Jeffrey Ford

Jeffrey Ford at KGB bar, 2006

Jeffrey Ford (born November 8, 1955) is an American writer in the fantastic genre tradition.

Quotes

Short fiction

The Fantasy Writer's Assistant and Other Stories (2002)

Page numbers from the hardcover first edition, published by Golden Gryphon Press, ISBN 1-930846-10-X

See Jeffrey Ford's Internet Science Fiction Database page for original publication details

• What good is the illusion of fiction if it cannot show us a way to become the people we need to be?
  • The Fantasy Writer’s Assistant (p. 40)

• In their exquisite self-centeredness our ancestors believed that they were alone in the universe. At the same time, they had convinced themselves that Earth was the blue apple of God’s eye and the sole reason for all of creation. This two-headed fallacy caused humanity both delusions of grandeur and a paranoiac sense of loneliness.
  • The Far Oasis (p. 43)

• A slight grin that has nothing to do with merriment is the sure sign that she is about to set things straight. Her overall air is one of constant suspicion, and ever readiness to take offense.
  • The Woman Who Counts Her Breath (p. 59)

• He’s no physician, he’s Grandfather Mess. He couldn’t cure a pain in the ass unless he left the room.
  • At Reparata (p. 75)

• “My dear Philosopher,” said the countess. “You give sanity a bad name.”
  • At Reparata (p. 75)

• Real memories intrude now and then as do self-admonitions for a wasted life, but the smoke’s other feature is that it lets you not give a shit about anything but taking in more smoke.
  • Exo-Skeleton Town (p. 105)

• Life was never so clear-cut as to offer anything as certain as a war between Heaven and Hell. That was for stories.
  • Something by the Sea (pp. 144-145)

• He kneels and prays to heaven but nothing happens.
  • The Delicate (p. 160)

• If he’s not crazy, he’s probably playing with your mind. He seems to have a healthy measure of mischief about him. That string tie is a good indicator.
  • Malthusian’s Zombie (p. 173)

• “You gotta watch that anger. The customer’s always right,” said Merk.
  “The customer’s hardly ever right,” said Slackwell.
  • Floating in Lindrethool (p. 199)

• Between Heaven and Hell there is this place called reality. Reality might as well be Hell if you don’t have cash.
  • Floating in Lindrethool (p. 205)

• “I understand the human brain. It’s a double-edged sword. An evolutionarily development that gives you the wherewithal to know that life is basically a shit pastry one is obliged to eat slowly, and the ability to disguise that fact with beautiful delusions.”
  “Where do God and the cash come in?” asked Slackwell.
  “The cash is the pastry part. God, he just likes to watch us eat. The more we eat the more he loves us. You can’t live without love.”
  • Floating in Lindrethool (p. 205)