Twin Town

From Wikiquote
Jump to: navigation, search

Twin Town (1997) is a 1997 British crime film filmed and set in Swansea, Wales. It was directed by Kevin Allen and had a working title of Hot Dog; a hot dog van features in a number of scenes in the film. It stars real-life brothers Rhys Ifans (in his first major movie role) and Llŷr Ifans along with Dougray Scott. The director appears on screen, briefly seen as a show host on a TV set in the static caravan home of the twins while co-writer Paul Durden briefly appears as a rude taxi driver.

Rugby. Tom Jones. Male Voice Choirs. Shirley Bassey. Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwyllllantisiliogogogch. Snowdonia. Prince of Wales. Anthony Hopkins. Daffodils. Sheep. Sheep Lovers. Coal. Slate Quarries. The Blaenau Ffestiniog Dinkey-Doo Miniature Railway. Now If That's Your Idea Of Thousands Of Years Of Welsh Culture, You Can't Blame Us For Trying To Liven The Place Up A Little Can You? (taglines)

Greyo[edit]

  • Adie, driving cars that don't belong to them, at 90 miles an hour, on the wrong side of the road, is just starting to take the fucking piss!

Bryn Cartwright[edit]

  • Here's 20 nicker, now go buy yourselves a nice big tin of sticky-sticky and fuck off back to Noddyland!
  • I built this club up from nothing, and I fucking loves it!

Fatty Lewis[edit]

  • This glue is for sticking my submarines, not for sticking up your fucking noses! Don't think I don't notice, cos I do. Buy your own fucking glue!

Terry Walsh[edit]

  • You're an iffy copper that does a little bit a this, a little bit a that, but knows where to draw the thin blue line right fuckin' wrong, don't ya, Greyo?

Dialogue[edit]

  • Greyo: Dylan Thomas called Swansea "an ugly, lovely town".
  • Terry: I'd call it... a pretty shitty city.
  • Greyo: Dylan Thomas didn't do as much fucking cocaine as you, did he?


  • Ivor: What can I have for twenty again?
  • Brothel Woman: Top exposed hand relief; Tits and hand shandies is it love?
  • Ivor: Gwelio
  • Brothel Woman: Righto then Ivor, Bon voyage. How's that love, hittin' the spot?
  • Ivor: Oh yea


  • Bryn: I'll have a chicken jalfrezi balti, half chips half rice, three onion bhajees, two naans and a grandfach!
  • Indian Waiter: Benju gandju [In Punjabi] You asshole sister fucker!


  • Lucy: She's a hooker Greyo
  • Greyo: Yeah and I'm a scrum-half


  • Adie: I'd better be off
  • Jeremy: Off to the brothel?
  • Jean: It's not a brothel, it's an executive health spa!
  • Jeremy and Julian: Health Spa AHHHHH!


  • Fatty: Cup of tea boys?
  • Adie: It's not a cup of tea they want, it's a good fucking hiding ask 'em who was kind enough to lend them the two tone BMW they been driving through the fucking night; Go on, ask 'em!
  • Jeremy: Fuck off you nosey bitch!
  • Jean: Charming!


  • Jeremy: Do you know what happens if they catches you doing drugs in Morocco?
  • Julian: No?
  • Jeremy: They hands you over to the fucking RUG squad. Aaaah I fuckin' had ew!


  • Jeremy: How is it that a 2 litre bottle of coke costs 27 pence, but a 1 litre bottle costs 37 pence?
  • Julian: Supa-dupa deal


  • Jeremy: How much for a shag Adie?
  • Adie: Awww dont worry lads, you can have family discount; but first we'll ave' to find your little willies first though!


  • Jeremy: What's your handicap, Bryn? [Smashes golf club into Bryn's knee]
  • Bryn: [In agony, with tape over his mouth] MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!
  • Jeremy: Not bad.


  • Terry: What the fuck does that mean Greyo?
  • Greyo: What does what mean?
  • Terry: That, "ambition is fucking critical."
  • Greyo: It says "ambition is critical." There's no "fucking" in it.

Taglines[edit]

  • Rugby. Tom Jones. Male Voice Choirs. Shirley Bassey. Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwyllllantisiliogogogch. Snowdonia. Prince of Wales. Anthony Hopkins. Daffodils. Sheep. Sheep Lovers. Coal. Slate Quarries. The Blaenau Ffestiniog Dinkey-Doo Miniature Railway. Now If That's Your Idea Of Thousands Of Years Of Welsh Culture, You Can't Blame Us For Trying To Liven The Place Up A Little Can You?
  • An extreme comedy.
  • Welcome to ugly lovely town

Cast[edit]

External links[edit]

Wikipedia
Wikipedia has an article about:
Wikipedia
Wikipedia has an article about: