The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius/Season 1

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The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron, Boy Genius Season 1

Sourced[edit]

When Pants Attack[edit]

Judy: James Issac Neutron! How many times have I told you to pick up your pants?!
Jimmy: Well, I know just the dog who can answer that, mom. [Snaps fingers, Goddard comes out] Goddard, access maternal reprehend data, cross reference: pants.
[Goddard begins replaying the times Judy asked Jimmy to pick up his pants.]
Judy: [onscreen] Jimmy! Pick up your pants, please? -- Uh, Jimmy? Pick up your pants. -- Pick up your pants. -- Pants. -- Jimmy! -- Jimmy? -- Jimmy? -- Pick 'em up. -- Jimmy! -- Pick up... -- Pick up... -- Jimmy? -- ...Your pants!
[Screen says "54 times to date".]
Judy: I rest my case.

[Cindy presents her report with Jimmy unintentionally joining in.]
Cindy: Origami: the ancient art of Japanese paper folding. I will be making the most difficult of all origami structures; a snow monkey.
Jimmy: Actually, paper folding originated in China --
Cindy: Riding a flying dragon --
Jimmy: In the second century A.D. --
Cindy: While drinking tea --
Jimmy: And was brought to Japan --
Cindy: On a ladder --
Jimmy: In the sixth century --
Cindy: IN DECEMBER!
Miss Fowl: Cindy, I didn't know you and Jimmy were doing this report together.
Cindy: We're not!

Carl: Hey, Jimmy! Can I go play with my pants?
Jimmy: No, no, Carl! Your pants may look playful now, but deep down in their pockets, they're pure evil.
Sheen: Oh, no, I left some gum in my pants pocket. Is it -- is it evil, too? I-If I chew it later, will I be evil?! If I blow a bubble, will it be an evil bubble?!?

[Hugh is interrogating his pants.]
Hugh: So! You and your little pantsy-wantsy friends thought you could take over the world, huh? Well, you didn't know you had to deal with Hugh Neutron, did ya? So, talk. Ha-ha! Ya can't talk, can ya? You know why? Because you're pants! So, zip it!

Carl: I missed you, pants. It's so good to be back inside.
Sheen: Can we go to the movies now, Jimmy?
Jimmy: Okay! Last one there buys the candy!
[They are about to leave when Hugh and Judy stop them.]
Judy: James Issac Neutron! You made this mess, and you are not going anywhere until you pick up these pants!
[Reveal the mess all over the town.]
Jimmy: Mooooom!!

Normal Boy[edit]

Sheen: [after Jimmy attempts to use a Brain Drain helmet on himself] Wow, look at him. He looks so... so similar.
Carl: Aw, don't worry, Jimmy. There's always next time.
Jimmy: [notices the shine on his inventions, speaking in a derpy-like voice] Shiny? Shiny! I like shiny!
Carl and Sheen: It worked!
Jimmy: Hey, have you guys seen my loopy dance? [singing] I'm loopy, I'm loopy, I'm loopy, loopy, loopy...
Carl: You know, this new Jimmy seems kinda stupid.
Sheen: Yeah, he's really messed up. [beat] I like him!
Carl: Me too!
Sheen: Can we keep him?

Sheen: I got your nose!
Jimmy: AHH! MY NOSE! MY NOSE!
Carl: Give him his nose back, Sheen!

Miss Fowl: Okay, who can tell me the square root of 144? Bwaaak!
Jimmy: [raises hand] I know! Eleventy-six!
Miss Fowl: Well, no, I'm sorry, bwaak. That's wrong.
[All students gasp; Cindy raises her hand.]
Miss Fowl: Cindy?
Cindy: 12.
Miss Fowl: That's right, bwaak.
Cindy: YES!

Cindy: Come on, Neutron! Do one of your Brain Blast deals!
[Jimmy starts thinking, but all we see is a cymbal-clanging monkey.]
Jimmy: Ha ha! Funny monkey! Ha ha ha!

Cindy: Okay, Neutron. How does this work?
Jimmy: I don't know, Suzie.
Cindy: It's Cindy!
Jimmy: You're kinda cute...
[Cindy looks on, shocked.]
Cindy: [sigh] I'll wing it!

Birth of a Salesman[edit]

[Jimmy is outside school, along with Carl, Sheen, Libby & Cindy.]
Jimmy: Ladies and gentlemen... and Cindy, I want to show you the greatest thing your eyes have ever beheld!
Carl: A llama?
Jimmy: No.
Carl: A baby llama?
Jimmy: [scoffs] No!
Carl: A baby llama with a little hat on?
Jimmy: [angerier] NO!
Cindy: An invention of yours that actually works? [She and Libby laugh.]
Jimmy: NO!!.. I mean...yes! I present to you... my latest neutronic invention ... [Presents three pieces of miniature books] ... Book Gum. why read a book when you can just chew the book instead?
Sheen: Wow, Jimmy, chewing a book.
Jimmy: Sheen, you don't actually chew a book. See, I reduced the contents of different books to gum form. You chew it, and you know it.
[He gives some gum to Sheen, who chews it.]
Sheen: Tastes... fishy. [starts quoting from Moby-Dick] "Call me Ishmael. Starbuck, it's the great white whale. I'll get you, Moby Dick!"
Cindy: Give me a piece of that. [Takes a piece and chews] Hmm... It tastes like fried chicken. [starts quoting from Gone with the Wind] "Oh, Ashley, Oh, Rhett. I don't know nothin' about birthin' no babies."
[Carl is about to taste a handful of gum pieces.]
Jimmy: Careful, Carl. It would be very dangerous to eat more than one at a time.
[Carl selects a piece.]
Carl: Mmm... William Shakespeare.
Jimmy: That might just be a little strong for you, Carl.
Carl: [quotes Romeo's monologue from Romeo and Juliet, during which Cindy rolls her eyes in amazement] "But soft, what light through yonder window breaks? It is the east and Juliet is the sun. See how she leans her cheek upon her hand. Oh, that I were a glove upon that hand that I might touch that cheek."

Miss Fowl: Class, we're having a candy selling contest to raise money.
[all groaning and yawning]
Cindy: Boring.
Miss Fowl: The student who sells the most boxes will win a free VIP trip to Retroland!
[cheering]

Jimmy: Download candy and chocolate actualities and data...
Hugh: Oh, selling candy, eh, Jimbo? Well, you have come to the right dinner table. Welcome to the Hugh Neutron school of salesmanship. Class is in session. Pumpkin Pants, let's play traveling salesman.
Judy: Who should I be this time?
Hugh: You be the person who's not the traveling salesman. Knock, knock.
Judy: Who's there?
Hugh: It's me.
Judy: Well, come on in.
Hugh: Good evening, ma'am. Want to spice up your life?
Judy: Sure.
Hugh: Well, then what you need is this beautiful four-pronged eating implement.
Judy: But, sir, I already have one.
Hugh: But can yours talk? [with high-pitched voice] Hello. My name is Forky. You're pretty. Buy me! Buy me!
Judy: I'll take four.
Hugh: And that, Jimmy, is how where I got to be... where I am today. Bring on the pie.

Jimmy: The Willy Loman 3000—a super-selling machine programmed to make the sale at any cost. He will NOT take "NO!" for an answer.
[Gears whirring]

Jimmy: It's the good life, gentlemen. While the W.L. 3000 does all the work we're here enjoying a tall cold one.
Sheen: And plan our VIP trip to Retroland.
Carl: HUZZAH!
Sheen: What?
Carl: "Huzzah" some goofy way to say "COOL!"!
Man: What?!?
Willy: Goo-ood afternoon, sir. May I say you look absolutely f-f-fabulous? Ha-ha-ha, yes, I agree it is beautiful out, heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh...
Man: I don't want to buy nothin'.
Willy: "Buy"? Who said "buy"? I-I-I'd like to give you a piece of c-candy, absolutely free with no strings attached.
Man: Forget it.
Willy: You can never have enough ca-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-andy, sir.
Man: I can. And I DO! Good-bye.
[The man almost closes the door, but Willy blocks it.]
Willy: Y-yes, y-y-y-yes, this is a "g-good buy".
Man: [struggling to close the door] What part of "NO!" do you not understand?
Willy: [holds up Goddard] How about if I throw in this free-ee-ee-ee dog if you buy a box?
Man: Hmm... what kind of dog is he?
Willy: He's your kind of dog. C-congratulations.
[Willy gives Goddard to the man, takes his money and slams the door]
Man: [from inside the house] Hey, what does he ea-? Wha-? Wha-? Oh! OH! not on the carpet, yo-! Ooh... Are those lug nuts?

Willy: I have sold 1,000 boxes of c-c-candy.
Jimmy: Wow. Way to go, Willy! And now for some good old-fashioned gloating and I-told-you-so-ing. Oh, Miss Vortex!
Willy: [spots Carl and Sheen] Hey, hey, hey, hey, you look like a couple of intelligent young men.
Carl: Uh-uh. It's just the glasses.
Willy: Aa-aa-aa-aah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! And witty to boot. If you buy one measly box of ca-a-a-a-a-andy, you'll receive, as my gift to you, this handsome custom-made rocket. [points to Jimmy's rocket]
Carl: But that's Jimmy's rocket.
Sheen: But it's free!
Jimmy: What in the name of Einstein is going on?

Brobot[edit]

The Big Pinch[edit]

Jimmy: [sarcastic] Oh, I forgot about the ever popular mud-powered radio.
Cindy: And I forgot about your mud-powered brain!
Thomas Edison: Woo! That hovercar's a piece of work!
Jimmy: Thank you, Mr. Edison. You know, I achieved the upward thrust using strautium nitium-crusted fuel rods and titanium valuves.
Thomas Edison: Are you done? It's not that great, okay?

Jimmy: [mimicking Edison] Hey, you mangy canine, get away from there.
[Goddard barks]
Jimmy': [normal voice] Fooled you. It's just me, Goddard. See, I installed a voice transformer inside this walkie-talkie. Observe. [mimicking Edison] Whip-diddly-doo, everybody.
[Goddard whines]
Jimmy: [normal voice] Aw, Goddard, this is going to help me break up Edison and Miss Fowl. Now, come on pretend it's a nice, crunchy lug nut.
[Goddard belches]
Jimmy: Good boy. Good boy. Now here's the plan...

Sheen: [while stuck on a rollar coaster] Woo, yeah! Take it to the limit baby!

Jimmy: [in filtered voice over Goddard's PA system, Thomas Edison voice] "Roses are red, violets are blue. Miss Fowl's armpits stink like an old skunky."
Ms. Fowl: What?!

Jimmy: [Thomas Edison voice] I think you smell much more like an old cabbage.
Miss Fowl: [To Thomas Edison] I thought you were a gentleman!
Jimmy: [Thomas Edison voice] That's funny. I thought you were a gentleman the first time I saw you. Can I call you "Man-Lady"?

Thomas Edison: What's he doing here? And what's this?
Jimmy: [chuckles nervously] It's a funny story, actually.
Thomas Edison: [echoing] Hello. Hello. Who's in there? So, it was you saying all those things, eh?

Granny Baby[edit]

[Granny sits across from the Jimmy Dummy, trying to open a small bottle, as the real Jimmy enters with the Tonic behind his back.]
Granny: Good morning. [points to the dummy] I was just telling you over there about my deviated spatchum. On cold mornings it rattles like the Tin Man throwing up a hoagie full of wood screws
Jimmy: What’s in the bottle?
Granny: Tongue De-Furrer. Your tongue gets furry when you’re old. Sometimes I wake up it has chewing on it.
Jimmy: Let me open that for you. [Jimmy takes the bottle, turns his back - and when he turns back granny’s medicine is GLOWING and his flask is empty.] I think you’ll feel much better and quieter - after you drink this. [She up-ends it and smacks her lips distastefully.]
Granny: Tastes funny. Of course, what do I know – after sixty your sense of taste completely disapp- [Granny transform into a baby]
Jimmy: Granny?!

Granny Baby: Holy fiber cast I'm topless.
Jimmy: Oh man this isn't good Where'd you get the diaper?
Granny Baby: "I was already wearing one. [Poops in her diaper] Ooohh...I need my diapie changed!
Jimmy: Problem. Goddard, change diaper. [He refuses]
Granny Baby: Change me now! [cries and poops diaper again]

Libby: What was your first clue?
Jimmy: So you’ll do it?
Cindy: As much as I detest helping smug pseudo-brainiacs, my nurturing female instincts will not let me leave a helpless infant in your care. Where’s the new diaper?
Jimmy: New diaper? What's wrong the one she's wearing?
Cindy: It's full of poo! I though you were a geinus.
Granny Baby: Hey he's a guy. ha ha ha ha
Libby: [gasps] He...she she talked.

Granny Baby: Could we hurry up? I'm getting dizzy from my own fumes here! Ooohh Dolly
Cindy: How long she gonna be a baby?

Cindy: Well, how many diapers do we need?
Granny Baby: [Poops purposely 3 times] Well, I'll err, on the side of hundreds.

[Jimmy picks up bottles of DANGEROUS CHEMICALS (labeled as such). Cindy looks at a shelf, carrying Granny, who holds a rattle.]
Granny Baby: I’m bored! Make a funny face and let me hit you with a rattle.
Cindy: No.[Granny Baby cries.] Okay, okay! [Cindy does a funny face and Granny Baby hits her in a face with her rattle.]
Granny Baby: It's fun hitting you. Ha ha ha ha!
Jimmy: [whispering] Granny Granny quiet.
Guy: Did that baby just talk?
Jimmy: No. Ha ha, why? Everyone know babies can't talk.
Granny Baby: [To People] That's right. 'Cos if we could the Videotubbies’d became the subway, it’d make their head aerials spin. Ha ha ha ha!
[The people gasp. Jimmy and Cindy running from the clamoring mob.]

Crowd: We want the talking baby! We want the talking baby!
Jimmy: Goddard! Compare antidote completion with mother’s return time!

Jimmy: Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the amazing talking baby!
Crowd: Oooooh!
[Jimmy pulls a talking doll-type STRING rigged to Granny’s back. He WINDS IT UP with his hidden fingers.]
Baby Granny: Hey, give me a cuddle. And a diaper change while you’re at it. Ha ha ha
Crowd Member #1: Hey, hey there’s a string in her back.
Jimmy: Oh no I have been found out!
Crowd Member #1: Yes you have, son!

Time Is Money[edit]

Judy: [about Sheen & Carl] And what are they doing here? The big one is odd and the thin one is a weirdo.
Carl: Hey, you can't insult us like that!
Hugh: [tosses Carl and Sheen a gold brick] Here you go, get yourself something nice.
Sheen: Sure they can! [turns to Carl] Let's go, odd guy!
Carl: [snorts] You got it, weirdo!

Sheen: I liked the part about the medulla oblongata. I don't know what it means, but I love the way it sounds! [waves his UltraLord action figure at Carl] Back or I shall slay thee with my medulla oblongata!

Raise the Oozy Scab[edit]

Cindy: What kind of dunderhead would want to talk to a bunch of stupid fish?
Carl: I wanna talk to fish! I wanna talk to fish!! [snatches the microphone out of Jimmy's hand and sees a fish] Oh, hey there, little fella! Do you like Fish Snack 'Ems? They're made from fish like you, only chopped up into little bite sized pieces and deep fried in burning oil! [the fish screams and swims away]

Sheen: Lost?! We can't be lost! We only brought enough food for two days! And I'm not eating Carl!
Carl: Well, I'm not eating you, either! OK, maybe a bite.
[Cindy and Sheen step away from Carl]

Cindy: [about Jimmy] Throw him in the brig!
Jimmy: It'll take a lot more than ravenous hunger to turn my men against me! [puts fists on hips and stands proudly] Tell her, boys!
Sheen: I'll get some rope!
Carl: I'll hold him down!

I Dream of Jimmy[edit]

Jimmy: Carl, you're asleep. This is a dream.
Carl: Don't be silly. If this was a dream, could I do... [pulls a brain out from his head] this?
Jimmy: That's the only time you can do it! Carl, you're asleep, there are llamas in the classroom! Libby rowed to school with a plastic leg!!
Carl: Her paddle broke.

Jimmy: [trying to help Carl with his nightmare] You should do what I do during a nightmare. Simply prove on paper that the nightmare is a logical impossibility, and it vanishes.
Carl: Yeah, but my dreams aren't as logical as yours are. I married a turkey once.

Jimmy: [observing Carl's genius state in his dream] When Carl's asleep, he dreams he's a genius like me.
Cindy: Like you? Please, you can't even spell your own name!
[Jimmy looks down at his school desk, seeing apparently botched attempts at spelling "Jimmy"]
Carl: Now I need a dummy who will volunteer.
[Everyone points at Jimmy]
Jimmy: But I'm not dumb. I'm a genius!
[Everyone laughs]
Cindy: [giggling] If you're so smart, what's the square root of a flexnart?
Jimmy: That doesn't make any sense!
Carl: The square root of a flexnart is a cupful of boogers.
Libby: [dreamily] He did that all in his head!

Jimmy On Ice[edit]

Judy: [shivering] J-j-j-James Isaac N-n-n-neutron! Haven't we warned you about tampering with the unstable structure of a chaotic system?

Hugh: [after he and his posse mistake Jimmy and Godard in the distance for a caribou] There's gonna be caribou chili tonight boys.
All Three Men: [chanting] Ugh lugh lugh yeah! Ugh lugh lugh yeah! Ooooooooooh..... CARIBOU!

Judy: [to Jimmy] Sweetie, eat your caribou before it gets hard and icy.

Battle of the Band[edit]

Carl: I wrote a love song.
Jimmy: Is it about llamas?
Carl: NO! [quietly] Yes.

Sheen: Hey! Hey! What is this? I specifically requested dolphin-safe donuts! I refuse to perform until all of my ridiculous demands are satisfied!

[While Jimmy, Carl & Sheen are fighting with each other.]
Jimmy: Wait a minute. Sheen, Carl! What are we doing?
Sheen: Well, I was about to strangle Carl.
Carl: Yeah, and I was about to slap Sheen on the back of the head.

See Jimmy Run[edit]

Ms. Fowl: [after Jimmy invisibly steals her sandwich] Well I....Who took my sandwich? [spots a squirrel] So that's your game, is it? well, Mr. I'm-Too-Good-For-Acorns, how'd you like a nice detention?

Trading Faces[edit]

Jimmy: [as Cindy] Do you think I spent enough hours on my hair this morning? Hey, everybody, look at my ankles! When'll I ever get a pair of pants the right length? [laughs] Who knows?

Carl: [to Libby] Can Cindy whistle?
Libby: I don't know.
Sheen: We gave Jimmy rapturous enjoyment of mustard. Let's give Cindy whistling.

[After Jimmy is put back in his body.]
Jimmy: [smiling] I can't see my ankles.
Carl: [screaming] Oh, no! He's blind!
Jimmy: Uh, no, Carl. I have my own pants back!

The Phantom of Retroland[edit]

Carl: Sheen, the phantom of Retroland is gonna tear us limb from limb and eat us! Say something!
Sheen: You ever notice how Jimmy's hair is like one of those gum massager things? It's all swirly and... What?!

Jimmy: Glad you could make it, Sheen. How did you sneak out?
Sheen: Oh, I just told my grandma that I had to go to a deserted theme park to be eaten by a maniac. She told me to wear clean underwear.

Phantom #3: [sniffs] What's that smell?
Sheen: You mean [points to Phantom #3] your salami leg, [points to Cindy and Libby] their salami leg, [points to Nick] his salami leg, [points to Carl's feet] or Carl's shoes?

My Son, the Hamster[edit]

Sheen: Jimmy! You're like a hamster! Or a gerbil! Or a dolphin or something!

Judy: [to Hugh] Why don't you spend some quality time with Jimmy? It could be a special Father-Son day.
Hugh: That's a great idea! I used to have those with my Aunty all the time! Only we called them Aunty-Nephew days, but it's probably the same basic, uh, idea. We could go to the park, we could, uh... eat cheese! We could even go to Retroland! I love those zig-zaggy lines! They're so ... not ... straight.
Judy: [sighs] Oh, Hugh.

Hall Monster[edit]

Cindy: [to Jimmy] Okay, Neutron, you're outta control! I'm making a citizen's arrest!
Sheen: I want a public defender!
Libby: I... I want my music!
Carl: [cries] I want my mommy! [whimpers and then smiles] And some fudge!

Jimmy: [to Carl] You've exceeded the number of llama stickers on your lunchbox!
Carl: [nervously] I know...but I... I have a special permit.

Hypno Birthday to You[edit]

Sheen: [rolls dice] Seven! [chuckles] Your llama is sucked into a volcanic sinkhole, where flesh-eating bats will nip at his screaming face. [eats popcorn]
Carl: Sheen, there aren't any volcanic sinkholes in Llama's Day Out!
Sheen: Maybe that explains why I'm not having fun. [eats popcorn]
Jimmy: [Enters] Hi, Carl. I ran out of chemicals mid-experiment and I know you got a chemistry set for your birthday?
Sheen: [rolls dice] Eleven!
Carl: Hey, you can use my chemistry set, Jim. [He gets his Mama's Boy chemestry set down from a shelf.] Oh, the potato's not included.
Jimmy: Uh, that's okay. I assume it comes with a few cc's of ethyl mercaptin?
Carl: Uh... no.
Jimmy: Well, I can work around that. How about some, uh... dimercural sulfonative?
Carl: Uh... yeah...? No.
Jimmy: Tritium nitrate?
Carl: I've got salt.
Jimmy: Oh, Pukin' Pluto! How's a guy supposed to make a four-dimensional Hypercube molecule without access to the complete spectrum of inorganic chemicals?!
Sheen: Welcome to my nightmare. [eats popcorn]
[Jimmy rolls his eyes.]
Carl: [Walks over carrying a leaflet] Here you go, Jimmy. Check out this leaflet from inside the box.
Jimmy: [reading leaflet] "Also try our Ultra-Deluxe model. Contains every element from aluminum to zirconium." Now, that's what I'm talkin' about! [suddenly blue, sighs] Aw, who am I kidding? I don't have any money, and my birthday's three months away.
Sheen: [eats popcorn] Ah, quit procrastinating, Carl, for I'm not -- forget it! I'm rolling for you! [rolls one die and piece of popcorn] One! [chuckles] And Carl's llama falls down. Down into the sulfurous mud pit! How the snake god will be pleased!
Carl: Hey, how could you roll the one if there are two dice?
Sheen: Huh? Oh. Yeah... [Picks up the die and popcorn; suddenly grabs throat and chokes.] Someone get me the jaws of life!

Krunch Time[edit]

["The Wheels on the Bus" Instrumental]
Sheen: Do you want something gummy or crunchy?
Carl: Uh, I want sour. No! Salty. No! I don't know which one to choose!
Sam: Oh, this suspense is killing me. Pick a candy and let me get on with my life. Yeah, yeah.

Hugh: [as the crowd riots at Jimmy about destroying the leftover candy, yelling "Down with Jimmy!"] I can't believe I'm saying this to my own son - but that candy's just too dog-gone good.
Judy: Don't talk; chant!
Crowd: Down with Jimmy! Down with Jimmy!
Jimmy: People, listen to me! It's just candy!

Sam: [as Jimmy is hiding out in the Candy Bar to avoid the mob of people] Well, look who's here. Mr. "I'm-going-to-invent-the-best-candy-in-the-world-and-put-the-Candy-Bar-out-of-business".
Jimmy: I'm sorry, Sam. I didn't mean to. I didn't know my candy would be that popular.
Sam: That's what the guy who invented underpants said! Anyways, you better skedaddle. That angry mob's gonna be here any moment.
Jimmy: How do you know that?
Sam: I called them. What do you expect? I've gone broke here! [crowd starts chanting "Candy! Candy!" outside the Candy Bar] Uh-oh. Rhythmic chanting. That's a bad sign, yeah.
Jimmy: Oh, what am i gonna do? Think, think, think.

Substitute Creature[edit]

Libby: What's that supposed to be?
Sheen: The rare Punching Plant of Melbore 9, as seen in UltraLord epsiode 64, "Attack of the Salad Fixin's"!
Libby: Looks like a boxing glove glued to a fern, if you ask me.
Sheen: Well, nobody asked you! Anyway, what have you come up with that's so wonderful?
Libby: I researched plants' responses to musical stimuli. This one got two hours of classic R&B a day while this one got two hours of Yodelling to the Oldies.
Sheen [pointing to the one that got two hours of "Yodelling to the Oldies"]: That one looks dead.
Libby [shakes her head sadly]: It never had a chance.

Jimmy: Well, it's not my fault my plant mutated a seed pod launcher for trans-species propagation! Nobody could've predicted that!
Sheen: Or pronounced it.

Jimmy: I can fix him! I just need to get another toaster!
Cindy: Uh-huh.
Jimmy: And you guys need to... uh, get that DNA Ray out of Miss Fowl's stomach. Good luck, see ya, bye!
Libby: We have to what?
Sheen: You heard him. We have to make our teacher toss the lunch monkey. We need a bucket, an umbrella and whatever they were serving for lunch in the caferteria on Thursday! Goddard, hit it!
[Goddard plays town-saving music]

Safety First[edit]

Sheen: Hey, Jimmy, I've been meaning to ask you something.
Jimmy: I know, I know. Why am I carrying two lunches? Because of that bully Terry Finster! This way, after he steals mine, I still have something to eat!
Sheen: Actually, I was going to ask you who would win in a fight between Big Foot and a Komodo Dragon, but your question's good too.

Hugh: [to Jimmy] Just got a phone call from Terry's mom! Did you two have a little spat-a-roo?
Judy: Hugh, the talk?
Hugh: [clears throat] Once upon on time, a boy sparrow said to a girl sparrow, "Hey, nice feathers! Can I buy you some millet?" Well, the girl sparrow...
Jimmy: You know what, dad? I would really love to hear the rest, but I'm having a small emergency, bye!
Hugh: And when he got to her nest, he was alarmed to find out that her mother was a cantankerous old crow!
Judy: Hugh!

Crime Sheen Investigation[edit]

Sheen: You've gotta help me, Jimmy! If you don't, I'll have to ask complete idiots to help me and you know how unreliable they are!

Sheen: Don't feel bad, Jimmy. You tried your best. It just wasn't anywhere near good enough.

Carl: Hey, Sheen. What's up?
Sheen: You can look at my shockingly empty hands and ask me that? I've been robbed!
Jimmy: Robbed of what?
Sheen: Only my oldest and most prized UltraLord! He was like the atomic-breath blasting brother I never had!

Journey to the Center of Carl[edit]

[The students call Jimmy after the Sick Patches dissolve into their skin.]
Cindy: Your sick patch dissolved into my skin, Nerdtron!
Sheen: Jimmy, my patch pulled a Houdini!
Libby: Cure me or face the consequences!
Carl: I DON'T WANT TO BE A BUBBLE BOY!
Jimmy: Okay, okay, settle down! I can fix it! Carl, Sheen, sneak out and meet me in the you-know-what.

Carl: [singing] I got people inside me! I got people inside me! And they're walking in my brain!

Jimmy: We've reached our destination... [sniffs] the stomach.
Sheen: [seeing toys in the stomach acid] Man. [sniffs] Carl eats a lot of junk, doesn't he? Hey, Carl! You're supposed to play with the toys in The Silly Meals, not eat 'em!
Carl: I know, but they always look so colorful and chewy!

Jimmy: Sheen! Start crying!
Sheen: How am I supposed to cry right now? I don't cry, I'm a man!
Jimmy: Pretend that Ultra Lord just got canceled!
Sheen: [sobs] WHY IS THE WORLD SO CRUEL?!?

Aaughh!! Wilderness!![edit]

Hugh: Don't forget I was an Acorn Lad! I remember everything I ever learned like the song we used to sing! [singing] We are the Acorn Lads, something, something, the Acorn Lads.

Party at Neutron's[edit]

Hugh: Whoo-hoo! I can't believe it, Sugar-Booger! We're finally gonna get to see Ducks, the greatest musical ever made!
[Sings]
When you're a duck,
You're a duck all the way,
From the first time you quack
To the last egg you lay!
[Jimmy uses his Time Accelerator on him, speeding him up.]
When you're a duck
You will live in a blind.
With a little or long orange,
It's a fresh melon rind!
Du-u-u-u-u-u-ucks!
The Musical.
[Jimmy winks at the camera.]

Hugh: Let's get a move on, puddin'. Don't wanna miss the overture! [Sings, to the tune of Beethoven's 5th Symphony] Da-da-da-duuuuuck! Da-da-da-duuuuuck! [Continues singing]
Judy: Oh, Hugh. [To Jimmy] We'll be home around 11:30.
Hugh: Eh, Jimbo, you want us to... wake ya up when we get home and reenact the show?
Jimmy: Uh...no thanks.
[Hugh exits.]

Ultra Sheen[edit]

Carl: Oh my favorite video game?" Oh no no it's too much pressure. "Ninja llamas in space?" Eh no. "Llama vs. Mega Dingo?" Eh... [gasps] Of coarse! "Llama palooza!" [sighs] Oh I love you most of all. [kisses the video game.]

Sheen: ULTRALORD! NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
Carl: Oh, yeah! I'm bad! I DEFEATED ULTRALOOOOOORRRRD!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Broadcast Blues[edit]

Principal Willoughby: Jimmy, I'd like you to meet the new producer of Science with Jimmy!
[Cindy enters the room.]
Jimmy: NO!!!!!
Principal Willoughby: And... [Libby enters the room.] Your new co-host!
Jimmy: NO!!!!!
Libby: Jimmy, calm down. We know that you want the show to educate people. We deeply and genuinely respect that.
Jimmy: NO!!!!! ...You do?

Professor Calamitous, I Presume[edit]

The Egg-pire Strikes Back[edit]

Maximum Hugh[edit]

Jimmy: My dad's all thumbs and has two left feet.
Sheen: Cool! If your mom grows a beard, we could start a circus!

Mr. Wheezer: We won! And not a single injury! [drops the trophy]
Carl: Oh, my foot!
Mr. Wheezer: Oh, my back!
Carl & Mr. Wheezer: [crash into each other] Ow! My head!
Mr. Wheezer: Oh, I think I got a bone spurt.
Carl: Ooh! Leg cramp!
Mr. Wheezer: My kidneys are on FIRE! [faints]

Hugh: Now, remember, son - there's no "I" in "team," you know what I mean?
Jimmy: You mean we should sublimate our differences for the good of our combined effort?
Hugh: What? No, no, I mean there's no letter "i" in the word "team." There's never a wrong time for a spelling lesson, son!

Sleepless in Retroville[edit]

Hugh: I remember my first sleepover. The games, the practical jokes, the crying for my mommy.
Judy: Hugh, that was our honeymoon.
Hugh: Yeah, I know.
Carl: And I brought a video of Larry the Lovesick Llama.

Sheen: Who said anything about going to sleep? What are we, a bunch of babies? Come on, I'm gonna stay up all night! Party! Party! Par.... [falls asleep]
Jimmy: I can't delete the pizza! The screen's frozen!

[After the Pizza Monster wakes up from a nightmare screaming.]
Pizza Monster's Wife: Honey, what is it?
Pizza Monster: Oh, I had the most horrible dream. There were 3 terrible children, a tubby one, a maniac one and one with a giant head!
Pizza Monster's Wife: I told you, dear. There's no such thing as children, now go back to sleep.
[Both go back to sleep in their pizza box beds.]

Make Room for Daddy-O[edit]

Jimmy: I have to bring back the old Dad, and I've gotta do it fast!
Sheen: I smell a Brain Blast!
Carl: Oh, is that what that is? [snorts] I thought it might be the cheese ball I've been carrying around since I was 3. [He shows a rotten cheese ball.] I call him Cheesy.
[Jimmy makes a face, then begins thinking.]
Jimmy: Think, think, think...!
[A memory of Hugh catching Jimmy is shown.]
Jimmy: Brain Blast!
Sheen: Told ya. [Eats Carl's cheese ball]

Beach Party Mummy[edit]

Carl: Guys, we can't leave school! It's ditching! It'll go on our permanent record!
Sheen: Carl, how many times to I have to tell you? Your permanent record is just a myth! Like the Loch Ness monster or North Dakota!

Cindy: [to Libby] Do we have to refer to you as "Queen Libby" from now on?
Libby: [giggles] Of course not! "Your Mighty Fine Royal Fabulousness" will do.

Sheen: [to Jimmy] Where do you learn all this stuff?
Jimmy: That I learned at the library.
Sheen: Ohh. And the library is a...?

External links[edit]