What About Bob?
- I'm sailing!
I'm sailing! I'm sailing! I sail! I'm a sailor! I sail!
- Your death therapy cured me you Genius!!!
- What is this, isolation therapy?
- Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic and so am I.
- I'm sorry about barging in here like this.
- [to man on bus] Hi. I'm Bob. Would you knock me out, please? Just hit me in the face.
- I'm Sailing! I'm Sailing!
- Why don't I start.
- New Hampshire?
- I feel good, I feel great, I feel wonderful. I feel good, I feel great, I feel wonderful.
- Good morning Gill... I said good morning, Gill.
- A vacation from my problems! You bet I will!
- Oh, no no no! That was not smart! That was not smart!
- The simplest way to put it: I have problems.
- I have a real big problem, moving.
- Are you sure I'm not imposing?
- It just makes my lips numb to think about it.
- Baby step to the elevator. I'm in the elevator. AHHHHH!!!
- [singing] I walk through the kitchen, with a bowl full of chicken, and I'm putting it in Fay & Leo, I mean Dr. Marvin's, refrigerator for the night.
- Is this a bad time? Oh... the fam!
- [after Leo throws him out enraged] Is this some radical new therapy?
- So the Psychatrist has a patient. He draws a circle and says, "what do you think of when ypu see this?" He says "Sex". [the staff laugh] That's not the Joke yet, wait a second. He draws a picture of a tree and says "what do yo think of that one when you see it?" he says "Sex". Alright then he draws a picture of a car, a house, "Sex, Sex, Sex." The Doctor Says, "You know You're obsessed with sex." and the patient says "Well You're the one drawing all the dirty pictures".
Dr. Leo Marvin
- On Monday we'll eat Gil on tuesday, we'll eat Bob.
- Son of a bitchin' BOB!
- (to Bob) GEDADDADACA!!! (get out of the car!!!)
- Let's take a walk.
- He can borrow my slicker!
- [phone ringing] Better not be who I think it is.
- I'm a failure.
- WHAT ARE YOU STARING AT?! I HAD EVERY RIGHT TO BUY THIS HOUSE!
- DON'T TOUCH MY SISTER!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
- NO I don't need any Valium!
- Mrs. Guttman: Burn in hell, Dr. Marvin!
- Mr. Guttman: She never says that.
- Bob Wiley: Have you ever hear of Tourette's syndrome? Involuntarily shouting profanity?
- Dr. Leo Marvin: It's exceptionally rare.
- Bob Wiley: Shit-eating-son-of-a-bitch... bastard, douche-bag, twat, numb-nuts, Dick head, bitch!
- Dr. Leo Marvin: Why exactly are you doing this?
- Bob Wiley: If I fake it then I don't have it. You know it's the same with the cardiac arrest.
- Dr. Leo Marvin: Are you married?
- Bob Wiley: I'm divorced.
- Dr. Leo Marvin: Would you like to talk about that?
- Bob Wiley: There are two types of people in this world: Those who like Neil Diamond, and those who don't. My ex-wife loves him.
- Dr. Leo Marvin: You've ruined my life! You've ruined my career! You've ruined my book! You've turned a peaceful house into an insane asylum! Get out!
- Anna Marvin: Daddy!
- Fay Marvin: My god, Leo What's gotten into you?
- Dr. Leo Marvin: It was a disaster, Fay!
- Fay Marvin: No, it wasn't. You were wonderful, sweetie.
- Anna Marvin: You were fine, dad.
- Siggy: Yeah. Why'd you need to kick Bob out of the House?
- Dr. Leo Marvin: You think he's gone? He's not Gone! That's the whole point, He's never gone! [Opens the door]
- Bob: Is this some radical new therapy?
- Dr. Leo Marvin: You see?!
- Bob Wiley: [Bob have told Siggy to leave] Goodbye, rat-Dick suck-nut!
- Siggy: [upstairs] Bye, dog-pissin-barf breath!
- Dr. Leo Marvin: [screams from the bottom of the stairs] SIGGY!
- Bob Wiley: Later, testicle-head bosom-beaver! [looks out the window] Good Morning Americas here!
- Siggy: [the Marvins have told Bob to leave, and they are saying farewells] Goodbye, green-puking pissaint!
- Bob Wiley: Later, barf-breath douche-mouth!
- Siggy: I mean, my dad just dropped me in the water. He let me go with no warning. I mean, I nearly drowned. My whole life passed before my eyes.
- Bob Wiley: You're lucky you're only 12.
- Siggy: It was still grim.
- Bob Wiley: What are we up to?
- Dr. Leo Marvin: Death Therapy, Bob. It's a guaranteed cure.
- Dr. Leo Marivn: I want some peace, and quiet.
- Bob Wiley: I'll be quiet.
- Siggy: I'll be peace.
- Bob's a special kind of friend. The kind that drives you crazy!
- Bill Murray - Bob Wiley
- Richard Dreyfuss - Dr. Leo Marvin
- Julie Hagerty - Fay Marvin
- Charlie Korsmo - Sigmund 'Siggy' Marvin
- Kathryn Erbe - Anna Marvin
- Tom Aldredge - Mr. Guttman
- Susan Willis - Mrs. Guttman