Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2

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He says, "Welcome to the frickin' Guardians of the Galaxy!" Only he didn't use "frickin’".
Seems like this establishment is the wrong kind of disreputable.

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 is a 2017 American superhero film, a sequel to the 2014 film Guardians of the Galaxy, both based on the Marvel Comics superhero team Guardians of the Galaxy.

Directed by James Gunn. Produced by Kevin Feige. Written by James Gunn.
You only get one chance to save the galaxy twice.

Dialogue[edit]

Quill: [holding a device in his fingers] Showtime, a-holes! [the device beeps] It'll be here any minute.
Gamora: Which will be its loss. [cocks her weapon she's holding]
Quill: I thought your thing was a sword?
Gamora: We've been hired to stop an inter-dimensional beast from feeding on those batteries and I'm going to stop it with a sword?
Quill: It's just, swords were your thing and guns were mine, but I guess we're both doing guns now. I just didn't know that.
Gamora: Drax, why aren't you wearing one of Rocket's aero-rigs?
Drax: It hurts.
Gamora: [confused] It hurts?
Drax: [after lightning flashes] I have sensitive nipples.
Rocket: [he suddenly breaks into laughter, then imitates as Drax] "My nipples hurt! Oh, goodness me!"
Drax: What about him? What's he doing?
Rocket: [standing by some big audio speakers] I'm finishing this so we can listen to tunes while we work.
Drax: How is that a priority?
Rocket: Blame Quill! He's the one who loves music so much.
Quill: No, I actually agree with Drax on this. [as Drax casually points, letting Rocket know what he is saying] That's hardly important right now.
Rocket: Oh… okay. [starts winking] Sure, Quill.
Quill: [now being serious] No. Seriously... I side with Drax.
Rocket: No, I understand that. You're being really serious right now. [continues winking]
Drax: I can clearly see you winking!
Rocket: D*** it. Using my left eye? [turns down to see three Orloni's, Baby Groot appears where he pushes one over and punches another one]
Baby Groot: [turns to Rocket] I am Groot.
Rocket: They were not looking at you funny. [thunder and lightning flash in the sky with colored details; the Abilisk falls out of the sky] Well. That's intense.
[As the Abilisk continues to fall, Drax, with his knifes, runs up to his place. Once the monster lands on the ground, Drax lets out a battle cry and all four of the Guardians start battling the monster as Baby Groot looks the plugs that he is holding; he finally plugs them together. Mr. Blue Sky starts as Baby Groot starts revving to the beat; the screen freezes where it reads "Guardians of the Galaxy" and "Vol. 2" lightning up]

Drax: Gamora is not the one for you, Quill.
Quill: D*** shadow.
Drax: There are two types of beings in the universe: those who dance, and those who do not.
Quill: Mmm-hmm...
Drax: I first met my beloved at a war rally.
Quill: Oh, G**...
Drax: Everyone in the village flailed about, dancing. Except one woman. My Ovette. I knew immediately she was the one for me. The most melodic song in the world could be playing. She wouldn't even tap her foot. Wouldn't move a muscle. One might assume she was dead.
Quill: That does sound pretty hot.
Drax: It would make my nether regions engorge.
Quill: Okay. I get it, yes. I'm a dancer, Gamora is not.
Drax: You just need to find a woman who is pathetic... like you.
Quill: Thanks, buddy.

Nebula: [being tied up] I'm hungry. Hand me some of that yaro root.
Gamora: No. It's not ripe yet... and I hate you.

Rocket: Quill, later on tonight, you're gonna be laying down on your bed, there's gonna be something squishy in your pillowcase. And you're gonna be like, "What's this?", and it's gonna be because I put a turd in there! [takes back a control]
Quill: You put your turd in my bed, I shave you!
Rocket: Oh, it won't be my turd, it'll be Drax's.
Drax: [suddenly breaks in laughter as Quill takes back Rocket's control] I have famously huge turds!

Stakar Ogord: So what are you following us for?!
Yondu: 'Cause you're gonna listen to what I gotta say!
Ogord: I don't gotta listen to nothing. You betrayed the code. Ravagers don't deal in kids!
Yondu: I told you before, I didn't know what was going on...
Ogord: You didn't know 'cause you didn't wanna know that made you rich.
Yondu: I demand a seat on the table. [showing his flame on his uniform] I wear these flames, same as you!
Ogord: You may dress like us, but you'll never hear the hordes of freedom when you die, Yondu! And the colors of Ogord will never flash over your grave. [pulls him closer] If you think... I take pleasure... in exiling you... you're wrong. [quiet and severe] You broke all our hearts!
[Ogord with members, except for Martinex, leave Yondu alone. He and Martinex stare a moment before he leaves with the others as Yondu lowers his head in depress]

Ayesha: [after arriving on Iron Lotus] Yondu Udonta…I have a proposition for you.
[Sudden cut back to Ego and Mantis with the Guardians sitting by a fire.]
Ego: I hired Yondu to pick you up after your mother passed away. But, instead of returning you, Yondu kept you. I have no clue as to why.
Quill: I'll tell ya why: I was a skinny little kid who could slip into places adults couldn't, made it easier for thieving.
Ego: Well, I've been trying to track you down ever since.
Drax: I thought Yondu was your father.
Quill: What? You're trying to tell me that this whole time you thought Yondu was my actual blood relative?
Drax: [mouthful] You look exactly alike!
Rocket: One's blue!

Gamora: What was that story you once told me about Zardu Hasselfrau?
Quill: Who?
Gamora: He owned a magic boat?
Quill: [long pause] David Hasselhoff?
Gamora: Right.
Quill: Not a magic boat. A talking car.
Gamora: Why did he talk again?
Quill: To help him fight crime, and to be supportive!
Gamora: As a child, you would carry his picture in your pocket and you would tell all the other children that he was your father, but that he was out of town shooting Knight Rider or touring with his band in Germany.
Quill: I told you that when I was drunk. Why are you bringing that up now?
Gamora: I love that story.
Quill: I hate that story.
Gamora: It's so sad!
Quill: As a kid, I used to see all the other kids off playing catch with their dad. And I wanted that, more than anything in the world!
Gamora: [referring to Ego] That's my point, Peter. What if this man is your Hasselhoff?

Gamora: What are those?
Mantis: If I touch someone, I can feel their feelings.
Quill: You read minds?
Mantis: No. Telepaths know thoughts. Empaths feel feelings, emotions. May I?
Quill: Alright.
Mantis: [touches Quill's hand; as she feels his feelings, her antennas lit up] You feel... love!
Quill: Yeah, I guess I feel a general, unselfish love for just about everybody around me.
Mantis: No. Romantic, sexual love...
Quill: No... no, I don't...
Mantis: For her! [points at Gamora]
Quill: No! [Gamora looks disgusted] That is not... [Drax suddenly starts laughing uproariously] Okay. [Drax continues laughing as he groans] That's... ugh.
Drax: Hahaha! [pointing at Quill] She just told everyone your deepest, darkest secret!
Quill: Dude, come on! I think you're overreacting a little bit.
Drax: You must be so embarrassed! [continues cackling as Gamora is now in amusement; to Mantis] Do me! Do me, do me!
[she reaches over and touches his chest, and immediately starts laughing along with him]
Mantis: I have never felt such humor! [she and Drax are laughing and pointing at Quill]
Quill: [to himself] So unbelievably uncool.
Drax: [stops laughing] Oh, Quill... [Mantis, who is giggling, walks over to Gamora to touch her]
Gamora: [suddenly grabs Mantis' wrist] Touch me, and the only thing you're gonna feel is a broken jaw. [pause as Mantis looks scared and looks at Gamora, before she finally lets go of her wrist]
Mantis: I can... also alter emotions to some extent.
Quill: Yeah, like what?
Mantis: If I touch someone who is sad, I can ease them into contentment for a short while. I can make a stubborn person compliant. But I mostly use it to help my master [Ego] sleep. He lies awake at night, thinking about his project.
Drax: ...Do one of those on me! [Mantis puts her hand on Drax's head]
Mantis: [as her antennas lit up] Sleep... [Suddenly, Drax immediately falls asleep and snores loudly]

Ego: There must be some life out there in the universe. Besides me, I thought. So, I set myself the task of finding it. [showing his human body] I created what I thought biological life to be like, down to the most minute detail.
Drax: Did you make a penis?
Quill: Dude!!!
Gamora: What is wrong with you?
Drax: If he's a planet, how could he make a baby with your mother? He would smoosh her!
Quill: I don't need to hear how my parents, uh…
Drax: Why?! My father would tell the story of him impregnating my mother every winter solstice.
Quill: That's disgusting!
Drax: [offended] It was beautiful! [disgusted] You Earthers so have hang-ups.
Ego: Yes, Drax, I've got a penis.
Drax: Ha! Thank you!
Ego: …and it's not half-bad.
Drax: Ahh. [interestedly stares at Ego's groin]

Kraglin: What are you gonna do with your share?
Nebula: As a child, my father would have Gamora and me battle one another in training. Every time my sister prevailed, my father would replace a piece of me with machinery, claiming he wanted me to be "her equal". But she won, again, and again, and again, never once refraining. So after I murder my sister, I will buy a warship with every conceivable machine of death. I will hunt my father like a dog and I will tear him apart slowly, piece by piece, until he knows some of the profound and unceasing pain I know every... single... day!
Kraglin: Yeah... I was talking about, like, a pretty necklace. Or a nice hat. You know. Something to make the other girls go "Ooh, that's nice."

Drax: How did you get to this weird dumb planet?
Mantis: Ego found me in my larva state. Orphaned on my home world. He (Ego) raised me by hand, and kept me as his own.
Drax: So you're a pet?
Mantis: I suppose.
Drax: People usually want cute pets. Why would Ego want such a hideous one?
Mantis: I am hideous?
Drax: You are horrifying to look at. Yes. But that's a good thing.
Mantis: Oh?
Drax: When you're ugly, and someone loves you, you know they love you for who you are. Beautiful people never know who to trust.
Mantis: Well, then I'm certainly grateful to be ugly!
Drax: Those pools, they remind me of a time when I took my daughter to the forgotten lakes of my home world. She was like you.
Mantis: Disgusting?
Drax: Innocent. [Mantis touches Drax, she senses his sadness and begins to cry]

Quill: Well, get ready for a eight hundred-foot statue of Pac-Man with Skeletor and Heather Locklear...
Ego: Whatever you want.
Quill: I'm gonna make some weird s***.

Watcher Informant (aka Stan Lee): [to a group of the Watchers] Oh, man. Anyway, before I was so rudely interrupted, at that time, I was a Federal Express man...

Rocket: What are you laughing at me for?
Yondu: You can fool yourself and everyone else, but you can't fool me. I know who you are.
Rocket: You don't know anything about me, loser.
Yondu: I know everything about you. I know you play like you're the meanest and the hardest, but actually you're the most scared of all.
Rocket: Shut up!
Yondu: I know you steal batteries you don't need, and you push away anyone who's willing to put up with you, 'cause just a little bit of love reminds you of how big and empty that hole inside you actually is!
Rocket: I said shut up!
Yondu: I know them scientists what made you, never gave a rat's ass about you!
Rocket: I'm serious, dude!
Yondu: Just like my own damn parents who sold me, their own little baby, into slavery! I know who you are, boy, because you're me.
[They both look at each other]
Rocket: ...what kind of a pair are we?

Nebula: [to Gamora] All any of you do is yell at each other. You're not friends.
Drax: You're right... We're family. We leave no one behind. [to Nebula] Except maybe you. [Nebula mocks at the Guardians]

Quill: [sees Nebula] What's Smurfette doing here?!
Nebula: Whatever I need to do to get a damn ride home.

Rocket: You people have issues!
Quill: [points out the viewscreen at Ego's screaming reforming avatar] Well, of course I have issues, that's my freakin' father!

Rocket: So we're saving the galaxy again?
Quill: I guess.
Rocket: Awesome! We're really gonna be able to jack up our prices if we're 2-time galaxy savers!

Yondu: [Nebula connects herself to a ship's weapons] This is gonna hurt!
Nebula: Promises, promises.

Quill: [to Yondu, floating in the air, hanging on his arrow] Haha!
Yondu: What?
Quill: You look like Mary Poppins.
Yondu: Is he cool?
Quill: [grinning] Hell, yeah, he's cool.
Yondu: I'M MARY POPPINS, Y'ALL!

Yondu: [to Rocket] I ain't done nothin' right my whole life, rat. You need to give me this.
Rocket: [pause, then gives Yondu a space suit and an aero-rig] A space suit and an aero-rig, I only have one of each. I...
Baby Groot: [slight pause] I am Groot.
Yondu: What's that?!
Rocket: [pauses] He says, "Welcome to the frickin' Guardians of the Galaxy!" Only he didn't use "frickin’".
Yondu: [as Rocket with Baby Groot fly away] Bye, twig.
Rocket: [to Baby Groot] We gotta have a serious talk about your language.

Gamora: Nebula, I was a little girl, trying to live day by day, not knowing or understanding what that meant to you. There are many other girls out there, like us. You can stay with us, and help them.
Nebula: I will help them, by killing Thanos.
Gamora: I don't know if that's possible. [stops Nebula from leaving] You will always be my sister. [hugs Nebula, who eventually hugs Gamora back, before she departs]

Kraglin: Pete! Captain found this for you in a junker shop. Said you'd come back to the fold someday.
Quill: What is it?
Kraglin: It's called a Zune. It's what everybody's listening to on Earth nowadays. It's got 300 songs on it.
Quill: 300 songs? Wait. [shows Kraglin the fixed arrow] Rocket grabbed the pieces, and reassembled them. I think Yondu would want you to have it.
Kraglin: Thanks… captain.

[All the other Ravagers arrive in their ships to tribute to Yondu as his ashes are flown through space]
Martinex: [to Stakar] He didn't let us down after all, captain.
Ogord: No, he did not, son. He did not. [Ogord, Martinex and their members salute]
Charlie-27: Fare thee well, old friend. [he and his members salute]
Aleta Ogord: Yondu Udonta, I will see you in the stars. [she salutes before her members do the same thing]
Mantis: It's beautiful.
Drax: It is. And so are you. [pause] ...On the inside. [Yondu's ashes form into a shape of the yaka arrow]

[After Yondu's funeral, some of his old friends from the Ravagers reunite]
Stakar Ogord: You know, it's a shame that it took the tragedy of losing Yondu to bring us all together again. But I think he would be proud knowing that we're back as a team.
Charlie-27: I'm in.
Martinex: Dope.
Mainframe: I miss you guys so much!
Aleta Ogord: Hell, yes.
[another Ravager, Krugarr, fabricates an image of 2 thumbs up]
Stakar Ogord: What do you say we go steal some shit?

[Back on Sovereign, Sovereign Chambermaid walks over to Ayesha, where she is sitting with her hair messed up and as she looks defeated]
Sovereign Chambermaid: High Priestess, the council is waiting.
Ayesha: They are perturbed I've wasted our resources. [pause as she looks at Chambermaid and then turning back] When they see what I have created here, their wrath will dissipate.
Sovereign Chambermaid: [looks at the thing that Ayesha created] It's a new type of birthing pod, ma'am?
Ayesha: [as camera switches to her and the birthing pod] That, my child, is the next step in our evolution. More powerful, more beautiful — more capable of destroying the Guardians of the Galaxy. I think I shall call him… Adam.

[Quill walks in a room in disgust as we see that Groot is growing back and is in adolescent stage as his room is a mess with piles of leafs and vines everywhere; Groot is also playing a video game on a holographic device]
Quill: Ugh! Dude! Seriously? You gotta clean up room! It's a complete mess!
Teen Groot: I am Groot.
Quill: I'm not boring, you're boring! You know what's boring? Sitting there, playing that mind-numbing game. What's boring is me, tripping over your vines every day. I'm not boring!
Teen Groot: [in a mimic voice] I am Groot.
Quill: And now I know how Yondu felt...

[Last lines of the film; the Watchers leave their informant as he despises his pleas for them to stay]
Watcher Informant: [to The Watchers] Hey, fellas. Hey, wait, where're you goin'? Hey, you were supposed to be my lift home. How will I get outta here? Hey! Oh, gee, I've got so many more stories to tell... aw, guys. Oh, gee...

Quotes about Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2[edit]

The four hours of green make up everyday, waking up at 2:45 in the morning, it was a blast for us. ~ Zoe Saldana
  • The word “Marvel,” as in comic books or movie studios, has become a foundational term of our culture. Yet you could sit through almost every one of today’s comic-book movies and not find a whole lot to marvel at. That’s where “Guardians of the Galaxy” came in. In an era of overstuffed, taped-together blockbusters, it was supremely funny, exciting, and well-made — a rock ‘n’ roll space opera, spectacular yet lithe, without a stray shot or sequence out of place, and with a wildly caustic yet devotional interplay among its motley crew of renegades that recalled the original 1977 “Star Wars” (obviously its chief influence). The film wielded the machinery of big-budget franchise filmmaking and trumped it at the same time. So the question of what “Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2” can do for an encore isn’t really, “Can it top the first film?” It’s more like, “Can it be as good?”
  • James Gunn’s “Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2” opens with a franchise-defining credit sequence. As an incredibly expensive CGI battle unfolds in the background, the camera stays on an adorable Baby Groot, dancing to ELO’s “Mr. Blue Sky.” This is a series more about whimsy, excitement and family than it is “things that go boom,” and that’s what really separates in the Marvel Cinematic Universe right now. And the clever opening credits, in which the other characters have the nerve to interrupt Baby Groot’s dance number as they fight for their lives, sets the tone perfectly for what’s to come: a thoroughly enjoyable summer blockbuster. This is the rare Hollywood CGI orgy that doesn’t take itself deadly seriously—like the current plague of superhero movies—and wants to be as purely entertaining as possible. To that end, a wave of heartfelt speeches and apocalyptic sequences hinder the final act and hold the film back from pure greatness, but you’ll have had enough fun by then that you won’t really care. To be blunt, “Vol. 2” avoids many of the flaws of the first movie, and does several things notably better. It’s fun, clever and a great kick-off to the summer movie season.
    • Brian Tallerico on Rogerebert.com [2]

Taglines[edit]

  • This summer, the galaxy won't save itself.
  • Obviously.
  • Anyone can save the galaxy once.
  • You only get one chance to save the galaxy twice.

Cast[edit]

External links[edit]