Dr. Dolittle (film)
Appearance
(Redirected from Doctor Dolittle (1998))
- For the 1967 film, see Doctor Dolittle (film).
Dr. Dolittle is a 1998 American comedy film starring Eddie Murphy as a doctor who discovers that he has the ability to talk to (and understand) animals. The film was inspired by the series of children's stories of the same name by Hugh Lofting, but used no material from any of the novels. The principal connection is the name and a doctor who can speak to animals, although the pushmi-pullyu, a feature of the books, makes a very brief appearance in a couple of scenes.
John Dolittle
[edit]- [after hearing Rodney speak] See, those guys in my dorm told me that stuff wouldn't affect me. [starts to cry] Now, fifteen years later, this shit starts happenin' to me!
Dialogue
[edit]- Young John: Why do dogs sniff each other's butts?
- Prologue Dog: Well, this is kinda our way of shaking hands. If you really wanna get a sense of who somebody really is, you gotta sniff their butt.
- Archer: Son! Stop talking to the dog. She doesn't understand a word that you're saying.
- Young John: [about the prologue dog after she is given up for adoption] She was my best friend.
- Archer: You'll make some real friends now.
- Lucky: From that day on, John Dolittle never spoke to animals again.
- Archer: Someday, you're gonna thank me for this.
- John: Who's this?
- Rodney: I'll give you a hint. I'm cute, I'm furry, and I make five hundred babies a year!
- Rodney: [in his cage, on top of John's car] Oh, stop, slow down!
- John: Shut up! I can hear you up there, shut up!
- Rodney: Come on, Doc! I'm getting whisker-whipped up here!
- John: One more word and I'll pull over and take you off the car, I'll let you out of your cage, and leave you in the wild! With the REAL animals! See how much talk you do when a couple of real squirrels are kickin' in your ass!
- Rodney: Fine, then I'll just sing! [sings] The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind... You know it is!
- John: Turnin' up the radio! [turns on the radio at full volume]
- Rodney: This guinea pig is blowin' in the wind...! Come on!
- John: I can't hear you! I'm groovin'!
- Rodney: Hey, why do they call me "guinea pig", anyway? I'm not Italian, and I'm not pork!
- Jacob: Ah, what's the use? It's not like anybody cares about tigers anyway, you know?
- John: Now stop, you're being silly. Listen - there have been lots and lots and lots of lovable tigers.
- Jacob: Yeah? Name one.
- Lucky: [short silence] How about Tony?
- John: Tony the cereal tiger?
- Lucky: What? I didn't hear you come up with anything.
- John: [snaps his fingers and claps] Oh! Remember that song "Eye of the Tiger" from Rocky III? [singing off-key] "It's the eye of the tiger, it's the da-da-da..." That one from Rocky III! When Rocky was fighting Mr. T, couldn't beat Mr. T - then Apollo Creed played "Eye of the Tiger" for him, he went back and beat the snot out of Mr. T because of "Eye of the Tiger". Because of that song! It moved him inside! Not "Eye of the Moose", not "Eye of the Bull," "Eye of the Tiger"!
- Jacob: That's it. I'm jumping.
- John: No, no, no, don't jump--!
- Rat 2: [from the ground] Just jump, ya big pussy!
- Rat 1: Come on, ya little scaredy cat!
- Rat 2: I'll catch ya! Not! [laughs]
- John: Didn't I say take a break?! [screams]
- Rat 1: All right, Doc! Then you jump!
- John: It's not really something you should be ashamed of. It happens to most men occasionally. You're probably under a lot of pressure.
- Female Pigeon: He's not under pressure. He's not attracted to me because I'm just a pigeon! He's a self-hating pigeon!
- Male Pigeon: Oh, th-that is not true.
- Female Pigeon: Ask him what he does all day. Go ahead, ask him.
- John: What do--?
- Male Pigeon: I sit in a tree by myself.
- Female Pigeon: It's because he's too good to eat with the rest of us when the old people feed us in the park.
- John: Can I say something?
- Female Pigeon: And the way he stares at a robin's breast? It's enough to make you sick!
- Male Pigeon: They're orange! I happen to be attracted to orange breasts, they're orange--
- Female Pigeon: You're not a robin! You're not a dove or a hawk! You're a pigeon, and I'm a pigeon...
- Male Pigeon: [over her] I'm sorry, she sits on that nest all day long, and she just gets a little crazy...
- Female Pigeon: [over him] ...and I've been sitting on a nest with three eggs, and they're gonna be pigeons too! [flies away]
- Male Pigeon: But may I ask you something? If I turn this way, don't I look a little like a blue jay?
- John: You're suffering from what's called obsessive-compulsive behavior.
- Obsessive Dog: Throw the ball, throw the ball, throw the ball!
- John: Whenever you want the ball, I want you to think about something else.
- Obsessive Dog: Don't say anything more, just throw the ball!
- John: Can you relax your mind?
- Obsessive Dog: [bounces up and down] This is the way it works: you're the person, you throw the ball, I'm the dog, I get it! Simple as that!
- John: Okay, all right, listen. Ooh! Look at you goin'. All right...
- Obsessive Dog: I swear, I swear, I'll pee on your carpet. Please!
- John: It's very irritating, this ball thing...
- Obsessive Dog: Please throw the ball! Shut up and throw the ball. Am I alone here?! Am I all by myself?! Am I in another universe?!
- Lucky and Rodney: THROW THE DAMN BALL!!
- [John throws it]
- Obsessive Dog: [runs after it] HE THREW THE BALL! OH, HE THREW THE BALL! I'll get it! I'll get it! [grabs the ball and brings it back] Oh! I love you! I love you! You threw the ball!
- Rodney: You can't save 'em all, Hasselhoff.
- John: What are you doing here?
- Lucky: I crossed three freeways to rescue you, and all I get is "What are you doing here?"
- John: This isn't a prison, it's a clinic!
- Lucky: Look, the tiger's in bad shape.
- John: The tiger?! Hey, listen, forget the tiger! Let me tell you something! I had a perfect life until you came along and started talkin' to me. Now I'm sittin' here in a robe discussin' Mr. Ed with these guys! You've ruined my life enough, I don't wanna talk to you anymore, just go away. Just get outta here, please, go, this is crazy!
- Lucky: Oh, I get it. Now it's crazy to want to save a tiger's life.
- John: Listen, tigers die every day. It's called nature.
- Lucky: Let me tell you a little about nature. I'm a dog, and I act like a dog. I don't try to be anybody else. We are who we are, and you are a doctor who can talk to animals. That's who you are!
- John: That is not who I am!
- Lucky: Stop lying to yourself!
- John: Didn't I tell you to get outta here?! Get outta here! Go! Get outta here! Get outta here!
- Lucky: [about to leave] Fine.
- John: Stop comin' around here talkin' to me!
- Lucky: [turns back] With pleasure!
- John: You better not come back! [screams]
- Lucky: Bonehead. [leaves]
- John: [to any nearby animals] That's all of y'all! LEAVE ME ALONE! STOP TALKIN' TO ME!!
- Lucky: [on his way out] Ruined his life, that's a laugh.
- [John screams three times; as he walks back inside, he notices other patients watching him; he screams at them]
- Maya: Can I tell you a secret?
- Archer: Yeah, sure.
- Maya: When Mommy told me what happened to Daddy, I wasn't afraid, I was happy, because I believed that he could talk to animals. I want Dad to be weird, just like me. Is that wrong?
- Archer: No. No, it's not wrong.
- Maya: It's just... sometimes, I don't think he likes me very much.
- Archer: Honey, he loves you.
- Maya: I know he loves me, but I don't think he likes me. And I really want him to. I'm gonna try to do things his way, Grandpa, and stop doing these stupid experiments.
- Archer: No, Maya. Don't stop your experiments. Sometimes... daddies are the ones who need to change. [looks pointedly at John]
- John: Let me park this car.
- Lisa: All Right, Come on, girls. Let's go.
- John: Maya. Let me talk to you a second.
- Lisa: We'll be in there in a second.
- John: OK. Hey, listen. I don't think your egg is a stupid idea. It's kinda cool.
- Maya: You do?
- John: Yes, I do. You have curiosity and ideas, and that's what makes you special.
- Maya: You mean weird.
- John: I didn't say weird. I said special. Being weird's not so bad. A lot of the greatest people in history were considered weird.
- Maya: Like who?
- John: Lots of people. Albert Einstein. With his crazy hair, people thought he was weird. A guy that smart was weird to people. Muhammad Ali, when he said what round he was gonna knock out people in and screamed "I'm the greatest." People thought that was super-weird. And Joan of Arc, she heard voices.
- Maya: Like you, Daddy?
- John: Yeah, like me. Listen, this is what I'm tryin' to tell you. No matter what happens, you be who you are. And you love who you are. Cos I love you. Gimme a kiss. Yes.
- Maya: You know, you're a great person.
- John: Oh, thank you.
- Maya: And a weird one too. See you inside.
- John: OK.
- Lucky: That was beautiful, man.
- John: Lucky! What are you doin' here?
- Lucky: Do you have a tissue?
- John: Yes, I do. Right in the back in that pocket over there. Listen. I'm sorry I ignored you back at the house. You were the one who said "Be who you are." You were right. Put me back in touch with the part of me that I'd forgotten years ago, Lucky. Can you take it easy? I'm tryin' to say somethin'.
- Lucky: Well, then just say it.
- John: I'm trying to say it. What do you think I'm tryin' to say?
- Lucky: "I love you, Lucky."
- John: That's not what I'm tryin' to say.
- Lucky: Yes, it is.
- John: That is not what I'm tryin' to tell you.
- Lucky: Come on. Deep down inside that's exactly what you want to say. Come on, now. You'll feel a lot better. Come on. Let it out. Go ahead. You know it. I know it.
- John: I love you.
- Lucky: You love me? I'm gonna need another tissue. Where are we off to?
- John: We are off to ruin my life. Psst! Wake up!
- Jacob: Hey, doc. You came back.
- John: You need help. I wanna take you for tests.
- Jacob: Tests? That's good, right? Tests?
- John: Yeah. Come on.
- Jacob: I hate these stairs.
- Baby Tiger: Take good care of him, doc. He's our star.
- John: He'll be OK.
- Jacob: Great. More steps.
- John: Come on. Get in.
- Jacob: Wait a minute. The dog gets to ride up front?
- Lucky: Stop looking at me like I'm a side dish.
- Jacob: Don't flatter yourself.
- John: Now, you two guys shut up. Quiet.
- Jacob: Hey, look. Jerry.
- John: Can you keep your voice down?
- Jacob: He's a big fan. Hey, Jerry. How you doin', dude? Just goin' for some tests.
- Policeman: Hey, hey, hey!
- Jacob: I'm fine! "The tiger's fine." I'm not sick.
- Male Pigeon: I told you they'd get away.
- Female Pigeon: No thanks to you.
- Male Pigeon: No thanks to me? Three armed guards versus a pigeon - that's a fair fight?
- Lisa: He's not at home and he's not answering his pager. I'm worried.
- Charisse: Mom.
- Lisa: Yes?
- Charisse: Guess who Maya brought to the party.
- Maya: Rodney. Rodney, there you are. Oh, man.
- Calloway: Where the hell is Dolittle?
- Mark: You know, I just talked to him. He stopped at an orphanage to take care of a sick child. That is so John. It's so typical of the man. He just cares.
- Calloway: Weller. Take your lips off my butt long enough to hear what I'm going to say. If Dolittle's not here in ten minutes, I'm pulling the plug. You won't have to.
- Mark: He's gonna be here in five minutes. I hope so. - He will be. He'll be here in five minutes.
- Woman: Hey.
- Rodney: Where's the kitchenette? I gotta get in here. Where's the food?
- Maya: Rodney.
- Rodney: Uh-oh. She's comin' to get me.
- Maya: Rodney.
- Woman in bathroom: Who's Rodney?
- Maya: Sorry.
- Rodney: This ain't no kitchen. Smell bad. Must be cookin' chitlins. Now what's this for? Somebody help me. I can't swim. Aaaggghhh yourself! Where you goin'? Get me outta here. Somebody get the license plate number. I have just been violated.
- Jacob: This is where you work?
- John: Come on.
- Rat 1: Don't throw that away. That's the marrow It's the best part of the bone.
- Rat 2: Look who's here.
- Rat 1: Well, if it isn't Siegfried and Roy!
- John: Keep it quiet. Lucky, keep an eye out. You rats help him.
- Rat 1: We don't work for you.
- John: Gimme a break. I saved your life.
- Rat 1: That's yesterday's news. You want gratitude, get a hamster.
- Rat 2: "Get a hamster." You kill me!
- Lucky: I gotta get help.
- Policeman: Yeah, I got a plate ID on the catnapper.
- Female Pigeon: Do something.
- Male Pigeon: The heart of a hawk. The heart of a hawk.
- Female Pigeon: A chicken hawk.
- Male Pigeon: The heart of a hawk.
- Female Pigeon: Oh.
- Rodney: [sings] I Feel good! Na, na, na, na. Like I knew that I would! That feels good.
- Gene: I enjoy my personal relationships with my patients.
- Mark: You'll get over that.
- Jeremy: I just might not.
- Mark: I'm joking. Gene. This is the kind of guy who would rather be trudging through the snow with a black bag...
- Jeremy and Mark: makin' house calls.
- Mark: Exactly. That hurt me.
- Gene: Oh, my gosh, I'm sorry.
- Mark: I may have broken my nose.
- Gene: I think I broke his nose.
- Mark: Is it broken?
- Gene: Let me check. Oh, my God! I broke his nose. Let me take him to X-ray.
- Mark: I'm blackin' out. I'm blackin' out.
- Rodney: Thaaaat feeeeels goooood!
- Mark: Gene, This really hurts. I think... Of course it hurts.
- Gene: You walked right into a door.
- Mark: Oh, God, I'm bleeding. I'm bleeding. Do we have any morphine in the vault?
- John: Hey, guys.
- Mark: John.
- John: What happened to you?
- Mark: I walked into a door.
- Gene: I crushed his septum.
- John: Oh, Really? Look, this is not really a good time. I'm kinda here with somebody.
- Gene: Oh, my God.
- Mark: What?
- Gene: I-I-I do not approve. Lisa is a wonderful woman!
- Mark: Jesus.
- John: It's OK, guys.
- Mark: It's a friggin' tiger, man.
- John: He won't hurt you. I know him.
- Jacob: Be afraid. Be very afraid. Oh, my goodness. I have to sit.
- Mark: Here's what we do. We tell Johnny we're gonna fix his little tiger up after he signs. OK? Then we'll have him committed. He's going to happy acres. It's perfect! That way we get our money.
- John: It's shifted to the left. So there's something applying pressure to it.
- Gene: But, John, you can't operate on a tiger. Especially as you don't know the symptoms are.
- John: Double vision and headaches. He told me so.
- Gene: You'll wind up back at Hammersmith's. I've been supportive, but if you expect me to believe that a tiger told you his symptoms, I might have to draw the line.
- Jacob: You have to do something. Quick.
- John: We gotta get him into OR fast. It's the only chance he's got.
- Gene: What about the press conference?
- Cameraman: 20 bucks says this guy never shows.
- John: Watch your back, everybody. Trying to get to the operating room.
- Calloway: Outta the way, please. Outta the way.
- John: Clear a spot. We have an emergency here. Ladies and gentlemen, please. Clear the way, please. Comin' through.
- Calloway: There you are. Let's do this.
- John: Mr. Calloway, Mark broke his nose.
- Calloway: The nose can wait. The press is waiting.
- John: I-I-I-I...
- Calloway: We're announcing.
- John: I really don't know if we should...
- Lisa: Where were you? I'll explain.
- Calloway: Thank you all for coming, and thank you all for being so patient. As you all know, the practice of medicine and the business of medicine have been undergoing very big changes in this country. We at Calnet strive to be at the forefront of these changes. That is why I'm proud to announce the acquisition of...
- Rodney: This is the life! Hot wings, nuts. I love nuts.
- Jacob: Oh, my! Live prey.
- Rodney: Uh-oh. That's a big cat!
- John: It's all right. It's OK. It's all right. It's OK. He's not gonna hurt anybody. He's just a very, very sick tiger.
- Calloway: You'd better have a rational explanation for all this.
- John: Mr. Calloway, I don't have a rational explanation. I wish I did, but I don't. Right now I got a sick tiger on my hands. I'm gonna try to save it. That's all that matters.
- Calloway: Dolittle, you go through with this...
- John: So if you'll excuse me...
- Rodney: Stupid cat. Ruined the party.
- John: Shut up.
- Rodney: What do you mean, shut up? I was gonna do karaoke!
- Policeman: What the hell is this?
- Pig: No more bacon. No more chops.
- Lucky: One, two, three, four. You ain't gettin' through this door. No justice, no peace.
- 'Drunk Monkey: Make love, not war.
- Lucky: Fur is murder. Free Willy.
- Male Pigeon: Pigs go home. Pigs go home. Pigs go home.
- Pig: Huh?
- Male Pigeon: No, no, not you. The police.
- Female Pigeon: Wow, this is great. Are you OK?
- Male Pigeon: The man's comin' down hard, but we're holdin' strong.
- Female Pigeon: Oh, I got such a chill.
- Male Pigeon: Really?
- Female Pigeon: Really?
- John: I'm gonna give you a local. It's not gonna hurt. It'll feel like a little bee sting.
- Jacob: Ohh.
- John: A little pressure. That's about it. OK? Here I come.
- Jacob: [inhales] Ohh.
- John: OK.
- Lisa: He can't do this. He still thinks he can talk to animals.
- Archer: He can, Lisa. He can talk to animals. It all started when he was a kid. I didn't know what to do.
- Lisa: What are you saying, Dad?
- Archer: I thought it was a handicap... but it's a gift, Lisa. Don't you believe it? Look, look, look. See for yourself.
- John: I need you to stay alert and tell me if you feel numbness in your paws or on your right side.
- Jacob: Have you ever done this operation before?
- John: Oh, yeah, once in medical school. But it was to a cadaver. My professor told me that had my patient not been dead, he would have lived.
- Jacob: Very comforting, doc.
- John: OK.
- Reporter: It's like Noah's ark out here. It truly is a remarkable sight. This collection of animals has prevented San Francisco's finest from entering the building. Which is apparently where the stolen tiger is being held.
- John: OK, we're open. Gene, irrigate, please. All right, Jake, I need you to be alert. Tell me if you feel anything at all. Can you feel anything now?
- Jacob: No. Just the same old pain.
- John: How about now? You feeling any numbness at all?
- Jacob: I... I can't. I don't know!
- John: Just relax and listen to the sound of my voice, OK?
- Jacob: I'm scared.
- John: Don't be scared. I'm not gonna let you go.
- Lisa: John? What did he say?
- John: He said he's a little scared.
- Jacob: [moans] Ow. Mmm.
- Gene: Pulse is dropping fast.
- John: His dura is bulging. There's too much pressure.
- Jacob: Uh-oh. My left side went numb.
- Gene: Pulse still dropping.
- John: All right. Hey, you just hang in there, OK, Jacob? Hang in there for me.
- Jacob: OK, doc.
- John: It's a blood clot. It has to be. All I gotta do is find it. We're too close to his motor strip. More suction, Gene.
- Gene: We're losin' him. We gotta relieve pressure.
- Lisa: Come on, Jake.
- John: Don't let go yet. We're almost there.
- Jacob: I can feel it. There. That's it.
- John: There? OK. OK, here we go.
- Jacob: It's gone. The pain is gone.
- Gene: Blood pressure stabilising.
- Jacob: It's gone. It's really gone.
- John: He's OK.
[crowd cheering]
- Lucky: Yeah, doc!
[animals cheering]
- Jacob: Thank you.
- John: You are very welcome. You just lay back and relax. We're gonna have you back in the centre ring in no time.
- Rodney: Hey, doc! Why'd you do that? If he tries to eat me again, I'm gonna smack that moustache off your face.
- Mark: He's a lunatic. He has a history of mental illness. He's frankly...
- Calloway: He's the most remarkable surgeon I have ever seen.
- Mark: He's here to stay. He is the straw that stirs the drink.
- Calloway: I want exclusive rights to him.
- Mark: He's dynamic, caring. I can't imagine... What's the matter?
- Calloway: Dolittle. Wonderful work.
- Mark: Bravo. Bravo, Johnny. I'm so inspired.
- Calloway: Welcome aboard. I feel like I bought a winning franchise.
- Mark: Oh, yeah.
- John: You haven't bought anything. We're not for sale.
- Mark: Look. We don't need these namby-pamby wacko freaks. It's you and me, straight to the top.
- Male Pigeon: You want pigeon? You'll get pigeon. Are ya happy now?
- Female Pigeon: I'm right behind ya.
- Rodney: Hey. Somebody come here. I think we got birth here. Hey, hey! Somebody! I see some shakin' in that egg. I see shakin' in the egg. Hey, how's it goin', McGruff?
- Lucky: Uh-oh.
- Rodney: You know what? A Tic Tac wouldn't kill you. Hey, girl, get up. We got birth comin'.
- Lucky: Oh, great. A swan egg. This is gonna be great.
- Rodney: Come on, girl.
- Lucky: One question. What is a swan?
- Maya: That's my egg hatching.
- Lucky: OK, just breathe.
- Rodney: Yeah, here it come, the magic moment. Oh, no. Just like Jurassic Park. It's gonna kill us.
- Maya: My swan egg's hatching. It's hatching. It...
- Lucky: Good Lord, doc. What on earth is that?
- John: That would be Maya's brand-new baby alligator.
- Maya: Cool.
- Baby Alligator: Mama?
- Rodney: Mama? I'm not your mama.
- Baby Alligator: Mama?
- Lucky: Oh no, don't look at me. Though there was that one time I got drunk in the Everglades. Hey, doc, wait up. So, you're gonna treat humans and animals? I love it.
- John: Yeah, well, it's no big thing. We're all basically the same, you know?
- Lucky: My thoughts exactly. OK, first, I want to move my bowl up on the dining-room table. Second, no more dog food. That stuff's just gross. I want my own room, with a TV. Basic cable will be fine.
- Rat 1: I hate stories with happy endings.
- Owl: Yoo-hoo.
- Rat 1: What you say?
- Rat 2: I didn't say nothing.
- Rat 1: Then who?
- Rat 2: Aah! Run! Run for your lives! Oh, my God!
- Rat 1: Let's go, buddy!
- Rat 2: I don't want to die! I'm too young to die!
- Rat 1: Hang a left. No, hang a right. Look out for the traffic!
- Rat 2: Oh, legs, do your thing. Out of my way.
- Rat 1: This circle of life really stinks!
- Rat 2: [screams]
About Dr. Dolittle (film)
[edit]- I did Dolittle for a particular reason. I wanted to do an extremely commercial movie. I love animals and I love Eddie Murphy, so I thought, "Here is a really commercial movie". I would never have thought I would have done something like this. The script wasn't particularly good when I started. It got a lot better, and it allowed me to form this company and hire Jenno Topping as my producer.
- Betty Thomas Los Angeles Times (April 2, 2000)
Cast
[edit]- Dr. John Dolittle - Eddie Murphy
- Archer Dolittle - Ossie Davis
- Dr. Mark Weller - Oliver Platt
- Lisa Dolittle - Kristen Wilson
- Dr. Fish - Jeffrey Tambor
- Maya Dolittle - Kyla Pratt
- Charisse Dolittle - Raven-Symoné
Voice cast
[edit]- Lucky - Norm Macdonald
- Jacob - Albert Brooks
- Rodney - Chris Rock
- Prologue Dog - Ellen DeGeneres
- Rat #1 - Reni Santoni
- Rat #2 - John Leguizamo
- Obsessive Dog - Gilbert Gottfried
- Female Pigeon - Julie Kavner
- Male Pigeon - Garry Shandling
- Owl - Jenna Elfman
External links
[edit]- Doctor Dolittle quotes at the Internet Movie Database
