The Sifl and Olly Show

The Sifl and Olly Show (1998-1999) was a sock puppet show created by Liam Lynch and shown on MTV. The show stars a black sock puppet named Sifl with grass for hair, a white sock puppet named Olly with a flower on the top, and a yellow sock puppet named Chester that looks like a dog.

Olly

• Now folks, here's a nightmare scenario. You're cuddled up in bed, you hear that "step, thump, step, thump" of a pirate coming up your stairs. You'd hide under your covers. But, it's not going to do you any good. He's drank your liquor, number one. Number two... He's looking for treasure. He's a pirate folks, you're DEAD.

• I'm standing here in the middle of, hell, I dunno where I was at this point, with like, six cartons of eggs, and all this guy can say is "him go up the cricker." What the hell is that?

Dialogue

Olly: Next caller.

Caller: I think these Squirrel Zappers are so inhumane.

Olly: My friend, what about electric dog fences? What about the fact that squirrels are responsible for 70% of all deaths?

Caller: No, they're not.

Olly: But they are. They are actually.

Sifl: Yeah, I've had serious problems with squirrels.

Olly: Why would we be lying if we were on television?

---

Jargon Scott: Hi, I'm Jargon Scott.

Sifl: Uh oh...

Olly: Hi, Jargon, what's your question?

Jargon Scott: Well, I was gonna ask you boys if you'd be interested in, uh, purchasing a little item I've got here.

Olly: Not legless dogs...

Jargon Scott: Today I am offering legless dogs.

Olly: No, I'm sorry, we're not interested.

Jargon Scott: Now listen, hear me out... You never have to walk 'em.

Olly: Oh gosh...

Jargon Scott: They're like cuddly throw pillows.

Olly: No, look, we just...

Jargon Scott: Like cats with personality.

Olly: We just can't really...

Jargon Scott: They never run away.

Sifl: True, but...

Jargon Scott: They're safe around children. What do you guys say?

Sifl: No, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, we're not interested, sir.

Jargon Scott: Hear me out buddy.

---

Olly: Do you know the language of love?

Chester: Yeah, it's like...

Olly: How's it go?

Chester: Sure, "Hey fruity lips... come on, come on home with me sugar butt."

Olly: Sugar Butt?

Chester: Yeah.

Olly: You called a girl "Sugar Butt"?

Chester: Yeah, and I keep cereal in my pocket, to feed them.

External links

• The Sifl & Olly Show quotes at the Internet Movie Database