Wikiquote no longer allows unsourced quotations, and they are in process of being removed from our pages (see Wikiquote:Limits on quotations); but if you can provide a reliable, precise and verifiable source for any quote on this list please move it to Peter Cook. --Antiquary 18:39, 3 June 2009 (UTC)
- I've learned from my mistakes and I'm sure I can repeat them exactly.
- I think I ran out of ambition at 24... Indolent. I see nothing wrong with that.
- I went to the University of Life and was chucked out.
- My biggest regret in life is saving David Frost from drowning.
- He is also reported to have called Frost "the bubonic plagiarist".
- Playing rugby at school I once fell on a loose ball and, through ignorance and fear, held on despite a fierce pummelling. After that it took me months to convince my team-mates I was a coward.
- The most ordinary thing like appearing on Clive James fills me with panic, I don't much enjoy being on television. I'd rather be sarcastic to myself. I'd rather do it for a few people socially, but it would be a bit rude to take up a collection after dinner.
- There's terrific merit in having no sense of humour, no sense of irony, practically no sense of anything at all. If you're born with these so-called defects you have a very good chance of getting to the top.
- Tragically I was an only twin.