The ClueFinders 4th Grade Adventures: Puzzle of the Pyramid

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The ClueFinders 4th Grade Adventures: Puzzle of the Pyramid is a computer game created by the Learning Company.

The ClueFinders[edit]

Professor Botch: Just think: This tomb has remained undisturbed for thousands of years.
Leslie: This is exciting.
LapTrap: (sarcastically) I'm all aquiver.
Professor Botch: Who knows what lies behind these doors? Untold treasures, perhaps.
LapTrap: (sarcastically) Oh great, mysteries! I hate mysteries!
Joni: LapTrap, shush.
Loveless: Just open the tomb, you silly little man.

(Joni has the Ring stuck on her finger)
Santiago: Well, Joni, I guess this makes you an international jewel thief.
Joni: Can you at least pretend you're helping, Santiago. I cannot get this thing off; it feels like it's holding onto my finger.
Owen: Maybe it likes you, Joni.
Leslie: It looks like some kind of ceremonial ring. You'd better let Professor Botch know you have it.
Joni: Okay, Leslie, I'll tell him tomorrow, but it's so embarrassing. I never should have touched this ring in the first place.
Socrates: [v.o.] We didn't know then, but Egypt was about to get a lot hotter...

Socrates: Just because the jeep has the most gas, doesn't mean that it can make it to Cairo. You have to multiply the numbers, to find out how far the jeep can go.

Joni: Yuck, coffee. Why do grownups drink this stuff?

Santiago: Oh no, I can't read a word of this. Can you help us out?
Antique Dealer: Kids these days. These are simple hieroglyphics. When did they stop teaching hieroglyphics in school?
Leslie: So what does it say?
Antique Dealer: Well, it goes something like this: (clears his throat)

"The threat to our land is deep and dark;

stopping it won't be a walk in the park


But you have proven worthy and wise,

what swell bunch of gals and guys


But when the pretender tries to take the throne,

you won't be able to stop him alone


You'll find allies at a secret place on the Nile,

but getting there may take you a while


You can't walk or fly there, you'll have to float;

so get out of here and go south in a boat"

Joni: Yuck!
Leslie: That has to be, the worst piece of poetry I have ever heard.

Map Mouse: I'm fresh out of gems, but I know you're wonderful! You'll work for free, right?

Set: [upon seeing the ClueFinders] What have we here? Even punier humans!
LapTrap: Hey, who are you calling human?

Scenes with Loveless and Professor Botch[edit]

Loveless: I have one question, professor. Where is the Ring?
Professor Botch: And what ring would that be?
Loveless: You know what I'm talking about, Professor; the Ring.
Professor Botch: The Ring!
Loveless: The Ring.
Professor Botch: The Ring!
Loveless: Do not mock me, professor.
Professor Botch: Don't mock you!
Loveless: You will tell me where to find the Ring, otherwise your students will... wait, your students, of course! [maniacal laughter]

Loveless: Once I have the Ring, we will be able to proceed with... the Ceremony.
Professor Botch: Oh, are you getting married? How lovely.
Loveless: I'm not getting married, you twit! I am an evil man, and I'm up to no good!
Professor Botch: Say, what sort of ceremony is this anyway?
Loveless: Ah, so you're finally beginning to understand! With the Ring, I will be able to focus the astro-energy that will unleash the power of Set.
Professor Botch: No!
Loveless: Yes!
Professor Botch: No! No!
Loveless: Yes! Yes!
Professor Botch: Oh my, this could be problem.
Loveless: [maniacal laughter]

Loveless: [laughs evilly for about 20 seconds, but suddenly coughs and chokes] I swallowed my mint.

Set: (to Loveless) People like you...give CHAOS a bad name.

Quips of the Sphinx[edit]

Sphinx: Well, what have we here? Look like a group of fresh young heroes. Unfortunately, I already had a hero sandwich for lunch. Who are you people, anyhow?
Joni: We're the ClueFinders! We're gonna stop the forces of chaos!
Sphinx: Ah, get outta here.
Santiago: No, really.
Sphinx: No, really; get outta here; but to get out, you're gonna have to open the door by selecting the secret answer.

Leslie: Hey, haven't we seen you before?
Sphinx: I don't think so. In fact, I'm not sure I'm seeing you now, you may be something I ate.

Owen: We must be going around in circles.
Sphinx: Actually, I'd say you're going around in a pyramid.

Joni: We're getting a little impatient with all this.
Sphinx: Good thing you're not doctors then. I wouldn't want to be one of your impatients.

Joni: I can't wait to get out of these tunnels.
Sphinx: Tunnels? You must be in a subway station. No wonder my plane hasn't shown up.

Owen: Oh man! It's that freaky dude with the head of a lion!
Sphinx: And the heart of a field mouse. Ironic, isn't it?

Sphinx: See you in the funny papers. Of course, if you're in them, they can't be all that funny.

Sphinx: That was terrific. Kids like you don't grow on trees, although many of the things that do are higher in Vitamin C.

Sphinx: Welcome to the deeper reaches of the Pyramid. Of course, you could tell that just by looking, couldn't you?

Sphinx: You kids had better go on and find your professor friend. You know, I once poked a professor in the temple--how he got into my temple I'll never know. (probably a parody of Groucho Marx's "I once shot an elephant in my pajamas" routine)

Santiago: Say, can't you tell us how to get through these tunnels?
Sphinx: I don't know about you, but the rest of my script is blank white paper.

Santiago: Say, can't you tell us how to get through these tunnels?
Sphinx: That's a good question. I'm very glad you asked that question! Now beat it.

Sphinx: What are you waiting for? If you want to get away from my jokes you have to go through that door--I wish I could.

Sphinx: Don't worry, I know you can do it, I read the script.

Sphinx: Congratulations. I don't think I've ever seen such a brilliant performance. Now move along so I can rehearse my speech for the next group of young adventurers.