The Amazing World of Gumball

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The Amazing World of Gumball (2011–2019) is an animated television series created by Ben Bocquelet for Cartoon Network. The series revolves around the lives of 12-year-old Gumball Watterson, a blue cat, and his goldfish best friend—adoptive brother 10-year-old Darwin, who attends middle school in the fictional city of Elmore.

Season 1

The DVD [1.01]

Gumball: Can you provide inspirational leadership to a core team of thirty people, covering both national or international markets?
Darwin: Mmm, no.
Gumball: Wait! how about this one? "Looking for a person with no skills or training to serve as a scientific subject for the cosmetics industry."
Darwin: What does that mean?
Gumball: It means they'll put makeup on us and see if it looks nice.
Darwin: [Gasp] Kind of like modeling?!
Gumball: Yeah.
Darwin: I've always thought I'd make a good model.
Gumball: What makes you think that?
Darwin: My cheekbones.
Gumball: There are bones in there?
[Gumball pushes his hand into Darwin's cheek tighter and tighter, then]
Gumball: Oh, huh. There are.

Gumball: See, Darwin, you should always tell the truth and face the consequences of your actions.
[Darwin looks surprised, then hugs Gumball for finally getting the lesson now]
Darwin: [Happy] Thanks, Gumball.

The Responsible [1.02]

Gumball: So, how do you feel, Darwin?
Darwin: Pretty responsible. And you?
Gumball: I feel like a new man, a responsible man.

The Third [1.03]

[Gumball is struggling to make it up the road]
Gumball: Ngh! Ngh! Ngh! Ngh! Ugh! Ugh! Agh! AGH!
[Gumball smiles as he thinks it is over but unfortunately it isn't, as more hills are shown from afar]
Gumball: AGH! [Echoing] GOSH....DARN IT!
[Scene fades to Gumball gradually going farther up the road as the day changes to evening]
Gumball: Ngh! Ngh! All because of those stupid ants and their stupid cookie! This is all their fault! [Mockingly] "Ooh! Look at me! I’m a third ant!" [Babbles] THOSE STUPID, STUPID ANTS! Oh! Made it to the top!

The End [1.05]

Gumball: Darwin, what are we doing here?
Darwin: Learning hard, so we can get a career, a home, and feed our children in the future.
Gumball: But there is no future, Darwin! We need to study and make the most of it RIGHT. NOW. Not listening to some baboon drone on about algebra or biology.

The Quest [1.07]

[Gumball, Darwin, and Anais are in their bedroom]
Anais: Listen, Gumball, I am not spending the night without Daisy. You'll just have to go to Tina's place and get her back.
Gumball: Me?! But why?
Anais: Because....because....[Makes a cute face] Because you were the one who lost it in the first place.
Gumball: [Makes a cute face too] But I'm just a little boy, and she's a giant T-Rex.
Anais: But you are my big brother.
Gumball: But I don't want to get my face pounded to a pulp.
[Both of them continue to exchange cute faces at each other until Gumball gives in]
Gumball: Okay. I'll go.
Anais: Hahahaha!
Gumball: But you two are coming with me.
[Darwin and Anais both cheer in acceptance]

The Pressure [1.09]

Darwin: [Whispering] Gumball!....
[Gumball looks under the table]
Darwin: [Whispering] I'm scared.....
Gumball: Darwin? I thought you ran away forever.
Darwin: I got hungry.....

Gumball: [Furious] What was THAT?!
Darwin: [Comes clean instead of being angry] This is all my fault, okay?... I... I owned up to Masami and asked her to go to the treehouse so I can kiss her, she was being manipulative I.... I backpedaled on my own... I... I didn't know what else to do... I'm sorry, Gumball.... [Walks off]
Gumball: Well, what are you gonna do now?!
Darwin: I know what I need to do, I know what I finally need to do to end all of this... [Leaves]
Gumball: W-What?....
Darwin: [Offscreen] I'm so sorry, man.....
Banana Joe: [With Tobias] And what happened to "pals before gals"?
Gumball: Look.... everything is cool, okay? I'll... I'll find a way to save him.
Banana Joe: You better, cause if you don't, we will.
[Banana Joe and Tobias leave]
Penny: [Passing by] Hi, Gumball.
[Gumball follows Penny happily while giggling]

The Painting [1.10]

Richard: [Whispers to Gumball] What did I just agree to?
Gumball: [Whispers back] You gotta get a job.
Richard: [Pulls his face in shock] NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Nicole: Well, thank you, Principal Brown. We'll do our best.
[The Wattersons, minus Richard, leave the office. Principal Brown looks at Richard as his screams begin to die down.]
Principal Brown: Uh, Mr. Watter --
[Richard starts screaming again.]

The Laziest [1.11]

[Richard is snoring on the couch and Gumball awakens him]
Richard: Huh? Well, that was a pretty long timeout.
Gumball: Yeah, but now we've got somebody who can beat you -- Lazy Larry.
Richard: Lazy Larry, huh? Why, that's a name I haven't heard since the summer of eighty-three ....
Gumball: NOBODY CARES ABOUT THE SUMMER OF EIGHTY-THREE!
Richard: Sorry... So, where is he?
Gumball and Darwin: Here!

The Mystery [1.13]

Gumball: I think cheese is better than cake, because you can have cheesecake, but you can't have cake cheese.

The Prank [1.14]

Gumball: Maybe we should just go outside again, this time through the front door.
Darwin: Good idea, Gumball!
Gumball: Okay, prepare to get wet.
[Gumball opens the door, but the bucket containing dried concrete falls in front of Gumball and Darwin almost hitting them]
Gumball: WHAT THE WHAT?!

Darwin: Gumball, what's wrong with you? You're hyperventilating! [grabs Gumball] Stop panicking, Gumball! Just calm down! (slapping Gumball) GET...A...GRIP! SNAP...OUT...OF...IT!!!
Gumball: CUT IT OUT! You're making it worse.
Darwin: Oh. Sorry. How's this? [rubs Gumball gently] Does that feel better?
Gumball: [calms down] Much better. Now hold me and tell me everything's gonna be okay.
Darwin: Everything's gonna be okay, buddy.
Gumball: How about a little kiss?
[Darwin kisses Gumball on the head. However, their moment of peace abruptly ends when Richard crashes through the wall, scaring them]
Richard: PRANK TIME!!

The Kiss [1.16]

Squirrel: Aww. Why so sad? You need to find your happy place!
[Beat]
Gumball: THERE IS NO HAPPY PLACE!!!! [The squirrel falls over from the loudness. Gumball starts sobbing] Oh, I'm sorry, little creature!
Darwin: [sobs] I'm sorry I couldn't help you forget.
[The squirrel starts sobbing as well]

Gumball: [Screaming] Aw man, that was intense.
Soup: Give us a kiss!
[Gumball wakes up for real]
Gumball: NOOOOO!!!!!
[Gumball and Anais scream; Gumball then stops screaming, and sighs three times]
Anais: Oh, come on! That's the fifth time tonight!

The Party [1.17]

Darwin: I feel awkward.

The Refund [1.18]

Darwin: [Shouts at Gumball in excitement] Come on! Put the game on!
Gumball: [Opens the disc tray] Come on, come on. [Gasps] Oh, there you are. [Attempts to insert the cartridge in the disc tray, but it obviously does not fit] There's something wrong with it!
Darwin: [Shouting] Try the other way around! [Shakes flippers]
[Gumball tries again, to no avail]
Darwin: [Shouting] Come on! Can't you see I'm practically flipping my flippers?
Gumball: What is that supposed to mean?
Darwin: [Anxiously flapping his flippers] IT MEANS PUT THE GAME ON!
Gumball: I can't! It's not working!
[Darwin stops flipping his flippers]
Gumball: [Looks at the game cartridge] I think we got stiffed.

The Robot [1.19]

Gumball: What’s that?
Bobert: It’s the algorithm for smile.
Gumball: Bobert... [throws Bobert’s smile algorithm away] You’ve got a lot to learn, If you want to be real, then you had to have proper emotions.
Bobert: Define emotions.
Gumball: You know... Like feelings and stuff.
Bobert: Define feelings.
Gumball: You know... When you feel things... Like pain.
Bobert: Define pain.

The Picnic [1.20]

Darwin: Did she say avoid or go through the Forest of Doom?
Gumball: [Sighs] What would I do without you, Darwin? She said go through the Forest of Doom. Am I right, or am I wrong, Miss Simian?

Gumball: Darwin, you know what's important in a situation like this?
Darwin: A map?
Gumball: [Laughs loudly, then sighs] No, teamwork.
Darwin: Oh. I was gonna say that next.
Gumball: Don't worry, buddy. You're part of my team, and I'm a born survivor!
Darwin: I'm glad I'm on your team! Hey, little squirrels! [Walks off]

The Sock [1.23]

Gumball: Hmm...Okay, I think I got it. You should always tell the truth, unless you have to lie, but if you do lie, you should tell the truth about it, unless you're talking to someone who's lying, because if they tell a lie and you tell the truth for once, then it'll be a lie because you were lying about telling the truth, inside of a lie, so the whole thing is a lie while you are still being true in your heart.
[Having overheated from all the exposition, Darwin's head explodes, and his body lies down to the floor]

The Wand [1.29]

[Gumball and Darwin are playing with a plastic toy wand that they got from a cereal box.]
Richard: [Gasps] Magic wand! [Runs, then falls over] Can I have a turn?
Gumball: Sure, but it doesn't really --
Richard: Cool! With this, I can make all my wishes come true. [Waves wand] My first wish is that this doesn't turn out to be a big fraud. Like that stupid wishbone!
Gumball: What wishbone?
Richard: Well, when I was a boy about your age...
[A flashback plays, where a young Richard and Granny Jojo break a wishbone.]
Young Richard: I wish that the sausages would fly into my mouth. [He opens his mouth, but nothing happens] Mom, I made a wish on the wishbone but nothing happened.
Granny Jojo: What did you think, that it was gonna come true? Magic isn't real.
Young Richard: [Gasps] You mean, it's a fraud?
Granny Jojo: Yeah, it's a fraud.
[Richard screams throughout his childhood, including his teenage years, which we hear him hitting puberty.]
Richard: [Voice-over] And I didn't stop screaming for 15 years.
[Richard can be seen screaming in his yearbook photo. As an adult, he screams at the movies, and finally, during his and Nicole's wedding. Flashback ends.]
Richard: I never believed in anything again. But I believe this will be different. Now, I've got some wishing to do! Hehe, hehe, hehe!

The Car [1.31]

Gaylord: This is what happens when you mess with Gaylord! [He and Margaret start destroying Richard's car] This is what happens! THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS! THIS... IS... WHAT... HAPPENS!
Richard: They look kind of angry, Gumball.
Donut Cop: Please, stop! Please!
[Margaret turns around, hissing, as she is about to assault the Doughnut Sheriff with the duster, making him more nervous]
Donut Cop: Please, ma'am, drop the duster! Please! No, ma'am! [Pulls out his taser] No, no! [Zaps Margaret]
[Margaret falls down, The Doughnut Sheriff realizes his mistake, and Gaylord slowly turns his head to see the electrocuted Margaret, assuming she is dead]
Gaylord: [In slow-motion] MARGARET!!
Donut Cop: No, sir! No, please!
[Gaylord angrily jumps over the Doughnut Sheriff, ready to attack him with the golf club, then camera cuts to the electrified Gaylord and Margaret]
Nicole: Maybe we should give them time to calm down.

The Curse [1.32]

Gumball: Well, it seems like it's just not my day, but that's ok, because it's nothing a good song won't fix! [Singing] When life hands you lemons, you gotta make some lemonaaaade... [Breathes in, about to sing louder, but is stepped on by Hector]

Banana Joe: Where did you get your clothes, the Lost and Found?! Hahaha!
Gumball: Well actually, yes, I did.
Banana Joe: Ohh, where did you get your clothes, the circus?! Haha!
Gumball: Dude, we kind of just went over this already, Lost and Found.
Banana Joe: Where did you get your clothes, the swim shop and the hat shop?! Hahaha!
[Principal Brown opens the door]
Gumball: WHERE DID YOU GET YOUR BRAIN FROM, THE DOLLAR STORE?!
[Sees Principal Brown leaving him shocked, Banana Joe and Idaho walk away, Gumball smiles nervously at Principal Brown]

Darwin: Yay! I wished for snow!

Season 2

The Colossus [2.02]

Mrs. Jötunheim: What have you done to my son?!
Gumball: Improved his life?
Mrs. Jötunheim: What's the one thing you know about giants?!
Gumball: ...That they're big?
Mrs. Jötunheim: Yes, and so are their emotions! I wasn't making his life boring, I was making his life calm! You have to keep giants calm!
Gumball: Why?
Mrs. Jötunheim: Because if you don't, then that happens!
[In the distance, Hector is attacking the town and causing destruction]
Hector: IS THIS BORING, OR THIS?! DO YOU THINK THIS IS BORING?! CALL ME BORING NOW! [Swipes down the Robinson's house] IS THIS BORING?!
[Margaret is in shock about the house]
Gaylord: [Reading newspaper] Close the window, Margaret.
Donut Cop: Freeze! Police!
[Hector squashes the police car]
Donut Cop: Well, uhh, I think I'll-uh call it a day. [Runs off on foot]
[Hector approaches the senior citizens and yells]
Hector: I'M NOT BOOOORIIIINGGG!
[The senior citizens, except for Louie, are blown away]
Louie: What did he say?
[Back at Hector's Cave]'
Darwin: Gumball, what do we do? We have to stop him!
Gumball: [Notices brooms in the cave] I got it! [Grabs a broom] We'll just fly after him using one of your witch brooms! [Attempts to "fly," but falls flat on his face]
Mrs. Jötunheim: That's a normal broomstick. I'm a cleaning lady.
Gumball: [Face down on the ground] Oh.
Mrs. Jötunheim: [Takes off her hair clip] The witchy ones are over there.
Gumball: [Quietly] I knew it.

The Banana [2.06]

Banana Joe: HEY! Turn around, you cowards.
Gumball: [Laughs] No, thank you!
Banana Joe: Turn around and face the can of butt-whooping that I'm gonna open on you!
Darwin: Wouldn't it be better to stay like we are for that?
Banana Joe: TURN AROUND!
(Gumball and Darwin have a silent debate of whether or not to face the consequences. Their conversation goes on for a few seconds before....)
Gumball: [Inhales] Okay. [He and Darwin turn around]
[Banana Joe screams as he charges towards Gumball and Darwin, but slips on a water puddle, rushes under them and hits a water fountain, face first. He groans as he slowly becomes unconscious and a bruise covers his face]

Gumball: Oh, that's just great! Now, people are gonna come around the corner, see him like that, and think we're massive bullies!
Darwin: (kneels down, crying) Which we are! Because of us, he lost an eye, and we attacked him with a mirror! We punctured his tube of glue, we chewed everything in his locker, he got a huge brown banana bruise on his little face, and we managed to ruin the most precious thing his family ever owned!
(They both cry in guilt)
Gumball: He did chew that pen, though.

The Phone [2.07]

Gumball: [Sighs] Darwin, we need to talk.
Darwin: Uhh yeah.
Gumball: You know, I love you man.
Darwin: Uh huh.
Gumball: But... I think you have a problem with that phone!
Darwin: Yeah.
Gumball: So I've arranged for your butt to be surgically grafted onto your face.
Darwin: Yeah, yeah sure great.
Gumball: YOU'RE NOT EVEN LISTENING!
Darwin: Why don't you text me?

Ocho's Mom: Ow! Ocho, what are you doing? You're not fighting again, I hope.
Ocho: Oh gosh, did I get a little too intense again?
Gumball: Psh! Nah. Totally normal level of intensity.
Ocho: Are you sure?
Gumball and Darwin: Yeeah.
Ocho: [Gets angrier] Are you sure?!
Gumball: Hoo! Yes. Yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah.
Darwin: Yes.
Ocho: [Demonic voice] ARE YOU SURE?!!
Gumball: Ye-e-e-es! Please go home now!
Ocho's Mom: Oh, that's good. He can get a little carried away at times. Come on, Ocho! Dinner's ready.
Ocho: See you tomorrow guys!
[Ocho moves towards his mother, and a tractor beam pulls him up.]
Ocho: Can I sit in the front, Mom?

The Job [2.08]

(The episode opens on Nicole, who is whimpering in her sleep in the front lawn. Anais touches her face to wake her up.)
Anais: Mom, wake up!
Nicole: AHH!
Gumball: Mom, are you alright?
Nicole: Oh, I just had the weirdest dream. I was out on the front lawn and your father had a job as a pizza delivery guy.
Richard: (Offscreen, then shown in a delivery boy outfit) That wasn't a dream. That's what I just told you---and you fainted! (chuckles)

(Back at the house..)
Nicole: Your father has a job. Your father has...a job.
(Anais is holding Nicole's hand to comfort her, but the woman suddenly jumps up to her.)
Nicole: Something's gonna go terribly wrong, isn't it?!?
Anais: No, this is a good thing. We can finally buy all the things we need.
Nicole: What do you mean? We got everything we need.
Anais: (picks up a family photo) Mom, we've all been wearing the same clothes for the past year, you three don't even have any shoes, (whispers) and I think it's about time Darwin wore some pants.

(Back at the house, Nicole is huddled in a blanket, hyperventilating while Anais sits beside her, comforting her.)
Anais: Mom, when you say "Dad having a job has upset the fundamental balance of the universe," are you sure you don't just mean he's changed the balance of power in the house, and that upsets you because you're a little bit of a control freak?
Nicole: No. Maybe.... I don't know anymore!
(Gumball and Darwin enter the house)
Nicole: Boys! What's going on with your father?! Has something terrible happened?!
Gumball: Well, he dropped a few pizzas, so we delivered 'em. That's about it.
Nicole: Maybe I should just forget about all this...

The Treasure [2.10]

Gumball: You know, that good stuff's got me thinking, what else is cheap in this house?
[Gumball, Darwin, and Anais walk into the living room]
Gumball: I mean, look at this MP3 player. Now tell me it's not a calculator with headphones stuck in it. [Grabs a copy of "HOW TO RATATWANG YOUR PANDA"] And that DVD is not even the real film. It's some mockbuster from the bargain bin.
Richard: What's wrong with "How to Ratatwang Your Panda"?
[On the TV Screen, a section of the film plays, taking place in a dojo]
Good CGI Mouse: Get ready, panda, use your secret weapon.
Chuck the Panda: Okay, you asked for it. [Does a massive fart in the other mice's face]
Bad CGI Mice: Oh, boy!
[Cuts back to the couch]
Richard: HAHAHAHAHA! HEHAHA! [Sighs] Clever.
Gumball: And look at this "blender". You really call this top-of-the-line?
[Gumball turns on the blender, actually a fan blade above a bowl, and puts an orange in it, causing its juice to fly onto the ceiling]
Gumball: Why can't we have the good stuff?
Anais: More importantly, what's mom hiding?
[The home phone rings, and Anais answers]
Anais: Hello?
Spooky Voice: For your own safety, stop digging around. There's nothing to find.
Anais: Okay, but if we were going to start digging, where should we look?
Spooky Voice: Definitely not the attic. Ah! No, wait--! Oh, darn--.
[The voice hangs up as Anais cleverly laughs]

The Apology [2.11]

Darwin: [Still whispering to Principal Brown] Maybe you should say something.
Principal Brown: [Suddenly stops spitting] Yes, I suppose.
[Principal Brown walks to Miss Simian, and whispers something into her ear]
Ms. Simian: [Gasps whilst pulling her dress down] You knew about this, and you thought it was funny, didn't you?!
[Gumball and Darwin simultaneously shake their heads]
Ms. Simian: YOU THINK THIS IS FUNNY?!
Principal Brown: Lucy, please. I think you owe them an apology.
Ms. Simian: Don't you "Lucy" me, Nigel! These kids tried to make a monkey out of me, and you want me to apologize?!
Principal Brown: Uh, you kids are free to go.
[Gumball and Darwin leave]
[Miss Simian goes "ape" and throws furniture around, while making monkey sounds. Gumball and Darwin listen to Miss Simian's rampage outside Brown's office]
Gumball: Hmm. There's one thing I don't understand.
Darwin: Yeah, why did she go ape when we just tried to help her?
Gumball: No, why do monkeys have hair all over their bodies, except for the ugly part where they need it the most?

The Words [2.12]

Darwin: Dude, I need you to grab the emergency hammer.
Gumball: I'm not breaking the window.
Darwin: No, I need you to knock me out.
Gumball: How about you just ask Sussie to calm down a little?
Darwin: [Whimpers again] I can't...
Gumball: What the... [Pauses video game] You're embarrassed, aren't you?
Darwin: Just use the hammer...
Gumball: [Laughs] Darwin Watterson, the fish who grew legs at the expense of his guts!
Darwin: Shut up!
Sussie: HEY, DARWIN!
[Darwin squeezes his head back out]
Sussie: Which noise do you prefer? ALALALALALALALALALALALALA! or AKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKA!
Gumball: [Sticks head on top of Sussie and Darwin's seat] Excuse me, Sussie, but can you be a little quieter, please?
Sussie: Certainly, young Gumball, I'd be more than happy to oblige!
Gumball: Thank you.
Darwin: [Gapes before sticking his head up and motions taking his hat off]
Gumball: What's that?
Darwin: That was me, taking my hat off to you.
Sussie: [Whispers] Hats!

Darwin: Was it...REALLY necessary...to take me over the sandbox?

Gumball: I didn't want to do this, man, but it's the only way! You need to learn that words can hurt.
Game Voice: Round 1! Fight!
Darwin: [charging a power blast] Your head is so big that you have to put your shirt on feet first! [Shoots energy balls at Gumball] Big head! Big head! Big head! Big head!
Gumball: Ow! Stop It!
Darwin: [Shoots an energy ball] Big head!
Gumball: That's cheating!
Darwin: [Shoots an energy ball] Big head!
Gumball: You keep using the same move!
Darwin: [Shoots an energy ball] Big head!
[Gumball echoes and collapses]
Game Voice: Darwin wins! Perfect! Round Two! Fight!
Gumball: You're so ugly that when you entered an ugly contest, the judges said "no professionals"! [Shoots an energy ball]
Darwin: You're so dumb you put stamps on your e-mails! [Shoots an energy ball]
Gumball: You're so short that your head smells like feet! [Shoots an energy ball]
Darwin: Your brain's so small that your thoughts have an echo! [Shoots an energy ball]
Gumball: Your cheeks are so big that people don't know which end of you they're looking at! [Shoots an energy ball]
[Camera cuts to reality, Tobias, Banana Joe, Anton and Bobert cheers looking unamazed while Gumball and Darwin are still pretending to be in the game]
Gumball: Pshoo! Cling! Pew!
Darwin: Ahh!
Gumball: Your face is so greasy that people put on weight when they look at you! [Shoots an "energy ball"]
Tobias​​​​​​​: Nyeh, it's not as good as I thought it'd be.
[Tobias, Banana Joe, Anton and Bobert leave, still making cheering motions. Camera cuts back to the game]
Gumball: You're so bald that when you take a shower, you get brainwashed!
Darwin: You're so-- Ah! I got nothing!
[Gumball shoots an energy ball that dazes Darwin. He immediately closes in for the finish.]
Gumball: You're so chubby, the back of your head looks like a pack of wieners.
[Gumball takes Round 2 with a Street Fighter-esque uppercut move. He then performs a victory pose]
Game Voice: FINAL ROUND!
Gumball: Wait a minute. Pause! [pauses the "game"]

The Skull [2.13]

Clayton: [Panicking] GUYS, GUYS, GUYS! [Gumball and Darwin stare at him angry] The skull guy, he's real, HE'S REAL!
Gumball: [Sarcastically] Yeah, sure. The skull guy that I made up actually exists. Oh, don't tell me. He's seven feet tall, covered in tattoos, and he's about to burst into those very-
[Razor burst and breaking into the doors with his guitar growling looking at Gumball, Darwin and Clayton]
Gumball: [Surprised] doors.
Clayton: [Determined] You know what time it is?
Gumball: [Scared] Time to change my pants?
Clayton: No, it's 'TIME TO KICK SOME BUTT!

The Watch [2.16]

Gumball: Ugh, I HATE IT! This watch is wonder-weak, it doesn't even tell the time! What the derp does V past X supposed to mean?
Darwin: Did you get that from dad?
Gumball: Yeah. Why do you ask?
Darwin: He offered it to me first. He told me this really long, boring story full of people I didn't care about, then I said "No! I don't want no busted-up cowboy junk!"
[beat]
Gumball: (gives Darwin the watch) Can you hold this? I need to tie my shoelace.
Darwin: Okay. (realizes the error) Wait, you don't wear shoes!
[Gumball emerges on the seat behind Darwin]
Gumball: He who holds it owns it.
[Darwin groans. At school...]
Darwin: Alright, alright. I'll keep it. But on one condition: at any point if dad offers us a better present, I get dibs. Deal?
Gumball: (shakes Darwin's hand) Deal.
Darwin: (smirking) Now check your hand.
Gumball: What? This one...(shows his empty hand) or this one? (whispering) Now check yours.
[Darwin checks his hand--still holding the watch!]
Darwin: WHAT?!?! (looks at the hallway) DOUBLE WHAT?!?!
[At the other end of the hall, Gumball is flashing his hands around to taunt Darwin before leaving.]

Darwin: I gave it to an old man.
Gumball: WHAT?!
Darwin: I said "I GAVE IT TO AN OLD MAN!"
Gumball: (whispering) Shh! I heard you the first time! It's just that you (yelling) DON'T GIVE AWAY FAMILY HEIRLOOMS TO SOME RANDOM GUY!
Darwin: I thought we were trying to get rid of it.
Gumball: (sighs) What's dad gonna say?
Darwin: (gasps) Is he gonna cry? Because if he's gonna cry, I'll cry...
Gumball: (hugging Darwin) Aw, come here, bubble cheeks. It was my fault as well.
Darwin: (whispering) So, since it's obviously your fault, you're gonna get it back, right?
Gumball: (whispering) Well, I wouldn't have if you weren't such a slack-jawed goober and gave it to him.
Darwin: But this wouldn't have happened if you weren't such an ungrateful jerk in the first place.
Gumball: You do it.
Darwin: No, you do it!
Gumball: No, you do it!
Richard: (whispering) What are you guys talking about?
(The boys see Richard joining their hug.)
Gumball: Uh, how much we love the watch.
Richard: (whispering) I love you guys.

[In the Wattersons' kitchen, nothing happens in the scene for a while, until Gumball pops out from the sink]
Gumball: [Gasps for air] I can't hide like this anymore, we're just gonna have to tell Dad the truth.
[Darwin pops out of a Super Golden Flakes cereal box]
Darwin: Oh sure, great plan. So how do you want to do it? You can start by rejecting his love, while I sucker punch him with the lack of respect that we have for his entire family heritage or, if you prefer, I'll just rip out his heart while you TEAR HIS SOUL IN HALF!
Gumball: Get out of your box, you just gave me an idea.

[At home, Gumball, Darwin and Richard watch an antique shop show on TV]
Antique Vendor: This coffee table is worth $100!
Buyer: Wow!
Antique Vendor: However, this coffee stain brings the value down to about $10.
[The Watterson boys laugh at this, but their attention is brought to the next item]
Antique Vendor: Now, this pocket watch is a very special piece. Only two were ever made, so I think it's worth approximately...$700.
[The Buyer gapes, and so does Gumball, Darwin and Richard]

The Authority [2.19]

Granny Jojo: If you think I'm letting you send them out into danger, you got another thing coming!
Nicole: Well, if you think I'm gonna let you mess with my family anymore, you got this chair coming!
[Nicole takes the chair and hits Granny Jojo but the chair bounces off]
Nicole: What the?!
Granny Jojo: Good luck trying to stop me, Nicole. I've safe-proofed this whole house.
[Nicole throws a flower pot at Granny Jojo but it bounces off again]
Granny Jojo: Everything breakable is now plastic.
[Nicole takes a lamp and hits Granny Jojo but it bounces off]
Granny Jojo: Everything else is rubber.
[Nicole takes a painting and hits Granny Jojo but the paper tears and goes through Granny Jojo]
Granny Jojo: Apart from that, which was paper. A good mother prevents accidents before they happen.
[Scene changes to a fire background with Nicole's eyes burning with anger]
Nicole: I AM A GOOD MOTHER!
[Nicole pounces on Granny Jojo and starts pulling her ear and uses her hand to slap her face]
Nicole: Say it!
Granny Jojo: No!
Nicole: Say it!
Granny Jojo: No!
Nicole: SAY I AM A GOOD MOTHER!
[Scene changes back to Richard and the trio who are still squeezing out of the door, then Anais pops out and hits the car]
Anais': [Puts her finger on his lips] Hmmmm...
[Scene changes back to Nicole who is still slapping Granny Jojo until they hear the car's engine starting]
[Scene changes to the street as Nicole and Granny Jojo watch Richard drive off]
Granny Jojo: NOOOOOO! You've sent them to a highway of eternal doom in a chariot of pain and despair! MY BABIES! MY BABIES!!
Nicole: Oh please, Richard is perfectly capable of driving to the store.
[Richard runs a red light, causing a major traffic accident]
Nicole: [Shocked] I'll get the car.

The Pony [2.21]

[The episode opens at the video store, where Gumball is trying to rent a movie, but, inexplicably, an invisible barrier is standing in his way as he struggles to put the film on the counter.]
Larry: What's wrong with you this time?
Gumball: (straining) This movie is so sucky, my body refuses to rent it.
Larry: Then don't rent it and get out of here.
Gumball: NO! I promised my sister!
Darwin: (takes the movie from Gumball) Here, let me try.
[Darwin runs to the counter, but the barrier emits a powerful force that knocks him back, causing him to fall backfirst.]
Darwin: You're right. This movie's so bad that every atom in my body refuses to pay to see it.
Carrie: (views the film's cover) Oh, come on. It can't be that bad. (gasps) A Pony's Tail?

(After she breaks through the barrier, Carrie, Gumball and Darwin exit the store as the former gives the boys the movie.)

Carrie: You know, there are less painful ways to hurt your eyes. You could pour salt in them while staring at the sun, for example.
Gumball: I'm sorry, Carrie, but we promised Anais we'd do something she wanted today.
Darwin: We never realized how unbearable it'd be, and we haven't even watched it.
Gumball: Come on, we're already late!

(At Carrie's house, she ended up with the boys' movie, gaping while watching. Gumball and Darwin rush in.)

Gumball: Carrie! (checks Carrie, then speaks to Darwin, quietly) I think her horror movie brain got traumatized by an overload of pony cuteness.
Carrie: I THOUGHT I WAS A HARDCORE HORROR MOVIE FAN, BUT I WAS LIVING A LIE! (grabs Gumball by his shirt) Tell me, is it wrong for a punk-rock chick who lives in a haunted, malevolent mansion to be touched by the magical friendship of a pony?
Gumball: Uh...no. But could you tell your pet to stop rubbing itself on my leg, 'cause that's kinda wrong.
[Below, a translucent, disembodied hand rubs Gumball's leg.]
Carrie: That's not a pet. That's my grandma.
[Gumball makes a confused face.]
Carrie: What?
Gumball: What does she eat?
Carrie: I don't know. She kinda bites her nails sometimes.
Darwin: WE ARE NOT HERE TO DISCUSS CARRIE'S FREAK SHOW OF A FAMILY! WHERE IS THE DVD?!
Carrie: Uh, it's in the DVD player.
Darwin: Really? After all that's happened today, I didn't think it'd be that easy as pushing a button to-
[When Darwin presses the eject button, the DVD flies out of the window.]
Darwin: Yeah. That makes more sense.

The Hero [2.22]

Gumball: Anais! Come on! You've been in there forever!
[Anais peeks from behind the door]
Anais: Oh, I'm sorry. But as Mom pays the water bill and you two are insensitive brats, I think you'll need to shower somewhere else. [She closes the door]
Gumball: [Mockingly] As Mom pays the water bill, I think you should shower somewhere else.
Anais: [From behind the door] You can say what you like, but you're not going to annoy me!
Gumball: [Mockingly] You can say what you like, but you're not going-- [A soap bar flies from behind the door, hitting Gumball squarely in the face. His nose swells up] Ow! My...nose!
Anais: [Mockingly] Ow! My dose!
Gumball: [Growls, then chuckles] Who's the loser now? We got soap. All we need is water.
[Outside the Watterson house. The boys are on the street, in front of a puddle. They are lathering up with soap]
Darwin: Dude, I think I'm starting to regret this challenge.
Gumball: It's coming! [A truck passes by, splashing mud onto the boys] Ugh. I think I should've closed my mou-- [Another vehicle passes by, and the boys are splashed again]

Darwin: So, you ready to apologize now?
Gumball: Nope.
Rocky: [Holding his nose] Uh, boys? I'm gonna have to ask you to get off the bus.
Gumball: Why?
Rocky: 'Cause the suspension can't take it anymore.
[The rest of the students are at the rear of the bus, away from Gumball and Darwin. It itself is tipping over. The boys jump onto the street]
Gumball: Okay, I guess I'm ready now. [Scene cuts to the Wattersons' backyard] Ugh! I can't believe we're apologizing.
Darwin: I don't care. I'm not eating canned rats again.

The Photo [2.25]

Gumball: Because your face is a muscle. The more you train it, the more awesome it looks.


The Tag [2.26]

Richard: And the police said I have to wear this thing for...
[Changes to Mr. Robinson's house]
Gaylord: Six weeks. And I can't leave the house or it...
[Back to Wattersons' house]
Richard: Sets off an alarm and I'll be...
[Back to Robinson's house]
Gaylord: Sent to prison. And it was all...
Richard and Gaylord: HIS FAULT!
Gumball: Dad, could you explain that again, this time using full sentences?
Richard: I'd love to, but I'm too busy...
Gaylord: [off scene] Plotting my revenge!
[All the Wattersons hear Mr. Robinson shouting]
Darwin: Hmm... I can clearly see what is happening here.
Richard: Boys, I need you to sneak into Mr. Robinson's house. There's this old prank I used to do in collage.
Gumball: [quizzically] College?
Richard: Okay, high school. Just do as I say.

The Storm [2.27]

Alan​​​​​​​: No, I love you more because I also love, loving you—
Gumball: Sorry to interrupt. But can you please stop this?
Alan​​​​​​​: What?
Gumball: THIS! This hideous picture of happiness.
[Masami, Carrie and Leslie chime in, agreeing with Gumball]
Gumball: I'm don't like it when you two use your stupid pet names and your gross lovey-dovey faces. You don't see me and Penny acting like that.
Darwin: Because you're not going out with her?
Gumball: Exactly. [sighs]
Idaho: You two are so beautiful, it makes me believe I, too, can find love. [Angrily] But when I look in the mirror, I realize I'm just a dirt covered ball of starch!
[Alan moves to Idaho]
Alan​​​​​​​: But Idaho, if you wanna be loved... first, you gotta love yourself.
Leslie​​​​​​​: [Angrily] Yeah! You're so nice and sensitive too I can't even hate you!
Masami: [Angrily] You're so perfect, it makes me wanna rain on your parade until you swell up, turn brown, and rot!
[Carrie is confused, while everyone is silent]
Carrie: [Clicks tongue] Uhhhh... I think what Masami is trying to say is that you guys are so perfect, it kinda makes us wish for your downfall.
Masami: Uh-huh, why don't you go and be perfect somewhere else?
Idaho: Yeah.
Leslie: Well said, Carrie.
[Everyone walks away except Alan, Carmen, Gumball and Darwin. Gumball looks guilty, while Darwin pats him on the back]

The Limit [2.30]

Anais: Mom, instead of milk, can we have chocolate milk?
Nicole: No.
Darwin: Instead of eggs, can we have chocolate eggs?
Nicole: No.
Gumball: Instead of bread, can we have chocolate bread?
Nicole: No.[Sighs] Richard, can I get a little help here, please?
Richard: Sure. [Walks to the kids] Here kids, [Grabs a chocolate bar] stop bothering your mother and eat this chocolate.
[Nicole groans and swiftly kicks the chocolate bar out of Richard's hand]
Gumball: What the...?! Well what's the point in dragging us here if we're not getting some kind of treat?!
Nicole: [Strained voice, speaks through gritted teeth] Because we're having a nice family outing and that should be reward enough.
[Gumball starts to whimper]
Nicole: Don't you dare...
Gumball: [Screams and cries while lying down and bangs on the floor] I WANT THE CHOCOLATE EGGS!
[Nicole sighs, and just as Anais and Darwin copy Gumball, Richard starts screaming. Gary walks by and gives Nicole a judgmental stare]
Nicole: [Grabs two cans of hot dogs and speaks in a high-pitched voice while staring at the one on her right hand] Oh, Mommy, I want some chocolate. [Stares at the one on her left hand in a normal pitched voice] I'm sorry, little sausage, but you had too much candy this week. [Closes her eyes in a high pitched voice] WAH WAH WAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH! [Squeezes the can in her right hand so hard it explodes; normal voice] Now all the little sausages are punished and going to have to wait in the car.

Gumball: You paranoid nut bar, that stuff doesn't work.
Anais: Then why are you holding a basket full of lipstick?
Gumball: Three colors, five dollars! It'd be stupid not to buy it!
[As Anais stares at him, Gumball realizes what she's saying]
Gumball: This. Is. Perfect! If we use those tricks on Mom, we can get anything we want! It's foolproof! [Starts singing happily] Who's getting candy? [Points at Anais] Owww, you're getting candy! Uh! Uh! [Starts dancing]
Darwin: I'm getting candy! [Twirls around] And he's getting candddddy!
Richard: I'm getting candy?! [Pretends to shred on an air guitar] Uhn! Uhn! She's getting candy! [Points at Anais]
Anais: Mmm, mmm, mmm-mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm! I'm getting candy, [Points at each of the three boys] you're getting candy, he's getting candy, he's getting candy, she's—
Nicole: GET BACK TO THE CAR!
[The Wattersons walk out in disappointment]

The Voice [2.31]

Darwin: (Whistles) Hey, William! Feast your eye on this! (He squirts shampoo on Williams’s eye but missed, squirted in his face.) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! OOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWW! It's not that bad [Chuckles] It's baby shampoo.
[William focuses on Darwin]
Gumball': Watch out!
[Gumball pushes Darwin out of the way, just as William unleashes his psychic power at the spot where Darwin was. He crumples some pipes, causing the room to fog up]
William: You cannot hide from me. Turn Around. Turn around, and face me like men! I am talking to you.
[Gumball and Darwin are huddled in a corner. Gumball sights William coming at them through the fog]
Gumball: [Whispering] There he is, creeping up on us in silence again.
William: In silence? [Realizes no one can hear him] Oh, gosh. No one can hear me, can they? I suppose that makes sense, I don't have a mouth. I thought you'd ignored me on purpose all my life. But when you blocked me on Elmore Plus, something...snapped. What was I thinking? I'm so sorry. You must be terrified and confused, I cannot apologize enough-
Darwin: NOW! [They turn around, with Gumball holding a tennis racket. He swats William, and William flies out of a window]

The Castle [2.33]

Anais: [Squirts whipped cream into her mouth] And it's Dad who's looking after us. [Squirts some more whipped cream into her mouth]
[Gumball jumps into Darwin's arms with a slow iris shot as they smile. Just before it closes, Anais squirts whipped cream into Gumball's mouth]
Gumball: Ahh... I was hoping you'd do that.

The Tape [2.35]

[The bedroom. Darwin is seated in front of the unseen camera]
Darwin: Hi, my name is azzaz-um... [Sighs and starts over] Hi, my name is Warwin Datterson... UGH! [Starts over] Hi, my name's Dyle Watterson, and this flim, and this fil, flim, AHH... CURSE WORD! [Starts over] Hi, my name is Darwin Watterson, and this Darwin's about... [Sighs] Uh...
Gumball: [Off-screen] Oh, come on, dude! How hard can this be?!
[Gumball is now the one seated, facing away from the camera]
Gumball: Oh, hi! [Turns and cracks his neck, his head has now turned one-hundred-eighty degrees] Augh! Mmm...
[Darwin is back in the seat]
Darwin: Okay, one, two, three. Hi, my name is Marmin Towerson, and this is a film about the thing that, when the people do the...and then, then they do that, and it's about the film where we show who it is..
Gumball: [Off-screen] Again, from the top.

[Darwin cries]

[Cut to Darwin cheering]
Darwin: YES! YES! FINALLY! NAILED IT!
[Gumball joins Darwin and they hug]
Gumball: Wait, is the light supposed to be on, when it's recording or..?
[Gumball and Darwin sigh]'"

The Sweaters [2.36]

Darwin: Ohh, short shorts.
Gumball: [Sighs] What is it now?
Mr. Kreese.: I'm Mr. Kreese. I teach over at Richwood High, and I heard you might have had some altercation with some of my students yesterday.
Gumball: Yeah, we did. They came out of nowhere, and tried to start a fight with us!
Mr. Kreese.: Well, I just wanted to say if that situation ever happens again— YOU WILL LOSE, and THEY WILL WIN! And you'll be like "UGH!" and they'll be like "AAAH!"
[Gumball sighs and slams the door on him]
Mr. Kreese.: [Goes to window] Oooh, what's the matter? You scared, little piggies!?
Gumball: Uh yeah, you're a fully grown man screaming at us, and if you continue I'm gonna call the police.
Mr. Kreese.: Just what I'd expect from a couple of cowards like you. Ooooooh! Who's the hardcore one now?!
Gumball: Uh…you, I guess?
Mr. Kreese.: That's right! [Starts taunting and making weird noises and gestures]
Gumball: Let's go out the back.
[They sneak up on Mr.Kreese at the porch, and watch him while he continues to make taunting noises, tap his head repeatedly, and point through the window. Gumball shakes his head in disappointment]
Darwin: Do you know what's the worst thing is? This guy is a teacher.
Gumball: No dude. The worst thing is that this guy's got two sweaters, and he's not wearing either of them.

Season 3

The Coach [3.03]

(The scene opens on Gumball and Darwin outside of the nurse's office as Gumball knocks on the door.)
Darwin: Are you sure this is going to work? Because I really don't want to go to gym class.
(Gumball's leg kicks him in the face.)
Gumball: My legs are trying to kick my brain for just thinking about it! But don't you worry. Today's the day the plan works!
Darwin: But it's already gone wrong so many times. Maybe we should just accept our fate and go to gym class.
(Gumball's leg kicks Darwin in the shin.)
Darwin: Ow!
Gumball: Don't say that out loud! You're making them angry! Just let me handle this.
(The Nurse answers the door.)
Nurse: (sighs) Watterson. No, I haven't lost weight. No, I haven't done something new with my hair. No, you don't have the bubonic plague. No, you can't have a second opinion on that. Therefore, no, you cannot get a note to skip gym class.
(Gumball's leg kicks his face again.)
Nurse: What was that?
Gumball: Don't worry about it.

Gumball: (muffled, via subtitles) You apologized.
Jamie: Yeah, whatever, you better shut up if you don't want Mr. and Mrs. Pain to invite you to dinner! They only serve filet-o-fist!
Gumball: [Twists his jaw back] It's fine. You can let that anger go, Jamie. You touched our hearts yesterday.
Jamie: Oh, I'll touch your heart--with my fist!
Gumball: That's...quite a vivid image, but we understand. You don't have to be a bully anymore. Coach saw what we were all too blind to see, that you're really a sweet, kind, orange...thing with, uh, a hat...or a wig or some kind of a helmet...and horns that we're proud to call our friend.
Jamie: [throws Gumball in Darwin’s mouth] I am not anyone's friend! The only friends I need are Grandma and Grandpa Fist, and they don't give candy. I'm gonna show you. I'm gonna do something so bad, it'll go down in SCHOOL HISTORY!
Gumball: We really need to work on Jamie's hugging technique.

Gumball: You don't really think Jamie will do anything bad, do you?
Darwin: Well, just because she fed Anton to the ducks... [Flashback of said moment briefly plays] Or that she chewed Teri's own body to spit it back in her face... [Flashback of said moment briefly plays] Or that she ate a little bit of Sarah and Banana Joe... [Flashback of said moment briefly plays]
Gumball: (scared) Dude, stop! I can't take any more horrible flashbacks!
Darwin: But people change. Just because she did all that doesn't mean [sees Jamie] that she's capable of climbing into the back of a teacher's car to[Becomes very startled and fearful] DO SOMETHING SO BAD THAT IT'LL GO DOWN IN SCHOOL HISTORY!

The Puppy [3.05]

Darwin: At least he passed away peacefully.
Gumball: Yeah, like a peaceful, evil raisin.
[The kids and Richard are giving the turtle a funeral]
Darwin:[Sniffles] Before we say goodbye to our beloved family pet, Evil Turtle, I think we should all say a few words to let him know how much he meant to us.
Gumball, Anais and Richard: Hmmm.
Darwin: I'll always think fondly of the way he put fear into my heart.
Gumball, Anais and Richard: Hmmm.
Anais: Every time I stare down at the scar tissue on my hand, I'll think of him.
Gumball and Darwin: Hmmm.
Richard: Only once in your lifetime, does something touch your heart in the way that... awesome store did! [Sobs in his hands]
Gumball: Dad, you gotta move on.
Anais: Gumball, do you have anything you like to add?
Gumball: Yeah, er.... I'll miss his.... you know the funny way he... the thing he... I got nothing.
Darwin: [Drops the dead turtle into the trash bag] All of this because we couldn't take care of him.
[Darwin cries over the turtle and a single drop falls on the turtle who immediately recovers and hisses at them, scaring Gumball]
Darwin: He was revived by my tear!
Gumball: IT FEEDS ON MISERY!!!
[The turtle climbs out and crosses the road away from the Wattersons, hissing and snarling furiously]
Darwin: Somebody save him, he could get hurt!
[The Turtle moves into the path of a speeding car in which the car crashes into pieces and the turtle was unharmed and unfazed by the impact]
Anais: Forget saving the turtle, we need a plan to save the neighborhood.

(At a swamp, Gumball is tied to a tree with tape---in his underwear.)

Gumball: Why am I the bait?
Darwin: (comes out of a bush) Because you're the one the turtle loves biting the most!
Gumball: Okay, but why am I not allowed to wear clothes?
Darwin: Because he could choke on them.
(Darwin pops out of his hiding spot and decorates Gumball's head with leaves.)
Gumball: What was that for?
Darwin: Presentation. It's important.
Gumball: What??
Anais: Shh! Just remember to let it get as close as possible to give me a chance to catch it!
Darwin: And just so you know, don't even hurt him, okay? He's only a small little guy, and there's three of u--
(Darwin suddenly falls as he is heard gasping.)
Gumball: Darwin? You okay, buddy?
(Gumball nervously checks his environment as looks around. He then hears splashing water.)
Gumball: Darwin? Is that you?
(A pair of malicious eyes poke out of the swamp. Gumball gapes before the turtle rushes out to him while hissing, scaring Gumball and forcing him to free himself!)
Gumball: I CAN'T FIND THE EDGE!!!
(The evil turtle closes in, but Gumball manages to free himself, though losing his fur from the tape, and runs away, with the turtle in pursuit.)
Anais: Wait, what about the bowl?!
Gumball: WHAT ABOUT MY BUTT?!?!?

(Before the monster turtle could come any closer, Anais traps it in the bowl.)

Anais: Well, I guess there's no getting rid of it. We'll have to keep it for as long as it lives.
Nicole: How long do they live?
Anais: 130 years.

The Name [3.07]

Gumball: (Gumball's sweat pours out and Gumball's organs are crying.) I'm weak.

Nicole: (to Gumball) Your real name is Zach.

Red Construction Man: (to Gumball as Zach) Hey, kid, get in line like everyone else!
Crocodile Woman: (to Gumball as Zach/Darwin) You've got 3 seconds to move or I'll bingo-wing you.
Red Construction Man: (to Gumball as Zach/Darwin): Get back in the line.
Darwin: (to Gumball as Zach) aah, dude, you can say sorry to these people before they get heavy items at the bottom of the car?!

Darwin: (to Gumball as Zach) NO, WAIT, WHERE ARE YOU GOING?!

Darwin: (to Gumball as Zach) No wait!
Crocodile Woman: (to Gumball as Zach/Darwin) I warned you.

The Gripes [3.09]

Alan: (to the crowd) THESE CHILDREN NEED HEEEEELP!

Banana Bob Grunting: THEY LIED TO UUUUUUS!

Gumball: we (Gumball/Darwin) DIDN'T LIE! (to Darwin) We're mega poor, right, Darwin?!
Banana Bob: (to Gumball/Darwin) PROVE IIIIIIT!

Gumball: EVERYBODY, LISTEN, I think we all learned a very important lesson today and this lesson is...don't complain, be happy with what you got! no, that's.... uh, quite right?! uh, be careful of what you say! nah, no, that's not it either uh, don't jump to conclusions, no, no, don't try to be something you're... not... 'cause uh,... be yourselves?! I don't know, man... maybe the lesson is sometimes, some people do stuffy, things happen and it kind of goes nowhere, anyway, thanks for the check bye!

The Vacation [3.10]

The Law [3.15]

Gumball: I mean, why not drive with your eyes closed, and your hands in the air too?!
Donut Cop: Ah, great idea! [Drives with eyes closed and hands in air]
[Gumball then screams]
Donut Cop: Whoohoo!
[He drives on the wrong lane, and barely hits other cars and people going the opposite direction]
Darwin: [Panicked] No! NO! He was trying to use reverse psychology!
Donut Cop: Did someone say reverse?!
[The sheriff reverses the car, and drives backwards. The car flies off a speed bump, and a speed camera takes a snapshot of the car's bottom. They continue driving, no longer reversed. Gumball takes his paws with claws stuck on the dashboard off it]
Gumball: Please, I'm begging you. Someone's going to get hurt unless you stop breaking the law!
Donut Cop: Don't worry kid, nothing can happen. I AM THE LAW! [Laughs hysterically]
[He speeds up the car. Then spotting a baby carriage and the Crocodile Woman in the middle of the road, he steps on the brakes and screeches to a halt. The car stops in time, but bumps the carriage. This sends a piece of trash flying from the baby stroller]
Gumball: Oh, thank gosh it's the old stroller-full-of-trash trick.
[The piece of trash hits a live baby in another stroller from a distance, making it cry]

The Mothers [3.17]

Banana Joe: Your mom's aren't the superest, mine is! It's written right here.
Gumball: Dude. Just because you wrote something, doesn't mean it's true.
Darwin: What is it anyway?
Banana Joe: What do you mean, "What is it?" It's a banana!
[He shows his card. On it is "Superest mom" with a sad clown's face. No one says anything, and he puts his arm down]
Gumball: Look, I don't want to break anyone's heart here, but at the max, your mom could be the superest in your neighborhood.
Darwin: But sometimes Mrs. Mom drives down their street.
Gumball: Oh, yeah, right. Superest mom in your house then, tops.

The Procrastinators [3.19]


(The episode opens on a close-up of Gumball and Darwin)

Darwin: Wait, what?
Nicole: You are procrastinators.
Darwin: What does that mean?
Gumball: "Procrastinator". Derived from the Mexican word, Procratalamación, which means "midnight snack", and the Viking word, astenator, which means "puckered cheeks". It describes a person sitting on a sandwich in the dark.
[Darwin sends a confused face at Gumball]
Gumball: Of course I don't know, dude. You know how I use a dictionary...
[A flashback shows a sleeping Richard and Gumball emerging behind the couch with a dictionary. He slams it shut, creating a loud boom that scares Richard, causing his heart to literally burst out of his chest. Gumball disgustedly escapes the scene.]
Anais: A procrastinator is someone who always avoids their responsibilities by doing something else instead.
Gumball: (laughs) That's ridiculous.
Nicole: Gumball, you're such a procrastinator that you were four years old when you finished your first sentence. Even then, it was "I'll do it tomorrow."

The Shell [3.20]


Gumball: What the what? Y-you look… you look—
Penny​​​: What? Do I look bad? [She shape-shifts into a gremlin]
Gumball: No! You look, uh—
Penny​​​: [Raspy voice] I look disgusting, don't I?!
Gumball: No, Penny, I think you look—
Penny​​​: Don't look at me! [Deep voice] I'M A MONSTER!
[Penny shape-shifts into an amorphous fist, breaks through the wall of Gumball's room, and flies away, now in the form of a gargoyle]
Gumball: No, Penny, wait! You look… extraordinary.
Richard: NO! It's a tragic misunderstanding that could have been really easily avoided if he just finished his sentence in time!
'[Nicole slowly opens the door and the rest of the Wattersons rush into Gumball's room]
[Gumball climbs down the ladder, going after Penny]
Gumball: Penny, please wait!
Nicole: Gumball!

Patrick: What the…? You came out of your shell.
Gumball: [Laughs nervously] I know, she looks fantastic, right?
Patrick: What have you done? You've turned her into a freak.
Gumball: A freak…ishly beautiful young lady. [Laughs nervously]
Patrick: She looks like a pig-
Gumball: -ture of beauty. Ha ha, absolutely!
Patrick: You turned my daughter into a monster!
Gumball: -truck! Of... prettiness?
[Penny shrieks as she transforms into a dragon]
Penny​​​: [Deep voice] Gumball, please tell my father that the monster's gone to live in the forest, with all the other beasts! [Flies away]
[Gumball turns to Patrick, with an angry expression on his face]
Patrick: What?
Gumball: [Mockingly imitates Patrick] Ohh, I wonder why my daughter is upset after I called her a freaky pig monster!
[Gumball hops on the hood of Patrick's car]
Gumball: NOW, WITH ALL DUE RESPECT, I'M GONNA HAVE TO ASK YOU TO SHUT UP! Think about what you've done! Do you realize you were wrong?! [Patrick nods] Good! But don't beat yourself up about it, parenting is hard! Now pop the hood!
[Patrick pops the hood of his car, launching Gumball up into the sky, and onto Penny]
Gumball: I'm not letting you leave!

Penny​: Gumball, no! You'll get hurt! Gumball: Ah! Look out! AAH!

[A plane approaches them. They barely dodge it]

Gumball: Penny! Go up go up GO UP! Penny​: You're too heavy! Gumball: Aww, man!

The Bros [3.22]

Gumball: What's your best dance move?
[Darwin does his best dance move, sliding from side to side in his seat]
Darwin: What's yours?
Gumball: Cossack dance, but there's a problem with it.
Darwin: What?
[Gumball gets off of his seat, and dances. He repeatedly kicks himself in the face as he does so]
Gumball: My torso's too short.
[They both laugh. Gumball goes back to his seat]

Darwin: BACK OFF, PENNY FITZGERALD!! HE'S MY BROTHER FROM ANOTHER MOTHER!!!

The Mirror [3.23]

Gumball: (sighs) Come on, just say it.
Darwin: What?
Gumball: Well, I lost all my money, all my friends, and my girlfriend, so you were right to take that curse seriously. Come on, just say "I told you so."
Darwin: I don't know what you take me for, but I get no pleasure out of this. (reaching the house) Let's just hope our family is still there.
[Gumball slowly opens the door]
Gumball: (nervously) Hello? Mom? Dad?
Darwin: (closes door) Told you so.
Gumball: (slapping Darwin) STOP, YOU'RE BEING HYSTERICAL!!!
[Darwin slaps him back. Gumball also slaps back. They both keep slapping each other quickly before stopping]
Gumball: Okay, let's stop. This isn't very constructive.
Darwin: Exactly! We're doing this my way now. We're getting help--magical help.

The Man [3.24]


Granny Jojo: Enough chitchat. Help me up! I don't wanna break a leg before my hot date.
[The kids try to lift her out, but she is surprisingly heavy]
Gumball: What the weight?! How can someone so small be so heavy?
Granny Jojo: Well, I have two metal hips, one orthopedic shoe, six gold teeth, a plate in my head and an industrial-strength pacemaker. I've got so much metal in me, I'm legally classified as a motor vehicle. Anyway, where's the rope?
[The kids look back to see the rope gone.]
Gumball: (to Anais) Didn't I tell you to tie the end to something?
Anais: (to Darwin) Didn't I tell you to tie the end to something??
Darwin: (to no one) Didn't I tell you to--
Gumball: Oh, wait. Sorry. My bad. I didn't tell anyone to tie it.
Darwin: It's okay.
Granny Jojo: (sighs) We need another plan.

The Pizza [3.25]

Gumball: Uh, what do you want?!

(A microphone goes off.)

Mr. Small: (through intercom) This is our territory, and YOU are now our prey...
Gumball: What?! are you planning to eat us?!

(Mr. Small climbs down and approaches the Wattersons.)

Mr. Small: Yes. I ran out of tofu and soy milk. Say, you guys aren't on any antibiotics, are you? If I have to eat meat, I want it to be organic.
Gumball: Are you serious?!
Mr. Small: I'm sorry, but it's survival of the fittest.
Nicole: Good! Then you won't mind me doing this.

(Nicole grabs Mr. Small and throws him. The other dystopians are dealt with in short order as Nicole easily beats them.)

Alan: (to Nicole) HEY!

(Nicole turns toward Alan. She walks toward him before blowing an effortless breath of air, instantly popping him.)

Gumball, Darwin, Anais, Nicole and Richard: YEAAAAAAAAAH!

Larry: Why are you guys here? And why are you dressed like that?
Gumball: Because, it's the apocalypse, and because… well, it-it's the apocalypse!
Anais: Society collapsed as soon as you resigned!
Larry: But that was only twenty minutes ago.

The Butterfly [3.27]

Ms. Simian: Okay. Break time's over. I can't be bothered to take attendance. So if you're not here, please raise your hand now.
[Nothing happens]
Ms. Simian: Good. [Sees empty jar; shouts angrily] WHERE'S THE BUTTERFLY?!
Darwin: Miss Simian, we did the only decent thing and set it free.
Ms. Simian: You fools! You've unleashed the sheer destructive power of a butterfly on the world! [Takes cover] Brace, duck, and cover!
Gumball: Come on, Miss Simian. Do you really think a little butterfly could—oh, here he is now. Coming back to say hello.
[The butterfly lands on his hand]
Gumball: [Sighs] He's so cute. How can anyone believe that something so tiny can destroy a whole town?

The Saint [3.29]

Alan​​​​: AAH! Can you please stop making that noise?!
Gumball: What?
Alan​​​​: Dragging your feet! It's grating!
Gumball: Oh, but I don't understand. You mean this? [Squeaks floor]
Alan​​​​: [Yells] STOP IT, YOU JERK!
Gumball: YES! Ha ha! I finally dragged you down to my level! I knew you could be broken! Oh, I feel so much better about myself. I gotta go tell Darwin!
[Gumball runs off, and Alan screams in rage. Then Alan calms down, smiles, and makes his face again]
Alan​​​​: [Whispering] Whatever makes you happy, my friend.

The Safety [3.32]

Video Narrator: Watch Out, Little Teddy.
[Then a teddy bear is seen cooking]
Video Narrator: Little Teddy is very excited, because it's cookie time. But, watch out, Little Teddy…
[Little Teddy burns his hands while attempting to bring out some cookies from an oven]
Little Teddy: Ow! Ow!
Video Narrator: BE CAREFUL AROUND OVENS!
[The video switches to Little Teddy looking out from a window, and to a tree with a bird]
Video Narrator: Little Teddy has seen a bird. [Little Teddy waves as narrator speaks] Hello little bird!
Bird: Hello!
Video Narrator: But, watch out, Little Teddy...
[Little Teddy falls out of the window, and hits the ground. The bird perches on Little Teddy's head and pecks his nose]
Video Narrator: BE CAREFUL AROUND WINDOWS!
[Little Teddy is seen chasing a butterfly in a field]
Video Narrator: Little Teddy is having fun in the backyard, with a butterfly. Butterflies are pretty. But, watch out, Little Teddy….
[After running a long distance, Little Teddy knocks himself over with a rake]
Video Narrator: BE CAREFUL AROUND GARDEN TOOLS!
[The video transitions to Little Teddy walking to an old woman about to cross a road]
Video Narrator: Little Teddy is helping a senior citizen. That's kind of you, Teddy. It's nice to be nice.
[Little Teddy and the old woman start crossing the road]
Video Narrator: But, watch out, Little Teddy...
[Little Teddy puts his arm around the old woman's shoulder, which angers her. The old woman screams, and beats his head with a crowbar until a bump rises from his head]
Video Narrator: BE CAREFUL AROUND STRANGERS!
[As the old woman leaves, Little Teddy is hit by a speeding car]
Video Narrator: AND CARS!
[The scene flips over, and transitions to Little Teddy dancing inside a circle of singing children]
Children: [Singing] If you're going on adventures, or having lots of fun. Remember to be frightened, being safe is number one.
Little Teddy: [Waving] Remember, kids: please take care, 'cause danger's lurking— [Little Teddy, along with the video becomes eerily distorted and slowed] everywhere.
[The camera zooms out from a TV in Miss Simian's classroom. Beside it, Mr. Small is screaming, frightened by the video. Gumball, Darwin, Sarah, Leslie, Masami, Molly, and Tobias, who were watching the video, are frozen with horrified expressions on their faces]
Mister Small​​​​​: Okay. Everyone, take the rest of the day off. I'm just gonna—

The Society [3.33]

(Prinicpal Brown gives Gumball detention (as Gumball's punishment) for accidentally doing wrong things)

Banana Joe: (storms away from Gumball)

Idaho: (storms off)

The Countdown [3.35]

[Darwin draws a watch onto his wrist. Seeing the time, he gasps before rushing to the room]
Darwin: Wake up! We're gonna be late for school!
Gumball: (sighs) I'll get up when the alarm goes off.
Darwin: But you've already pressed the snooze button!
Gumball: That was five minutes ago.
Darwin: That was an hour ago! Snooze time goes faster than regular time.
Gumball: (sighs) I just found the perfect position.
[Darwin pulls the cover off, revealing Gumball in a potentially bone-breaking position]
Darwin: Dude, it looks like you fell from the seventh floor.
Gumball: Come on, just another minute.
Darwin: [carrying Gumball] No, we're already late! See?
[Outside, the bus drives away, causing the boys to panic]

(Gumball and Darwin return to school.)

Gumball: Okay, all we need to do is set the clock back to "0", and everything will be fine. Spin it!
[Darwin spins the clock, sending the boys through time. They stop in a dystopian future]
Gumball: Uh, dude, I think you spun it too far...
[An explosion occurs]
Gumball: Let's go back a little.
[Gumball spins the clock again, this time sending them to space--the exact moment it was created via the Big Bang]
Gumball: (silently, via subtitles): [That was a big bang!] (To Darwin) [Too far back?]
[Darwin nods. Gumball spins the clock again.]

The Downer [3.37]

Gumball: If you're all hiding so I'd get up, I would like to point out that technically I haven't left my bed, so you don't win! Fine! [Throws his mattress off his back] If everyone is really gone, then no one would mind if I did this.
[Gumball has a weird looking face and knocks over a lamp, the lamp hits the TV, that knocks over and hits a shelf, stuff on the top of the shelf like a vase, falls and then a vase bounces back up and hits the shelf back to where it was, the shelf knocks the TV back where it was, then the TV hits the lamp then hits Gumball, and then he falls]
Gumball: [Looks around, rubbing his cheek] Aaaaaa- it hurts, [Making weird movements] Ahhhh- I think I fractured my nose and sprained an ear or something. Aa! I think I need very expensive medical help, unless someone gave me a magic kiss? [Thinks and extends his mouth to his cheek, giving himself a kiss] What is going on here? [Gasp] I made a terrible wish [Starts to tear up] and now my whole family have disappeared! [Grouchy face] Good.

The Triangle [3.39]

Prinicpal Brown: (throws Gumball out of the locker room and on the ground.)

Gumball: (pushes Leslie for inserting gum in and sabotaging Darwin's whistle) NOOO! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!
Leslie: THE SOLO IS MINE, NOT DARWIN'S! HE STOLE MY SPOTLIGHT, AND FLOWERS NEED LIGHT TO GROW!
Gumball: (pushes Leslie) Dude, you're a flower boy who plays a flute in a school band. You don't want this to get violent!
Leslie: You were talking to someone who was a dancer since the year he was born in! (slaps Gumball and punches and kicks Gumball to give him a black eye)
Gumball: What I meant (takes the Archie head off) (Gumball's black eye and swollen face are shown.) was violence is never the answer, dude. You're supposed to be happy for your friend's success. This isn't about Darwin being good at something, it's about you refusing to make the effort to better yourself, and you know what the definition of that kind of person is?
Leslie: You!
Gumball: Exactly.
Leslie: No, I don't want that to happen!
Gumball: So, why don't we just enjoy the success of our friend even if it means that we get left behind?
Leslie: You're right!
Gumball: Quick, he's about to play the solo!

(Outside, all eyes turn to Darwin as a drumroll plays over...and over...and over to signal his cue. Under stage fright, he plays his whistle, but it comes out more shaky and lacking in resonance, causing the crowd to boo him.)

Man: He's terrible!

(However, Gumball and Leslie righteously nod to congratulate their friend.)

The Money [3.40]

Gumball: Rocky! We need to get to the mall so we can sell out and make a load of cash!
Rocky: Oh, sure. No probs- [Starts to glitch out before he can finish his sentence]
[The bus starts moving but the glitching begins to infect the bus and everything it comes in contact with. The Wattersons scream as the bus glitches out of control but their screams are temporarily switched to lovely-sounding tweeting birds as the sound begins to cut in and out as well. The bus then glitches into the air before falling back down smoothly, phasing through the ground. The bus then hits Doughnut Sheriff and Mr. Robinson who were glitched as well]
Donut Cop: Arrrgh!!!
Gaylord: ROAD HOoOoGGS!!!
[The bus continues to glitch and the Wattersons continue to scream as the bus begins to break down. The sound begins to drop in quality as well]
Gumball: We need to get out of here!
[The family jumps out of the bus as it continues to disintergrate to nothing. The family then runs towards the mall]
Nicole: We got to sign that contract before there is nothing left of Elmore!
[The environment then immediately switches from a barely 3D environment to a storyboard as the Wattersons are running through the Mall Parking lot]
Richard: [Muffled] We're... almost... there!
Gumball: [Muffled] Are you sure? Cos' it doesn't look like we're moving.
[The panels then begin to speed up as the Wattersons are apparently moving faster than before]
Darwin: [Muffled] AAARGH! 'Too faaast!!!
Gumball, Darwin, Anais, Nicole and Richard: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOAH!!!
[Their speed boosts up, which allows them to break through the storyboard panel borders and tear through the entrance of the mall. After they crash through the door, the environment is reduced to a hand-drawn background and the Wattersons become sticky notes]
Gumball: [Muffled] Where's Joyful Burger?!
Nicole: [Muffled] It's that way! [Points in a direction]
Anais: [Muffled] Err... it's over there. [Sticks her thumb in the opposite direction]
[Nicole's arm is suddenly erased]
Nicole: AAAAAAAHHH!!!! [Only for it to be drawn back pointing in the right direction] Oh. I meant that way.
[The Wattersons run into Joyful Burger, now crude post-it note drawings]
Nicole: We'll do the commercial!
Larry: [In a computer-generated voice with Australian accent] Then hurry up before it's too late!
[The Wattersons, except Gumball, all sign the contract, causing their animation and the environment to revert back to normal, while Gumball remains a sticky note]
Nicole: Quick, Gumball!
Richard: Come on, sign it!
[The camera cuts to Gumball, still a post-it note drawing. He grabs the pencil on the contract]
Gumball: [Puts down pencil] Wait. Are we really going to become clichés of ourselves just to sell a few burgers? Isn't there a way to survive in this world without selling out? Not everything has a price! Some things are more precious than money! Like dignity! Freedom! Love! Sorry, Larry, but you could have all the money in the world and you still couldn't afford the Wattersons!

Season 4

The Return [4.01]

Richard: WHAT?!
Larry: I said, the ball pit had to go. It wasn't safe. All those kids sinking, getting lost, the paper work! In the end, we did the only responsible thing---sold it to a country with less child safety laws.
Richard: You mean... I exported my kids?
Larry: Well, technically, he's exporting them.

The Sale [4.08]

(The episode opens on Gumball and Darwin, falling through the floor of the house into their Pit of Despair. In reality, they're actually laying on the floor, quietly agonizing during their "descent")

Anais: Come on, guys. Mr. Robinson selling his house is not the end of the world.
Nicole: Maybe we'll get some pleasant neighbors this time.
(Upon hearing this, the boys' faces scowl as they rewind out of the pit with demonic-looking expressions.)
Darwin: (deep, demonic voice) TAKE IT BACK!!!!!
Gumball: (deep, demonic voice) NO ONE COULD EVER REPLACE THE MIRACLE THAT IS GAYLORD ROBINSON! TAKE IT BACK!!!
Nicole: Okay, okay, okay! I take it back!
Darwin: DO IT PROPERLY! TAKE YOUR WORDS BACK!!!
(Nicole complies as she says her forsaken statement backwards to take it back. Immediately, the boys' faces return to normal.)
Gumball: (normal voice) Thank you.

The Comic [4.13]


(The episode opens with Gumball walking through school, when the egg nerds turn the corner and start inexplicably screaming. Gumball screams with them, briefly looking back to see who they were screaming at before the two run over and rip off his sweater.)

Egg Nerd #1: See, I told you it wasn't his costume. It's part of his molecular structure, as shown in Issue 27.
Gumball: What the WHATTING WHAT?!
Molly: Save me, like you saved the President in Issue 19!
(Molly jumps for Gumball to catch her. As expected, his weak body splats into the wall upon her crushing him.)
Molly; Of course! If you did save me, you'd reveal your secret identity. Your secret's safe with me, Laserheart.
(Molly kisses Gumball before moving on, leaving his body to fall to the floor. Later, Gumball keeps strolling, watching out for anything else until--)
Banana Joe: Hey, Gumball! What a plaser to see you.
Gumball: What?
Banana Joe: I'd love to laser 'round chatting, but I gotta get to he-art class. (brows Gumball gleefully while the receiver shrugs in confusion.) See you laser...heart. (Gleefully giggles)
(Then, the students and faculty of Elmore Junior High starts humming a superhero theme song reminiscent of Superman's as Gumball panickedly runs through the hall and around the corner, where Darwin and Sarah are standing by.)

Gumball: Dude! Who the derp is Laserheart?!
Sarah: You are! You're a superhero, whose special power is his optimistic heart!
Darwin: You inflict justice and bad dialogue on the villains of Elmore. You're anatomically incorrect, and this is your costume.
(Darwin shows the comic's cover, showing an obviously unrealistically buff version of Gumball wearing a costume showing his abs, bare legs, and arms.)
Gumball: But, that's...that's--
Darwin: Extremely revealing? Profoundly disturbing? Medically impossible?
Gumball: That's...AWESOME!

(A saddened Gumball and Darwin return home.)

Darwin: Should we call the police?
Gumball: (sighs) And tell them what? That we spent all day dressed up as eastern European pop stars and got mugged for $7 by a shadow?

The Uploads [4.15]

The Hug [4.17]

Darwin: So what are you gonna do?
Gumball: I'm gonna man up, and put an end to this!
Darwin: You're just gonna make yourself so unlikable that he has to take responsibility for the end of the friendship, aren't you?
[Gumball is about to interrupt]
Darwin: But first you're gonna deny it.

The Wicked [4.18]

Darwin: [Picks it up] Here! A photo album!
[Darwin sets it down and opens it for them both to see. The first photo shows a much younger Margaret Robinson sitting in a boat on a lake, smiling wickedly]
Darwin: She looks happy there.

Gumball: Her brother doesn't. [In the same photo, next to the boat, Margaret’s helpless brother is seen drowning. Slightly concerned, Darwin flips to the next page. The next photo is of Margaret’s first day at Elmore Junior High]

Darwin: Look, first day of school!

Gumball: Yeah, probably the last for a few others.

[Margaret gazes happily at the camera as the school building burns behind her. A fire crew is seen attempting to stop the blaze. Another page is flipped. The next photo shows Margaret as a child in the living room of her home at Christmas time]
Darwin: Christmas!
[Darwin gasps as he sees Margaret fanning the hearth fire to burn Santa as he climbs down the chimney]
Darwin: Santa... [Distraught voice, closes the book] I don't wanna see any more!
Gumball: [Reopens the book] Well, wait a minute. What about the baby pictures? They gotta be cute.
[The photo is of a human hand finishing the stitching of the infant Margaret]
Gumball: Aw...
[Gumball flips to the next page. The photo shows Margaret as a toddler, ripping off a teddy bear’s head]
Gumball: Oh! I guess she was just born that way, dude.
[Mr. Robinson, who stands in the shadows behind them, begins to speak as he approaches them. Startled by his voice, Gumball and Darwin quickly turn to see him]
Gaylord: Margaret is and will always be a mystery. Nothing happened in her life to justify the way she is. Some people aren't looking for anything logical; they can't be bought, reasoned, or negotiated with. Sometimes, man just wants to watch the world burn.
Gumball: Uh...are you saying Mrs. Robinson's a man?
Gaylord: [Shocked] What? No!
Gumball: [Quietly] Wait, y-you said "man", Mr.- [Trails off]
Gaylord: [Puts his hands on his hips and stomps toward them in frustration] I meant "man" as in "mankind!"
Darwin: But, she isn't kind.
Gaylord: No, I-I-I [Defeated] Ah, just get out of here.

The Traitor [4.19]

Gumball: [opens hospital door and says to Alan] YOU BUT GUSTED!

[Darwin steps in front of Alan in determination, tears off his surgical mask, and begins to blow in air to re-inflate the balloon; at that moment a band-aid doctor throws open the operating room door]
Doctor: What's going on he–
[He sees Darwin, gasps and backs away. The door swings closed]
Darwin: Uh– I think the anesthetic's worn off!
Gumball: How can you tell?
Alan: MY INSIDES ARE POURING OUT!!!
Darwin: What do we do!?
[Darwin and Alan are both screaming; Gumball, unamused, licks a finger and pokes it into the balloon opening, like a plug]
Gumball: ..Okay, now look for his flatulum.
[Darwin takes a step and slips on an invisible organ]
Darwin: AAH! Found it...
Gumball: [Determined] Then scrape it off your shoe and prepare for surgery!
[The scene cuts to Gumball's face as he is immensely concentrated on the operation he's doing. Darwin presses a towel on Gumball's forehead to remove the sweat]
Gumball: Scalpel... [Darwin hands it over] Forceps... [Darwin hands it over] Mayonnaise... [Darwin hands over a jar of mayo; a moment later Gumball picks up the sandwich he just made] There you go!
[Darwin bites it with delight]
Darwin: Mmm, that's really good!

The Misunderstandings [4.32]

[Darwin's hilarious moment of all time!]
[Gumball runs to the door and puts on his pants and sweater quickly]
Darwin: [Runs up to Gumball] Gumball, look. I learned how to wiggle my ears. Check it out! [Stands still, squinting] Is it happening? Are they wiggling?
[Gumball walks out the door]
Darwin: Wha-- Wait a second! I jus- I just had it! You gotta see!
Gumball: Uh, yeah. [Describes something with his hands]
Darwin: What do you mean you wanna buy a new pair of fruit bikinis but you're not sure if the milk is off?
Gumball: What?
Darwin: That's what you just described with your hands.
Gumball: Ok. First, you don't have ears. And secondly, this is what people do when they wanna get out of a conversation without being mean.
Darwin: Well I think it's a little bit confusing.
Gumball: How is this remotely confusing? [Repeating his earlier gestures] "I'm late, I have to go, I have to hurry, I might call you but I definitely won't."

The Blame [4.34]

Billy: [Gasps] What is this dazzling juxtaposition of sound and image?
Darwin: It's a video game.
Billy: So these are the video games of which Mother warned me! How do they function?
Gumball: See this dude with the muscles of a bodybuilder and the haircut of a Korean pop star? That's me. And I have to blast these monsters over here to save... stuff? [Leaves his seat] Here, try it!
Billy: But is it not dangerous? Mother always says that video games can make one lose contact with reality. That they encourage loose behavior and violent tendencies. Much like rock and roll music, long hair, and vaccinations.
Darwin: Um, no? They're just fun.
Billy: Well, I suppose there's no harm in trying it once. [Chuckles] In the name of science, of course! [Sits down and starts playing] [Screaming] WHOO! THIS IS AMAZING!!
[The camera zooms into Billy's eyes, transitioning to various video game scenes. Billy can be heard screaming and laughing off-screen]
Billy: THE FUN! IT'S TOO MUCH! TOO MUCH! I CAN'T TAKE IT!!!
[When the sequence stops he falls to the ground drooling rainbows]
Darwin: What was that all about?
Gumball: He didn't even make it past the loading screen!

The Slap [4.35]

[The scene opens on Gumball taking his finger out of Darwin's mouth]
Darwin: No, I don't think USBing will replace a high-five.
Gumball: Maybe it's the name. What about "digit dogging"?
Darwin: I don't think the name's a problem. Although, admittedly, that name would be a problem.

Season 5

The Rerun [5.01]

Gumball: Trust me, Darwin. Rob is gonna destroy us all. I've seen the future!
Darwin: Okay, prove it.
Gumball: Right. Pick a game from the bargain bin.
[Darwin takes a game and Gumball starts talking without even looking at the game]
Gumball: Extreme Tractor Race. Review says: "Here's a cheat code: go left, forward, forward, right, forward, forward, back to the store where you bought it, and ask for a refund."
Darwin: [Gasps] You really can tell the future!
Gumball: Yes! And things are about to get–
Darwin: No! Whatever you say could alter the future in some terrible way!
Gumball: Yeah, but whatever you do in the present does that anyway. Look, you just need to know that–
Darwin: [Puts his hands over his gills] Stop! I refuse to know!
Gumball: Dude, you don't have ears, you're just covering your gills. You won't hear the future, but you won't live to see it either if you can't breathe.

The Guy [5.02]

[Anais nervously walks up to the new kid]
Anais: (yelling) HI! I'M ANAIS!!!
Josh: (yelling) HI, I'M JOSH! DO YOU WANT TO BE FRIENDS?!
Anais: YES! DO YOU MIND IF I DO A LITTLE HAPPY DANCE?!
Josh: OF COURSE NOT! MIND IF I JOIN YOU?!
[Anais and Josh dance for a few seconds]
Josh: SEE YOU FOR LUNCH!
Anais: OKAY!!!!

The Vision [5.04]

(The episode opens in the school shower, where Gumball and Darwin finish cleaning themselves.)

Gumball: Hey, Darwin. I think I'm getting leaner. I feel like another ab is coming. Do you see anything?
[Gumball flexes his chest, but there is obviously nothing.]
Darwin: No, but your bummy looks pretty ripped.
Gumball: [confused] My what, now?
Darwin: Bummy. How your butt turns into your tummy!
Gumball: Oh! I call it my "gutootie". Looks pretty rad when I suck it in.

(Gumball and Darwin slyly look at Alan's photos.)

Gumball: Oh. This one is called "Total Serenity".

(The photo shows Alan and Carmen on a camping trip, but in the distance, a man is shown naked and censoring himself behind a bush.)

Gumball: (snickering) Or "Total Nudity".
Gumball: This one is called "A Beautiful Spot"...

(The next photo shows a beach day, but in the distance, a dog is shown attempting to poop.)

Darwin: ...to relieve yourself!

(The boys laugh until they come upon a document.)

Gumball: Hey, what's this? (clicks document) "My vision, by Alan Keane. A manifesto on how I can gain the power I need to purge Elmore Junior High of its greatest problem"?
Gumball and Darwin: WHAT!?!
Gumball: Is this for real?
Darwin: You better read it.
Gumball: "To become school president, I might need to work a little on my appearance. (shifts to Alan's voice) The more serious a leader looks, the more seriously he will be taken.
Alan: The next step is to alter my voice, (lowers to a deep and booming voice) lowering it to give it a little more gravitas--Maybe not that low--, (shifts to a Southern accent) and then just a hint of an accent, for...approachability.

The Code [5.07]

Gumball: Hm. It's not touch-sensitive and it looks like a double keyboard with the letters all messed up.

The Test [5.08]

(The episode opens in the school library.)

Gumball: The internet--a place of infinite knowledge, only a click away. A place to transform the world and unite every being...and this is what they do with it. (Gestures to a photo collage of llamas) "26 pictures of llamas that basically sum up the human condition"?
Sarah: (giggling) But look at that one having a bad hair day!

(Sarah moves to a llama with an afro-like hairdo and a toothy smile.)

Gumball: Sarah, this is just a llama-based ploy to ram as much advertising into your face as possible.
Sarah: But it's good advertising. Look at this: "Doctors hate him. Learn his five-step trick for rock-hard abs."
Gumball: (looking at the ad) Sarah, that's a picture of a rock.

The Loophole [5.10]

(The episode opens outside Ms. Simian's classroom, where the students sulk out.)

Gumball: I just don't get the concept. Shouldn't we have covered everything during the school day? Homework is like going to the bathroom then coming back with a doggy bag.
Ms. Simian: Fill out a form and put it in the suggestion box.
(Ms. Simian points to a box nearby.)
Gumball: Oh, you must think I'm too lazy to go through the administrative motions. Well, just watch me.
(Gumball writes a suggestion and throws it in the box, but the bottom is revealed to be hollowed out, sending the paper headfirst into a shredder. Gumball then sends a judgmental stare at Ms. Simian, who responds with a devious smile.)
Gumball: (sighs) Where do I file a complaint about the suggestion box?
Ms. Simian: Please post it in the complaint box.
Gumball: And where's that?
(The complaint box is revealed to be in the desert, where some who have braved the journey had died before posting their complaint.)

The Potato [5.12]

(As Darwin walks toward Mr. Small, something catches his eye.)

Darwin: What's that on your desk?
Mr. Small: Nothing! Go back to the part where you were saying what a great duo therapist I am.
Darwin: I never said that. (Walks to the desk and reveals the hidden object) Is that a string of sausages? And there are steaks hidden under here!

(Gumball and Sarah gasp at this atrocity!)

Mr. Small: Wait! It's not what this looks like! I've been hiding meat around my desk because I CAN'T STOP EATING IT!
Gumball: That's exactly what it looks like.
Darwin: YOU'RE A TOTAL FAKE! (tearing up) That's it!

(Darwin picks up a raw potato.)

Gumball and Sarah: NO!
Darwin: (crying) I'm sorry, but this is who I am!

(Darwin eats the potato, but, unexpectedly, nothing happens.)

Darwin: Huh. I don't feel any different. Do I look okay?

(Gumball, Sarah, and Mr. Small's head are all replaced by potatoes with faces.)

Gumball: Potato.
Mr. Small: Potato.
Sarah: Potato, potato.

(The scene fades to a dark background as the potato heads vocalize.)

Potato Heads: (singing) Potaaaato! Potaaaato!
Potato #4:
Hello, Darwin, nice to see you
Glad to have you back with us
We have things we need to tell you,
If it isn't too much fuss.
We really can't forgive you when you cut us into pieces
WE WISH YOU HADN'T EATEN ALL OUR NEPHEWS AND OUR NIECES!
Mashed and baked and fried and roasted...
Sautéed, boiled, grilled and toasted
Peeled off all our skin, gouged out all our eyes,
Diced us into wedges and you sliced us into fries!
We are glad we came to see you
One more thing we must discuss
The final thing we need to say is---
PLEASE, WILL YOU STOP EATING US?!!

The Menu [5.27]

Gumball: That wasn't even a pun! That's just what that word is!

(Richard slams down the map on the counter. His flab wiggles around for a few moments before stopping.)
Larry: Sir, you've earned this. I give you...the M'Guffin!
(Richard gasps as the box opens to reveal a heavenly burger.)
Richard: Look at it! IT'S LIKE IT'S MADE OF LIGHT!
Gumball: Nah, that's a regular burger--just grosser than usual.

The Uncle [5.28]

(The scene shifts to the school in music video-esque graphics.)

Gumball: (singing)
I wanna say you're a real good guy,
But we both know that would be a lie
It's been a nightmare being your friend,
So it's time for this charade to end
I can't saaaaaay goodbyyyye
'Cause you might grind me down into meat pie
I'll tell the school that you've got avian flu
So it'll be their job to get rid of you
I hope they put you into quarantine
Or lock you up until you turn eighteen
So maybe then I'll never have to fear
That you might suddenly bite off my ear
Please don't bite off my ear!
I can't say...goodbyyye
My face would be too mangled to identify
If I could get your house repossessed
You'd be forced to relocate to your gran's in the Northwest
I could get you arrested for stealing a car
I could get you a job as a miner
I could ship you in a crate to Qatar
Or sell you as kebab to a dirty diner
It's not real meat, anyway!
I could get your folks to forget you on the freeway,
Sell you to a freak show on its way to Uruguay,
I could get you stuck on a fairground ride (Forever!)
Send you to a wedding in Somewhere-stan--with you as the bride!
I can't say...goodbyyye
But it's no use trying to deny
That I don't want to be friends with you
So do whatever you have to doooooooooo...

The Singing [5.31]

[The scene opens on a rainy day]
Shower Head: (singing) The day might be gray, but you can chase all your troubles away when you're singiiiinnng!
[A sleepy Nicole hears the voice from the bathroom and walks up]
Shower Head: So things may seem blue, but what does that matter to you when you're singiiinnng! (Nicole opens the curtain) Oh! Hey, don't you ever knock?
Nicole: (singing) You're too loud! Keep it down, or you'll wake everybody in town with your (threatening) SINGIIIINNG!
Shower Head: (laughs) You look rough and half-dead. Did you get out the wrong side of bed?? Let's keep singiinnng!
[Nicole rips the shower head off the wall and into a trash can]

The Petals [5.35]

[The scene cuts to a gardening store. Gumball and Darwin spray Leslie with fertilizer, causing him to suffocate]
Leslie​​​: [Coughing] Wait!
[He puts his leaves over his face, and when he lifts them, discovers that he has become more handsome]
Leslie​​​: [Gasps] I'm beautiful. Wait! I'm more beautiful than I've ever been!
[The camera pans out, revealing Leslie's rippling pecks as his leaves undulate in the wind]
Leslie​​​: Look at me, world, and gag upon my eleganza!
[Leslie laughs diabolically, but the scene reveals itself to be a fertilizer-adled hallucination as he lies on the floor giggling, no less hideous. Gumball and Darwin look at him with disgust and spray him one more time, causing him to pass out]

Leslie​​​: I don't care about the people who love me! I've already got their validation. It's the people who don't love me I need to impress! [Makes a fashion pose]
Gumball: [Reading the gardening book] Wait a second. Dude, I've got it! You're just wilting! It's completely normal.
Leslie​​​: Really?
Gumball: Yeah! And there's a very simple solution.

Gumball: Leslie! Would you stop being a drama queen and listen to us for a second?
Leslie: Since when is being scared of decapitation considered over-dramatic?!
Darwin: We're doing this for your own good, man. Think about your face. It'll just continue rotting.
Leslie: Hmm. So you're saying it's better to leave a hot memory than cold compost. I agree! Do it!
Gumball: [laughing] What? No, your head will regrow.
Leslie: Oh. Alright, then!
[Leslie tugs at his head until he pulls it off, collapsing straight after. After that, Gumball and Darwin shift back into their Gardening Thyme faces to finish the show.]
Gumball: And that concludes our episode.
Darwin: And when will we get to see our pretty flower grow, Gumball?
Gumball: When spring comes back in about six months.

The Puppets [5.36]

(The episode opens in the Wattersons' attic.)
Darwin: Why do we have to give them away? These toys have sentimental value. It's not like anyone's gonna love 'em like we do.
Gumball: Dude, we've kept them in the attic for, like, seven years.
(Darwin picks up a toy named Smack It!)
Darwin: Wow! Why did we ever stop playing with this? It was awesome!
(Darwin presses the toy's button and music starts to play on it.)
Smack It! toy: Push me...(voice and music distorting) Hold me... Squeeeeeze meeeee...
Darwin: Eh, it never sounded as kid-friendly after we dropped it. Hey, remember our old digi-pet? We had to feed it and change its diaper and stuff.
(Darwin presses a button on the digi-pet, but nothing happens.)
Darwin: Eh, out of batteries.
(When Darwin tosses the digi-pet in the trash bag, the pet sloppily writes "CLEAN ME" on the screen.)
Darwin: (gasps) Mighty Flyz! The warrior that rules the sky!
(Darwin screams as the Mighty Flyz toy breaks a lightbulb, cuts a ladder, flies out of the house, chops a power line, cuts off the tip of a tree, and kills a nearby bird.)
Gumball: (imitating the deep voice in commercials) Mighty Flyz takes no responibility for any limbs, eyes or innocence lost, while enjoying the Mighty Flyz line of products. What else can we give away?

The Line [5.38]

[Rotten Cupcake and Julius watch the video, which shows Gumball disguised as a movie critic, "reviewing" the film]
Gumball: What up, Elmore Streamers, it's Dollyboy1923, aka PixelDonkey. I just got back from seeing Stellar Odyssey, Colon, The Force Rehashed. No spoilers, but it's so refreshing to see less CGI space battles and more sock puppets. And what a brave decision it was to recast all the main characters as female, including the robots.
Julius: Ughh, I can't believe it! They ruined the whole [Throws phone onto the ground] franchise! [Angrily walks away]
Rotten Cupcake: Dude, that was my phone! You could've just stopped the video. [Walks away]

The News [5.40]

(After the intro sequence, the news anchor appears on camera, where the makeup makes last-minute adjustments before being gestured away.)
Kip: Hello! I'm Kip Schlevishinger, and this is Elmore News! Dramatic events unfold today as police were called in to tackle a robbery that took place in broad daylight--further proof that our town is no longer safe for anyone, anytime, anyday, anywhere in any way. Anywho, we have a reporter who is live at the scene of the robbery. Mike.

(The camera cuts to Mike the Microphone Guy, covering the scene of the robbery.)

Mike: Thanks, Kip. Elmore Police received an anonymous call at around 1:00 pm reporting a robbery here at Joyful Burger. The units have responded with a low-key operation, handling the situation with sensitivity and minimal force.
(The camera zooms out to show the police surrounding the parking lot, wearing SWAT armor and with tasers at the ready--the EXACT opposite of "minimal force".)

Kip: Celebrity news now, as the beloved children's entertainer Daisy the Donkey suffered what can only be described as an on-set meltdown.

(A clip of the Daisy the Donkey TV show plays.)

Daisy: Good morning, little children!
Children's Voices: Good morning, Daisy!
Daisy: Hahaha! Welcome to Daisy the Donkey Show!
Children's Voices: Yay!
Daisy: Today, I have a special surpri--

(Daisy's costar, Sally the Snake, jumps onto the set.)

Sally: Hi, kidsssss!
Daisy: (scoffs) I can't believe this. Did you read the script?! YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO COME IN AFTER MY LINE!!
Sally: Sorry, man. I was just improvising, you know, winging it. So, kids, is everybody s--
Daisy: (cutting Sally off) Okay, okay, okay, okay. First off, you don't call me "man". You call me Ms. Daisy. And secondly--YOU STICK TO THE DARN SCRIPT!!!!!
[beat]
Sally: Dude, we're live.
Daisy: I DON'T CARE IF WE'RE LIVE! YOU'RE AN AMATUER, SURFING UP MY WAY, AND RIGHT NOW, YOU'RE RUINING MY SHOW! (shoves Sally)
Sally: HEY! Did you just push me?

(Daisy answers with a mocking nod.)

Sally: 'Cause I'LL PUSH YOU RIGHT BACK!!!

(Daisy and Sally start fighting on set. The camera cuts far out to show the puppeteer still in character as Daisy rips off Sally's eyes)

Sally: (screams) MY EYESSSSS!

Season 6

The Rival [6.01]

Gumball: Listen, I'm not jealous! It's just, do you remember adopting Darwin bringing so much joy to our lives? Don't you think we should give that gift of happiness to another family? And by " that gift of happiness", I mean Anaïs. And by "another family", I mean a pack of scavenging hyenas.
Nicole: Look, I understand, you're not the little kids of the house anymore and it's a big adjustment. It was difficult for your father as well.
(Richard frowns sadly.)
Nicole: But just because there's a new baby in the house doesn't mean we'll love you any less.
Gumball: So love multiplies?
Nicole: No, it divides, but I'm willing to make sure to save advantage of your father's portion and hope our marriage survives until you go to college.
Richard: (nods along before realizing what she said) Wait, what?
Nicole: Now, let's hug.
[The four embrace, but Anais vengefully watches from her crib. In baby speak, she proclaims...]
Anais: (This is war. War does not determine who is right, only who is le-)
[When Anais slams down her hand, it lands on a music toy. She shifts to her baby nature as she laughs delightedly]

The One [6.05]

[Gumball is shown fixing the door with a screwdriver while Darwin watches.]
Gumball: There.
[Tobias is heard rolling into the living room before finally arriving in frame]
Tobias​​​​​: Oh, hey!
[Gumball and Darwin scream]
Tobias​​​​​: You fixed the door! That reminds me of that time we fixed the roof after Ocho blew it up.
[Flashback to the epilogue of "The Phone," though Darwin is shown with large buck teeth]
Darwin: You know, I'm glad I had the strength of character to give up that cell phone- [Scene pauses, music stops] Okay. First of all, why did you alter this memory just to give me massive teeth? And secondly, you weren't even there!
Tobias​​​​​​​​​​​​: [Answering off-frame] Yes I was!
[Camera zooms out to Tobias; watching using binoculars. After a short pause, Tobias laughs]
Tobias​​​​​​​​​​​​: Classic us.
[Tobias makes a funny face while a horn plays in synchronization.]
Gumball: 'Kay, enough! [Flashback ends] You weren't here when we fixed the roof, and you won't be here when we fix the door!
Tobias​​​​​​​​​​​​: But you already fixed the-
[Gumball and Darwin try to throw Tobias out again, but this time the door does not open]
Gumball: Dagnabbit, fixed it too well.

Tobias: What do you mean there are unspoken differences between types of friends and that we're kind of okay friends but not best friends?!
[Gumball prepares to speak again, but--]
Tobias: What do you mean this all stems from my narcissistic delusion about being unable to face my true place in the universe?!
[Gumball and Darwin confusedly look at each other before Tobias continues]
Tobias: What do you mean...(singing) you don't wanna be mooooooore than just regular friennnnnnnnnds-uh.

The Cringe [6.07]

[The scene shifts to the shower room]
Gumball: One...two...three! Bam! Gym shower! How's that for awkward? What! [Looks down at Hot Dog Guy] Just noticed that you are pretty much wearing shorts.
[The camera cuts to a full view, revealing Hot Dog Guy wearing shorts]
Hot Dog Guy: What? If anything, it makes it more awkward.
Gumball: Uh, yeah--for me! It's like showing up to a costume party while everyone else is dressed for a black-tie event.
Hot Dog Guy: [under his breath] More like showing up for a black-tie event only wearing a black tie.
Gumball: [groans] This won't work if we can't reach full cringe. It's like a hot air balloon trying to take off! It's never gonna happen if one of the guys is still wearing his pants!
[beat]
Hot Dog Guy: Wait, what?
Gumball: Come on, man! Take them off!
Hot Dog Guy: No!
Gumball: JUST TAKE THEM OFF!!
Hot Dog Guy: [gritting teeth] LEAVE IT!
Gumball: JUST TAKE OFF YOUR CLOTHES!!!

(At the Watterson house, Gumball and Hot Dog Guy tune in to Elmore's Got Talent)

TV Announcer: Welcome to Elmore's Got Talent! Watch as the anglerfish of fame lures small fry into its jaws using the blinding power of starlight! Laugh at their crushed dreams! Applaud as we create the idols of today so you can burn them tomorrow! And now for the worst audition of the week...

(The show plays the clip of Gumball and Hot Dog Guy auditioning together. Gumball starts beatboxing weakly, and Hot Dog Guy follows him up, no less awkward. As the two watch their embarrassing clip, they begin cringing from the erratic movements, awkward hand motions, and horrible sound effects. Soon, their cringing goes so violently, the scene around them fades to black. The screen opens on a heart rate monitor, where the boys wake up in a hospital.)

Doctor: You boys are very lucky to be alive. You have experienced a cringe level at 100,000 DJ. That's the equivalent of hearing 100,000 dad jokes all at once. I recommend stopping whatever it is you're doing before you end up with the clenching muscles of a 40-year-old clam!
Gumball: Thank you, doctor, but we've done enough.

The Anybody [6.11]

The Candidate [6.12]

Voice: [On television] Thirty-two donkeys playing on a sled,
One fell off it and hurt his leg...
Santa called the doctor, and the doctor said,
No more donkeys playing on that sled!
Thirty-three donkeys playing on a sled...
[All the students whose parents are contributing to the charity ball are shown to be completely exhausted]
Gumball: This has to stop!
Darwin: Really? Don't you want to see what happens to the thirty-second gosh-DARN DONKEY?!
Gumball: At least it's a distraction.

The Pact [6.13]

Gumball: So, what happened to your car?
[As Principal Brown thinks back, a flashback reveals him getting out of his car]
Principal Brown: Hm, I feel like I've forgotten something...
[He forgot the handbrake. Failing to realize that, Principal Brown's car rolls down the hill and crashes into the repair shop]
Principal Brown: [inhales] It's in the shop.

(Gumball and Principal Brown stay silent.)
Principal Brown: So, what do you want to talk about?
Gumball: Anything but girls.
Principal Brown: Oh, don't get me started on girls.
Gumball: I said NO GIRL TALK!!
Principal Brown: Suit yourself. So, I got this rash on my cheeks from shaving.
Gumball: (looking closer) They look fine to me.
Principal Brown: Not those cheeks.
Gumball: Okay, I changed my mind. Girl talk is fine.

[Ms. Simian slams down Gumball's test]
Ms. Simian: We need to talk, Watterson. When asked, "What led to the defeat of the British in Saratoga", you wrote "dental hygiene". When asked, "What was Abraham Lincoln most famous for", you wrote "dental hygiene". When asked, "Which medical profession did the state of Connecticut become the first to license, you wrote "DENTAL HYGIENE".

(Principal Brown drinks his coffee when a brick with a note tied to it smashes through the window. startling him)
Principal Brown: (reading the note) "You better hold up your end of the deal or I will tell Ms. Simian." Ha! He's bluffing.
(Another note comes through)
Principal Brown: (reading second note) "I'm not bluffing."
(Another note comes through)
Principal Brown: (screams) Hey! (reading third note) "I've nothing else to say. I just had to buy a full 200-page notepad and I don't want it to go to waste."
(Another note comes through)
Principal Brown: (reading fourth note) "So, how's it going?"

The Shippening [6.14]

Gumball: Well, his feelings are still intact. I'm sure he'll thank us one day.
Darwin: Yeah, maybe after six months of physiotherapy and learning how to talk again.

Darwin: How often would she get to use that catchphrase?
Gumball: Dude, I think you were right. I don't see how this day could get any weir-aaaaaand [Points offscreen] here we go.
[The shot then changes to a strangely-drawn adult Gumball and Carrie on a bench, holding a baby]
Darwin: [Yells] WHAT THE? GUMBALL! THIS IS SO MESSED UP!
Gumball: I know, right? I mean, a future me? Wearing sandals?
Darwin: I MEAN YOU'RE GONNA STEAL CARRIE FROM ME! IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE "CARWIN," NOT "CARBALL," YOU HOMEWRECKING WOMAN-EATER!
Gumball: [Shocked, points into the distance] And it looks like I didn't stop at women.
[Further away from the adult Gumball and Carrie, there is a wedding taking place between a female, anime-style, human Gumball, and a human, anime-style Darwin. Darwin screams upon seeing this and then sobs]
Gumball: I agree. Always thought I was the one wearing the pants in this relationship.

The Transformation [6.22]

(The scene opens at the Watterson house, where Gumball video chats with Penny)
Gumball: Okay, next one. Would you still love me if I had an amazing six-pack, but each ab had an udder?
Penny: Eh, but what kind of swimsuit would you wear at the beach?
Gumball: Oh, you know, just my usual trunks--and three bikini tops.

Penny: Okay, what would be the deal-breaker with me? Oh! What if I started wearing a dumb ponytail on the side like this? (Generates a side ponytail)
Gumball: Eh. Not so bad.
Penny: (Generates a ponytail above her head) What about this?
Gumball: Eh. Still manageable.
Penny: (Generates a ponytail in front of her face) How about now?
Gumball: Oh, I can already see it! Us driving away, you at the wheel. Cans rattling behind us under the "just married" sign as we disappear into the sunset--over the edge of a cliff!

The Possession [6.31]

Nicole: So, are you planning on staying long?
Granny Jojo: Only for a couple of days. The mattresses are hard and the food's overcooked. Where's Richard?
Gumball: He's in the kitchen. Mom told him to get rid of the refrigerator because it's broken.
[In the kitchen, Richard is comforting the fridge as it eerily shutters.]
Gumball: But, he got upset 'cause it's his favorite possession.
Darwin: So he chained himself to it and swallowed the key.
Anais: But it was the key to the shed, so mom unchained him.
Gumball: Then he chained himself to it again and swallowed the key.
Darwin: But it was the key to the back gate, so mom unchained him.
Anais: Then he chained himself to it again and swallowed the key.
Gumball: It was still the wrong key, so mom unchained him.
Darwin: And now we don't know what the key he swallowed is for.
[Richard hiccups. A car alarm is heard outside.]
Gumball, Darwin and Anais: Oh! Mom's car.

The Web [6.38]


Gumball: Mom, your profile is public!
Nicole: Yeah, so what? I've got nothing to hide.
Gumball: (scrolls to a posted photo) Oh, yeah? What about that?
Nicole: What? It's just a birthday photo with my parents. Nothing special.
Gumball: Really? It's like you literally gift-wrapped your identity for internet fraudsters. First, they know when your birthday is. Second, they know your address on that birthday card, and finally they know your credit card number--front and reverse! And on a side note, you look like you have a tiny guy on your back.
Darwin: And please stop with the quotes from these little munchkin things. They're scientifically proven to destroy brain cells.
Nicole: (continues looking at the munchkin posts) Nonsense! How can engaging in such fun and amusing jokes accelerate (intelligence decreasing) the deterioration of my...my...grey sack in the head that makes the thinkings come and, uh...Nicole forget what saying, and how to do swallowing...

(Seeing the adults of the Rainbow Factory being so bad at computers, the boys laugh)
Gumball: You know what the funny thing about this is?
Darwin: (laughing) These guys are fully grown adults!
Gumball: They're in charge of, like, everything! They drive cars.
Darwin: They vote!
Gumball: They're responsible for the planet.
[Their laughter immediately stops upon the realization that the adults' technophobic nature will cost them the Earth]
Gumball and Darwin: WE'RE DOOMED.

Gumball and Darwin: (singing)
We made it through the Ice Age,
The plague, and two World Wars
But now we're facing doom
With computers in the hands of dinosaurs
Feel the doom impending,
'Cause stupidity is #trending...
They go online, click every link
Like puppets of Big Brother, Inc.
Surrendering their privacy
To every pop-up ad they see
Feel the doom impending,
'Cause stupidity is #trending...
Believe and post and share fake news until their brains have turned to ooze
Befriending every fraud and bot so that their minds are sure to rot
"Y polar bears lie abt global warming?
Click on link below, sign up now
Make your hairs grow, want to B more beautiful face
Free stuffs available in <<place>>
Doctorate with no graduating
Singles in Elmore, no w8ting
Click here to stop your crush from unfriending
Current account verification code breakdown"
C313F4_R31H48613129
Feel the doom impending,
'Cause stupidity is #trending...
But they're the ones that make the world turn,
But there's nothing we can do except watch it all BUURRRRRN!!!

The Mess [6.39]

Gumball: What is happening here, man?! It's like our lives [As he says the following lines, the picture glitches out] are being edited (3x) by a thirteen-year old [Glitches out] vlogger or something. One minute, we're here [High-pitched] and the next thing we know, we're like "Raaaaaaaa!" and two minutes later we're like "Wooyooyooyooyoo!" and that leaves me completely like [Groaning]. You know what I mean?
Darwin: I'm not sure. But it seems like every time we blink, time skips forward. So I say we don't close our eyes until we find Polly.
Gumball: I agree. [His phone vibrates, pulls it out] "Your cab is arriving."

[Gumball and Darwin, now bruised, open their eyes to find themselves back home]
Mr. Fitzgerald: I had to say, boys. I took you for a couple of slack-jawed buffoons, but you did a really good job.
[The boys, confused, look around until they see Polly between them]
Polly: Hello.
Gumball: Oh, my gosh! You're aliiiiiiii-- [remembers the family near them] --ively child! Congratulations, sir! She must take after you. O-or you, Mrs. Fitzgerald. It's hard to tell, you look so alike. Uh, you related?
[The Fitzgeralds send confused eyebrows at Gumball]
Mr. Fitzgerald: Polly, say goodbye and get your stuff. Goodbye, kids.

[The boys nervously laugh until Penny confronts them]
Penny: WHAT HAPPENED?!
Gumball: Uh, nothing? What makes you say that?
[Penny proves her point by emphasizing the five key pieces of evidence of a "potential" incident: Gumball's bruised eye, the fat cat on the couch, Darwin's bruised lips, the meat snowman, and the harp-playing bullfrog toy.]
Gumball: Alright. We lost her...
Penny: Then what happened?
Gumball: That's the thing. We don't really know.
Polly: I do. It started when I arrived...

The Inquisition [6.44]

Rob: [last lines] Oh no. It started.

Promo

Who is Gumball Watterson?

Gumball: So who is Gumball Watterson? Here are some things people have said about me.
Lucy Simian: Gumball!
Carrie: Is the most—
Anais: Amazing!
Darwin: Dude!
Nicole: Don't have time—
Richard: To say all the good things—
Mister Small​​: About...
Banana Joe: This!
Anais: Amazing!
Darwin: Dude!
Gumball: So, there you have it...
[Gumball leans back too far, however, he falls off the chair.]

Cast

  • Gumball
  • Darwin
  • Kirby
  • Penny
  • Anais
  • Nicole
  • Richard

External links

Wikipedia
Wikipedia