What About Bob?
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Bob's a special kind of friend. The kind that drives you crazy!
- Bob: Have you ever hear of Tourette's syndrome? Involuntarily shouting profanity?
- Dr. Marvin: It's exceptionally rare.
- Bob: Shit-eating-son-of-a-bitch... bastard, douche-bag, twat, numb-nuts, dickhead, bitch!
- Dr. Marvin: Why exactly are you doing this?
- Bob: If I fake it then I don't have it. You know it's the same with the cardiac arrest.
- Dr. Marvin: Are you married?
- Bob: I'm divorced.
- Dr. Marvin: Would you like to talk about that?
- Bob: There are two types of people in this world: Those who like Neil Diamond, and those who don't. My ex-wife loves him.
- Bob: Baby step on the bus, baby step on the bus...
- Driver: Last bus to Lake Winapinasaukee, Bob!
- Bob: I know Minh, just give me a moment. Baby step to the stairs.
- Driver: Would you be able to board today? We have a "baby" schedule to keep.
- Bob: [to himself] Baby step to 4:00, baby step to 4:00.
- [a customer attempts to use the phone]
- Bob: Sorry, could you wait? I am expecting a call from Dr. Marvin.
- Mr. Guttman: Dr. Marvin? Dr. Leo Marvin?
- Bob: You know him?
- Mr. Guttman: Know him? He bought our dream house!
- Mrs. Guttman: Son of a bitch!
- Mr. Guttman: She never says that.
- Mrs. Guttman: We scrimped and saved for years for a down payment. Then he comes in with a sack full of money and buys the house right under our noses! Stay away from that man.
- Bob: No problem; he will not see me.
- Mr. Guttman: Won't see you, eh? Well, we will show you where he lives.
- Dr. Marvin: You've ruined my life! You've ruined my career! You've ruined my book! You turned a peaceful house into an insane asylum! Get out!
- Anna: Daddy!
- Fay: My god, Leo What's gotten into you?
- Dr. Marvin: It was a disaster, Fay!
- Fay: No, it wasn't. You were wonderful, sweetie.
- Anna: You were fine, dad.
- Siggy: Yeah. Why'd you need to kick Bob out of the House?
- Dr. Marvin: You think he's gone? He's not gone! That's the whole point, He's never gone! [Opens the door]
- Bob: Is this some radical new therapy?
- Dr. Marvin: You see?!
- Siggy: [the Marvins have told Bob to leave, and they are saying farewells] Goodbye, green-puking pissant!
- Bob: Later, barf-breath douche-mouth!
- Siggy: I mean, my dad just dropped me in the water. He let me go with no warning. I mean, I nearly drowned. My whole life passed before my eyes.
- Bob: You're lucky you're only 12.
- Siggy: It was still grim.
- Dr. Marvin: I want some peace, and quiet.
- Bob: I'll be quiet.
- Siggy: I'll be peace.
- Bob's a special kind of friend. The kind that drives you crazy!
- Bill Murray - Bob Wiley
- Richard Dreyfuss - Dr. Leo Marvin
- Julie Hagerty - Fay Marvin
- Charlie Korsmo - Sigmund 'Siggy' Marvin
- Kathryn Erbe - Anna Marvin
- Tom Aldredge - Mr. Guttman
- Susan Willis - Mrs. Guttman