Sacha Baron Cohen
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- War! Huh? What is it good for? Well, for start? It sorts out who is the strongest out of the two countries. Also, you get to see some amazing explosions. But, there is some people out there who not only don't enjoy the war, but they try to spoil the fun for everyone else. And those chickens is called the 'U.N.' Me went to New York to meet these player-haters.
- I is here standing outside the United Nations of Benetton. Which is where representatives from the three corners of the world come to end wars, international drug trafficking, and everything else that is a bit of a laugh.
- I is here with the geezer who was the Secretary-General of the United Nations. His name be none other than my man, Boutros Boutros Boutros-Ghali.
- Which is the funniest language? It's French, isn't it?
- With all respect, why do you give crap countries a vote?
- As quoted in "War" (28 February 2003), Da Ali G Show
- In Kazakhstan the favorite hobbies are disco dancing, archery, rape, and table tennis.
- Thank you to every American who has not sued me so far.
- At the Golden Globe awards, after receiving the best actor award for comedy for his performance in Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan.Time Magazine 16 Jan 2007
- The moment I appeared the crowd started jeering and booing and shouting ‘faggot’ and spitting, I had hired a bodyguard and when the jeering started I turned to see where the bodyguard was, I could just see the back of his head as he was running out of the stadium.
- Describing the reaction of a 60,000 crowd of American Football fans and his bodyguard, while appearing as Bruno (the flamboyantly homosexual fashion journalist) at an NFL match 
- I saw some amazing, beautiful, invigorating parts of America, but I saw some dark parts of America, an ugly side of America, a side of America that rarely sees the light of day. I refer, of course, to the anus and testicles of my co-star, Ken Davitian.
- On his travels to the United States.