The Great Race

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The Great Race is a 1965 film about a popular daredevil who proposes an automobile race across three continents, his arch rival who vows to beat him, and an ambitious female reporter who has her own plans for victory.

Directed by Blake Edwards. Written by Blake Edwards and Arthur A. Ross.

Professor Fate[edit]

  • [covered in feathers after crashing during a stunt] I'd like to see the Great Leslie try THAT one!"
  • [after crash landing into a mud puddle in the farm during a stunt] Well, there's another one, Leslie can try on for size.
  • Push the button, Max! [on numerous occasions.]
  • [to Maggie, after Maggie accidentally destroy his garage while confronting the dogs] A pox on you!
  • [the men of the Sheriff of Boracho wearing indian hats are approaching them from behind believing they are going to attack him] Smokescreen Max! Give them the smokescreen! No, you idiot! The smokescreen! Push the button, Max!
  • Thieves, brigands and cut-throats of all nations may hound us... but we are ready for them... we shall blast them into Kingdom Come.
  • [to Leslie, after Leslie allows him to win the race due to him proving his love for Maggie Dubois rather than beating him] I hate you! You, I hate! You, whose clothes are always white, and whose hair is always combed, and whose car is always clean! I refuse to accept! I challenge you to another race!

Prince Hapnik[edit]

  • [after getting a pie in the face] Ulp? Brandy? Hah-hah, throw more brandy! Throw brandy! More Brandy! [gets a second pie in the face] Rum! I never mix my pies. I want to play, too.
  • [after throwing a pie at General Kuhster] You! You're the cause of it all! It was your idea!
  • [throwing flour at General Kuhster] I don't care! I don't care! You're banished! I'm getting an new tucker-inner. Banished, banished, banished!

The Great Leslie[edit]

  • [to Maggie DuBois] You talk a good fight, but when it comes down to it, you're as emancipated as a confirmed spinster in a knitting bee.


Lily Olay: I ain't no native, I was born here!
Texas Jack: NOW can I have me some fightin' room?! [several times during a saloon fight]
Baron von Stuppe: As a very wise English gentleman once said, 'He who fights and runs away may live to fight another day'. So, until another day, Mr. Leslie, please excuse me, I have a boat waiting!


Professor Fate: My apologies, there's a polar bear in our car.
The Great Leslie: If you don't leave this car immediately, I shall personally feed you to the bear.

Professor Fate: Genius, Max, positive genius! What's next?
Max: Car number 5, the engine falls out!
Professor Fate: Car number 5, hah hah hah hah! Uh Max... we're number 5.

Max: Professor, Where are you?
Professor Fate: Behind the rock!
Max: Behind which rock? [falls over the professor]
Professor Fate: This rock you idiot!

The Great Leslie: [measuring the iceberg] Thirty seven inches to go.
Professor Fate: Oh, 37 inches to go. Huzzah! At the rate we've been melting, that's good for about one more week!
The Great Leslie: You'd better keep it to yourself.
Professor Fate: Oh, of course I'll keep it to myself. Until the water reaches my lower lip, and then I'm gonna mention it to SOMEBODY!

Professor Fate: Escaped?
General Kushter: With a small friar.
Professor Fate: Leslie escaped with a chicken?


  • The movie with 20,000-mile or one-million-laughs guarantee!


External links[edit]

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