Talk:Dan Rather

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  • Americans will put up with anything provided it doesn't block traffic.
  • An intellectual snob is someone who can listen to the "William Tell Overture" and not think of "The Lone Ranger."
    • Wikipedia
  • I leave CBS News with tremendous memories. But I leave now most of all with the desire to once again do regular, meaningful reporting. My departure before the term of my contract represents CBS's final acknowledgement, after a protracted struggle, that they had not lived up to their obligation to allow me to do substantive work there. As for their offers of a future with only an office but no assignments, it just isn't in me to sit around doing nothing. So I will do the work I love elsewhere, and I look forward to sharing details about that soon.
    • CBS Evening News
  • One good thing about having a birthday on Halloween is that people tend to remember it.
    • Readers Digest, Quotable Quotes
  • Ratings don't last. Good journalism does.
  • The difference between love and sex is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.
  • The press is a watchdog. Not an attack dog. Not a lapdog. A watchdog.
  • I got addicted. News, particularly daily news, is more addictive than crack cocaine, more addictive than heroin, more addictive than cigarettes.

The 1984 US president election[edit]

  • Walter Mondale has seen the light at the end of the tunnel - and it's out.

The 1988 US president election[edit]

  • George Bush is sweeping through the South like a tornado through a trailer park.

The 1992 US president election[edit]

  • The excitement is so great that it can "make the wax pop out of your ears if you love politics."
  • Texas is "the big enchilada or, if not an enchilada, then a huge taco."

The 1996 US president election[edit]

  • Discussion about poll showing Bill Clinton would have lost to Colin Powell: "Woulda, coulda, shoulda. If a frog didn't have long hind legs, he wouldn't have squat to jump with."

The 2000 US president election[edit]

  • This race is shakier than cafeteria Jello.
  • He swept through the South like a tornado through a trailer park.
  • Don't bet the trailer money on it yet.
  • It's a ding dong battle back and forth.
  • Look at that. Can't get a cigarette paper between'em.
  • His chances are slim right now and if he doesn't carry Florida, Slim will have left town.
  • We said earlier in the evening at one point that Governor Bush would probably be as mad as a rained-on rooster.
  • This will show you how tight it is - it's spandex tight.
  • The polls have been veering and wobbling so much that neither NASA nor the Russian Cosmodrome could track 'em in some cases.
  • If you're disgusted with us, frankly I don't blame ya.
  • I think you would likelier see a hippopotamus run through this room than see George Bush appoint Ralph Nader to the Cabinet.
  • Turn the lights down, the party just got wilder.
  • It's cardiac-arrest time in this presidential campaign.
  • It's too early to say he has the whip hand.
  • It's about as complicated as a wiring diagram to some dynamo.
  • This election swings like one of those pendulum things.
  • Al Gore has his back to the wall, shirt tails on fire with this race in Florida.
  • Smelling salts for all Democrats please.
  • This race is tight like a too-small bathing suit on a too-long ride home from the beach.
  • We've lived by the crystal ball and learned to eat so much broken glass tonight that we're in critical condition.
  • You would sooner find a tall talking broccoli stick to offer to mow your lawn for free.
  • The big burrito.
  • This thing is as tight as the rusted lugnuts on a '55 Ford.
  • Maybe you can bring some perspective on this, we're plum out.
  • When the going gets weird, anchor men punt.

The 2004 US presidential election[edit]

  • Let's hit these biscuits with another dab of gravy (referring to voting results so far)
  • This is more complicated than the wiring diagram for some hydroelectric dam dynamo.
  • If a frog had side pockets, he'd carry a handgun.
  • Don't taunt the alligator before you've crossed the creek.
  • Missouri, the Show-Me State; show me … insufficient data!
  • George Bush, he’s got the hot dice right now.
  • It won’t mean a thing if they don’t get those swing … states!
  • The results are swinging like Count Basie.
  • Only a vote talks; everything else walks.
  • In Southern states, they beat him like a rented mule.
  • We’re all on these returns like white on rice.
  • To err is human, but to really foul up requires a computer.
  • If you try to read the tea leaves before the cup is done, you can get yourself burned.
  • This race is hotter than a Times Square Rolex.
  • When it comes to a race like this, I'm a long-distance runner and an all-day hunter.
  • Turn the lights down, the party just got wilder.
  • We don't know what to do. We don't know whether to wind a watch or bark at the moon.
  • John Kerry’s at the point when he’s got his back to the wall, shirttails on fire, and the bill collector at the door.
  • The situation in Ohio would give aspirin a headache.

The 2006 US Midterm Elections[edit]

From Comedy Central's 2006 Daily Show / Colbert Report Midterm Midtacular on November 7th, 2006:

  • Ran away with it like a hobo with a sweet potato pie.
  • If you ain't got the yolk, you can't emulsify the hollandaise.
  • If you don't eat your meat, you can't have any pudding. How can you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat?
  • Mouth is alive with juices like wine, and I'm hungry like the wolf.