Talk:Bob Hope

From Wikiquote
Jump to navigation Jump to search


  • A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.
  • As soon as the war ended, we located the one spot on earth that hadn't been touched by the war and blew it to hell.
  • Drugs are very much a part of professional sports today, but when you think about it, golf is the only sport where the players aren't penalized for being on grass.
  • I do benefits for all religions - I'd hate to blow the hereafter on a technicality.
  • If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf.
  • I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance -waiting for the bathroom.
  • I love to go to Washington, if only to be nearer my money.
  • I'm so old they've cancelled my blood type.
  • Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle.
  • My father told me all about the birds and the bees, the liar - I went steady with a woodpecker till I was twenty-one.
  • People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.
  • When they asked Jack Benny to do something for the Actor's Orphanage - he shot both his parents and moved in.
  • You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
  • Zsa Zsa Gabor got married as a one-off, and it was so successful she turned it into a series.
  • I was born in England, but left as soon as I realized I wouldn't be King