you know. We're from the solidly middle class. We're the artists for people who went to government schools, you know. So I'd like all you Review listeners to put down your latté's and turn up your home stereos and your 48 inch colour TV and get a taste of real life instead of sitting back on your black spotty behind, taking my taxes and thinking you're so creative. Don't you agree, Humphrey?
- Humphrey B. Flaubert: Oh, I agree with everything you said, except for every third word.
- TISM host art show Review on ABC Television, Australia. October 31, 1996.
- Humphrey B. Flaubert: I would like to say, to all the people of Australia: "Kick me - I'm different."
- Before a performance at the Big Day Out.
- Humphrey B. Flaubert: I’m certainly always proud of everything we do. It’s sort of like when I’m proud of my poo. I look down on it and think "that’s well-formed, that means I’m healthy.
- During an interview with FasterLouder, July 12, 2004.