dril

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dril—also known as wint—is a pseudonymous Twitter user best known for his idiosyncratic style of absurdist humor and non sequiturs.

Quotes[edit]

Tweets by year[edit]

2008[edit]

no

2009[edit]

how do i get cowboy paint off a dog .

2010[edit]

  • im little jesica. im dying because of obamas help care bill. im on my death bed and the doctor is ignoring me because my dady works hard
  • Welcome to the citadel of eternal wisdom. Behold, this crystal contains the sum of all human knowledge -- Except Rap And Country
  • icant come to work today.. on account of JERRY DUTY *SHoves every seinfeld disk into dvd player at once*

2011[edit]

'im not owned! im not owned!!', i continue to insist as i slowly shrink and transform into a corn cob
  • 'im not owned! im not owned!!', i continue to insist as i slowly shrink and transform into a corn cob
  • fuck "jokes". everything i tweet is real. raw insight without the horse shit. no, i will NOT follow trolls. twitter dot com. i live for this
  • "Is Wario A Libertarian" - the greatest thread in the history of forums, locked by a moderator after 12,239 pages of heated debate,

2012[edit]

another day volunteering at the betsy ross museum. everyone keeps asking me if they can fuck the flag. buddy, they wont even let me fuck it
"jail isnt real," i assure myself as i close my eyes and ram the hallmark gift shop with my shitty bronco
IF THE ZOO BANS ME FOR HOLLERING AT THE ANIMALS I WILL FACE GOD AND WALK BACKWARDS INTO HELL
"This Whole Thing Smacks Of Gender," i holler as i overturn my uncle's barbeque grill and turn the 4th of July into the 4th of Shit
  • see this watch? i got it by Crying. my car? crying. my beautiful wife? Crying. My perfect teeth? Crying. now get the fuck out of my office
  • another day volunteering at the betsy ross museum. everyone keeps asking me if they can fuck the flag. buddy, they wont even let me fuck it
  • how come a baby born with a foot in its brain is considered a "Miracle Baby" but when I get my dick stuck in a drawer im just some asshole
  • "jail isnt real," i assure myself as i close my eyes and ram the hallmark gift shop with my shitty bronco
  • THE COP GROWLS "TAKE OFF TH OSE JEANS, CITIZEN." I COMPLY, REVEALING THE FULL LENGTH DENIM TATTOOS ON BOTH LEGS. THE COP SCREAMS; DEFEATED
  • the doctor reveals my blood pressure is 420 over 69. i hoot & holler outta the building while a bunch of losers try to tell me that im dying
  • strongest blade in the world, howeve,r it is so fragile as to shatter when handled by any force other than the delicate touch of a lesbian .
  • IF THE ZOO BANS ME FOR HOLLERING AT THE ANIMALS I WILL FACE GOD AND WALK BACKWARDS INTO HELL
  • who the fuck is scraeming 'LOG OFF' at my house. show yourself, coward. i will never log off
  • oh nothin, i was just buying some ear medication for my sick uncle... *LOWERS SHADES TO LOOK YOU DEAD IN THE EYE* who's a Model by the way,
  • "This Whole Thing Smacks Of Gender," i holler as i overturn my uncle's barbeque grill and turn the 4th of July into the 4th of Shit

2013[edit]

if your grave doesnt say "rest in peace" on it you are automatically drafted into the skeleton war
its the weekend baby. youknow what that means. its time to drink precisely one beer and call 911
  • Food $200
    Data $150
    Rent $800
    Candles $3,600
    Utility $150
    someone who is good at the economy please help me budget this. my family is dying
  • if your grave doesnt say "rest in peace" on it you are automatically drafted into the skeleton war
  • big bird was obviously just a man in a suit. but the other ones were too small to contain men. so what the fuck
  • its the weekend baby. youknow what that means. its time to drink precisely one beer and call 911

2014[edit]

awfully bold of you to fly the Good Year blimp on a year that has been extremely bad thus far
  • it is with a heavy heart that i must announce that the celebs are at it again
  • the wise man bowed his head solemnly and spoke: "theres actually zero difference between good & bad things. you imbecile. you fucking moron"
  • blocked. blocked. blocked. youre all blocked. none of you are free of sin
  • awfully bold of you to fly the Good Year blimp on a year that has been extremely bad thus far
  • [man leans into doorway of WTC bathroom]
    "Hey, you gotta finish up in there. 9/11 is happening."
    "Alright. Just a sec."
  • drunk driving may kill a lot of people, but it also helps a lot of people get to work on time, so, it;s impossible to say if its bad or not,
  • THERAPIST: your problem is, that youre perfect, and everyone is jealous of your good posts, and that makes you rightfully upset.
    ME: I agree
  • joke's on you; i actually love being body slammed by one dozen perfect wrestlers. and my mouth isn't filled with bloodm, it's victory wine
  • the numa numa man just bougt a $70million house and im here at the library trying to photocopy a fruit roll up
  • koko the talking ape.. has been living high on the hog, wasting our tax dollars on high capacity diapers. No more. i will suplex that beast,

2015[edit]

the jduge orders me to take off my anonymous v mask & im wearing the joker makeup underneath it. everyone in the courtroom groans at my shit
Politic's is back baby. It's good again. Awoouu (wolf Howl)
  • do not be afraid to talk to that lonely boy on the train ... with the rosy red cheeks, sun glasses & big cigar... he just mmight be... angel
  • ah, So u persecute Jared Fogle just because he has different beliefs? Do Tell. (girls get mad at me) Sorry. Im sorry. Im trying to remove it
  • the jduge orders me to take off my anonymous v mask & im wearing the joker makeup underneath it. everyone in the courtroom groans at my shit
  • its fucked up how there are like 1000 christmas songs but only 1 song aboutr the boys being back in town
  • Politic's is back baby. It's good again. Awoouu (wolf Howl)
  • donlad trump reportedly says that normal type pokemon are a waste of time. they're just dirty birds & rats who have no right being a pokemon

2016[edit]

girls always love to telling people not to" Mansplain"
but they do not care of, "Man's Pain"
the human mind... perhaps the most powerful weapon. second only to the "GUN"
  • DOCTOR: you cant keep doing this to yourself. being The Last True Good Boy online will destroy you. you must stop posting with honor
    ME: No,
  • so long suckers! i rev up my motorcylce and create a huge cloud of smoke. when the cloud dissipates im lying completely dead on the pavement
  • user named " beavis_sinatra " has been terrorizing me since 2004, by sending me pictures of cups that are too close to the edge of the table
  • ME: there is a new type of beer called "Wine"
    shirtless guy witht 104 followers: Shut the fuck up
    ME: Yes sir
  • girls always love to telling people not to" Mansplain"
    but they do not care of, "Man's Pain"
  • 1st grade: Mastered.
    2nd Grade: MAstered.
    3rd Grade: Mastered.
    4th Grade: Heres when they start trying to trick you
    5th Grade:This ones hard
  • using the toilet when i hear Our national anthem start to play. i do what i must. i stand tall in complete agony; as shit runs down my leg,
  • im afraid you do not grasp the enormity of who it is you are dealing with. (removes diaper,. revealing two sub-diapers ) Shall we continue..
  • if you ask me this election could end about 100 different ways:
    1) trump gets 0% of the vote
    2) trump gets 1% of the vote
    3) trump gets 2% o
  • i refuse to consume any product that has been created by, or is claimed to have been created by, the (((Keebler Elves)))
  • trying to heal..... please donate to my go fund me... $10 will make me less racist... $100 will make me extremely less racist...thank you...
  • the human mind... perhaps the most powerful weapon. second only to the "GUN"

2017[edit]

File:ISIS enters Rakka.jpg
issuing correction on a previous post of mine, regarding the terror group ISIL. you do not, under any circumstances, "gotta hand it to them"
i hate i t when girls think im proposing whenever i take the knee at them in protest
  • issuing correction on a previous post of mine, regarding the terror group ISIL. you do not, under any circumstances, "gotta hand it to them"
  • look, im not saying that martin luther king jr was a gamer. that would be ludicrous. im simply saying that if games had existed at the time,
  • i lvoe and cherish all of the girls of this site, and other websites. you all become my wife more and more with each passing day. Thank you
  • people come up to me and say, "I will never use the bathroom. I will never shit" and i gotta tell them pal, sooner or later youre gonna shit
  • turning a big dial taht says "Racism" on it and constantly looking back at the audience for approval like a contestant on the price is right
  • revealing the gender of my baby by eating a whole bunch of food dye and taking a huge pink shit in front of my relatives. ah!! its a girl !!
  • DUMBASS: SHut the fuck up
    THE WISE MAN: No you shut the fuck up
  • im stupider then dog shit, i dont give a shit, and i dont give a fuck, and i will never shut the fuck up, and i'll always Respect my enemys.
  • my favorite feature of this site is absolutely no consequences for my opinions sucking ffucking ass and me being 100% wrong about everything
  • i often disagree with DigimonOtis, but his efforts to keep Sharia Law out of the donkey kong 64 wiki are much needed in this wolrd of danger
  • im afraid i must say that i do not find the mysteries featured on "scooby-doo" challenging enough .
  • getting pissed off at the idea of someone going on to wiki pedia and changing the name of the japanese suicide forest to "Warios Woods"
  • i hate i t when girls think im proposing whenever i take the knee at them in protest
  • VERIFY!! VERIFIY THIS ACCOUNT! THE TROLLS ARE BREAKING IN THROUGH THE WINDOWS!! I NEED THE CHECK MARK !! NOW!! NOW!! NOW!!
  • my friend the only crypto currency you wanna get your hands on is this: bird seed. There is a lot of birds and they all gotta eat

2018[edit]

  • love when i lose aobut 100 followers immediately after making a beautiful post. the weak shriveling up into dust. Thats called darwin
  • i regret to inform you, that by resorting to Swear language, you have forfeit this debate. Farewell my bitch
  • i just need to say, to anyone reading this.. You are Important, You are loved, and You belong in this world, if you have over 5000 followers
  • go ahead. keep screaming "Shut The Fuck Up " at me. it only makes my opinions Worse
  • the worst part of nationalism is having to pretend the flag is really good, like "yeah the country looks exactly like that. they nailed it"
  • i would take so many bribes if i was a judge. half my shit would be bribes. take bribes from the criminals until theyre too poor to do crime
  • a man asks God, how am i supposed to live, without George H.W. Bush
    God simply said "That is why I made 2 george bushs"
    The man just smiled.

2019[edit]

  • im not going to post about taking shits or shitting anymore . i Condemn all of my previous posts about shitting and asses
  • "The Godfather: Part Iraq" (2004) In this 4th installment of the Godfather series, the godfathers head to iraq to settle the score, of 9/11.
  • just found out about Object Permanence... why didnt any one tell me about this shit
  • Im the only man here who injects himself with a CIA Grade Truth Serum before each and every post i make. Remember only that
  • i think it would be fucking stupid to be a fat ass caterpillar and have your entire body be made out of weak points
  • the entire time youre watching the movie 101 Dalmatians, youre just thinking, This is so many more dalmations than usual. It is just fucked
  • theres a popular nursery rhyme in which the singer claims to be a teapot. this, for many children, is their first experience with "Trolling"


dril in interviews[edit]

Twitter, as I understand it, is a sort of "Hell" that I was banished to upon death in my previous life.
My posts are the bible. My brain is the bible. The books I'm releasing are bibles. It's all bible, baby
  • Twitter, as I understand it, is a sort of "Hell" that I was banished to upon death in my previous life. In this abstract realm, the only thing I am certain of is that my cries are awarded "Favs" or "RTs" when they are particularly miserable or profane. These ethereal merits do nothing to ease my suffering, but I have deliriously convinced myself that gathering enough of them will impress my unseen superiors and grant me a promotion to a higher plane of existence. This is my sole motivation.
  • it is absolutely a full time job, dealing with this Shit. i'm talking True full time, 24 hours. Listening to the perverts scream at me in the instant dm box while I'm trying to cobble together a coherent post. Standing on thje median strip at a busy intersection, next to the guy with a 20% off mattress sign, failing to shill copies of my Horrible book. Waking up screaming from Night terrors involving complete strangers accusing me of "Selling OUt." There is no clocking out. The clock is a part of me, it's always inside of me, and I'm fucked.
  • You may have heard of a character from the batman movies, called the Joker. The joker just lives a normal life like you or me, going to the grocery store, and the office or what have you. But WHen the joker puts his mask on, he becomes the joker, and he mercilessly goes out there and gets Paid. Thats what I try to do in my life and the way I live life, and I do do it every day, and it is the essence of understanding my pain.

External links[edit]

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