# The Berenstain Bears (2003) (season 1)

Seasons: 1 2 3 | Main

The following is a list of quotes from the first season of The Berenstain Bears.

## Season 1

### Trouble at School / Visit the Dentist [1.1]

[first lines of the series, echoing the book the episode was based on]
Brother Bear: When a problem at school is kept secret too long, it can grow until a cub thinks everything is wrong!

[Sister, after bringing Brother make-up math homework, sees Brother still playing with his dinosaur models]
Sister Bear: If you can hold a dinosaur, you can hold a pencil!

Teacher Bob: If you all take your seats, we can all get started on the math test.
[The quiz is about division. It is about division facts --1 through 9. For multiplication, Brother's class learned multiplication facts through 9. Now on division, it was division facts through 9.]

Teacher Bob: Goodbye, kids. See you tomorrow.
[Even though most of the students did great, there was one "F" and that was Brother]
Brother Bear: Uh oh...! This can't be good...!
Teacher Bob: I'm afraid it isn't, Brother!
[Teacher Bob then reveals the division quiz. There is a number "0" on the test. Teacher Bob wrote on the division quiz, VERY POOR! MUST BE SIGNED BY PARENT!. That is, and in other words, "Brother not only got every problem wrong but he also got a great big '0'".]
Brother Bear: Zero?
Teacher Bob: Didn't you study the math worksheets which I sent home with your sister?
Brother Bear: [tries to talk in between coughs] Well, I was pretty sick. It took a lot out of me, including that flu bug.
Teacher Bob: Hmm?
Brother Bear: But I think I should be okay now. And I cannot wait to get those work sheets done!
Teacher Bob: I am happy to hear that.
Brother Bear: Oh, well. I better go and catch the bus.
Teacher Bob: Oh, one more thing. Please have your parents sign the division quiz and turn it in again tomorrow.
Brother Bear: Yes, sir.

[Brother looks at his test which was about division.]
Brother Bear: Even the flu is worse than this!

Brother Bear: Phooey on School Phooey on Math Phooney On Everything!
Brother Bear: Oh No! This Is Terrible What I'm Gonna Do? I Can't Go To School I Can't Go Home [Sighs]
[Brother folds his division quiz into a paper airplane and sails it out so neither him nor his family can see it and it lands near an old log.]

[The scene cuts to Gramps and Gran's dining room. Brother is at their table having milk and chocolate chip cookies.]
Gran: Dear me! This division quiz has more wrinkles than I do.
[Gran flattens out the division quiz and rolls it out with her rolling pin. That is, to get the wrinkles out of the quiz.]
Gran: Well, that is about the best I can do.
Brother Bear: It looks much better than it did. But it still has a great big zero on it!
[By that saying of Brother, the division test is way better than it did. But it still has a big fat "0" on it, in the spite of that.]

[Mama and Papa look at the division quiz. And they find a great big "0" on it.]
Brother Bear: [shows the zero on his division test] I told you it was pretty bad.
Papa Bear: [as he's about to sign the division test] Pretty bad? Can it get any worse than a zero?
Gramps: Well, it can get worse when you don't tell your parents and don't get on the school bus.
Brother Bear: That's for sure.

Cousin Freddy: I had no idea so many gooey gums can fit into one bag.
Brother Bear: Well, this way I'll have enough to last a while.
Cousin Freddy: A while? You'll have enough to last until next year.

Mama Bear: You'd better make sure you put your tooth under your pillow tonight.
Sister Bear: Why?
Brother Bear: Why? For the tooth fairy, of course.
Sister Bear: No way! This is my first tooth. I'm keeping it!
[Mama and Brother start laughing]

### The Mighty Milton/Mama's New Job [1.2]

Mama Bear: I've got a job! I'm going to start my own quilt-making business!
Papa Bear, Brother Bear and Sister Bear: Huh?!

### Go To School / The Week at Grandma's [1.3]

Mama Bear: Oh dear, you've worked yourself into a tizzy!
Sister Bear: Mama, I don't want to go to school, I want to stay home with you! I could help you make pies!
Papa Bear: Did somebody say "pie"? I've got the apples an' Shift Cars. All I need is someone with pie-making know how.
Mama Bear: I have an easy recipe for pie. You've followed recipes before, Papa!
Papa Bear: Uh, but not for pie.......I can't make pies!
Mama Bear: Well, I've got a photo album to find.
Brother Bear: Why are you getting the photo album out, Mama?
Mama Bear: I was just thinking back to when Sister was as worried about going to kindergarten, as she is about going to third grade.
Sister Bear: I loved kindergarten!
Mama Bear: Well, yes. Once you got there you did.
Sister Bear: Miss Honey Bear was really nice, and that's where I met Lizzie, and they had lots of toys, and...
Mama Bear: [chuckles] Yes, yes. That's right, Sister. But you didn't know all those things before you went, you were very worried.

Brother Bear: Do you know what a synonym is?
[Sister mistakenly believes Brother said "cinnamon"]
Sister Bear: Uh-huh. It is my favorite spice. Like synonym toast and synonym rolls.
Brother Bear: That is "cinnamon". I said "synonyms".

Sister Bear: I don't want to go to kindergarten, Mama. I want to stay here with you!
Mama Bear: Sister, I know new things can sometimes be upsetting. But if we don't try them, we don't grow and learn. That's what kindergarten is all about.
Sister Bear: What if the teacher doesn't like me?
Mama Bear: Why wouldn't she like you? You're a very likeable cub!
Brother Bear: Yeah, well most of the time.
Mama Bear: I know Miss Honey Bear will be happy to have you in her kindergarten class.
Sister Bear: But I can't go tomorrow! I'm too busy.
Mama Bear: [gasps] Too busy?
Sister Bear: I promised Brother I'd make a picture.
Brother Bear: You can make me a picture at kindergarten, Sister. They've got lots of paint, and crayons, and every color you can think of.
Sister Bear: But I want to hear my storybooks!
Mama Bear: They have lots of books at kindergarten, too. With stories you haven't heard before.
Sister Bear: I was going to build something with my blocks.
Papa Bear: They have enough blocks to build a castle at kindergarten. That was one of Brother's things about school.
Brother Bear: There's a tub of blocks bigger than you.
Mama Bear: What do you say, Sister? Can you give kindergarten a try?

Mama Bear: And so, you went with Brother on the bus for your first day of school.

Sister Bear: Is it all right if I sit here?
Lizzie: Uh-huh!
[When they get to school]
Miss Honey Bear: Welcome to Bear Country School. My name is Miss Honey Bear, and I'm your new kindergarten teacher! Would you like to come inside and meet your new classmates?
[When it is time for recess]
Mama Bear: [gasps]
Sister Bear: Mama! Why are you here?
Mama Bear: Oh, I just thought I would stop by to see how you were doing.
Sister Bear: I'm having fun! Brother was right, they do have lots of paint colors, more than a hundred!
Mama Bear: [chuckles] Is that right?
Sister Bear: And they do have a big tub of blocks, just like Papa said. Lizzie and I built a giant castle!
Mama Bear: Lizzie?
Sister Bear: Uh-huh! She's my new friend!
Lizzie: New best friend!
Mama Bear: Pleased to meet you, Lizzie!
Lizzie: Hi, we're having recess!
Mama Bear: And what do you do at recess?
Sister Bear: Um, do you know?
Lizzie: This is my first one!
Mama Bear: [chuckles] I'll help you get started! Come on over to the swings and I'll push you.
Sister Bear: OK!
Lizzie: That's a good idea!

Brother Bear: Huh?
Sister Bear: Suitcases?
Mama Bear: So our reservations for Grizzly Mountain Lodge are all set? Thank you so much, see you soon.
Brother Bear: Reservations?
Brother Bear and Sister Bear: We're going on vacation!
Mama Bear: Well, actually, it's a second honeymoon.
Brother Bear: Still sounds like fun.
Sister Bear: Mmmm...especially the honey part.
Papa Bear: I haven't seen these in ages. I wonder if my serve is still...... [grunts] Ow!
Brother Bear: Papa, are you okay?
Sister Bear: Maybe you should just let Brother and me play tennis on the honeymoon.
Brother Bear: And you and Mama can keep score.
Mama Bear: Sorry, sweeties, but honeymoons aren't for cubs. Honeymoons are special trips that couples go on after they get married. It's an old tradition.
Papa Bear: Grizzly Mountain Lodge is where Mama and I went on our first honeymoon.
Brother Bear: But, what about us?
Mama Bear: Well, you're going on a special trip of your own.
Brother Bear: Is it Grizzly World?
Sister Bear: Is it Honeycomb Amusement Park?
Mama Bear: You're going to grandma's.
Brother Bear and Sister Bear: Gran's?
Brother Bear: That should do it. Board games, books, yo-yo. I wonder if I should bring my chemistry set.
Sister Bear: I'm bringing puzzles, coloring books, and teddy.
Papa Bear: Beep beep. Coming through! Hey, what's all this doing out here?
Brother Bear: Well, we are going to Gran's for a whole week. We need to keep busy.
Mama Bear: [chuckles] Come on, now. You always have fun at Gran's house without all this stuff!
Brother Bear: When we go for one afternoon, maybe. [whispers to Mama Bear] and Gran and Gramps are, well, old.
Sister Bear: Maybe they'll want to take naps all day.
Papa Bear: [grunts]
Sister Bear: Papa, what about our toys?
Papa Bear: You won't need all those. You're going to have too much fun with Gran and Gramps. I wonder if the lodge still has canoe rides on the lake.
Mama Bear: And live music in the dance hall.
Brother Bear: [sighs] Mama and Papa are going to have all the fun.
Sister Bear: And we're going to have none.
Gran: See you next week. Drive safely.
Mama Bear: Bye.
Papa Bear: Have fun.
Gran: Come on, cubs.

### The Trouble With Pets / The Sitter [1.4]

Sister Bear: I want something that is warm and cuddly.
Brother Bear: If you want a pet that's warm and cuddly, you should just get your old blanket.
Sister Bear: Well, if you want a pet that's cold and slimy, you should get some slime.

Mama Bear: Looking after a puppy is a round-the-clock job.
Papa Bear: It isn't something you can just put off until later when it's more convenient.

### Too Much TV / Trick or Treat [1.5]

Papa Bear: What's this? A lovely lady dining alone? May I join you for lunch, Mrs. Bear?
Mama Bear: Be my guest. The cubs aren't interested.
Papa Bear: Oh? Where are they?
Mama Bear: Eating in front of that television. It used to be a treat. And now they do it every day!
Brother Bear: Give it to me!
Sister Bear: No way! It's my turn to choose! WE'RE NOT WATCHING "BEAR WRESTLING"!
Brother Bear: THERE'S NO WAY I'M WATCHING "LITTLE TREEHOUSE ON THE PRAIRIE"!
Mama Bear: OKAY, THAT'S IT!
[Brother and Sister jump from their fighting, drop the TV remote, and the TV remote flies out of their hands.]
Cubs: Aah!
[Mama catches the TV remote.]
Mama Bear: NO TV FOR A WEEK!
[She turns off the television with the remote.]
Brother Bear: What?!
Sister Bear: But, Mama...!
Mama Bear: No, sir, I mean it.
Sister Bear: Papa, Mama told us we can't watch TV for a whole week.
Papa Bear: Your Mama's got a point. You two cubs have been watching far too much television lately. Now, if you don't mind, I'm just going to catch some of the hockey playoffs. Huh?
[Mama takes the TV remote from Papa.]
Mama Bear: [turns to Papa] You too, Papa! [then to the rest of her family] For once, the whole family is going to be TV-free!
Papa Bear: Oh...!
Brother Bear: Oh...!

Papa Bear: [sees a wrestling show while in his workshop] HA! I didn't see that coming!
Mama Bear: [off-screen] And you didn't see me coming!

Mama Bear: Rain or no rain! "No TV for a week!", means "No TV for a week!".

Brother Bear: We'll go here, and here.
Sister Bear: Don't forget this house. They always give out Crispy Squares.
Brother Bear: Mm-mmm, love those Crispy Squares.
Mama Bear: What are you cubs up to?
Brother Bear: It's a trick-or-treat map.
Sister Bear: We're figuring out which houses to visit tonight.
Brother Bear: We're going to Farmer Ben's house and then Mrs. Grizzle's; she usually makes special Halloween cookies.
Sister Bear: And then Teacher Jane's. She gives out good stuff.
Brother Bear: And we'll go to Dr. Grizzly's house, even though she gives out healthy snacks.
Sister Bear: Just to be polite.
Mama Bear: [laughing]
Sister Bear: And then Gramps and Gran. They always have lots of candy for us.
Mama Bear: Hmm, it looks like you missed Widder Jones' house.
Brother Bear: Oh, we did that on purpose.
Mama Bear: You did? Why?
Brother Bear: [to Mama; talking about Widder Jones] Because she's a witch!
Mama Bear: Oh, nonsense! She's very sweet and kindhearted.
Brother Bear: Mama, I'm talking about the Widder Jones who lives on Crooked Lane. That Widder Jones.
Mama Bear: Yes, I know who you mean. We take a quilting class together. She's very friendly and helpful.
Brother Bear: [whispering to Sister Bear] Until she turns you into a statue.
Mama Bear: In fact, I saw her at the market today. She's preparing a very special treat for all the trick-or-treaters. And when you get home, I want to hear that you've paid Widder Jones a visit. Remember not to judge someone by their appearance.

Skuzz: We're going to put the trick back in Trick or Treating.

Sister Bear: Mama wouldn't be friends with a witch now, would she?
Brother Bear: Hmm, I suppose you're right.

Brother Bear: It’s Too Tall and his gang! They’re not here for the Treats, just the tricks!
Widder Jones: I understand perfectly! And I am more than happy to oblige. Watch this!
[Widder Jones pulls a rope, Too-Tall, Smirk and Skuzz pop out of a bush and Vampire bats swarm them.]
Too Tall: Watch Out! Vampire bats! They’re after us!
Smirk: Aah! Get away!
Skuzz: Aah! They’re gonna get us!
All: [Laughing]
Brother Bear: Wow! That’ll teach them!
Lizzy: But, they’re still coming back!
Widder Jones: Maybe they wants some more tricks!
[Widder Jones pulls another rope, Too-Tall and his gang pop out from behind a tree, as ghosts appear.]
Too-Tall and his Gang: Ghosts! [Screaming].
All: [Laughing].
Widder Jones: So, Brother. How would you like to play the final trick!
Brother Bear: Okay.
Widder Jones: Just turn this on and watch the fun!
Brother: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1! [Flicks a switch]
Skuzz: This isn't much fun as I thought it would be!
[Suddenly, skeletons appear out of nowhere.]
Too-Tall and his Gang: [Screaming].
Too-Tall: Let’s get out of here!
All: [Laughing].

### The Trouble With Money / The Double Dare [1.6]

Mama Bear: Sometimes when people are so busy working hard, they can forget about other important things in their lives.
Papa Bear: Even mamas and papas forget about very important things.

Brother Bear: I guess I've been too busy.
Cousin Fred: That's a surprise!

Sister Bear: Brother, Brother!
Brother Bear: What's wrong, Sis?
Sister Bear: Too-Tall and his gang, they took my jump rope! I tried to get them to give it back! But they are still not going to give it to me!
Brother Bear: THREE AGAINST ONE! AND YOU ARE ONLY HALF THEIR SIZE! I CANNOT BELIEVE THOSE GUYS!
Sister Bear: You think you can get it back for me?
[Brother --angrily-- runs off to the park to find the bullies Too-Tall, Smirk and Skuzz.]
Brother Bear: JUST TRY AND STOP ME! (AND THEY BETTER GIVE IT BACK OR ELSE! I MEAN, "WHEN I GET BACK THAT JUMP ROPE, I AM GOING TO LET TOO-TALL AND HIS TWO FRIENDS HAVE IT!")
[He goes off --snarling to himself. And he threatens that he is going to let Too-Tall, Smirk, and Skuzz have it if they do not give Sister back her jump rope. In fact, he thinks about letting Too-Tall and his gang --his two friends Smirk and Skuzz-- have it right now.]

[Too-Tall --after he and his two friends Smirk and Skuzz had stolen Sister's jump rope-- was jumping with Sister's jump rope until Brother showed up.]
Too-Tall: Tell you what, Brother! You want it back? Come and get it!
Brother Bear: All right! I am doing that!
[Brother attempts to cross the log bridge.]
Skuzz: ONE FALSE MOVE AND YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE A CHILLY SWIM!

[Farmer Ben --unnoticed at first-- uses himself like a scarecrow. Brother Bear and the big cubs --Too-Tall, Smirk, and Skuzz-- think he is a scarecrow --and that there is a real scarecrow in the melon patch-- in the spite of that. That is, although they fail to notice him. He uses himself as a scarecrow --having his eyes shut, arms spread out, and feet together. That is, as if there really is a scarecrow in his watermelon patch. So Farmer Ben --striking the pose-- pretends to be a scarecrow. Brother --after picking out the biggest and greenest skinned watermelon-- gets the melon off the vine, breaks the stem off of it, and picks it up. But when he picks up the melon, Farmer Ben moves a little by smiling, opens his eyes, and --offscreen-- undoes his scarecrow pose. Then he --as if returning back to his normal self-- runs up to Brother and catches him.]
Farmer Ben: GOTCHA!
[Brother Bear tries to run away --only to be tightly grabbed by Farmer Ben.]
Brother Bear: HELP! LET ME GO!
[The scene cuts to Too-Tall and his two friends --Smirk and Skuzz. When they see that Brother is caught by Farmer Ben, they run away.]
Too-Tall: RUN FOR IT!
[Too-Tall and his gang run away screaming. Farmer Ben does not notice Too-Tall and his friends --Smirk and Skuzz-- but he talks to Brother about the dee-double dare incident.]
Farmer Ben: BROTHER BEAR?! WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU DOING STEALING WATERMELONS WITH TOO-TALL AND HIS NO GOOD GANG?!
[As Farmer Ben says this, he wants to know what in the Earth Brother Bear --stealing Too-Tall-- is doing with that watermelon.]
Brother Bear: First they dared me...! And then, they double dared me...! AND FINALLY, THEY DEE DOUBLE DARED ME!
Farmer Ben: That dee double dare is so hard to resist.
Brother Bear: I wanted to walk away. But then they called me chicken! I am sorry, Farmer Ben.

[Brother comes back to Too-Tall, Smirk, and Skuzz with a watermelon slice that Farmer Ben gave him.]
Too-Tall: Brother?! You got away with it! And you got the watermelon.
Skuzz: Way to go.
Smirk: You're the man!
Too-Tall: Come on, we're going to have more fun at the Widder Jones' house.
Brother Bear: No way.
Too-Tall: [as he and his gang stops walking] Oh, really? well, I dare you to come with us.
Brother Bear: Not this time.
Too-Tall: Okay, then, I double dare you.
Brother Bear: Nope. Not interested.
Too-Tall: What the matter? Chicken?
[Smirk and Skuzz are miming like chickens]
Brother Bear: I'm not chicken, and I'm not a sheep either.
Too-Tall: Okay Brother...! I DEE DOUBLE DARE YOU TO COME WITH US TO THE WIDDER JONES'S HOUSE!
Brother Bear: That stuff may have worked before, but it won't now! [he heads back to the treehouse] See you later. I'm going home.
[Brother --after saying this-- knows he is going to get in trouble if he listens to Too-Tall, Smirk, and Skuzz and goes to the Widder Jones's house.]

[Farmer Ben comes rustling through the bushes. He approaches Too-Tall, Smirk, and Skuzz and talks to them about the dee-double dare incident --which they put on Brother-- and going into his watermelon patch.]
Farmer Ben: [to Too-Tall and his gang about the watermelon patch] TOO-TALL...! IF I CATCH YOU OR ANY OF YOUR GANG IN MY WATERMELON PATCH AGAIN, YOUR PARENTS ARE GOING TO HEAR FROM ME! NOW GET ON HOME!
[By that saying of Farmer Ben, he says to Too-Tall, Smirk, and Skuzz that if he ever catches them in his watermelon patch again, all of their parents are going to hear from him. Too-Tall, Smirk, and Skuzz --when they hear the warning from Farmer Ben-- get shocked into silence.]
Smirk: [stammers heavily] We're...! We're sorry, Farmer Ben.
Skuzz: [also stammering heavily] Thank you, Farmer Ben. It...! It’ll never happen again.
Too-Tall: Oh please don't tell our parents...!
[Too-Tall, Smirk and Skuzz --after hearing the warning-- run away screaming.]
Farmer Ben: [chuckles] Those cubs make my chickens look tough.

### Out For The Team / Count Their Blessings [1.7]

Brother Bear: Why did Sister sign up for baseball tryouts anyway? Why couldn't she be good at something else? Baseball is my game, not hers.

Papa Bear: Well, Mama. It feels good to have raised two star athletes!
Mama Bear: It sure does, Papa.

Mama Bear: I know what I'm going to have to listen to when Sister gets home: "Gee, Mama, Lizzie has so many Bearbie dolls. She even has Cruise Ship Bearbie with outfits. Why can't I have more Bearbies than one? And that's just Lizzie."
Papa Bear: Hmm, talking to yourself, huh? Certainly not a very good sign.
Mama Bear: Oh, you're right. I am being silly. But Sister is playing Bearbies with Lizzy again and I know exactly what's going to happen when she gets home.
Papa Bear: Oh, what's that?
Mama Bear: It's the same every time. She complains she doesn't have all the things her friends have. With Lizzie, it's Bearbies. With Anna, it's a phone in her bedroom. And Queenie has a TV and a phone in her room.
Papa Bear: Hey, I don't even have a TV in my room! Hmm. But Sister does have a Bearbie and a whole lot of things her friends don't have.
Mama Bear: I know, but she just thinks about what she doesn't have.
Papa Bear: And I suppose it won't be as much different with Brother when he gets home from Cousin Fred's.
Mama Bear: We'll hear all about the video games Freddy has.
Papa Bear: Right, but he won't talk about the soccer ball or action figures he does have.
Mama Bear: Never mind the large pile of comic books up in his room.
Papa Bear: Nope, he won't mention those at all.
Mama Bear: Oh, you missed a spot.
Papa Bear: Hey! How did I end up with this job?

Papa Bear: Cubs... Cubs... Cubs!
Mama Bear: Listen to yourselves. All you can do is complain about what you don't have.
Papa Bear: What about being thankful for all the things you do have?
Cubs: Huh?
Mama Bear: It's called counting your blessings.
Sister Bear: Blessings?
Brother Bear: Like what?

### The Slumber Party / The Homework Hassle [1.8]

Queenie: Did I hear you say you're having a slumber party? Can I come?
Lizzie: Sure you can come. What's one more?

[Echoing from the book version --comparable in the TV adaptation-- things calmed down pretty quickly after that. The sleepover was cancelled. Parents were called. Lizzy was sent to bed and forbidden from leaving her room. And a very angry and disappointed Mama Bear came to take Sister home.]
Mama Bear: [to Sister] Sister, I am so angry and disappointed!
[The scene cuts to the treehouse. In this scene, Mama leads Sister into the house. As she leads Sister in, she says...!]
Mama Bear: [continuing] You are grounded, young lady! One day in your room and one full week in the house!
[After Mama says this, she leads Sister inside, and Sister is doubly grounded. It is one day in her room and one full week in the house. And she can only leave the house to go to school and --while grounded-- can only see her friends during school hours, but she can't leave her room early or call her friends on another slumber party. Then the scene cuts to Papa in the bear family's living room.]
[Mama turns to Papa and tells him about the Bruin family's living room. It is if he --Papa-- had seen the Bruin family's living room caused by Sister, Lizzy, and the other girls. That is, as she --Mama-- says...!]
Mama Bear: [to Papa] You should have seen the place! Popcorn stuck to everything, juice spills all over the carpet, furniture was knocked this way and that! It was a complete and absolute disgrace! Everything that I said about privilege and responsibility, in one ear and out the other!
Papa Bear: Sister does have to share the blame, but it sounds to me like there were quite a few at this slumber party. Hmm, maybe it was one of those situations where one thing led to another and things got out of control. I’m sure it wouldn't have gotten out of hand if the Bruins had been home.
Mama Bear: If we knew they were going out, we could’ve suggested that Sister attend a sleepover some other time or that the girls have the sleepover here.
Papa Bear: Hmm, but we didn’t. It was our responsibility to call them. And part of the responsibility that comes with the privilege of having cubs.
Mama Bear: So we’re partially to blame.
Papa Bear: I guess both privilege and responsibility go for parents as well as for cubs.
Sister Bear: Mama.
Mama Bear: Sister, we talked about this. I said I didn't want to see you out of your room. But I like to make it up to you.
Sister Bear: That may be true. But I know your mad. And I know what I did is wrong. So that's why I want to be... Not grounded?

Queenie: This was a good idea for us all to come over and help clean up, Sister.
Lizzie: Hey, I know. Everyone's doing such a good job. I think we should make this a clean up party.
Sister Bear: Let's not Lizzie. And if you don't mind, I rather not hear the word "party" again for a long time.

Mama Bear: [echoing the book the episode was based on] If you're a bear for TV, loud music, eat popcorn and fun, how are you gonna get your homework done?

[Mama --after she finds garbage in Brother's backpack including a brown apple core, a rotten banana peel and a moldy piece of bread--she picks up the letter and reads it. It is a letter from Brother's teacher--Teacher Bob.]
Letter from Teacher Bob: I regret to report that Brother Bear has fallen too bar behind with his homework.
Yours truly,
Teacher Bob
Mama Bear: [reads the letter from Teacher Bob] Dear Parent,
I regret to inform you...!
[Then she turns to Papa. Papa takes the letter, and he reads the letter too. After Mama reads the first part of the letter, Papa--after Mama hands him the letter--reads the rest of it.]
Papa Bear: [reading the letter] (...that Brother Bear has fallen too far behind in his homework.
Yours truly,
Teacher Bob)
Mama Bear: [to Papa] It looks like you and I better have a talk with our son.

Papa Bear: You're not reading much of anything, according to this letter from your teacher.
Brother Bear: I, uh...
Papa Bear: It says here that you've fallen way behind in your homework.
Sister Bear: Maybe Brother's too busy with other things, like girls.
Brother Bear: I am not!
Mama Bear: Sister, that is quite enough.
Brother Bear: Yes! Go and do your own homework!
Brother Bear: That's because your homework is easy!
Sister Bear: IS NOT!
Brother Bear: IS TOO!
Mama Bear: Stop that now, both of you. Let's figure out what the problem is.
Brother Bear: I'll tell you what the problem is: I have too much homework! There's English and math and there's science and history and... Oh...! Every subject for every day until it's coming out of my ears!
Papa Bear: Is that so? Have you been doing your homework every day?
Brother Bear: Well, no, not really, no.
Papa Bear: If you did a little bit of homework every day, it wouldn't pile up to a mountain of work. Which is what you have here!
Brother Bear: Oh...!
Mama Bear: I'm afraid Papa's right. There are going to have to be some changes around here.
Brother Bear: Like what?
Papa Bear: Like no more music, no more TV, no more talking on the phone.
Sister Bear: What about video games, Papa?
Papa Bear: And no more video games until you're all caught up with your homework! (It is up to you and your homework until you are all caught up!)
Brother Bear: But you don't understand, that may be forever!
Papa Bear: Then you better get started. (Be done with your homework too fast, and you may still be fallen way behind.)
[Not only is Brother going to still fall behind if he gets his homework done too fast. His grades may still fall even if he gets the answers right without cheating and gets a perfect grade like an "A+".]
Brother Bear: Oh...!
Papa Bear: Where are you going?
Brother Bear: I'm just going outside to see the sunlight and... smell the fresh air one last time.

Brother Bear: And now I can't watch TV or play video games or do anything, not until I get caught up with my homework. (And if I am done with my homework too fast, I might still be fallen way behind.)
Gramps: Hmm. Well, that doesn't sound too unreasonable to me.
Brother Bear: But Papa doesn't understand! I'm so far behind! I'll never catch up!
Gran: I know that the situation seems terrible right now. But you're going to catch up.
Brother Bear: What do you mean?
Gramps: The same thing which happened to him when he was a young cub.
Gran: Of course there was no television way back then.
Brother Bear: No television?!
Gramps: Oh no! We had radio instead. (But radio was like TV at that time.) In the old days you could listen to fantastic stories every evening.
Gran: And your father loved to listen to the radio while he was doing his homework. And his favorite show was "Jet Bear George of the Space Frontier".
Gramps: Only, the more interested he became in the radio, the further he fell behind in his schoolwork. And I made sure he got it done. I clamped down on him the same way he has been clamping down on you.
Brother Bear: Maybe Papa does understand. And I guess that I have not been doing a good job with keeping up on my homework lately.
Gramps: Well, the worst you can do with your homework is put it off until later.
Gran: Of course. It's called "procrastination".
Brother Bear: Pro-crast-a-what?
Gran: Procrastination. That means "putting off a job until tomorrow". It's when you know that a job should be done today.
Gramps: You're right. So, from then on, Papa buckled down and did his homework every day. And (even though he was never again allowed on the radio again) he did his homework and became a much better student.
[By that saying of Gramps, Papa did his homework and became a much better student. That is, even though he lost the radio privileges forever for falling behind with his homework. But in the spite of that, he improved by always doing his homework. And he became a much better student.]
Brother Bear: I understand, Gramps. But how am I ever going to get caught up?
Gramps: Well, you might ask Teacher Bob to give you a catch-up period. I think he should go along with that. He's a pretty good guy.
Brother Bear: That's a good idea. But the first thing that I must do is go home and get some of it done today.
Gramps: That's the spirit.
Brother Bear: If Papa was able to do it, then so can I.
[Like how Papa got the radio privileges taken away from him forever, Brother might get the TV and video game privileges taken away from him forever too. But he --in the spite of that-- may become a better student when he does his homework.]

### The Talent Show / The Haunted Lighthouse [1.9]

Teacher Bob: I believe that everyone has a special talent, but sometimes it can take a little help to find out what it is.

Brother Bear: [to Too-Tall] You want to be in the talent show?
Cousin Fred: Does having the hairiest knuckles count as a talent?
Too-Tall: Very funny.

Brother Bear: Hey! there's something outside!
Papa Bear: Huh?
Mama Bear: Huh?
[They all look outside the window]
Brother Bear: Really, something was there! I saw it! It was glowing.
Mama Bear: [laughs] My guess would be it was your glowing imagination.

Sister Bear: This looks like a job for...
Brother Bear and Sister Bear: The Bear Detectives.

Brother Bear: We knew you were special, Captain Salt.
Sister Bear: You just needed to know it too.

### The Birthday Boy / The Green-Eyed Monster [1.10]

Sister Bear: Little Lady, no! Hey! No! Stop!
Lizzie: Maybe you can make a movie about Brother.
Sister Bear: What's so special about him? He's just a brother.

Mama Bear: Showing someone how you feel about them can be the greatest gift of all.
Papa Bear: And you don't even have to wrap it.

Papa Bear: Your car is running, Mr. Bruin.
Mr. Bruin: Yes, I guess I should be happy it's running at all.
Mama Bear: No, Mr. Bruin, he means it's running away!

Sister Bear: Is the green-eyed monster still knocking, Papa?
Papa Bear: Yep, but I won't let him in.

Green-Eyed Monster: [to Sister] Don't you think it's not fair that Brother gets the pretty bike and you get an old bike?!

Sister Bear: [riding on Brother's bicycle] I knew this bike wasn't too big for me!

### The Baby Chipmunk / The Wishing Star [1.11]

Sister Bear: All Brown Eyes does is eat and sleep.
Mama Bear: Well, that's what babies do. When they aren't eating and sleeping, ...
Sister Bear: [giggles] They're sleeping and eating.
Mama Bear: Exactly.

Mama Bear: They say the first star you see at night you can make a wish on. That's why it's called the wishing star.

Papa Bear: It's really amazing how hard work and determination can magically give you what you deserve.

### Get the Gimmies / Lost In A Cave [1.12]

Mama Bear: [echoing the book the episode was based on] When a cub's behavior takes a turn for the worst, it is hard for parents to know what to do first.

Mama Bear: Now, remember what I told you in the car. We're here to buy groceries, that's all. So no asking for toys and treats. Is that understood? Huh?
Papa Bear: Uh-oh, it looks like we're off to a bad start.

Brother Bear: I want one of those rings, Mama.
Sister Bear: I want some stickers.
Mama Bear: Now, what did I just tell you on the way here?
Brother Bear: Uh... Um... Well...
Sister Bear: I forget.
Mama Bear: ugh. That we are not here to buy treats. Now come along. Why, isn't that nice?
Papa Bear: Mm-hmm, it is a fine idea.
Brother Bear: What's a fine idea?
Mama Bear: The store has put these donation displays here to remind everyone to give to the different charities in our community.
Papa Bear: You two might think about donating some of the toys you've outgrown to the Sick Cubs Hospital.
Brother Bear: Hey, what's that?
Sister Bear: Oh.
Brother Bear: Look! New marshmallow-chocolate-covered bears!
Mama Bear: You know the answer. Now put those back.
Brother Bear: Okay.
Sister Bear: Alright.
Mama Bear: I can see that this shopping trip is going to be the same as all the others.
Papa Bear: Hmm? Marshmallow and chocolate...? Aah!

Brother Bear: Wow! Neat! A glow-in-the-dark flyer! This would be lots of fun to play with at night. Can I get it?
Mama Bear: No. I've told you not more than ten minutes ago that....
Sister Bear:: Mama? Papa? Can I get this?
Papa Bear: An apple? Sure.
Sister Bear: Thanks!
Papa Bear: Oh, careful now, you'll bruise it!
Sister Bear: It's not a real apple, Papa, it's bouncy fruit. Neat, huh? They've got bouncy oranges and bouncy pears and bouncy bananas.
Brother Bear: Hey, if Sister can have bouncy fruit, then I can have this!
Mama Bear: Now listen, you two! It's not your birthday! And it's not Christmas! And it's not "Give Your Cubs a Treat" day! So you can stop goofing off and put these toys back right now!
Cubs: Oh...!
Papa Bear: Give Your Cubs a Treat Day? When is that?
Mama Bear: There's no such thing. But the way Brother and Sister carry on, you'd think it was every day of the year.

Papa Bear: Now, just hold on! We didn't come here to buy toys!
Mama Bear: Papa's right. Remember what I told you about buying toys and treats?
Brother Bear: But that was when we were getting our groceries. We're finished now.
Sister Bear: And look at how cute they are! Please, please, may we have one?
Guy: Oh, come on, folks. Why don't you buy your cubs a treat?
Sister Bear: Oh, Papa, I'd appreciate it ever, ever so much!
Woman: Oh, my, she is such an adorable little cub!
Man: How could you say no to a face like that?
Papa Bear: But... I... OH! ALL RIGHT!
Guy: Thank you very much, sir, and have a great day.
Papa Bear: You’re welcome.
Brother Bear: Thanks, Papa.
Sister Bear: Thank you, Papa.
Papa Bear: OF ALL THE OUTRAGEOUS, EMBARRASSING, SHAMEFUL BEHAVIOR! THAT WAS THE WORST CASE OF THE GALLOPING GIMMIES I HAVE EVER SEEN!
Mama Bear: You're right, Papa. But perhaps it's partly our fault for giving in.
Papa Bear: WELL, WHAT MORE DO YOU THINK WE COULD'VE DONE WITH ALL THOSE STRANGERS STARING AT US!? NOW I THINK IT'S TIME THAT WE HAD A TALK WITH OUR CUBS! BROTHER...? SISTER...?
Cubs: Yes, Papa?
Papa Bear: Into the living room, please. It's time for a family meeting. There are more important things in this world than getting as many treats that you can get your hands on. Greedy cubs who only think of themselves can never really be happy. Do you know why?
Cubs: No.
Papa Bear: Because you can’t have everything you want in life all the time. Do you understand?
Cubs: Yes.
Mama Bear: And furthermore, it's good to think of others sometimes instead of just yourselves.
Brother Bear: OK.
Sister Bear: We will.
Papa Bear: Good.

Gramps: Hi, there!
Brother Bear: What did you bring us?
Sister Bear: Yeah, what did you bring us?
Papa Bear: I can't believe you two! You didn't even say hello. Now, that's That. Up to your room. And there will be treats for a week. A month! A year!
Gramps: You're having a Bad day, son?
Papa Bear: I'm sorry about the pleasant welcome. But Brother and Sister have had a bad case of the galloping greedy gimmies.
Mama Bear: The worst case yet.
Gramps: Worst case, eh? I think I've seen worse.
Papa Bear: Well, I'm not surprised. They've probably made quite a spectacle of themselves over at your house.
Gramps: Actually, I was talking about you.
Papa Bear: Me? I had the gimmies?
Brother Bear: Papa had the gimmies?
Gramps: Yep, I'm afraid it's true. But eventually, you turned around.
Gran: I remember the day it happened.
Gramps: So do I. It was at old Rufe Grizzly's General Store. We were buying our groceries and you got the gimmies.
Gran: You made such a fuss over a truck that it was downright embarrassing.
Brother Bear: Like how we fussed about those kitty cats.
Sister Bear: And embarrassed Papa.
Papa Bear: Well, I'm glad that you didn't give in.
Gramps: Oh, I'm afraid we did.
Papa Bear: Oh?
Gramps: You got what you wanted that day. But then, as we were leaving, you noticed a family that barely had enough to put food on the counter. Seeing those folks and how little they had somehow got you to thinking.
Papa Bear: And I gave that cub my truck! I remember that!
Mama Bear: Oh, I love that story!
Sister Bear: Me too! Oops.
Brother Bear: We're sorry about how we acted.
Sister Bear: I wish we could just start this whole day over again.

Sister Bear: [to Gramps and Gran] Yes. And if you have brought us something (toys or treats), you can just leave it in the car. Because we are not even thinking about it.

Papa Bear: You never can tell what a cave is going to be like on the inside, just like from what it looks like on the outside.

Brother Bear: Look! Wow! Real, live fossils.
Cousin Fred: Maybe a million years ago they were alive!

Brother Bear: Things that seem scary really aren't, once you know what they really are.
Cousin Fred: I know. There's a logical explanation for everything.
Brother Bear: Exactly! [his voice echoes]

### Too Much Junk Food / Go To Camp [1.13]

Dr. Grizzly: Exercise is an important part of a healthy lifestyle.
Papa Bear: [panting] I agree with you, one hundred percent.

Sister Bear: [panting] Gees, I don't get this tired when I play baseball.
Brother Bear: Well, you're running much farther than second base, Sis.

Brother Bear: What about sugar balls.
Sister Bear: And Choco Chums
Papa Bear: And Sweetsie Cola.
Dr. Grizzly: Sweets and goodies don't give you the kind of nourishment your body needs.
Papa Bear: Well cubs, it's time for us to get our trains back on the track.
Sister Bear: You're right, Papa. [Sister starts chugging and whistling like a train]
Papa Bear: Whoo-whoo! [looking back toward Brother; chuckles] Get on board, son. Whoo-whoo!
Brother Bear: I... I think I'll walk. I need the exercise.

Papa Bear: I have an idea. Why not we go and celebrate by opening up the freezer and...?
Mama Bear: Uh-uh-uh, it is far too easy to fall back into the junk food habit.
Brother Bear: Well, celebrate with carrot sticks.
Sister Bear: And nuts and raisins.

Sister Bear: Do you think this sleep-out is a good idea?
Brother Bear: No.
Sister Bear: Oh, good.
Brother Bear: I think it's a great idea!