Alice in Wonderland (2010 film)

From Wikiquote
Jump to navigation Jump to search
For other uses of "Alice in Wonderland", see Alice in Wonderland (disambiguation).

Alice in Wonderland is a 2010 film in which nineteen-year-old Alice returns to the magical world from her childhood adventure, where she reunites with her old friends and learns of her true destiny: to end the Red Queen's reign of terror.

Directed by Tim Burton. Written by Linda Woolverton, loosely based on Lewis Carroll's book, Alice's Adventures in Wonderland.
We Are All Mad Here.taglines


  • Curiouser and curiouser.
  • How can I be the wrong Alice when this is my dream?
  • It wasn't a dream at all, it was a memory. This place is real, and so are you and so is the Hatter.
  • [to the Jabberwocky as she raises the Vorpal Sword] Off with your head!

Iracebeth (Red Queen)

  • Never mind him, he's mad.
  • I love a morning execution, don't you?
  • Liars! Cheats! Falsifiers! OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!!!
  • You're right, Stayne, it is far better to be feared than loved.
  • Prepare the Jabberwocky for battle. We're going to visit my little sister.
  • [to her sister, Mirana] I know what you're doing. You think you can blink those pretty little eyes, and I'll melt just like Mummy and Daddy did.
  • No! It is MY crown! I AM THE ELDEST! [turns to her card guards] JABBERWOCKY!!
  • Where's your champion, sister? (Alice: Here.) Hello, Um.
  • The Hatter's interfering! Off with his head!


[Alice and her mother Helen are on the way to her surprise engagement party at the Ascot's estate]
Helen Kingsleigh: [feeling Alice's stomach] Where is your corset? [checking Alice's legs] And no stockings.
Alice: I'm against them.
Helen Kingsleigh: But you are not properly dressed.
Alice: Who's to say what's proper? What if it were agreed that "proper" meant wearing a codfish on your head? Would you wear it?
Helen Kingsleigh: [sternly] Alice.
Alice: To me a corset is like a codfish.

[Alice and Lady Ascot are taking a stroll through the garden]
Lady Ascot: Do you know what I've always dreaded?
Alice: [casually] The decline of the aristocracy?
Lady Ascot: Ugly grandchildren. But you're lovely. You're bound to produce little...Imbeciles! [notices that the gardeners have planted the wrong color roses] The gardeners have planted white roses when I specifically asked for red.
Alice: You could always paint the roses red.
Lady Ascot: What an odd thing to say.

Absolem: Who are you?
Alice: Absolem?
Absolem: You're not Absolem, I'm Absolem. The question is, who are you?

Iracebeth: [crouches down to a frog servant's height; whispering] Did you steal my tarts?
Frog Servant: No, Your Majesty.
Iracebeth: [wipes a splotch of juice from the corner of his mouth with her finger and tastes it; whispers] Squimberry juice.
Frog Servant: I was so hungry! I didn't mean to!

Chessur: It looks like you ran afoul of something with wicked claws. [purrs]
Alice: But I'm still dreaming.
Chessur: What did that to you?
Alice: Bander who...the bander...
Chessur: The Bandersnatch? Well, I'd better have a look.
Alice: What are you doing?
Chessur: It needs to be purified by someone with evaporating skills or it will fester and putrefy.
Alice: I'd rather you didn't. I'll be fine as soon as I wake up.
Chessur: At least let me bind it for you. [wraps up her wounds] What do you call yourself?
Alice: Alice.
Chessur: The Alice?
Alice: There's been some debate about that.
Chessur: I never get involved in politics.

Chessur: What's happened to you, Tarrant? You used to be the life of the party. You used to do the best Futterwacken in all of Witzend.
Alice: Futter what?
Thackery: Futterwacken!
Mally: It's a dance.
[Thackery starts dancing a jig]
Hatter: On the Frabjous Day, when the White Queen once again wears the crown, on that day, I shall Futterwacken...victoriously.

Stayne: [has his arm around Hatter's throat] If you're hiding her, you will lose your heads.
Hatter: [strained] Already lost them.

Stayne: You're all mad!
Thackery: Thanks very much. [belches loudly]

Alice: [to Bayard] You were supposed to lead them away, the Hatter trusted you!
Bayard: They have my wife and pups.
Alice: What is your name?
Bayard: Bayard.
Alice: Sit!
Bayard: [sits] Would your name be...Alice? By any chance?
Alice: Yes, but I'm not the one everyone's talking about.
Bayard: The Hatter would not have given himself up just for any Alice.
Alice: Where did they take him?
Bayard: To the Red Queen's castle in Salazen Grum.
Alice: We're going to rescue him.
Bayard: That is not foretold.
Alice: I don't care! He wouldn't be there if it weren't for me!
Bayard: The Frabjous Day is almost upon us. You must prepare to meet the Jabberwocky.
Alice: From the moment I fell down that rabbit hole I've been told what I must do and who I must be. I've been shrunk, stretched, scratched, and stuffed into a teapot. I've been accused of being Alice and of not being Alice but this is my dream. I'll decide where it goes from here.
Bayard: If you diverge from the path...
Alice: I make the path! To Salazen Grum, Bayard. And don't forget the hat.

Iracebeth: [referring to Alice, who's just grown to a large size and naked] And what is this?
McTwisp: It's a who, majesty. This
Iracebeth: "Um"?
Alice: [thinking quickly] From Umbridge.
Iracebeth: What happened to your clothes?
Alice: I outgrew them. I've been growing an awful lot lately. I tower over everyone in Umbridge. They laugh at me. So, I've come to you hoping you might understand what it's like.
Iracebeth: My dear girl, anyone with a head that large is welcome in my court. [to her subjects] Someone find her some clothes, use the curtains if you must, but clothe this enormous girl!
[Alice smiles]

Stayne: [sees Alice] And who is this lovely creature?
Iracebeth: Um, my new favorite.
Stayne: What is her name?
Iracebeth: Um.
Stayne: [to Alice] I believe your name has slipped the queen's mind.
Iracebeth: Her, IDIOT!
Alice: From Umbridge.

Hatter: [to Iracebeth] What a regrettably large head you have. I should very much like to hat it.
Iracebeth: Hat it?
Hatter: I used to hat The White Queen, you know. Poor dear, her head was so small.
Iracebeth: It's tiny. It's a pimple of a head.

Hatter: Have I gone mad?
Alice: [checking Hatter's temperature] I'm afraid so. You're entirely bonkers. But I'll tell you a secret. All the best people are.

Stayne: Um forced herself on me. I told her, "My heart belongs to you." But she's obsessed...with me.

Stayne: [enters Iracebeth's throne room] Majesty, Alice has escaped. [Iracebeth angrily slaps him in the face] On the Bandersnatch. [Iracebeth slaps him again but in the opposite direction] With the Vorpal sword.
Iracebeth: [slaps him again] HOW COULD YOU LET THIS HAPPEN?!
Stayne: I may have underestimated her. But...we have her conspirators. The Hatter and a dormouse.

[Hatter is in a cell; Bayard's wife, Bielle, and their pups are on the other side. One of the pups come away from the cell bars and goes over to his mom. Bielle keeps the other pups warm and gives a gentle, reassuring look to the pup that they'll be all right. They all look up to see Chess appearing]
Hatter: Hello, Chess.
Chessur: I've always admired that hat. I was wondering...since you won't be needing it anymore...perhaps you would consider bequeathing it to me?
Hatter: How dare you?! I'll have you know it is a formal execution and I would like to look my best, you know.
Chessur: It's a shame about all this. I was looking forward to seeing you Futterwacken.
Hatter: I was rather good at it, was I not?
Chessur: I really do love that hat. [smiles slyly] I would wear it to all the finest occasions. [evaporates]

Alice: I couldn't kill the Jabberwocky if my life depended on it.
Absolem: It will.

Alice: This is impossible.
Hatter: Only if you believe it is.

Alice: [to herself before facing the Jabberwocky] Six impossible things. Count them, Alice. One, there's a potion that can make you shrink. Two, and a cake that can make you grow.
Jabberwocky: So, my old foe, we meet on the battlefield once again.
Alice: We've never met.
Jabberwocky: [last words] Not you, insignificant bearer. My ancient enemy, the Vorpal one.
Alice: That's enough chatter. [cuts his tongue off. Mirana looks like she's about to throw up] Three, animals can talk. Four, Alice, cats can disappear. Five, there's a place called Wonderland. Six, I can slay the Jabberwocky. [begins battling the Jabberwocky]

Alice: Sorry, Hamish. I can't marry you. You're not the right man for me. And there's that trouble with your digestion. [walks over to her sister] I love you, Margaret, but this is my life. I'll decide what to do with it. [turns to Lowell, meeting his sour look with a stern glare] You're lucky to have my sister for your wife, Lowell, and be good to her. I'll be watching very closely. [then goes up to Imogene and takes her hands] There is no prince, Aunt Imogene. You need to talk to someone about these delusions. [walks past Lady Ascot, looking sternly at her] I happen to love rabbits, especially white ones. [goes up to her mother] Don't worry, Mother. I'll find something useful to do with my life. [turns to the Chattaway sisters] You two remind me of some funny boys I met in a dream.
Lord Ascot: You've left me out.
Alice: No, I haven't, sir. You and I have business to discuss.
Lord Ascot: Shall we speak in the study?
Alice: [smiles and starts to head to the house, when suddenly she turns back to the crowd] Oh. And one more thing. [lifts the hem of her dress to her knees and does the Futterwacken, much to everyone's shock]

[A blue butterfly flies over and lands on Alice's shoulder]
Alice: [last lines] Hello, Absolem.
[Spreading his wings, Absolem flies away as Alice watches him]
[screen fades to black as credits roll]


  • We Are All Mad Here.
  • Fantastic fun for the whole family