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  • Age is a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it don't matter.
    • Variant: Age is a question of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
  • * Airplanes may kill you, but they ain't likely to hurt you.
  • How old would you be if you didn't know how old you were?
    • Variant: How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?
    • Variant: How old would you be if you didn't know how old you was?
  • I ain't ever had a job, I just always played baseball.
    • Variant: I never had a job. I always played baseball.
  • I don't generally like running. I believe in training by rising gently up and down from the bench.
  • I may not be the bestest pitcher in the world, but I sure out-cutes 'em.
  • I never rush myself. See, they can't start the game without me.
  • I use my single windup, my double windup, my triple windup, my hesitation windup, my no windup. I also use my step-n-pitch-it, my submariner, my sidearmer, and my bat dodger. Man's got to do what he's got to do.
  • I've said it once and I'll say it a a hundred times, I'm forty-four years old.
  • If a man can beat you, walk him.
  • It's funny what a few no-hitters do for a body.
  • It's not what you don't know that hurts you. It's what you know that just ain't so. (usually attributed to Mark Twain)
  • Just take the ball and throw it where you want to. Throw strikes. Home plate don’t move.
  • Money and women. They're two of the strongest things in the world. The things you do for a woman you wouldn't do for anything else. Same with money.
  • Mother always told me, if you tell a lie, always rehearse it. If it don't sound good to you, it won't sound good to no one else.
  • My feet ain't got nothing to do with my nickname, but when folks get it in their heads that a feller's got big feet, soon the feet start looking big.
  • My pitching philosophy is simple; you gotta keep the ball off the fat part of the bat.
    • My pitching philosophy is simple— keep the ball way from the bat.
  • Never be unfaithful to a lover, except with your wife.
  • One time I snuck a ball on with me and when I went to winding up, I threw one of them balls to first and one to second. I was so smooth I picked off both runners and fanned the batter without that ump or the other team even knowing it.
  • The only change is that baseball has turned Paige from a second class citizen to a second class immortal.
  • There never was a man on Earth who pitched as much as me. But the more I pitched, the stronger my arm would get.


  • When a batter swings and I see his knees move, I can tell just what his weaknesses are then I just put the ball where I know he can't hit it.
  • Work like you don't need the money. Love like you've never been hurt. Dance like nobody's watching.
  • You win a few, you lose a few. Some get rained out. But you got to dress for all of them.
  • [When a batter remarked that he didn't know Satchel still had the fastball] That wasn't my fastball, that was my hurry-up pitch. And it got by you.
  • [When a batter said Satchel's fastball looked like a golf ball going past him] You must be talking about my slow ball. My fastball looks like a fish egg.