The Tuxedo

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The Tuxedo is a 2002 American comedy-action film directed by Kevin Donovan and starring Jackie Chan and Jennifer Love Hewitt.


  • That's definitely not a rental.
  • The name's Tong, James Tong.
  • When I look at you, I have a wet dream.


  • Never touch my tuxedo.
  • Jimmy, I hate to say this. But don't take advice from women about women.


  • You're helping me out by being a guinea pig for a new product.
  • We at Banning Springs have developed a new filtration process that would protect your assets against the biological holocaust that's coming.


Winton: Life's a bitch.
Del: He didn't drown, if that makes life any less bitchy.

Jimmy: You are very smart. Good speller.
Cheryl: Thanks, I graduated top two-thirds of my sixth grade class.

[Del walks limp after being flipped incidentally by Jimmy.]

Del: Get some rest and medication!
Jimmy: What?
Del: We'll be in communication!

[Del turns her car engine on, and drives away]

Jimmy: But I don't have your phone number!

[Jimmy tries on the Tuxedo.]

TUX: Welcome to the Tactical Uniform Experiment. Tuxedo recognizing new user. Mapping user's neurological structure. Activate wristwatch for desired function.
Jimmy: Demo... Okay, show me.

[Jimmy Set the Tuxedo to Demolition Mode.]

Jimmy: Uh Oh!
TUX: Caution... Demolition mode. The Tuxedo will consider any object a target and act to destroy it.
Jimmy: Oh, what's happening?
TUX: Exit the demolition mode immediately.
Lundeen: What's in.. Salt?.. [heart beating in the dropping cup water on floor]


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