The Boss Baby
The Boss Baby is a 2017 American 3D computer-animated comedy film about a baby who is a secret agent in the secret war between babies and puppies.
- Directed by Tom McGrath. Written by Michael McCullers, loosely based on the 2010 picture book of the same name written and illustrated by Marla Frazee.
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Boss Baby
[edit]- Let's just say, I'm the boss.
- (to Jimbo) PUT THAT COOKIE DOWN! Cookies are for closers.
- Upsies. l need upsies.
Tim
[edit]- No, Ted and Janice. You don't even know their names. You're just trying to steal them from me! You stole everything! You are the one who should be in jail!
- I don't want your filthy money.
- Hang on to your diaper!
Francis Francis
[edit]- And we are on schedule to release the most adorable puppy ever. We're gonna launch it at the pet convention in Las Vegas! Watch out, world! It's gonna crush the competition!
- We're gonna launch a brand new puppy in every continent. In every country! We're going to take over the world, one heart at a time. Imagine a puppy that never grows up, never gets old. A puppy that stays a puppy forever. I give you the only thing you'll ever love, the Forever Puppy!
Ted
[edit]- How would you like to have a baby brother?
- It is Take Your Kid to Work Day.
Janice
[edit]- Rise and shine!
- You are officially un-grounded!
Wizzie
[edit]- [repeated line] Wake up, little halflings! It's 7:00 a.m.
- Arise for a nutritious breakfast! It's 7:00 a.m.
- Oh, what's wrong, Timothy? Has that little dwarf made you blue?
- Then I shall cast upon him a great curse! He shall not pass!
- Perhaps your parents need to be enlightened. With a great curse! They shall not pass!
- Expose his dark magic!
- We could buy a bouncy house! Godspeed, Tim! It's 8:45 a.m.
- It's okay, little halfling. Perhaps I can be of some assistance. Blackbird singing in the dead of night! Pray, take these broken wings and learn to fly! Fly, you fools!
- If only I could reach my magical shank. I could break us out of this big house.
- [Tim: What's the point, Wizzie?] Because it's 7:00 a.m. I have one job to do, and you make it so difficult.
- It's okay, little halfling. Sometimes, I get confused too. Especially during daylight savings time. Spring forward, fall back. We don't even have calendars in the wizard's realm! There is no spring, only darkness and winter!
- [After the end credits, the alarm clock goes off] Wake up, little halflings! It is time to leave. Go and live your peasant lives. [flailing his arms up and down] BE GONE WITH YOU!!!
Plot
[edit]Seven-year-old Tim Templeton has always had an overactive imagination—and for the past seven years—life has been all peaches for him, getting all the love and affection from his caring parents. However, after the arrival of Boss Baby, an unexpected new brother dressed in a black suit complete with a tie and a briefcase, Tim will not be the center of attention anymore, as the powerful sibling takes over the whole house, robbing him of all care, little by little. But soon, Tim and the new Boss in a diaper will need to put differences aside and join forces, as a sneaky scheme involving the head of Puppy Co. threatens to tilt the balance of power towards their insidiously adorable furry antagonists, not to mention that the next Pet Convention is only in two days. Brothers, hurry up.
Summaries
[edit]A suit-wearing, briefcase-carrying baby pairs up with his seven-year old brother to stop the dastardly plot of the CEO of Puppy Co.
Learn English Through Movies
[edit]- Survival of the fittest
- It is the law of the jungle
- There is always someone trying
- to take what is yours
- How do I know?
- It almost happened to me
- Tim Templeton...
- quit monkeying around
- Hot dogs are getting cold
- Hot dogs?
- At least, this is how I remember it
- All right buddy, let is eat
- You see, I was seven years old...
- and back then
- you relied on your imagination
- When I wasn't exploring the Congo
- I was a deep-sea diver
- Tim
- Our hero
- Don't worry, Mom and Dad
- I got this
- Grab on
- Some days, I rescued my parents
- That way
- Other days, they rescued me
- - I am losing control
- - Tim, look out
- Tree
- You are breaking up
- Slow down, Tim
- - Turn, Tim
- - Turn
- - Are you hurt?
- - I am okay
- Show Mommy your teeth
- It was just the three of us
- The Templetons
- And three is the perfect number
- Interesting fact:
- did you know that the triangle
- is the strongest shape found in nature?
- I was the luckiest kid ever
- My parents even had cool jobs
- They worked for the biggest pet company
- in the world
- Puppy Co
- Yes, Mr. Francis?
- - Puppy Co needs you
- It is gone time
- They worked in a department
- called "Marketing"
- where they got to launch new products
- Even though my parents worked really hard
- they still made just enough time for me
- Three stories, five hugs
- and my special song, right?
- You got it
- Blackbird singing in the dead of night
- Take these broken wings
- and learn to fly
- All your life
- You were only waiting for this moment
- to arise
- Hey, Tim. How would you like
- to have a baby brother?
- No, thanks. I am enough
- Life was good
- Life was perfect
- But as I drifted off to sleep...
- something my parents said got me thinking.
- Where do babies come from?
- The day I got a little brother started
- like any other day
- but little did I know
- my life would never be the same
- Wake up, little halflings
- It's 7:00 a.m.
- Wake up, little halflings
- Morning, Whizzy
- What great adventure
- lies in wait for you today.
- Oh, yeah
- My parents always said that I had
- an overactive imagination
- But I clearly remember...
- the baby was delivered in a taxi
- What the...?
- Hey
- Tim, look who is here
- Meet your new baby brother
- Baby what?
- _______
- Survival of the fittest — a natural process resulting in the evolution of organisms best adapted to the environment
- monkeying around — To do things that are not useful or serious:
- to waste time
- You see — when you are explaining something to someone, to encourage them to listen and understand
- the dead of night — The middle of the night, when it is very dark
- but little did I know — I do not have any idea at all
Dialogue
[edit]- [Opening lines]
- [Young Tim rustles through leaves in an imaginary jungle scene]
- Adult Tim: [narrates] Survival of the fittest. It is the law of the jungle. There is always someone trying to take what is yours. [a comical blue gorilla sniffs a lantern and throws it, followed by a growl] How do I know? [Young Tim jumps down onto the jungle floor and screen freezes when Tim gets up] It almost happened to me.
- Ted and Janice: [singing "Blackbird"] Blackbird singing in the dead of night / [Ted imitates roar] Take these broken wings and learn to fly / All your life / You were only waiting / For this moment to arise.
- Janice: Tim, look who is here.
- Ted: Meet your new baby [in slow-motion voice] brother.
- Tim: Baby what?
- Ted: Brother.
- [Tim divers in the water, Boss Baby in underwater, Tim muffled screams in terror.]
- Tim: Mom, he’s naked! [Janice chuckles] I'm naked!
- Ted: Say "naked"!
- Tim: No!
- Tim: [about the baby] Look at him! He wears a suit!
- Janice: I know. Isn't it cute? He is like a little man!
- Tim: He carries a briefcase! Does no one else think that's... oh, I don't know... a little freaky?
- Ted: Well, you carried Lam-Lam around until you were like-
- Tim: This is not about Lam-Lam.
- [Boss Baby snickers]
- Boss Baby: I'm making great progress with the parents already. Oh, the usual procedure, sleep deprivation, hunger strikes. They're very disoriented. I've got them, eating out of the palm of my hand. They do everything for me. It's hilarious. But I think the kid might be on to me. No, I can handle him. I know how this important mission is to the company.
- Tim: Mission?
- Boss Baby: Well, trust me, ma'am. You've got the right baby for this job.
- Tim: Hands up, devil baby!
- Boss Baby: Fart! Poop! Doody! [Tim screams and exclaims while a toy gun is firing] I've gotta deal with the K. I. D.
- Tim: You can talk!
- Boss Baby: Uh, goo-goo ga-ga.
- Tim: No! You can really talk! I heard you!
- Boss Baby: Fine! I can talk. Now let's see if you can listen. Give me a double espresso and see if there's someplace around here with decent sushi, I'd KILL for a spicy tuna roll right about now. [gives Tim some money] Get yourself a little something.
- Tim: Who are you?
- Boss Baby: Let's just say... I'm the boss.
- Tim: The boss? You're a baby, you wear a diaper.
- Boss Baby: You know who else wears diapers? Astronauts, and NASCAR drivers, that's who called efficiency, Templeton. The average toddler spends, what? Forty-five hours a year on the potty? [laughs] I'm the boss. I don't have that kind of spare time.
- Tim: Well... you're not the boss of me.
- Boss Baby: I am the boss of you.
- Tim: No, you are not.
- Boss Baby: Am, too. [Tim: Are not.] Am, too. [Tim: Are not.] Am, too! [Tim: Are not!] Am, too! [Tim: Are not!] [over recording] Am, too. [Tim: Are not!] Am, too. Am, too. Am, too. Am, too.
- Tim: I was here first. Just wait until Mom and Dad find out about this!
- Boss Baby: Oh, yeah? You think they'd pick you over me? With your track record?
- Tim: You don't know anything about me.
- Boss Baby: So that's how you want to play it, huh? Let's see. Templeton, Timothy, middle name. [laughs] I'm sorry, Leslie! Mostly C's.
- Tim: How do you know all that?
- Boss Baby: Can't ride a bike without training wheels? Even bears can ride a bike without training wheels, Leslie.
- Tim: Um.
- Boss Baby: Uh, DOB says you are seven.
- Tim: Seven and a half.
- Boss Baby: [snores] Power nap! Uh, you were saying?
- Tim: I'm seven and a half.
- Boss Baby: Exactly, you're old. It's time to make way for the next generation. It's the way of the world. You would never ask your parents for an old toy.
- Tim: Lam-Lam?
- Boss Baby: Everyone wants the hot, new thing.
- Robot: Destroy.
- Tim: Lam-Lam!
- Boss Baby: I've got fresh batteries! BOOM!
- Tim: Mom and Dad don't even know you. They love me!
- Boss Baby: Oh yeah? Do the math, kid. There's only so much love to go around. It's like these beads. You used to have all your parents' love. All their time, all their attention. You had all the beads, but then I came along. Babies take up a lot of time. They need a lot of attention. They get all the love.
- Tim: We could share.
- Boss Baby: You obviously didn't go to business school. Look, Templeton, the numbers just don't add up. There's not enough love for the two of us. Not enough beads to go around. And then, all of a sudden... [gasps] there's no place for Tim. Tim doesn't fit anymore. Oh no! What about Tim? [laughs] So keep quiet, stay out of my way, or there's gonna be cutbacks. [flicks fingers]
- Tim: [scoffs] You can't be fired from your own family! Can you? [screaming] Dad?
- Ted: Hello! Timothy, right?
- Tim: Yeah.
- Ted: Well, you know your mother.
- Janice: Hi, Timmy! Thanks for coming in.
- Ted: And the new Tim.
- Theodore: Hello, Templeton.
- Tim: New Tim?
- Ted: Hm, yes, but, hey, we're letting you go.
- Janice: Right, so.
- Tim: What? Why?
- Ted: Well, let's see... Timothy Leslie Templeton.
- Ted, Janice and Theodore: Leslie! [all laughing]
- Ted: Your name is Leslie!
- Janice: It is a girl's name, but he's a boy!
- Tim: Hey, you named me?
- Ted: [clears throat] Says here you're messy, you pick your nose, you fidget, and you can't even ride a bike?
- Tim: Wait, neither can...
- Theodore: Oh, baby! Whoo!
- Ted: Isn't he incredible?
- Tim: But...
- Ted: I'm sorry, old Tim, but we've looked at this from all sides.
- Theodore: Triangle.
- Ted: Here are your things. Oh, and here's your family report card so you can see what you did wrong.
- Tim: But, Mom, Dad, I've been with you for years.
- Janice: Only seven.
- Tim: And a half.
- Theodore: What's that, Lam-Lam? [whispering] You wanna pull the lever?
- Tim: Lam-Lam! No!
- Theodore: [imitates Lam-Lam] You're fired! [Tim screaming, and the Boss Baby laughing. Tim screams, and the scene cuts back to Tim's room]
- Ted: [opens door] Tim, you're right, son?
- Tim: Well, there's something really important I've gotta tell you about the baby.
- Ted: What is it?
- Tim: He can talk!
- Theodore: Da-da!
- Ted: Oh, he said! Honey, get my tape recorder! He said my name! Bring everything in!
- Theodore: They will never believe you. Shhhhh.
- Boss Baby: Thank you all for coming here on such short notice. Now, before we begin... [Is the kid listening?]
- Triplet One: Yes, sir!
- Triplet Two: Sure is!
- Triplet Three: Affirmative!
- Boss Baby: Jimbo, run some interference.
- Tim: Hey!
- Boss Baby: We babies are having a crisis!
- Triplet One: Oh no!
- Triplet Two: That is awful!
- Triplet Three: Horrible!
- Staci: What is it?
- Boss Baby: Well, it is simpler if I just show you. Teddy, if you please.
- Story Bear: Let's put on a show!
- Triplets: Oh. [Staci gasps]
- Story Bear: Here we go!
- Boss Baby: Jimbo, hit the lights. [Jimbo hits lights] You see, babies are not getting as much love as we used to.
- Staci: Why? Have we been bad?
- Boss Baby: No, Staci. But I will tell you who is. Behold our mortal enemy. Puppies! [All: Aww!] No, no, that is exactly the problem!
- Tim: Puppies? What is the deal with puppies?
- Boss Baby: Throughout history, people have loved babies more than anything in the world. We have always been must-have item, number one on every wish list. Puppies were merely accessories. But all that changed when the puppies began coming out with new designer models. Each one more adorable than the last. Remember the Labradoodle? The Peekaboo? The Chiweenie? Try to say "Chiweenie" without smiling. [All: Chiwee...] Not possible. Don't waste your time. We all laughed at the Shar Pei. [Jimbo laughs] And now it is number one in China.
- Triplet One: Oh no!
- Triplet Two: That is terrible!
- Triplet Three: Horrible!
- Boss Baby: Yes. And it gets even worse. Francis, the CEO of Puppy Co, made this announcement. Teddy, roll the clip.
- Francis Francis: And we are on schedule to release the most adorable puppy ever! We are going to launch it at the pet convention in Las Vegas! Watch out, world! It is going to crush the competition!
- Jimbo: [laughs] Yay!
- Boss Baby: No, Jimbo. No "yay". We are the competition! This is war. Puppies are winning, and babies are losing. Thank you, Teddy. And if this new puppy is as cute as we fear, it could put the baby business out of business, baby.
- Triplet One: Uh-oh!
- Triplet Two: That is awful!
- Triplet Three: Bad news, baby!
- Staci: What are we going to do?
- Boss Baby: My job is to find out exactly what that new puppy is, so that Baby Corp can stop it. And you're going to help me.
- Triplet One: Genius!
- Triplet Two: Home run!
- Triplet Three: You still got it, boss!
- Staci: Yay!
- Boss Baby: Yay. Now, your parents all work for Puppy Co. So, have you learned anything from them?
- Triplet One: Yes, sir!
- Triplet Two: Sure did!
- Triplet Three: Mm-hm!
- Boss Baby: Fantastic. Triplets, go!
- Triplet One: A.
- Triplet Two: B.
- Triplet Three: C.
- Triplet One: D.
- Boss Baby: No, what have you learned about the new puppy?
- Jimbo: [laughs] Yay, puppy!
- Boss Baby: No, Jimbo! Puppies are evil! Staci, read back the notes.
- Staci: I can't read. What's it saying? [Jimbo rattles, then Boss Baby stops the rattle]
- Boss Baby: This is my team!? A muscle-head, a bunch of yes men, and a doodler?
- Triplet One: Exactly!
- Triplet Two: Affirmative!
- Triplet Three: Good call!
- Triplet One: Oh yeah!
- Triplet Two: Nice one, BB!
- Tim: Gotcha!
- Boss Baby: (to Jimbo) PUT THAT COOKIE DOWN! COOKIES ARE FOR CLOSERS!
- Story Bear: Let's have another show!
- Boss Baby: No, Teddy! No! [Staci cries]
- Story Bear: How about a hug?
- Boss Baby: No more shows!
- Triplet: Boss!
- Story Bear: There is plenty of love to go around!
- Boss Baby: Teddy, go to sleep!
- Story Bear: [in low-battery voice] Nighty-night... [faints]
- Triplet: Boss, Boss!
- Boss Baby: WHAT?!
- Triplets: PARENTS!
- Ted: Aww! It is like they're having their own little meeting!
- Janice: Is not that adorable?
- Man: Who wants dessert?
- Boss Baby: [takes his foot out of his mouth] God, this is so humiliating! [it repeats on the tape]
- Tim: [determined] Wait until Mom and Dad hear this. [gasps, finds Boss Baby and his infants]
- Boss Baby: Hey, Templeton. What have you got there?
- Tim: [hides the tape] Uh, nothing.
- Boss Baby: Hand over the tape.
- Tim: Never! [rushes outside and finds Janice and Ted inside] Mom! Dad! Over here!
- Janice: Hi, Timmy!
- Ted: Hi! Anyway... [Tim gets surrounded by Boss Baby and his infants. They are in vehicles. Staci in a kid's flower bike.]
- Girl: (on recording) Flower power! [Jimbo rolls his ball popper. The triplets in a firetruck. Boss Baby in a police car.]
- Boss Baby: [through a bullhorn] You can not get away from Johnny Law, simpleton.
- [the chase starts]
- Tim: Ha! [runs]
- Girl: Fasten your seat belt! Let's go!
- [Staci gets stuck in a sandbox, and pouts]
- Jimbo: Run, run, run, run, run... [crashes through a fence. The triplets ride in the firetruck and snatch the tape]
- Tim: Hey! [finds the hose rolling out] Hmm.
- Triplet: [gasps] Uh-oh! [Tim ties the hose to a pole with tap and yanks it really hard, which sends the triplets and the tape flying]
- Triplets: [flying through the air] WHOA!
- Jimbo: [runs out of the fence] Run, run, run, run, run, run, run!
- [Jimbo catches them, and the firetruck hits the ground explodes, sending the tape flying]
- Tim: Whoa!
- Boss Baby: Yes! [grabs the tape and flies in the air then comes back to the ground] Oh, yeah! [finds Tim in the police car, then Tim splutters] Let go, you little...
- [scene cuts to Ted and Janice looking outside a window]
- Janice: Oh, look, the kids are finally getting along.
- Ted: That is nice! [Janice and Ted clink glasses together]
- [Boss Baby swings Tim around, then falls onto the grass, the babies come in, Boss Baby makes a throat cutting gesture, and the babies charge]
- Tim: Sayonara! [rides a rope into his treehouse, and grabs suction cup darts and a Nerf gun] You want to play? Let's play! [uses a paper clip and swings down on a rope and shoots suction cup darts at Jimbo]
- Jimbo: Nooooo! Save boss, save boss! [gets suction cup darts on him. The tape drops. Tim grabs the tape]
- Boss Baby: Get him!
- Triplets: I got him, I got him, I got him! [Tim jumps on a trampoline into the window of the house, and Staci and the triplets bounce on the trampoline, unable to reach the window. Staci flies into the air and gets stuck in a tree]
- Tim: You are toast, baby man!
- Boss Baby: Upsies! I need upsieeees! [Jimbo twirls him, and Boss Baby flies into a window, breaking it.]
- Ted: [comes out with a plate of cheese-sticks] Who wants... [drops the plate] cheese-sticks! [They look at the mess. Jimbo stands still. The triplets play with the broken glass from the window that Jimbo threw Boss Baby into it. Staci is stuck in the tree. She looks at them, with a confused expression on her face, and cries.]
- Woman: Oh! Oh! Oh!
- Tim: Mom, Dad! I've got proof! [Boss Baby runs in his walker and gets vampire teeth and bites Tim on the leg] Ah! [Boss Baby tumbles, and Tim slides down the stairs] Oh, someone cannot go down the stairs? Ha!
- Boss Baby: Nothing can stop me! [rolls down the stairs, then Tim opens the door, and he rolls outside, and Tim closes the door]
- Tim: Mom, Dad! Where are you guys? Hello! Where did everyone go? [runs into the office room] Mom, Dad! The baby can talk!
- Boss Baby: Oh, can he now? [turns to Tim in a chair]
- Tim: Wait, how did you...?
- Boss Baby: Hand over the tape, Timmy. Or Lam-Lam gets it, see? [grabs a stapler]
- Tim: No!
- Boss Baby: What is that, Lam-Lam? Oh, you want a nose ring? Well, it is really not my scene, but who am I TO JUDGE?! [staples Lam-Lam's nose, then Tim whimpers] And an eyebrow ring. Seems like a little bit too much, Lam-Lam! [staples Lam-Lam's eyebrow]
- Tim: Ah!
- Boss Baby: How's that gonna look in a job interview?
- Tim: Stop it!
- Boss Baby: The tape, Timmy, or I'm gonna rip-rip-rip-rip-rip-rip-rip...
- Tim: NOOOOO! [grabs Lam-Lam and they tug at her] Let go!
- Boss Baby: You let go!
- Tim: No, you let go!
- Boss Baby: Give me the tape!
- Tim: No, give me Lam-Lam! [pauses; gasps, seeing Lam-Lam ripped, then glares at Boss Baby] (You ripped it?! THAT'S NOT FAIR!)
- Boss Baby: Whoops! Too far! [Tim grunts, grabs him] Templeton, Templeton, let’s be reasonable! We can be reasonable, right? What are you doing?!
- Tim: [throws Boss Baby in a baby jumper and opens the curtains and window] You have been asking for this since you got here! [puts the jumper up on the window]
- Boss Baby: We can talk about this over a juice box!
- Tim: [pulls it back to use as a slingshot] Time for juice boxes is over!
- Boss Baby: No, no, Templeton! You wouldn't!
- Tim: Say bye-bye, baby! You're fired!
- Ted: [enters the room with Janice] Tim, what are you doing?!
- Tim: [looks at his father] Nothing. [Boss Baby looks at Ted, and cries. Tim let us go of the jumper, accidentally shoots the tape out the window, then it lands onto the road and gets run over in tape is brokeness by a passing car, horrified, gasps] My proof! [Boss Baby grins triumphantly]
- Janice: Tim! [takes Boss Baby] Explain yourself!
- Ted: Yes, explain yourself!
- Tim: It was not me! It was the baby's fault!
- Ted: The baby's fault?
- Tim: It's true, he can talk! They all can talk! They are having a meeting! There is something about puppies! It is one big baby con-spy-racy!
- Janice: [shocked] Timothy Leslie Templeton?!?!?! [Boss Baby snickers]
- Ted: [Sulky] We are very disappointed in you.
- Janice: [corrects Ted] No, we're mad at you!
- Ted: Exactly, we're mad at you!
- Tim: [heartbroken] Mad?
- Ted: You need a time-out!
- Janice: [corrects Ted again] No, you're grounded! (And I mean it!)
- Ted: Yes, grounded! For two?
- Janice: No, three! ([Francis Francis: No more three!] Shut up, Francis Francis!)
- Ted: Three days?
- Janice: No, weeks!
- Ted: Weeks! Three weeks!
- Janice: For three... EVERS!!!
- Ted: (Janice, shut up, or Give it Baby and I'm taking away from her!)
- Tim: [heartbroken] Grounded?
- Janice: (You know what, Ted? It's all Big Bossy Baby's fault.) You are going to stay in this house with your baby brother... [Boss Baby gasps and looks at her] until you learn to get along.
- Ted: (Silence! You're not getting baby back again!)
- Boss Baby: [slight pauses; disappointed] Oh, great.
- Janice: [Ted takes the baby] (Hey! Give it back! [grabs Janice’s hand wrist and walk outside] Get off me! You resists! Let me go!) [Tim looks down in disappointment. The scene fades to a jail/prison cell]
- Adult Tim: [narrates] It was my first time behind bars. The big house. The lock-up. Grounded for life. The minutes turned into hours, the hours into days. Every man has his breaking point. This was mine.
- Tim: [about "Blackbird"] Stop it, that is my song, not yours! My parents wrote it just for me!
- Boss Baby: Really? Your parents are Lennon and McCartney?
- Tim: No, Ted and Janice. You don't even know their names. You are just trying to steal them from me! You stole everything! You are the one who should be in jail!?
- Boss Baby: [sighs] Look, it is time we put our differences aside. Oh, uh, have you been...
- Tim: No!
- Boss Baby: Oh, where is HR when you need them? [?] Take it.
- Tim: I don't want your filthy money.
- Tim: [regarding Baby Corp] So this whole place is run by babies?
- Boss Baby: Yep.
- Tim: My dad says, "Those who can, do. And those who cannot, supervise."
- Boss Baby: Your father is a hippie.
- Big Boss Baby: WHAT? So help me, I will nail his diaper to the wall! Have we ever heard from that little Boss Baby that we sent down to the Templetons?
- [???]: I don't know.
- Big Boss Baby: YOU'RE FIRED!
- Boss Baby: Oh no!
- Big Boss Baby: YOU'RE ALL FIRED! THE PET CONVENTION IS IN TWO DAYS! If he doesn't come up with answers, HE'S FIRED, RETIRED, GONE!!!
- Boss Baby: Okay, tour's over!
- Tim: AAAAAGGGHHH!!! What was Big Bossy Baby Lady screaming about?
- Boss Baby: [stressed] She's demanding actual results. The pet convention is in two days... AND I'VE GOT NOTHING! [phone rings] That's her! Don't answer it! [he chucks the phone into a dirty diaper bin, and Tim dodges it. Boss Baby nearly falls asleep but wakes up again] AH! STRESS NAP! [Squeezing Senor Squeaky as he paces back and forth across the room] If I don't find out what that new puppy is and fast, not only will I not get that promotion, I COULD GET FIRED!
- Tim: Hey, relax. I'm sure there's other cool jobs for babies, right? [snaps his fingers; condescendingly] Meanwhile, two days goes by like that. [holds up Boss Baby is briefcase] You better start packing.
- Boss Baby: [enraged] WHAT!?!?!? [belligerently throws Senor Squeaky into Tim's groin]
- Tim: [in agony] OOOHHHHH!
- Boss Baby: [grabs Tim by his shirt] YOU DON'T GET IT, TEMPLETON!!! If I'm fired, they'll take away my formula. I will turn into a normal baby and live here forever with you!
- Tim: No!
- Boss Baby: Yes! And I promise you this: Every morning you wake up, I will be there. Shh. Every night at dinner, I will be there. Every birthday party, I will be there. Every Christmas, I'll BE THERE!!! Year after year after year. We will grow old together. You and I... will be brothers. Always.
- Tim: No, no, this is terrible!
- Boss Baby: I know!
- Tim: This can't be happening!
- Boss Baby: But it is!
- Tim: YOU CAN'T STAY HERE!
- Boss Baby: I CAN'T!
- Tim: DON'T PANIC!
- Boss Baby: BUT IT FEELS RIGHT!
- Tim: I KNOW! But we have to fix this! We have to make sure you don't get fired!
- Boss Baby: We?
- Tim: We. I will help you, but just to get rid of you. Deal?
- Boss Baby: Deal. Here's to never seeing you again.
- Tim: Back at ya, baby. Um.
- Boss Baby: [sighs] Now let's get to work.
- Janice: Hey, what's all the racket?
- Tim: Aw! Isn't he adorable?
- Janice: Oh, I've got one for you, too! Ahoy, matey!
- Ted: Ooh.
- Tim: What?
- Boss Baby: [snickers] Bummer!
- Boss Baby: Tim, I may look like a baby, but I was born all grown-up.
- Tim: I cannot even imagine not being a kid. You missed out on your whole childhood? You never had someone to love you?
- Boss Baby: [yawning] Well, you can't miss what you never had.
- Ted: They have a puppy pool and everything!
- Janice: [sarcastically] Oh, isn't that sanitary?
- Boss Baby: [in puppy costume] I've never been so humiliated in all my LIFE! [dog sniffs costume's bottom part] Ugh!
- [Tim laughs]
- Boss Baby: Well, that didn't end well. [Tim and Boss Baby look at "Top Secret: New Puppy" file, opened up, and he sees the quote written "GOTCHA!!!"]
- Tim and Boss Baby: WHAT?! [Puppy Co Pete chuckles ominously and pulls the lever, then Tim and Boss Baby screams in fall and ties to chair]
- Tim: Huh?
- Boss Baby: What the...?
- [Eugene groans]
- Francis Francis: [laughs] Thanks for dropping in, kids.
- Tim: Francis Francis?
- Francis Francis: I see you've met my big brother, Eugene. A man of few words. [Eugene takes off his Puppy Co. Pete head and makes a growling gibberish noise] None, in fact.
- Tim: Do you put your head back on, please?
- [Eugene yells]
- Boss Baby: What is all this?
- Francis Francis: [takes out a Baby Corp pacifier] Surprise!!
- Boss Baby: A Baby Corp binky? Where did you get that?!?!
- Francis Francis: Oh, you don't recognize me? Perhaps from my youth!
- [Francis Francis pulls a rope, separating two curtains behind him to reveal a portrait of Boss Baby's idol, Super Colossal Big Fat Boss Baby]:
- Boss Baby: Super Colossal Big Fat Boss Baby?
- Tim: Whoa. He is him? And him is you? Except older and wrinklier. [reacting to Francis Francis sucks on the pacifier] That's not right.
- Boss Baby: No, you were my hero! How did you end up... here?
- Francis Francis: [irritated] You know what I do to little kids who ask lots of questions about me? Eugene!
- [Eugene takes a pop-up book out of his sleeve. The boys cower, but sigh in relief after it is revealed]
- Francis Francis: [happily] I read them my story. [as Eugene sets down cookies] And... I BAKED COOKIES! Eugene, my chair.
- [Eugene lowers his body to form a chair, and Francis sits on his lap]
- Francis Francis: [opens the book] Now, it all started at Baby Corp, a long, long time ago, I was a hotshot executive headed straight to the top. Everyone loved me. They gave me a promotion, the corner office, my very own...
- Boss Baby: Personal potty?
- Francis Francis: Shing! I had it all. [sadly] But then, one day, I made a terrible discovery. I was getting... old. The formula wasn't working anymore. It turns out I was lactose intolerant.
- Boss Baby: No!
- Francis Francis: Yes! I got called in to see the board of directors.
- Tim: Who are the boring directors?
- Francis Francis: The biggest baby bosses of them all. I thought they loved me. But they replaced me with someone new, someone younger.
- Tim: That's horrible.
- Francis Francis: All of a sudden, she got all the love, all the attention. You know how that feels, don't you, Tim? It hurts, does'nt it? [hands a cookie to Tim]
- Tim: Yeah, it does. [eats the cookies] And then what happened?
- Francis Francis: [weeping] Well... [angrily snaps with a red hue glowing on his face] THEY FIRED ME!!! AND TOOK AWAY MY SPECIAL FORMULA! THEN THEY SENT ME DOWN TO LIVE WITH A… [stammering] family!
- Boss Baby: Oh, Francis Francis, no!
- Francis Francis: BABY CORP BETRAYED ME!!! AND I'M FINALLY GOING TO GET REVENGE! WITH! [Boss Baby and Tim scream, then Francis Francis flips the page to reveal a small white puppy with black ears and big green eyes; gleefully] The Forever Puppy.
- Tim: Huh?
- Boss Baby: That's, it?
- Francis Francis: [as he is flipping pages] No, no. Imagine a puppy that never grows up. A puppy that stays a puppy forever. Once I launch my Forever Puppies to every corner of the world, they'll be so adorable...
- Imaginary Voices: How cute!
- Francis Francis: ...no one will ever want a baby ever, ever again! The end... of Baby Corp!
- [Francis Francis does a maniacal laugh as he attempts to close the book, but the pages fold out so much that it does not close, so he angrily tosses it into a nearby fireplace]
- Boss Baby: Oh, please. A puppy that never grows up. That's impossible! [after brief silence] Isn't it?
- Francis Francis: Oh, it was, until you brought me the key ingredient.
- [Eugene snatches the formula from Tim's backpack]
- Boss Baby: My secret formula.
- Francis Francis: [snatches the formula from Eugene] IT'S MINE! IT'S MINE! It's all mine.
- Boss Baby: No!
- Francis Francis: [as he sends the formula up a capsule pipeline] You brought me the very thing I needed to destroyed Baby Corp.
- Boss Baby: No!
- Francis Francis: Yes! [laughs] You walked right into my trap!
- Boss Baby: YOU'LL NEVER GET AWAY WITH THIS!
- Tim: Yeah, not if we-
- Francis Francis: What? Tell? Who are you gonna tell, Tim? Your parents?
- [Francis Francis plays live surveillance footage of Ted of Janice looking for them]
- Janice: Where are the boys?
- Ted: I told them to stay in the Puppy Zone.
- Francis Francis: I'm taking them both with me to Las Vegas. So, stay out of my way. [crushes a cookie] I'd hate for them to get... terminated.
- Tim: Ha! They'd never leave us alone!
- Francis Francis: Oh, really? [snaps fingers, prompting Eugene to change from his business attire to that of a Mary Poppins-like nanny] Wait until they meet Puppy Co.'s certified in-house childcare expert.
- Both: Ah!
- Eugene: Hoo-hoo-hoo!
- Both: Oh no.
- Ted: Don't be nervous, buddy.
- Janice: It's only overnight.
- Ted: We'll be back before you know it.
- Janice: Besides, you boys are in great hands. [Eugene laughing]
- Francis Francis: That's right, Eugenia is practically perfect in every way!
- Tim: No! Please don't go with him. Francis Francis is trying to-
- Francis Francis: Oh! Believe me, Eugenia won't take her eyes off your children. Not for one second.
- Ted: That's very reassuring.
- Francis Francis: Now you see them... [crushes cookies] and now, you don't. [Ted and Janice are ready to the airport with Francis Francis] Too-da-loo!
- Eugene: Hoo-hoo-hoo!
- Francis: To the airport! [Eugene takes Tim and Boss Baby to the baby's room]
- Boss Baby: It's over, I'm through. What do we do, Templeton, what do we do?
- Tim: We have to get to the airport and stop Francis before the plane takes off.
- Boss Baby: Yes, but how do we get past Scary Poppins down there?
- Tim: Okay, there must be something we can do... [Boss Baby cries] Hey, it's not that bad? [Boss Baby laughs] Are you okay? What's the matter with you?
- Boss Baby: Ah! DON'T LOOK AT ME! Oh no, without that formula, I turn into a normal baby! You know, goo-goo, ga-ga, the whole bit!
- Tim: Oh no.
- Boss Baby: Ah!
- Tim: Bleugh! Gross!
- Boss Baby: Ew, ew!
- Tim: Ow!
- Boss Baby: [sighs] I'm a ticking baby time bomb! I'm gonna turn it into a PUKING, POOPING, HELPLESS BABY!
- Tim: Wait a second. That gives me an idea!
- Boss Baby: What? What is it?
- Tim: I've been through a lot of babysitters, and they all fear one thing.
- [?]
- TV Chef: Now ladies, the secret to deep fried butter, is a healthy dab of margarine.
- Eugene: Mm. Yum-yum.
- Tim: Hey, Mr. Lady Man! [Eugene: Huh!?] The baby, I think he's sick! [Eugene exclaims] You gotta do something. [?] Oh, the horror! [?]
- Boss Baby: Templeton!
- TV Chef: Delicious! [?]
- Tim: Gross, it got in your mouth! Ew, it got in my mouth, too! I think I am going to be sick!
- Boss Baby: ¡Vamos al baño! (Let's go to the bathroom!) [?] Swirly! [?]
- Tim: There's only an hour before the plane takes off.
- Boss Baby: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Let's take the bike!
- Tim: Uh, the bike? Um... I don't know. Ah!
- Boss Baby: Let's move!
- Tim: Okay, but wait right here.
- Boss Baby: What? Where are you going? Templeton!
- Tim: Always wear a helmet.
- Eugene: AAAARRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!
- Boss Baby: Too-da-loo, toilet head!
- Tim: Ha! You'll never catch us!
- [?]
- Boss Baby: Staci! [over speaker] Staci, come in!
- [Staci cries]
- Woman: Oh, Staci.
- Staci: Is that you, boss?
- Boss Baby: Code red! I am being chased by a killer babysitter! Gather the team!
- Staci: On it, boss.
- Triplet One: Hello!
- Triplet Two: Hello!
- Triplet Three: Hello!
- Staci: Code red!
- Triplets: Got it! [?] We got a code red! Repeat. We got a code red!
- Boss Baby: What are you doing, Templeton? Go, go!
- Tim: But that's jaywalking!
- Boss Baby: Here, I'll pay your ticket. Go! [?]
- Tim: I think we lost him!
- Boss Baby: Oh no, we didn't! [?]
- Girl: [on recording] Flower power! [?]
- Jimbo: Pow, pow, pow, pow, pow, pow!
- Boss Baby: Ha-ha, that's my boy!
- Jimbo: [?] Poppy! [?] Run, run, run, run, run, run, run. [?]
- Triplets: Uh-oh.
- Jimbo: Run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run. [Eugene makes an evil chuckle, Tim and Boss Baby are riding a bicycle with training wheels, going after their parents, who are on their way to the airport, while being chased by Eugene]
- Boss Baby: Tim, you've gotta go faster!
- Tim: I can't! I can't do it!
- Boss Baby: You can! Ha![leaps up onto Tim's shoulder] You've got it in you, Templeton! Now, eyes ahead! I said eyes ahead, son! Buttocks up! Now pedal like you mean it! Either you run the day, or the day runs you. [Tim pedals faster, Eugene almost catches them, but Boss Baby dodges his grasp, and they get further away] Good! [the bicycle's training wheels break off] Uh-oh!
- Tim: Whoa! My training wheels! I can't ride without training wheels!
- Boss Baby: Whether you think you can or you think you can't, you're right!
- Tim: Ah! What are you talking about?
- Boss Baby: The path to success is not a straight line, Templeton, but rather a wild ride... like a ship at sea! And you're a sea captain, taming a turbulent ocean! [The scene transforms from a suburb to an ocean, with Tim and Boss Baby riding a boat]
- Tim: I'm a sea captain, taming the ocean! [they evade the incoming "whale"]
- Both: Ah!
- Boss Baby: Good!
- Tim: Tree! I'm gonna hit it!
- Boss Baby: Aim for failure, and you'll always succeed.
- Tim: What?
- Boss Baby: AIM AWAY FROM FAILURE! [Tim steers away from the tree, the scene transforms back into a suburb backdrop]
- Tim: I'm doing it, I'm doing it! [They travel through a forest, with Eugene close behind who is smashing past trees]
- Boss Baby: Once success is a habit, then it's all down...
- Tim and Boss Baby: HILL! [They ride down a hill, at which time, they see the car which their parents are in with Francis Francis]
- Tim: Look, there they are! Mom, Dad! [as the car passes the train crossing, the train passes by] Train!
- Boss Baby: Choo-choo! [They continue to approach the train crossing, with Eugene close behind] Templeton, stop! [Tim notices a mold of sand at a construction site next to the tracks, Tim steers towards it] What are you doing? [Tim pedals faster, the scene transforms into a ramp, with them riding a motorcycle, at the end of a ramp there is a ring of fire]
- Tim: We're gonna make it!
- Boss Baby: But I don't have a quote for this! [They jump, Boss Baby yells out "Aaahhh!", and they make it, as the scene transform back into the "real" world, Eugene crashes into the mold of sand, ending the pursuit] (to Tim) You did it!
- Tim: No, we did it!
- Boss Baby: And all without your training wheels.
- [Tim and Boss Baby are riding a bike at the airport]
- Tim: Coming through!
- Boss Baby: Baby on board!
- Tim: Hang on to your diaper! Duck and cover!
- Both: Whoa,
- Guard: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold it, buddy! I'm gonna need a strip search on two.
- Tim: Um, there they are! Mom, Dad!
- Boss Baby: Hey, not so fast! Uh! Oh no. [laughs and coos] Ah! Templeton!
- Man: Hey! [Tim: Sorry!] [Boss Baby laughs and eats a coin]
- Tim: Hey, where'd you go? Oh no. Not again! Not now.
- Boss Baby: Ugh! What the...? Ah! Ah, ah, ah, ah! No, no, no, no!
- Tim: [takes Boss Baby] Come on!
- Boss Baby: Ugh. I think I ate $1.75.
- Tim: Excuse me, coming through! Mom, Dad!
- Francis Francis: Ah! Hurry now! Move! [Tim: Stop!] We don't wanna miss our flight! [Tim: No!] I warned you!
- Tim: Wait! No! [Boss Baby: No, no!] Mom, Dad! Stop!
- Boss Baby: No!
- Tim: No, no, no! [watching Francis Francis escape on the Puppy Co. plane with his parents] They're gone.
- Boss Baby: I failed.
- Tim: I would've gotten to my parents if I didn't have to go back for you!
- Boss Baby: What? We would've been here in plenty of time if you knew how to ride a bike like a normal kid! We're never going to stop the launch on time.
- Tim: Who cares? My parents are in danger!
- Boss Baby: I care! Baby Corp is gonna go out of business!
- Tim: UGHHHH!! That's all you ever talk about! You don't even know what it's like to be part of a family!
- Boss Baby: And you don't know what it's like to have a job!
- Tim: You don't know anything about hugs, or bedtime stories, or special songs!
- Boss Baby: Oh, please. Stop acting like a baby.
- Tim: You're a baby!
- Boss Baby: [gasps] You take that back.
- Tim: My life was perfect until you showed up!
- Boss Baby: Oh, believe me, kid, the feeling is mutual. I wish I'd never met you!
- Tim: I WISH YOU'D NEVER BEEN BORN!
- [Boss Baby is shocked by Tim's harsh words. He straightens his tie, and leaves.]
- Tim: Where are you going? FINE!!
- Tim: [singing] Blackbird singing in the dead of night, take these broken wings and learn to fly, all your life, you were only waiting, for this moment to arise.
- Airport Announcer: [over PA system] Would Timothy Templeton, please pick up the white courtesy phone? Timothy Leslie Templeton, please pick up the white courtesy phone. [snickers] Leslie.
- Boss Baby: I cannot do this without you, Tim. I need you.
- Tim: I guess we do make a pretty good team.
- Boss Baby: No, literally, I cannot reach the door knobs.
- Captain Ross: [making an announcement] Hello! This is Captain Ross! Ladies and gentlemen, and those in coach, please fasten your seat belts. We are about to take off.
- Boss Baby: We have gotta get to the convention center!
- Tim: Should we get a taxi?
- Boss Baby: Darn! I spent all my per diem! That's more our speed! Right.
- Tim: Excuse me, ladies! Can we get a ride home? Jimmy has been sick and he needs his expensive medicine.
- All: Aww!
- Girl: Where do you live, sweetie?
- Tim: [sniffles] The convention center.
- Boss Baby: Chicks dig babies.
- Tim: Bleugh! The people of Long Island do not know how to make an iced tea.
- Francis Francis: Hey! What are you doing here?
- Tim: Mom! Dad!
- Francis Francis: What are they doing here?
- Ted: What are Tim and the baby doing here?
- Francis Francis: What are any of us doing here, really?
- Ted: What is going on in here? [Janice: Hey!]
- Tim: He's got my parents!
- Francis Francis: We're really here to get them, get them up, get the Forever Puppy!
- [TBA]
- Boss Baby: We have got to get backstage!
- Tim: In there!
- Tim: Mom, Dad! I am coming!
- Boss Baby: Atta boy! Go, Tim! Go, go, go!
- Francis Francis: Arrrrrggghh!
- Both: Ah!
- [Francis Francis activates the rocket holding the Forever Puppies]
- Automated Female Voice: Launch initiated.
- Francis Francis: [angrily] I AM LAUNCHING MY FOREVER PUPPIES, AND THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT!
- [Francis Francis throws away the key]
- Tim: No!
- Francis Francis: Baby Corp stole all the love from me, and now I am going to take it back from them. [to Tim] You should understand what I am talking about! You got replaced just like me!
- Tim: No! I am nothing like you!
- Francis Francis: Bratty kid!
- Boss Baby: Let our parents go! His parents. The parents.
- Tim: Yeah!
- Francis Francis: [snaps] YOU COULD HAVE HAD YOUR PARENTS' LOVE ALL TO YOURSELF AGAIN! BUT NO! YOU BLEW IT! YOU LET THAT BABY BOSS YOU AROUND!
- Boss Baby: He doesn't work for me.
- Tim: We're partners. Ha!
- [Tim attempts to tickle Francis Francis, but Francis Francis is unaffected]
- Francis Francis: Ha! I am not ticklish.
- [Francis Francis notices Boss Baby is gone]
- Francis Francis: Hey! Where is the baby?
- Boss Baby: Everyone has a tickle spot!
- Francis Francis: [as Boss Baby tickles him in the ear] My ears! Stop it! [Tim and Boss Baby get past Francis Francis; Francis Francis angrily throws his cane at the boys] LITTLE BRATS! [The cane hits Tim and Boss Baby and they are dangling on a platform over a pool of formula] Nothing is going to get in the way of my vengeance. NOT YOU, NOT ANYBODY!!! BABY CORP IS THROUGH! I WIN! HA!
- Boss Baby: WRONG! You're not supposed to end with "Ha!"
- [Boss Baby's pointer becomes a pirate sword in Tim's imagination, and the setting turns into a flying pirate ship at night; Tim, Boss Baby, and Francis Francis are all wearing pirate clothes and Tim and Boss Baby are dangling on a plank]
- Tim: That's right!
- Francis Francis: What?
- Boss Baby You're supposed to end with...
- Tim and Boss Baby: AAARRGGH!
- Boss Baby: En garde!
- Francis Francis: (grunting) Hey, oh! Argh! D'oh!
- [Tim and Boss Baby jump back onto the ship and engage in swashbuckling action with Francis Francis.]
- Tim: You are fired!
- Boss Baby: And here's your severance package!
- [Boss Baby grabs Francis Francis by the tie and tosses him off of the ship.]
- Tim, Boss Baby and Francis Francis: Wait. No, no, no! Argh-ha!
- [Platform into a void.]
- Francis Francis: (yelling) WHOAAAAAAAAAAAhhhhh!!!!!
- [This is followed by a transition back to reality; Francis Francis actually fell into the pool of formula.]
- Francis: Ha, ha-ha!
- Tim: Take that, you scurvy scally-wag!
- Both: Argh!
- Automated Female Voice: One minute and counting.
- Janice: HELP!
- Ted: ANYBODY!
- Boss Baby: Tim, what are you doing? NOOOOOO! [laughs]
- Tim: Mom, Dad, I'm coming!
- Janice: Tim?
- Ted: Is that you?
- Tim: Don't worry, Mom and Dad, I got this!
- Ted: Are you okay?
- Janice: Is the baby all right?
- Boss Baby: Yes, the baby's fine!
- Janice: Who was that?
- Tim: Uh, uh, that was me. [clears throat] The baby's fine. It won't budge!
- Janice: What's happening?
- Tim: Wait a second. Hey. I know a way to move my parents.
- Boss Baby: How?
- Tim: We can use the puppies!
- Boss Baby: Upsies! I need upsies!
- Tim: (to Tim) But what if you "go baby" again?
- Boss Baby: It will be fine! [goes back into normal baby mode] Fine, fine... [slaps] FINE!! It will be fine.
- Tim: Hang on to your diaper! Woo-hoo!
- Janice: We are moving!
- Ted: Why are we moving?
- Tim: All right, Mom and Dad, hang on!
- Automated Female Voice: T-minus thirty seconds.
- Tim: Oh no, wait! Hold on!
- Boss Baby: Go, Tim! Get your parents... out of here.
- Tim: You have gotta jump! Come on, it is a piece of cake! No, no patty cake, get down! Don't cry, I am sorry, I am sorry, please don't cry.
- Automated Female Voice: Twenty seconds. Fifteen seconds.
- Tim: [singing] Blackbird singing in the dead of night. Take these broken wings and learn to fly. All your life. You were only waiting, for this moment to arise.
- Automated Female Voice: Three... [Tim: Gotcha!] two... one... blast off!
- Tim: Yeah! Hey, are you still in there? Aha!
- Boss Baby: Ah! What happened? Did we win?
- Tim: We won!
- Boss Baby: We won?
- Tim: We won, we won, we won!
- Boss Baby: We won! Yes! [snores] Victory nap! Whoo!
- [Boss Baby tickles Tim, then Tim laughs]
- Baby Francis: [reveals in the pool of formula, turns back into baby and does a snarl, then Tim gasps] You ruined everything!
- Tim: Whoa!
- Boss Baby: Ew!
- Baby Francis: It's not fair! It's not fair! It's not fair!
- Tim: That's not right.
- Baby Francis: Ugh! Now you're really going to pay!
- Boss Baby: Oh yeah? It's time you pick on someone your own size?
- Baby Francis: What? Eugene! You put me down! You hear me? I am the boss of you!
- Eugene: [after Francis turns back into baby, and is asleep, clearing his voice and speaking for the first time.] This time, we will raise him right [making a humming tune]
- Boss Baby: Well, I am sure that is gonna turn out fine.
- Janice: Tim, what is happening?
- Tim: Mom, Dad, hold on! Yes!
- Janice: Tim?
- Ted: Tim!
- Janice: Tim! Oh, are you okay?
- Tim: I am fine, we are fine.
- Ted: You saved us.
- Janice: You are our hero.
- Ted: And a great big brother.
- Janice: Oh, we love you both so much.
- Tim: Both of us?
- Janice: With all our heart.
- Ted: Let's go home.
- Tim: So, you did it.
- Boss Baby: No, we did it.
- Tim: By the way, congratulations on your promotion, the corner office, the private potty, all that stuff.
- Boss Baby: But, hey, how about you? You have your parents all to yourself.
- Tim: So... so what am I gonna tell Mom and Dad after you leave?
- Boss Baby: Oh, don't worry. Baby Corp has a procedure for situations like this. It will be like... I was never born. I almost forgot! Hoo-hoo!
- Tim: No way! Lam-Lam! You fixed her!
- Boss Baby: Yep. She is as good as new. She is a tough one.
- Tim: Well, I guess we both got what we wanted.
- Boss Baby: It is a win-win.
- Hazmat Baby: Forget about the baby, forget about the baby.
- Tim: [narrates] Dear Boss Baby, I don't usually write very much but now I know that memos are for very important things. Even though I never went to business school, I did learn to share in kindergarten. And if there is not enough love for the two of us, then I want to give you all of mine.
- [last lines]
- Tim's Daughter: Is that a true story, Daddy?
- Adult Tim: Well, sweetie, that is how I remember it. But you know what I found out?
- Tim's Daughter: What?
- Adult Tim: There is plenty of love for everyone.
- Tim's Daughter: Even me?
- Adult Tim: Especially you. Just ask your Uncle Ted.
- Uncle Ted: Hey, kid. I hear you are gonna have a baby sister.
- Tim's Daughter: I wanted a horse.
- Uncle Ted: Here you go, kid. [throws her money] Go get yourself a horse. [turns to Tim] You know, I am proud of you, Leslie.
- Adult Tim: Back at ya, Lindsey.
- Tim's Daughter: [stares at her new baby sister who wears a suit and looks like Boss Baby] Hi there, baby sister. [the baby yawns, she gasps and the baby winks]
- [In the end-credits scene]
- [Last lines]
- Wizzie: [After the end credits, the alarm clock goes off] Wake up, little halflings! It is time to leave. Go and live your peasant lives.[flailing his arms up and down] BE GONE WITH YOU!!!
- [fade to black]
Tim Gets Grounded (from Dialogue)
[edit]Tim: [running in the house with a record tape, with Boss Boby in hot pursuit in his walker] Mom, Dad! I've got proof!
[Boss Baby gets vampire teeth and bites Tim on the leg, causing him to fall. Boss Baby tumbles, and Tim slides down the stairs.]
Tim: Oh, someone can't go down the stairs? Ha!
Boss Baby: Nothing can stop me! [He rolls down the stairs, then Tim opens the door and he rolls outside]
Tim: [closes the door] Mom! Dad! [runs off to search] Where are you guys? Hello? Where did everyone go? [runs in the office room] Mom, Dad, the baby can talk!
Boss Baby: [turns to Tim in a chair with his stuffed toy, Lamb - Lamb] Oh, can he now?
Tim: Wait! How did you?
Boss Baby: Hand over the tape, Timmy, or Lam - Lam gets it, see? [holds up a stapler]
Tim: No!
Boss Baby: What's that, Lam - Lam? Oh, you want a nose ring? Well, it is really not my scene, but... who am I to judge? [staples Lam - Lam's nose, Tim whimpers]
And an eyebrow ring? Seems like a little bit too much, Lam - Lam! [staples Lam - Lam's eyebrow, Tim shouts] How is that going to look in a job interview?
Tim: Stop it!
Boss Baby: The tape, Timmy. Or l am going to rip rip rip rip rip rip rip... [prepares to rip Lam - Lam]
Tim: [yelling] NOOOO! [grabs Lam - Lam, and the two fight over it] Let go!
Boss Baby: You let go!
Tim: You let go!
Boss Baby: Give me the tape!
Tim: Give me Lam - Lam! [gasps as he sees that Lam - Lam is now ripped and glares at Boss Baby]
Boss Baby: Whoops. Too far. [Tim grabs Boss Baby to the living room] Templeton! Templeton, Templeton, let's be reasonable! What are you doing?!
Tim: [puts Boss Baby in a baby jumper and opens the curtains and the window] You have been asking this since you got here! [puts the jumper up on the window]
Boss Baby: We can talk about this over a juice box!
Tim: [pulls it back to use as a slingshot] Time for juice boxes is over!
Boss Baby: No! No, Templeton. You wouldn't.
Tim: Say bye bye, baby. You're fired!
[Ted and Janice enter the room and look shocked]
Ted: Tim! What are you doing?!
Tim: [looks at Ted] Nothing!
[Boss Baby looks at Ted and starts crying. Tim lets Boss Baby out of the jumper, accidentally shooting the tape out of the window, then it lands on the road and gets run over and got broken as a pssing car, much to Tim's horror.]
Tim: [gasps] My proof! [Boss Baby smiles triumphantly]
Janice: Tim, [takes Boss Baby] explain yourself!
Ted: Yes, explain yourself!
Tim: It wasn't me! It was the baby's fault! [points at Boss Baby]
Ted: The baby's fault?
Tim: It's true! He can talk! They all can talk! They're having a meeting! It's something about puppies! It's one big baby con - spy - racy!
Janice: Timothy Leslie Templeton! [Boss Baby snickers]
Ted: We are very disappointed in you.
Janice: No, we're mad at you!
Ted: Exactly, we're mad at you!
Tim: [disappointed] Mad?
Ted: You need a time out!
Janice: You're grounded.
Ted: Yes, grounded. For two...
Janice: Three!
Ted: Three! Days?
Janice: Weeks!
Ted: Weeks! Three weeks!
Janice: For three... EVERS!
Tim: [heartbroken] Grounded?
Janice: You're gonna stay in this house with your baby brother... [Boss Baby looks at Janice] until you learn to get along!
Boss Baby: [disappointed] Ugh, great.
[Tim looks down in sadness]
Toilet Head Chase (from Dialogue)
[edit]- Tim: There's only an hour before the plane takes off.
- Boss Baby: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Let's take the bike!
- Tim: Uh, the bike? Um... I don't know.
- Eugene: Aaaaarrrggh!
- Tim: Ah!
- Boss Baby: Let's move!
- Tim: Okay, but wait right here.
- Boss Baby: What? Where are you going? Templeton!
- Tim: Always wear a helmet.
- Eugene: AAAARRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!
- Boss Baby: Too-da-loo, toilet head!
- Tim: Ha! You'll never catch us!
- [?]
- Boss Baby: Staci! [over speaker] Staci, come in!
- [Staci cries]
- Woman: Oh, Staci.
- Staci: Is that you, boss?
- Boss Baby: Code red! I am being chased by a killer babysitter! Gather the team!
- Staci: On it, boss.
- Triplet One: Hello!
- Triplet Two: Hello!
- Triplet Three: Hello!
- Staci: Code red!
- Triplets: Got it! [?] We got a code red! Repeat. We got a code red!
- Boss Baby: What are you doing, Templeton? Go, go!
- Tim: But that's jaywalking!
- Boss Baby: Here, I'll pay your ticket. Go! [?]
- Tim: I think we lost him!
- Boss Baby: Oh no, we didn't! [?]
- Girl: [on recording] Flower power! [?]
- Jimbo: Pow, pow, pow, pow, pow, pow!
- Boss Baby: Ha-ha, that's my boy!
- Jimbo: [?] Poppy! [?] Run, run, run, run, run, run, run. [?]
- Triplets: Uh-oh.
- Jimbo: Run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run. [?]
Escaping with Mr. Lady Man (from Dialogue)
[edit]- [Tim and Boss Baby are riding a bicycle with training wheels, going after their parents, who are on their way to the airport, while being chased by Eugene]
- Boss Baby: Tim, you've gotta go faster!
- Tim: I can't! I can't do it!
- Boss Baby: You can! Ha![leaps up onto Tim's shoulder] You've got it in you, Templeton! Now, eyes ahead! I said eyes ahead, son! Buttocks up! Now pedal like you mean it! Either you run the day, or the day runs you. [Tim pedals faster, Eugene almost catches them, but Boss Baby dodges his grasp, and they get further away] Good! [the bicycle's training wheels break off] Uh-oh!
- Tim: Whoa! My training wheels! I can't ride without training wheels!
- Boss Baby: Whether you think you can or you think you can't, you're right!
- Tim: Ah! What are you talking about?
- Boss Baby: The path to success is not a straight line, Templeton, but rather a wild ride... like a ship at sea! And you're a sea captain, taming a turbulent ocean!
- [The scene transforms from a suburb to an ocean, with Tim and Boss Baby riding a boat]
- Tim: I'm a sea captain, taming the ocean!
- [They evade the incoming "whale"]
- Both: Ah!
- Boss Baby: Good!
- Tim: Tree! I'm gonna hit it!
- Boss Baby: Aim for failure, and you'll always succeed.
- Tim: What?
- Boss Baby: AIM AWAY FROM FAILURE!
- [Tim steers away from the tree, the scene transforms back into a suburb backdrop]
- Tim: I'm doing it, I'm doing it!
- [They travel through a forest, with Eugene close behind who is smashing past trees]
- Boss Baby: Once success is a habit, then it's all down...
- Tim and Boss Baby: HILL!
- [They ride down a hill, at which time, they see the car which their parents are in with Francis Francis]
- Tim: Look, there they are! Mom, Dad! [as the car passes the train crossing, the train passes by] Train!
- Boss Baby: Choo-choo! [They continue to approach the train crossing, with Eugene close behind] Templeton, stop! [Tim notices a mold of sand at a construction site next to the tracks, Tim steers towards it] What are you doing?
- [Tim pedals faster, the scene transforms into a ramp, with them riding a motorcycle, at the end of a ramp there is a ring of fire]
- Tim: We're gonna make it!
- Boss Baby: But I don't have a quote for this!
- [They jump, Boss Baby yells out "Aaahhh!", and they make it, as the scene transform back into the "real" world, Eugene crashes into the mold of sand, ending the pursuit]
- Boss Baby: (to Tim) You did it!
- Tim: No, we did it!
- Boss Baby: And all without your training wheels.
Brother Argument (from Dialogue)
[edit]- [Tim and Boss Baby see the plane taking off in the window at the airport]
- Tim: They're gone.
- Boss Baby: I failed.
- Tim: l would have gotten to my parents if l didn't have to go back for you!
- Boss Baby: What? We would have been here in plenty of time if you knew how to ride a bike like a normal kid! We're never gonna stop the launch in time.
- Tim: Who cares?! My parents are in danger!
- Boss Baby: I care! Baby Corp is going to go out of business!
- Tim: Uggh! That's all you ever talk about! You don't know what it's like to have a family!
- Boss Baby: And you don't know what it's like to have a job!
- Tim: You don't know anything! About hugs, or bedtime stories, or special songs!
- Boss Baby: Oh, please, stop acting like a baby!
- Tim: You're a baby!
- Boss Baby: [gasps in offense] You take that back.
- Tim: My life was perfect until you showed up!
- Boss Baby: Oh, believe me, kid, this feeling is neutral! I wish l never met you!
- Tim: I wish you'd never been born!!
- [Shocked and hurt by Tim's words, Boss Baby straightens his tie and leaves]
- Tim: Where are you going? Fine!
Taglines
[edit]- Born leader
- He means business. March 2017.
- He is the Boss. March 2017.
- Ruthless and Toothless!
- Cookies are for Closers!
- Who is the Boss?
Sequels
[edit]Soundtracks & Songs
[edit]- Survival of the Fittest
- Cheek to Cheek (from "Top Hat")
- Baby Brother
- We Can Buy a Bouncy House
- The Tra La La Song
- Theme from S. W. A. T.
- You Can't Get Away From Johnny Law
- Welcome to Baby Corp
- Super Colossal Big Fat Boss Baby
- Everytime I Turn Around (Back in Love Again)
- Puppy Co
- The Planets Op. 32
- Francis Francis
- Barfmitzvah
- Toodaloo Toilet-Head!
- I Wish You Were Never Born
- See See Rider
- Viva Las Vegas
- Alla en el Rancho Grande
- Arrrggh
- Ladies' Night
- You're Fired
- Upsies! I Need Upsies!
- You Want to Hug Me, Don't You?
- Love
- Go Get Yourself a Horse
- What the World Needs Now is Love
Cast
[edit]- Alec Baldwin — Boss Baby
- Miles Christopher Bakshi — Tim
- Tobey Maguire — Adult Tim / Narrator
- Steve Buscemi — Francis Francis
- Jimmy Kimmel — Ted
- Lisa Kudrow — Janice
- Conrad Vernon — Eugene
- James McGrath — Wizzie the Alarm Clock
- David Soren — Jimbo
- Eric Bell Jr. — The Triplets
- ViviAnn Yee — Staci
- Edie S. Mirman — Big Boss Baby
Additional Voices
[edit]- James Ryan — Connie / Story Bear
- Walt Dohrn — Photographer
- Jules Winter — Crying Boy / Little Boy / Boy
- Nina Zoe Bakshi — Tim's Daughter / Little Girl / Girl
- Brian Hopkins — Airport Security Guard
- Glenn Harmon — Airport Announcer
- Joseph Izzo — Elvis Impersonators
- Chris Miller — Captain Ross
- Andrea Knoll — Flight Attendant
- Frank Welker — Forever Puppies
- Chloe Albrecht — Hazmat Baby
External Links
[edit]
- The Boss Baby quotes at the Internet Movie Database
- The Boss Baby at Rotten Tomatoes
- The Boss Baby at Mojo
- Official website
| File:The Boss Baby Logo.png | ||
| Feature films | The Boss Baby (2017) · The Boss Baby: Family Business (2021) | |
 | |
| Feature films |  (1998) · The Prince of Egypt (1998) · The Road to El Dorado (2000) ·  (2000) ·  (2001) ·  (2002) ·  (2003) · Shrek 2 (2004) ·  (2004) ·  (2005) ·  (2005) · Over the Hedge (2006) · Flushed Away (2006) · Shrek the Third (2007) · Bee Movie (2007) ·  (2008) · Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa (2008) · Monsters vs. Aliens (2009) ·  (2010) · Shrek Forever After (2010) ·  (2010) · Kung Fu Panda 2 (2011) ·  (2011) ·  (2012) ·  (2012) ·  (2013) · Turbo (2013) ·  (2014) ·  (2014) ·  (2014) · Home (2015) ·  (2016) ·  (2016) · The Boss Baby (2017) · Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie (2017) · How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World (2019) · Abominable (2019) · Trolls World Tour (2020) · The Croods: A New Age (2020) ·  (2021) · The Boss Baby: Family Business (2021) ·  (2022) · Puss in Boots: The Last Wish (2022) ·  (2023) · Trolls Band Together (2023) ·  (2024) ·  (2024) ·  (2025)
|
| Short films | Shrek in the Swamp Karaoke Dance Party (2001) · Shrek 4D (2003) · Far Far Away Idol (2004) · Thriller Night (2011) · Puss in Boots: the Three Diablos (2012) |
| Television specials | Shrek the Halls (2007) · Scared Shrekless (2010) |
| Television series | The Penguins of Madagascar |
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Categories:
- Film stubs
- Pages with broken file links
- 2017 computer-animated films
- 2017 American animated films
- American computer-animated films
- American 3D animated films
- Animated buddy films
- American children's animated comedy films
- American children's animated adventure films
- Spy films
- Animated films about revenge
- Animated films about dogs
- Films about brothers
- Films about families
- Animated films about babies