Back at the Barnyard

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Back at the Barnyard is a Nickelodeon show that is a spin-off of the 2006 film Barnyard. The show, which debuted in 2007, includes pop culture references and parodies.

Theme Song Lines[edit]

Farmer: I'm just heading to the fields, Duke. I'll be back. [drives off]
Sheep: Clear!
Otis: Alright!
Pip: Rat-a-bunga!
Otis: [while licking the strings of a guitar with his tongue] Ow, ow! OK, ow. [Pig yanks the strings free from his tongue] Ow!
Snotty Boy: Ha-ha! [shuts the door]

Season 1[edit]

The Good, The Bad, and the Snotty / Escape from the Barnyard [1.1][edit]

Freddy: He seems nice... or, wait, not nice. What's the word? It's on the tip of my tongue. Oh, yeah, dangerously insane!

Freddy: Yay, I love kabobs!
[Everyone looks at him]
Freddy: Sorry.
Pig: My work here is done

Duke: [whining and punching a post] No, I do not want to be eaten. I'm too young!
Pip: Dude, you're a dog. The farmer won't eat you.
Duke: What, you're saying I wouldn't go nice with some low-fat chips and a cherry cola?

Cowman & Ratboy / A Cow's Best Friend [1.2][edit]

Otis: Pip and I have this great idea. We totally want you guys to join us.
Bessy: Yeah, I'll do that right after never.

Otis: With great cow power, there must also come great cow responsibility!

Chez Pig / The Right Cow [1.3][edit]

Duke: [sticking paws into a hot pot] This is boiling water, isn't it?

Female Patron: And I'd like a side salad.
Bessy: Yeah, well, I'd like a cruise to Barbados, but that's not happening either.

[Otis, Pip and Pig meet a monkey named Bingo, who came from a rocket]
Bingo: Oh, yeah. It's a rich full life. The name's Bingo, test chimp #657. Lemme get this straight. Uhh, there's no one around here but us animals?
Otis: Yep. The farmer is at his sister's house in Pacoima. So just us.
Bingo: Sweet!

[Moments later, Bingo finishes fixing the rocket]
Bingo: What do you think, Otis? She's all repaired and ready to go.
Pip: Whoa, no way! Otis can't fly this thing, he can barely drive a stick.
Otis: Pip, relax. It's just a simulated flight. I mean, you know, Bingo wouldn't put his top test cow in any kind of danger.
Bingo: Simulated. Yeah, you took these words right out of my mouth.
[Bingo takes a control device from his spacesuit]
Bingo: Oh, oh, oh, and by the way, one little thing. It's not!
[Bingo presses a button, trapping Otis and Pip inside the rocket]
Otis: What? Hey, what's going on? We're trapped!
Bingo: That's right, cud boy, I'm sending you into orbit. Of course, there's no biggie for someone with your vast space experience.
Pip: Ground Control to Major Monkey. He lied!
Otis: We were nice to you! We said you could stay with us and some of us licked you! Why are you doing this?!
Bingo: Because I spent my whole life taking orders from humans! And I'm not about to start taking them from a cow! Any moo. 10, 9, other numbers, blast off!
[Bingo presses another button on the control device and the rocket lifts off, causing Otis and Pip to scream]
Bingo: [hooting] That's the last time we're ever going to hear from Otis the Daring Space Cow.
[Abby and the others run over to him]
Abby: Bingo, what's going on?
Pig: What happened to Otis and Pip?
Bingo: I sent your leader and his little-rat friend on a 1-way trip. You're all taking orders from me now.

[In space, the rocket orbits above Earth]
Otis: I can't believe I let that backstabbing monkey do this to us! [looks through the window] But still, it looks amazing up here.

Bingo: [after Otis and Pip landed the rocket] Good job, Otis, you passed the evaluation! [laughs] You know I was just testing you, wasn't I?
Otis: Really. You know, I got a little test for you.
Bingo: [meeting his defeat] This isn't over, cow! I'll be back! You ought to wish you never had!
[Pip presses the button on the control device, and the rocket launches up]
Bingo: Ugh! It smells like wet cow in here.

Saving Mrs. Beady / The Farmer Takes a Woman [1.4][edit]

[All stuck in the chicken coop]
Pig: Gotta say, not too crazy about the new digs.
Otis: I don't know. I kind of like it. It gives the chance to really know each other; like the various meats of a hoagie.

Hypno-A-Go-Go / Fowl Play [1.5][edit]

[Otis watches a boxing film, eyes on the watch as he swings it left to right, and then hypnotizes himself]
Otis: Oh, watch. It's just you and me. And I'm not letting you out of my sight. Why would I? I mean you're so round and pretty and shiny and... [hypnotized] ...wavy
Boxing coach: Now listen up kid. You got to do exactly what I say.
Otis: Do exactly what you say.
Boxing coach: You've got Farmer on the ropes. He's ready to fall. When you hear the bell, destroy Farmer.
Otis: When I hear the bell, destroy farmer. DESTROY FARMER!!! [falls to sleep]

Otis: [writing personal advertisement for the Farmer] Let's see now ... Gloomy farmer seeking anyone with pulse. Hmm ... We should hot it up a little.
Pip: Write he's rich. The ladies love cheddar.
Otis: [writing] Rich farmer.
Abby: And he got to have muscles!
Otis: [writing] Rich, really bulky farmer.
Pig: Yes, but don't write farmer! Write [writing] exploding lion tamer.
Abby: Even more bulky! And write that he has a pony! [writing] Has a pony...
Otis: Okay, I will read it to you. Reflag 7-star number sign glare... Man, I wish we had fingers!
Pip: I can do it. [jumps on the keyboard] There, what do you think?
Otis: [reading] Wealthy, agricultural mogul with body of a Tetanic god wants to share his heart with you.
[Everybody likes it]

The Big Barnyard Broadcast / Dead Cow Walking [1.9][edit]

Otis: Guess I'm first. Check it out guys, won't even break a sweat.
Pip: There goes one brave cow.
Dr. Glove: Oh, aren't you a big sweetie! Okay honey, I'm just going to do a little looky-loo, yeah, that's all. [snaps glove suggestively] Mm-hm.
Otis: Moo? [Otis wails in pain as animals watch on in horror]

Bessie: [sighs] I'm glad your not dead.
Duke: And we aren't leaving your side until you get better pal. [someone honks a car horn]
Pip: Dr. Glove is back! [the animals scatter]
Dr. Glove: Hey, sweetie, how's my big sweetie, okay! I'm just going to do a little check poo! [snaps glove suggestively]
Otis: Moo? [begins screaming hysterically off camera]

A Tale of 2 Snottys / Snotty's New Pet [1.13][edit]

[Snotty's been eaten by his pet snake]
Dr. Glove: Okay, yeah, interesting. You're inside a snake, aren't you, yeah, you're deep in there. Okay, this might be very painful. [pulls on Snotty's legs]
Snotty Boy: [screams in agony]
Dr Glove: Ah-ah-ah. Just a few more hours.

Brave Udders / Otis's 11 [1.17][edit]

Badger: Mail call! [tosses some letters to Otis]
Otis: Thanks, Badger! [looks through the mail] Man, I feel great! I mean, nothing, but nothing, could ruin a wonderful day like this.
[Otis spots one letter then screams as a thunderstorm appears behind him]
Otis: Krouser Krebs?! It can't be!
[Otis takes out a note and reads it]
Otis: "Hey, Beef Boy."
Krouser Krebs: [voiceover] "Long time, no see. Get ready! I'll be coming for you at 10 A.M. tomorrow!" [echoes]

Pip: Dude, for the last time, what's bugging you?
Otis: Ugh, fine! I got a letter today from Krouser Krebs.
Pig: Krouser Krebs?! I've never heard of him.
Otis: You've never heard of him? Check out this flashback.
[A flashback shows Otis as a calf wearing a propeller hat]
Otis: [voiceover] Not a day would go by when I wasn't bullied by Krebs.
Young Otis: [singing] La-la-la-la-la!
Someday my head will fit my body
[Suddenly, Krebs's shadow looms over him]
Krebs: [voiceover] Well, well, well! If it isn't Beef Boy?! Time to take a stroll down the meat aisle! [punches Otis from offscreen] T-Bone! Rump roast! Filet! Sirloin! Ha! Now let's see what we got in the dairy section!
Young Otis: No, no, not the dairy section!
Krebs: 2%! 1%! Half and half! Haha! Why are you squirting yourself?! Stop squirting yourself! Clean up on aisle 3! [laughs] See you tomorrow, Beef Boy! [walks off]
Young Otis: Clean up on aisle 3.
[Back in reality]
Otis: Clean up on aisle 3. Clean up on aisle 3. [sighs] Krebs found me and he's coming for me at 10 A.M. tomorrow!

[Pig looks at a watch]
Pig: It's almost 10. Krebs will be here any minute.
Otis: And I'm so ready!
[The others cheer]
Otis: Yeah, I got my bags all packed and my flight leaves in 2 hours.
Krebs: [voiceover] Yo, Beef Boy!
Otis: Ahh, too late! Hide me!
[As Otis hides behind Abby, Krebs approaches closer and his shadow becomes small revealing that he is actually a duck. Krebs quacks. The other animals are confused]
Abby: Hang on a minute. Where's Krebs?
Otis: What do you mean "where's Krebs"? He's standing right there.
Peck: Right where?
Otis: There!
Pig: You mean, uh, behind the duck?
Goat: Otis? No, I haven't seen him.
Otis: No, not behind the duck, Krebs is the duck!
[The others look at Otis, gaze at Krebs for a moment, then laugh]

[Peck and Freddy approach Krebs]
Freddy: We heard you're looking for Otis.
Krebs: Hey, you know Otis?
Peck: Oh, yeah. And if you want him, you've got to go through us.
Krebs: Hey, look, I don't want any…
Freddy: Stupid duck says what?
Krebs: What?
Peck: Stupid duck says what?
Krebs: What?!
[Peck and Freddy laugh]
Peck: You're in for it now, beak-face. You know why? I'll tell you why. Because we were the barnyard's champion taunters. 6 years running!
Krebs: Look, look, guys, I just want to talk to Otis. You see, I recently--
Freddy: We know you are, but what are we?
Peck: Nice!
[Peck and Freddy laugh again, then high-five each other]
Krebs: I'm warning you. Cut it out!
[The duo make goofy sounds, taunting Krebs. Krebs's head throbs and his eyes bulge up, turning bloodshot. He then shakes with anger as Freddy and Peck look at each other, then spins into a fight cloud]
Peck: Hey, Fred, are you--?
Freddy: Run away!
[Peck and Freddy try to run away from the fight cloud, but Krebs yanks them in, beating them up]
Freddy: [poking out] Mommy!!!
Abby: [gasps]
[Peck and Freddy are thrown into the barn doors]
Pip: Holy beatdown!
Duke: He can't do that to our friends! Come on, fellas! [charges toward Krebs with Pig and Pip at his side]
Otis: No, don't! He'll turn you into pieces while enumerating the parts of your body in an assaulting fashion!
[The trio leap and begin to attack Krebs, but are caught in the fight cloud]
Narrator: 230 minutes later…
[Krebs continues beating up Pig, Pip and Duke]

[in a clip called "Ask Dr. Pig"]
Pig: Hello, I'm Dr. Pig, and I'm here with the word about bullying. Bullying is a misdirected attempt at attention rooted in anger and frustration.
[Suddenly, Krebs bursts through the wall]
Krebs: Roar! [starts beating up Pig]
Pig: Ow! Hey, I'm a doctor! There's only one thing! Help! [Krebs throws him, leaving a hole-shape of himself in the wall of the barn] Whoa! Oof!
Krebs: Here's Krebsy!

Otis: [as he watches Krebs beat up Abby] Oh, no, not Abby! Now he's gone too far!
Krebs: [after finishing Abby off] I'll ask one more time. Where's Otis?!
Otis: I'm right here, Krebs, and you're done pushing my friends around!
Krebs: Otis! Finally! Listen, I just want--
Otis: Have at you! [beats up Krebs] Duck sauce! Spicy wings! Crispy meat roll! DUCK À L'ORANGE!!
[Otis belly flops on top of him]
Pip: Otis, you did it!
[The others cheer for him]
Otis: I did it! I faced my fear!
[Suddenly, Krebs lifts him up off of himself]
Otis: It's like I feel a foot taller.
[Krebs spins Otis and throws him against the barn]

[Looking at Otis, Krebs lifts his wing in a fist, then holds it out to him]
Krebs: Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?
Otis: [looking confused] Huh? What do you mean? [as Krebs helps him up] Aren't you going to pound me into a pulp and use my ego as a chew toy?
Krebs: No! Otis, I came here to apologize for being a jerk to you as a kid.

Doggelganger / Save the Clams [1.22][edit]

[Duke has been replaced with an imposter named Baxter at the vet]
Dr. Glove: OK, Baxter, it's doggy-doctor time! Who loves his doggy-doctor? You do, yes you do, yes you do!
Duke: [mumbled protestation]
Dr. Glove: Aw, don't be scared boy, this won't hurt at all. [reads "Duke's" chart] Oh, deep de-worming. I was wrong. [starts up a giant machine] This is gonna hurt! Yes it is, yes it is!
[Duke recoils in terror]

Dr. Glove: Aw, relax, Baxter, the worst is over, yes, it is, yes, it is! [takes off safety goggles and reads the chart again] Oops, I'm wrong. Says here I have to flush out your brain hole. [picks up a large syringe-like device] Who's got a dirty brain. Baxter does, yes, he does!
[Duke is mortified]

Duke: Hang in there, Duke. You've been poked, drilled, humiliated, but there's nothing they can do to break you. Nothing!
Dr. Glove: [returns with a bucket of leeches] OK, Baxter, time for your butt-leeching. Who's going to his butt leeched? Baxter is, yes, he is!
Duke: OK, that's it! [knocks leeches into Glove's face and runs away]
Dr. Glove: Oh, the leeches are on my face. [stumbles into wall] Who's draining my face blood? [hits head on examination lamp] You are, yes you are! [collapses from blood loss/head trauma]

Barnyard Idol[edit]

Peck: Why, it sounds like a heavenly angel.
Freddy: Or a bewitching sorceress luring us to our doom.
Otis: Hey, maybe the angel and the sorceress had a kid... a...
Freddy: You mean a sorcer-angel?
Otis: No, more like an angel-ress.

Season 2[edit]

Endangered Liaisons[edit]

[Inga, a real spotted ferret from Sweden, jumps out of a box]
Inga: [Swedish accent] Hello! I'm Inga. It's nice to meet you.

[In the farmer's house, Abby uses a Spotted Ferrets website with an image of Inga on a computer]
Abby: OK, here's a Spotted Ferrets website.
Otis: Awesome! What does it say?
Abby: Let's see. It says on her wedding day, the lady spotted ferret builds a commitment den.
All: Aww.
Abby: Then the male gussy himself up for the ceremonial courtship dance.
All: Aww.
Abby: And following the dance, she eats her mate's head.
Otis: Uhh…
Pig: OK, what are we going to get them?
Otis: Holy Cud! She's gonna eat Freddy's head!
Pig: Huh. So I guess the hat is off.
Peck: No wonder she's the only spotted ferret left! She's a head eater!

[In the commitment den, Freddy, who is a fake spotted ferret, faces Inga]
Freddy: [to Inga; sliding a ring on her index finger] With this ring, I pledge my love.
Inga: [to Freddy; holding a bottle of barbecue sauce] With this barbecue, I pledge my love.
[Inga pours the sauce on Freddy]

Freddy: [after Abby uses the spot remover to spray off the fake spots] Are we married yet?
Inga: [looking suprised] Huh?
[From off-screen, Inga spits out his head; tumbling Freddy onto the side of the hole]
Inga: Freddy, you're not a spotted ferret! You lied to me!
Freddy: Inga, I can explain.
[Inga packs up]
Inga: No! The wedding is off! And to think, I almost ate your head! [sobs]

Snotty & Snottier[edit]

Nora: [to Phlegmy Boy, after she saved Snotty Boy] I'm sending you back to your mother and father, and you're never coming here again! EVER!!!!
Phlegmy Boy: [last words as Nora drags him away by his ear] I'll be back, Eugene. And I'm gonna eat your silly-billy skull!

Man's Best Fiend[edit]

[After Otis had a plan to let the farmer get a new friend for Duke]
Farmer: Meet your new pal, Duke. You boys have fun.
Duke: Hey, how you doing, fella? I'm Duke. Come on out and say hi.
[Admits the darkness in the cage, a figure peeks out. Duke pants patiently as the figure, which is actually Baxter, steps out of the cage]
Baxter: Well, Duncan, we meet again.
[Duke gapes then screams like a girl]
Otis: [rapidly] Oh, no! Guys, it's Baxter! You remember Baxter! Baxter was that awful mutt who switched places with Duke at the vet, then tried to steal his life here at the barnyard!
Abby: Otis, we know. It was just a couple weeks ago.

[The farmer stares disappointed at Duke after Baxter blamed him]
Farmer: You're not the dog I thought you were, Duke. From now on, you stay in the barn.
[As the farmer shuts the door and leaves, Duke hangs his head sadly as Otis, Abby, Pig, Pip, Peck and Freddy approach him from behind]
Otis: Duke, what happened?
Duke: That little mutt, Baxter, framed me so he can have the house to himself.
Abby: What?!
Pig: He did what to you?!
Freddy: No way!
[Nearby, Baxter looks at them through a window]
Baxter: Actually, it's true. I played you like a cheap squeak toy, and there's nothing you can do about it.
Otis: Nothing? Really? Whoa! I don't know. I'm sure if we put our heads together but get him!!
[Baxter gapes and runs off]
Abby: Yeah! Get him!
Pip: There he is! Get him! Come on, the farmer's out!
Freddy: Don't let him get away!
Baxter: [as Otis and the others chase him] Oh, yes! Chase me! I love chase! This is much fun than I love ball! Oh, wait. That's right, I hate ball.
[Baxter barks as he runs to the farmer and jumps into his arms. Otis and the others stop, then stand on four legs. Pip remains standing on Pig's head while Freddy puts his hands on the ground and so does Peck with his wings]
Farmer: Bad animals! Chasing a poor innocent puppy, shame on you!

Duke: [after calling Baxter on the phone] I'll show Baxter! I don't need the farmer, I got all the friends I need right here. So, uh, who wants to deworm me?
[Otis and the others are confused]
Otis: Barn meeting! Guys, we can't let Baxter get away with this. We need to get him out of that house, and Duke back in, for all our sakes.
Duke: But, Otis, Baxter set me up good, and the farmer will never take me back.
Otis: I think he would, if you save him from a man-eating bear!
Freddy: Ooh, I like where this is going!
Duke: Well, I don't.
Otis: Relax, it won't be a real bear, it'll be me in a bear costume. Now, the farmer takes Baxter out every afternoon for his walk…
Freddy: Oh, I love that plan!
Otis: I haven't said it yet.
Freddy: Now I'm confused.
[Daytime, the farmer takes Baxter out for a walk]
Farmer: OK, Baxter, you lead the way.
Baxter: [barking]
Farmer: [chuckles] What a cute little dickens.
[Suddenly, a real bear jumps out from behind a tree! Baxter screams]
Farmer: A bear! Get him, boy, get him!
[Baxter circles around the farmer then pushes him toward the bear]
Farmer: Huh? What? Don't! Stop! What are you doing? Bad dog! No!
[Duke watches them through binoculars]
Duke: Look at Otis, what a ham. Well, I guess it's show time.
[Duke charges toward the bear, thinking it's Otis in a bear costume. The bear looks around as Duke kicks his leg, double kicks his back, bites his rear end, and Kung Fu kicks his face. Being knocked out, the bear stops near the farmer's feet. The farmer, unharmed, looks surprised]
Farmer: Duke, you saved my life! I never should've kicked you out, boy. Can you forgive me?
[The farmer pets Duke's head as Baxter approaches while whining. The farmer glares at him]
Farmer: And as for you! Throwing me into a bear. Bad dog! You're going back to the shelter to find a new home.
[As Baxter watches the farmer walk off with a hurt expression, he turns to Duke angrily]
Baxter: This isn't over, Denwood, I'll be back. You'll see! And then, we'll--
[He gets yanked away]
Duke: They're gone, Otis. You can get up now. Otis?
[Otis, in a bear costume, approaches]
Otis: Roar! Roar! Roar! Roar! Roar!
[He takes off the mask]
Otis: Oh, hey, Duke. Where's the farmer?
Duke: He just took Baxter back to--
[Duke looks confused]
Duke: Hold up. If you're there, then who's that?
Bear: Round 2, sheepdog!
Duke: Wait, uh, I can explain. You see, that other dog stole my identity in the previous episode, and recently returned to try it again.

Professor Exposition[edit]

Otis: [voiceover; singing] Professor Exposition, explainer of things!
He's clarifying power points to explain away confusion!

Puppy Love[edit]

[Duke's sister, Stamps, arrives at the barnyard]
Stamps: [British accent] Hey, Dukey!
Duke: Stamps!
Stamps: How you doing?!
Duke: Come here, sis!
[He hugs her]

Duke: Stamps, these are my friends, Otis, Abby, Pig, Pip,
Pip: What's up?
Duke: Peck,
Peck: Hi there!
Duke: and Freddy.
[Freddy greets Stamps with an arrowed plunger on his face]
Stamps: It's nice to meet you. I can't stay long, Dukey. We just want to stop by and get your blessing, then it's off to Vegas for the wedding.
Otis: Vegas? That's practically in Asia. Why don't you guys just get married here at the barnyard?
Stamps: Oh, we wouldn't want to be a bother.
Abby: Oh, it's no bother. The farmer is away for the whole week at Fire Dance Camp.
[At Fire Dance Camp, the farmer, wearing a grass skirt, fire dances]
Stamps: In that case, we loved to get married here!
[Otis and the others chatter in excitement. Freddy muffles as if to say, "Weddings are good!"]
Duke: So, Stamps, where's my future bro-in-law anyway?
Stamps: Right behind me with the bags. Here he comes now.
[A figure, with its legs seen, carries three bags]
Duke: Look at him, carrying your bags all gentlemanly. I like this guy already.
Male voice: Thanks, Darren.
[The figure, which turns out to be Baxter, drops the bags]
Baxter: I like you, too.
[As Otis and the others gasp in shock, Freddy pulls the arrowed plunger off of his face]
Duke: Baxter?!
Baxter: That's right. Your sister and I are getting hitched.
Duke: Whoa, whoa!
[He pushes his nemesis aside]
Duke: Stamps, you can't marry this guy! He's a total conman!
Otis: Yeah, he stole Duke's identity and try to get him kicked out of the barnyard!
Abby: And then he tricked the farmer into adopting him and got Duke kicked out of the house!
Pig: And once he cut off a guy's hand and expelled him from the Jedi Council!
Pip: Dude, that was a movie.
Pig: I like movies.
[A flashback shows Pig, disguise as a boy, watching a horror movie in a movie theater]
Pig: Don't go in there, the monster's in there! Don't do it, old friend! You believe this? It's like she's not even listening.
[He answers the phone]
Pig: Hey, I'm at the movies. Alice just went into the room where Dracula is waiting. Well, of course, I've warned her!
[Back in reality]
Duke: I'm telling you. This guy is trouble.
Stamps: Dukey, it's OK. Baxter has told me all about his past, but he's different now.
Baxter: That's right, Dakron, your sister's love has made me a new dog.
Stamps: Will you please give us your blessing, Dukey? Please??
[Stamps looks at her brother with puppy dog eyes]
Duke: Oh, geez, with the puppy dog eyes? Alright. But I'll be watching you, buddy.
[Duke makes an "I'm watching you" gesture]
Stamps: Thanks, Dukey! Ain't that wonderful, honey?
Baxter: It sure is, Cuddle-wuggles. Give me some sugar.
[As Stamps and Baxter rub their noses together, Duke growls angrily while he bares his teeth]

Otis: [shouting into Duke's ear, causing his brain to poke out of his head] Baxter is marrying your sister so he can kick your family's various buckets and get your fortune!
Duke: What?! [as he puts his brain back in his head] Why, that skivvy little mutt!

Stamps: [after Duke tricked Baxter] I heard the whole thing, Baxter! You lying, no-good, flimflamming...!
Baxter: But, Stimpy, I can explain!
Duke: You're busted, Baxter. Have fun on your honeymoon.
[Duke puts him in a cage on a catapult]
Baxter: Wait, Derek! You can't do this! I'm your husband!
[Duke launches Baxter away]
Baxter: [last words] I love you!


External Links[edit]

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