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Mork & Mindy

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Mork & Mindy is an American science fiction sitcom broadcast from 1978 until 1982 on ABC. The series starred Robin Williams as Mork, an alien who comes to Earth from the planet Ork in a small, one-man egg-shaped spaceship. Pam Dawber co-starred as Mindy McConnell, his human friend and roommate.

Season 1

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Mork and Mindy Special [1.01]

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Mork: [talking to himself] Boy, am I in for it now. Sent before the white desk again. What did I do? The solar lander, you fool, you painted a mustache on it. But Orson doesn't know I did it. Then why am I here? If I knew that I wouldn't be talking to myself.
Orson: Mork
Mork: Good morning, Orson
Orson: Orson. You call me Orson to my face, but behind my back you call me fatso, rocket ship thighs, and star-tush.
Mork: You forgot, "laser breath". Ar-ar [looks down] Sorry your immenseness.
Orson: See what I mean? These constant displays of humor are not acceptable behavior here on Ork.
Mork: You're right, we are rather a dull lot. The white bread of the universe.
Mindy: Would you like something to drink?
Mork: Water, or otherwise a quart of crude oil will suffice.
Mindy: I guess I can spring for the water.
Mork: Spring water. Ar-ar!
Mindy: Your suit's on backwards.
Mork: It is? Boy do I feel like a clone.
Mindy: You're not a priest are you?
Mork: I am Mork from Ork. Nanu nanu.
Mindy: Ork?
Mork: Yes. You see Ork is a planet. You follow the Big Dipper til it comes to a dead end then you hang an up.
Mindy: You drank that with your finger!
Mork: Yes. How do you drink?
Mindy: With my mouth
Mork: Well how do you talk and drink at the same time? Must be drool city.
Mork [throwing an egg into the air]: Fly, be free! [Splat]

Mork and the Immigrant [1.13]

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Mork: [holding a plate near a sink filled with suds] Welcome, friends, to the temple of suds. If you're ready now, throw down your forks and have your soul cleansed in the Joy to come. I've got some good news and some bad news. First the bad news, that sucker's hot! [throws in the plate and picks up a hand cranked beater and mixes the sudsy water] But now the good news, tonight we'll be having a jacuzzi.
[Mindy comes in angrily, slamming the door and taking her coat off, bunching it up, and throwing it onto the table]
Mork: Mindy, why are you mad at your coat?
Mindy: Because my watch stopped.
Mork: Ah! And you suspect your coat.
Mindy: No. My watch stopped and I got a ticket.
Mork: Oh. On Ork, when our watch stops, we only get a warning and they take away Mickey's hands.
Mindy: See, I was parked in this No Parking after 6 zone with my Jeep, and I got back late because of this stupid watch, and I got a $15 ticket.
Mork: Oh, that doesn't sound fair.
Mindy: It's not!
Mork: Then don't pay the ticket. We're with you. Right on, mama!
Mindy: I've got to, it's the law.
Mork: Who made that law?
Mindy: I dunno, the town council or something.
Mork: Who said they could do it?
Mindy: The people that voted them into office.
Mork: What people?
Mindy: You know, the people of Boulder. Dad, grandma, me, you know.
Mork: Boy, that's stupid. You voted to give yourself a ticket.
Mindy: Yeah, I guess indirectly I did, didn't I?

Season 3

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Mork Meets Robin Williams [3.14]

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Robin Williams: I... I-- I don't know why I can't say "no". I... I guess I want people to like me. I hate myself for that. I used to be able to say "no".
Mindy: What do you mean?
Robin: Well, before all this craziness started, my friends used to call me up and go "Robin! Come on, we're all going outside, really, there's some gnarly waves, we can all hang out" and I'd have to go "No, my Mama said I have to stay inside and read Nietzsche tonight". I don't know, I guess I felt really afraid to-- to say no to them because then they'd all say, like, "Oh! Robin Williams, Mr. Smarty Pants Big-Shot, whoa! You forgot your old friends, you can't lend me ten thousand dollars for a new car. You won't do the Save the Shrimp Benefit."
Mindy: This is none of my business, but it... it seems like, if they're really your friends, they'd understand. But it seems to me you can't say "no" to a total stranger.
Robin: You're right.
Mindy: It also looks like you're probably taken advantage of a lot. You know, if you learned to say "no", you'd probably have a lot more time to yourself.
Robin: Yeah, well maybe that's the last thing I want.
Robin: [regarding his break into stand-up] Anyway, it was always like being the new kid in the neighborhood and... well, since I was suffering from a case of the Terminal Shy, I... I couldn't make friends that easily. I always spent a lot of time in my room and I-- I created my own little world, full of, like, all these little characters that had strange and unusual qualities. After a while, I realized that more people kind of funny and outrageous and... then I got to the point where I realized the characters say and could do things that I was afraid to do myself. And, after a little while, here I am.

Catchphrases

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Mork: NA-NUU, NA-NUU
Mork: Shazbot!
Mork: Mork, calling Orson. Come in, Orson.
Mork: Until next week, this is Mork signing off.
Exidor: Mork, is that you?
Mork: K.O.
Mearth: What a bummer!
Mork: Mork, calling Orson, this is Mork signing on this week
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