WWE SmackDown!

From Wikiquote
Jump to navigation Jump to search

WWE SmackDown is a professional wrestling television program that debuted on April 29, 1999.

2003[edit]

November 20[edit]

Kane: I came here tonight to give a eulogy for my brother, the Undertaker, the man that I buried alive at Survivor Series. But I can't do that. The truth is, the man that we knew as the Undertaker, has been dead for a long time. My brother and I used to share a common bond, we were monsters, we lived to strike fear into the hearts of normal men, THAT was who we were. But my brother, the Undertaker, committed the most unpardonable of all sins: He betrayed himself. He became one of you. I know, I watched as he showed compassion and defended Stephanie McMahon. I watched as he showed weakness in losing to Brock Lesnar. This man was not my brother. This man was not a monster. A monster shows no compassion. A monster has no weaknesses. My brother was nothing but a FRAUD. When I stopped that, I took this impostor, I buried him alive... and I enjoyed it. As I look around all I see is a mass of pathetic insects that I could destroy any time I wanted. [Buhrufe] But at least you people are true your nature. My brother was not. But thanks to me, you will never have to see his pathetic carcass again. This so called 'Deadman' was dead and buried long before Survivor Series. So all I have to say... is rest in peace, my brother. Rest in peace!


2005[edit]

March 10[edit]

JBL: Every single week! Every single week, we have done something so freakin' awesome that we have to come out here and let you relish in our greatness! And this week is certainly no different. I never get tired of this. This week, we're gonna celebrate a man who exemplifies what the Cabinet stands for: greatness, dignity, courage, respect. A man who, last week, single handedly, by himself, one-on-one, mano y mano destroyed John Cena! That man is your United States Champion, the greatest athlete in SmackDown! history, Mr. Orlando Jordan!
Crowd: [chanting] CENA!
Michael Cole: The "Cena" chants begin.
JBL: I understand. Virginia is a little backward, but you're chanting for the loser. Chant the winner's name: O.J. You see, because there's a lot about O.J. you don't know. O.J. grew up with many brothers and many sisters; O.J. grew up in the inner city; O.J. realized at a young age that he could be like you people out here, and that he could be paying to see me. O.J. didn't want that, so he did the right thing. He turned his back on his family, he turned his back on his inner city. He wanted greatness in his life, and here he stands right now, your United States Champion, with you people out there, him in here! And tonight, you will see that greatness has no bounds. Tonight, you will see all of the gold come to the Cabinet.
You see, I'm a wrestling god, and gods must be adorned with gold. So tonight, Rey Mysterio, you and Eddie Guerrero... Tonight, you will face the Cabinet. And tonight, you will see why we are successful and you are not, because we hold ourselves to a standard that you cannot possibly fathom! We hold ourselves to a standard that is so high, most of you never see it. Tonight, you will realize what is class and what is not, and why common people never stand here with championships.
[Turns to Orlando Jordan] What is that thing you're carrying?
Orlando Jordan: Why, JBL, I believe this is what John Cena used to call [spins the plate on the belt] his United States Championship title.
JBL: Looks to me like some little bling-bling sideshow, like a hubcap that these kids, instead of putting money into their education, put on their cars. That, I find disgusting. That, for the time-honored tradition of sports-entertainment, must be destroyed. The Bashams, the Secretaries of Defense, would you please do me a favor and get the trash can and the stairs, please?
[The Bashams bring the top half of the ringside steps into the ring and place a trash can in front of it]
Michael: "Trash can and the stairs"? What's going on?
JBL: You people are about to understand why it is sometimes good for America that the rich keep the common down. That belt right there is everything I find reprehensible, everything I hate about John Cena! He has taken a time-honored tradition like the United States Championship, and he has made it into a sideshow freak ride! For that, that must be destroyed, just like at WrestleMania, John Cena will not only be destroyed, but he will bow at the feet of greatness! John Cena talks about street cred? I own the damn street! [Orlando hands the belt to JBL, who lays it into the trash can and takes a remote from Danny Basham] Just like your career, Cena...[JBL turns one switch on the remote] up...in...smoke.
[He turns the second switch, which triggers an explosion inside the trash can]
Michael: You've gotta be kidding me. Cena's championship was in there.
JBL: Orlando, that piece of trash was destroyed. I had something flown in from WWE Headquarters, the WWE Vault, worthy of you. [Doug Basham holds out a briefcase, which JBL opens and takes out the traditional United States Championship] Ladies and gentlemen, to a great American. To a man with class, something with class. The greatest athlete in SmackDown! history. [He hands the title over to Orlando] Give it up for Orlando Jordan, your United States Champion! [Orlando and JBL stand on the steps hoisting their respective titles high] Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you your United States Champion, Orlando Jordan; your future Tag Team Champions; and the WWE Heavyweight Champion, John "Bradshaw" Layfield!

2006[edit]

January 20[edit]

Daivari: Well, I told you what was going to happen out here. You'll be screwed up. But Kurt, I should have said, you were the one that was going to get screwed. I am now the manager of the World's Strongest Man, and the next World Heavyweight Champion, Mark Henry.
Michael Cole: What?
Tazz: What the hell is going on here? Daivari's Henry's manager?
Michael Cole: Oh my God.
Tazz: I never saw this coming. Did Angle get double-crossed here? Is Daivari managing Mark Henry?
Michael Cole: I'd love to know what the hell happened, but the bottom line is that Daivari is managing Mark Henry.

August 4[edit]

[Chavo Guerrero appears.]
Michael Cole: I can't wait to hear this. Nothing this man can say will convince me what he did to Rey Mysterio in the past two weeks was right.
JBL: Where's your objectivity?
Tony Chimel: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome, Chavo Guerrero.
JBL: And why are you surprised? Why does Kasparov play chess? It's in his DNA. It's in Chavo's DNA to be a Guerrero. I've known three generations of Guerreros; you cannot trust a Guerrero. Lie, cheat and steal, remember Michael?
Michael Cole: Oh yeah, I remember. That's the Guerrero motto.
JBL: Don't look down on it.
Michael Cole: Eddie Guerrero made that phrase famous.
JBL: And this is his nephew.
Chavo Guerrero: People want to know why I screwed Rey Mysterio, why I betrayed Rey Mysterio. But first, I want to know: what is betrayal? Is betrayal stealing from another man? Is betrayal stealing his name from him? Stealing his blood? Because that's what Rey Mysterio did to me, did to my whole family, the Guerrero family. What? You don't believe me? You don't believe that Rey Mysterio is a thief? Let me tell you what he stole from me. I grew up with Eddie Guerrero. We were like brothers. We used to lie, cheat, and steal together. When Eddie passed away, we all felt it. We all felt it, we were all devastated. I retired from wrestling, I walked away from wrestling. But did Rey Mysterio? Noooo. He used the Guerrero name, Eddie's name. It seemed like every other match, Rey was dedicating the match to Eddie's memory. Royal Rumble, No Way Out, even at WrestleMania. Every five minutes, he was mentioning Eddie's name, very, very convenient. And when Rey won the World Heavyweight Championship, it got even worse. Rey, you couldn't stand on your own, Rey, you couldn't keep the title on your own. What did you do? You used another Guerrero—me. Rey, I saved you from losing the title to JBL. I saved you from losing the title to Mark Henry. I saved you over and over and over again. But you decided to stand here in the middle of this ring and take all the glory, and use Eddie's spotlight and Eddie's name that all of you chanted to him. At The Great American Bash, I couldn't take it anymore. And that's when I realized that, Rey Mysterio, you didn't just steal Eddie from me, you didn't just steal Eddie from the Guerrero family, you stole the memory of Eddie from each and every one of these people out here, from you [points to one person in the audience], from you [points to another person in the audience]. People ask me why I did what I did. Because Rey Mysterio, you're nothing but a leech, living off the blood of the Guerrero name.
[Rey Mysterio appears. Rey and Chavo fought each other until Vickie Guerrero appears and separates them.]

2007[edit]

November 2[edit]

[Hornswoggle attacks Jonathon Coachman.]
JBL: Referees don't do that.
Michael Cole: Well, when you're a McMahon, you can do whatever you want to do, right?
JBL: Oh, that's a good point.