Scenes from a Mall

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Scenes from a Mall is a 1991 satirical film directed by Paul Mazursky with a screenplay by Roger L. Simon and Mazursky, starring Bette Midler and Woody Allen. Woody Allen's character, Nick, is married to author Deborah, played by Midler. After years of a happy marriage, Nick reveals to her he's had an affair. Deborah is shocked and requests a divorce, but later admits she herself has been unfaithful.

Quotes[edit]

[looking for his car in the mall parking garage]

Nick: Where's my fucking Saab?

[after though negotiations with a tennis prodigy's mother]

Nick: I think Mrs. Jong is Jewish.

[on mimes]

Nick: These guys are worse than Hare Krishnas!

[Deborah wants to give Nick his Christmas present]

Deborah: I have something to get you out your midlife crisis.
Nick: Than can only mean a full-body vibrator!

Nick: How many 16th anniversaries does a person have in a lifetime? One... maybe two.

[Nick's given Deborah a family photo with an antique frame]

Nick: I had to have it engraved, because I could never remember your name.

[on an affair Nick had]

Nick: I liked her. I loved the sex.
Deborah: [scornful] Oh. So, you LOVE me, but you only LIKE the sex.

Nick: Well, now I feel like the scumbag of all time.
Deborah: You are.

Nick: I don't know how our marriage lasted.
Deborah: Mutual death wish.

Nick: Your constast interrupting of me...
Deborah: Please! In sixteen years, I've never finished a sequence.

Deborah: No alimony, no special stipends, just plain child support - a LOT of it.

Deborah: How about those two beautiful creatures? Think you can handle them?
Nick: Handle them? I can salivate over them.

Deborah: I betrayed you? You betrayed me! What about your seven month adventure with a girl named Ed?

Nick: You look like my Aunt Minna in that dress!

Deborah: Do you really hate this dress?
Nick: What I really hate is this jacket, this white jacket. I look like a Brazilian gigolo.

Nick: Eleven hundred bucks for Sushi already. That's a lot of dead fish.

External links[edit]

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