The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius/Season 1

From Wikiquote
Jump to navigation Jump to search

The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius Season 1


When Pants Attack[edit]

Judy: James Issac Neutron! How many times have I told you to pick up your pants?!
Jimmy: Well, I know just the dog who can answer that, mom. [Snaps fingers, Goddard comes out] Goddard, access maternal reprehend data, cross reference: pants.
[Goddard begins replaying the times Judy asked Jimmy to pick up his pants.]
Judy: [onscreen] Jimmy! Pick up your pants, please? -- Uh, Jimmy? Pick up your pants. -- Pick up your pants. -- Pants. -- Jimmy! -- Jimmy? -- Jimmy? -- Pick 'em up. -- Jimmy! -- Pick up... -- Pick up... -- Jimmy? -- ...Your pants!
[Screen says "54 times to date".]
Judy: I rest my case.

[Cindy presents her report with Jimmy unintentionally joining in.]
Cindy: Origami: the ancient art of Japanese paper folding. I will be making the most difficult of all origami structures; a snow monkey.
Jimmy: Actually, paper folding originated in China --
Cindy: Riding a flying dragon --
Jimmy: In the second century A.D. --
Cindy: While drinking tea --
Jimmy: And was brought to Japan --
Cindy: On a ladder --
Jimmy: In the sixth century --
Miss Fowl: Cindy, I didn't know you and Jimmy were doing this report together.
Cindy: We're not!

Normal Boy[edit]

Sheen: [after Jimmy attempts to use a Brain Drain helmet on himself] Wow, look at him. He looks so... so similar.
Carl: Aw, don't worry, Jimmy. There's always next time.
Jimmy: [notices the shine on his inventions, speaking in a derpy-like voice] Shiny? Shiny! I like shiny!
Carl and Sheen: It worked!
Jimmy: Hey, have you guys seen my loopy dance? [singing] I'm loopy, I'm loopy, I'm loopy, loopy, loopy...
Carl: You know, this new Jimmy seems kinda stupid.
Sheen: Yeah, he's really messed up. [beat] I like him!
Carl: Me too!
Sheen: Can we keep him?

Miss Fowl: Okay, who can tell me the square root of 144? Bwaaak!
Jimmy: [raises hand] I know! Eleventy-six!
Miss Fowl: Well, no, I'm sorry, bwaak. That's wrong.
[All students gasp; Cindy raises her hand.]
Miss Fowl: Cindy?
Cindy: 12.
Miss Fowl: That's right, bwaak.
Cindy: YES!

Birth of a Salesman[edit]

[Jimmy is outside school, along with Carl, Sheen, Libby & Cindy.]
Jimmy: Ladies and gentlemen... and Cindy, I want to show you the greatest thing your eyes have ever beheld!
Carl: A llama?
Jimmy: No.
Carl: A baby llama?
Jimmy: [scoffs] No!
Carl: A baby llama with a little hat on?
Jimmy: [angerier] NO!
Cindy: An invention of yours that actually works? [She and Libby laugh.]
Jimmy: NO!!.. I mean...yes! I present to you... my latest neutronic invention ... [Presents three pieces of miniature books] ... Book Gum. why read a book when you can just chew the book instead?
Sheen: Wow, Jimmy, chewing a book.
Jimmy: Sheen, you don't actually chew a book. See, I reduced the contents of different books to gum form. You chew it, and you know it.
[He gives some gum to Sheen, who chews it.]
Sheen: Tastes... fishy. [starts quoting from Moby-Dick] "Call me Ishmael. Starbuck, it's the great white whale. I'll get you, Moby Dick!"
Cindy: Give me a piece of that. [Takes a piece and chews] Hmm... It tastes like fried chicken. [starts quoting from Gone with the Wind] "Oh, Ashley, Oh, Rhett. I don't know nothin' about birthin' no babies."
[Carl is about to taste a handful of gum pieces.]
Jimmy: Careful, Carl. It would be very dangerous to eat more than one at a time.
[Carl selects a piece.]
Carl: Mmm... William Shakespeare.
Jimmy: That might just be a little strong for you, Carl.
Carl: [quotes Romeo's monologue from Romeo and Juliet, during which Cindy rolls her eyes in amazement] "But soft, what light through yonder window breaks? It is the east and Juliet is the sun. See how she leans her cheek upon her hand. Oh, that I were a glove upon that hand that I might touch that cheek."

Jimmy: It's the good life, gentlemen. While the W.L. 3000 does all the work we're here enjoying a tall cold one.
Sheen: And plan our VIP trip to Retroland.
Sheen: What?
Carl: "Huzzah" some goofy way to say "COOL!"!
Man: What?!?
Willy: Goo-ood afternoon, sir. May I say you look absolutely f-f-fabulous? Ha-ha-ha, yes, I agree it is beautiful out, heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh...
Man: I don't want to buy nothin'.
Willy: "Buy"? Who said "buy"? I-I-I'd like to give you a piece of c-candy, absolutely free with no strings attached.
Man: Forget it.
Willy: You can never have enough ca-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-andy, sir.
Man: I can. And I DO! Good-bye.
[The man almost closes the door, but Willy blocks it.]
Willy: Y-yes, y-y-y-yes, this is a "g-good buy".
Man: [struggling to close the door] What part of "NO!" do you not understand?
Willy: [holds up Goddard] How about if I throw in this free-ee-ee-ee dog if you buy a box?
Man: Hmm... what kind of dog is he?
Willy: He's your kind of dog. C-congratulations.
[Willy gives Goddard to the man, takes his money and slams the door]
Man: [from inside the house] Hey, what does he ea-? Wha-? Wha-? Oh! OH! not on the carpet, yo-! Ooh... Are those lug nuts?

The Big Pinch[edit]

Jimmy: [sarcastic] Oh, I forgot about the ever popular mud-powered radio.
Cindy: And I forgot about your mud-powered brain!
Thomas Edison: Woo! That hovercar's a piece of work!
Jimmy: Thank you, Mr. Edison. You know, I achieved the upward thrust using strautium nitium-crusted fuel rods and titanium valuves.
Thomas Edison: Are you done? It's not that great, okay?

Jimmy: [mimicking Edison] Hey, you mangy canine, get away from there.
[Goddard barks]
Jimmy': [normal voice] Fooled you. It's just me, Goddard. See, I installed a voice transformer inside this walkie-talkie. Observe. [mimicking Edison] Whip-diddly-doo, everybody.
[Goddard whines]
Jimmy: [normal voice] Aw, Goddard, this is going to help me break up Edison and Miss Fowl. Now, come on pretend it's a nice, crunchy lug nut.
[Goddard belches]
Jimmy: Good boy. Good boy. Now here's the plan...

Granny Baby[edit]

[Granny sits across from the Jimmy Dummy, trying to open a small bottle, as the real Jimmy enters with the Tonic behind his back.]
Granny: Good morning. [points to the dummy] I was just telling you over there about my deviated spatchum. On cold mornings it rattles like the Tin Man throwing up a hoagie full of wood screws
Jimmy: What’s in the bottle?
Granny: Tongue De-Furrer. Your tongue gets furry when you’re old. Sometimes I wake up it has chewing on it.
Jimmy: Let me open that for you. [Jimmy takes the bottle, turns his back - and when he turns back granny’s medicine is GLOWING and his flask is empty.] I think you’ll feel much better and quieter - after you drink this. [She up-ends it and smacks her lips distastefully.]
Granny: Tastes funny. Of course, what do I know – after sixty your sense of taste completely disapp- [Granny transform into a baby]
Jimmy: Granny?!

[Jimmy picks up bottles of DANGEROUS CHEMICALS (labeled as such). Cindy looks at a shelf, carrying Granny, who holds a rattle.]
Granny Baby: I’m bored! Make a funny face and let me hit you with a rattle.
Cindy: No.[Granny Baby cries.] Okay, okay! [Cindy does a funny face and Granny Baby hits her in a face with her rattle.]
Granny Baby: It's fun hitting you. Ha ha ha ha!
Jimmy: [whispering] Granny Granny quiet.
Guy: Did that baby just talk?
Jimmy: No. Ha ha, why? Everyone know babies can't talk.
Granny Baby: [To People] That's right. 'Cos if we could the Videotubbies’d became the subway, it’d make their head aerials spin. Ha ha ha ha!
[The people gasp. Jimmy and Cindy running from the clamoring mob.]

Time Is Money[edit]

Judy: [about Sheen & Carl] And what are they doing here? The big one is odd and the thin one is a weirdo.
Carl: Hey, you can't insult us like that!
Hugh: [tosses Carl and Sheen a gold brick] Here you go, get yourself something nice.
Sheen: Sure they can! [turns to Carl] Let's go, odd guy!
Carl: [snorts] You got it, weirdo!

Sheen: I liked the part about the medulla oblongata. I don't know what it means, but I love the way it sounds! [waves his UltraLord action figure at Carl] Back or I shall slay thee with my medulla oblongata!

Raise the Oozy Scab[edit]

Cindy: What kind of dunderhead would want to talk to a bunch of stupid fish?
Carl: I wanna talk to fish! I wanna talk to fish!! [snatches the microphone out of Jimmy's hand and sees a fish] Oh, hey there, little fella! Do you like Fish Snack 'Ems? They're made from fish like you, only chopped up into little bite sized pieces and deep fried in burning oil! [the fish screams and swims away]

Cindy: [about Jimmy] Throw him in the brig!
Jimmy: It'll take a lot more than ravenous hunger to turn my men against me! [puts fists on hips and stands proudly] Tell her, boys!
Sheen: I'll get some rope!
Carl: I'll hold him down!

I Dream of Jimmy[edit]

Jimmy: Carl, you're asleep. This is a dream.
Carl: Don't be silly. If this was a dream, could I do... [pulls a brain out from his head] this?
Jimmy: That's the only time you can do it! Carl, you're asleep, there are llamas in the classroom! Libby rowed to school with a plastic leg!!
Carl: Her paddle broke.

Jimmy: [observing Carl's genius state in his dream] When Carl's asleep, he dreams he's a genius like me.
Cindy: Like you? Please, you can't even spell your own name!
[Jimmy looks down at his school desk, seeing apparently botched attempts at spelling "Jimmy"]
Carl: Now I need a dummy who will volunteer.
[Everyone points at Jimmy]
Jimmy: But I'm not dumb. I'm a genius!
[Everyone laughs]
Cindy: [giggling] If you're so smart, what's the square root of a flexnart?
Jimmy: That doesn't make any sense!
Carl: The square root of a flexnart is a cupful of boogers.
Libby: [dreamily] He did that all in his head!

Jimmy On Ice[edit]

Hugh: [after he and his posse mistake Jimmy and Godard in the distance for a caribou] There's gonna be caribou chili tonight boys.
All Three Men: [chanting] Ugh lugh lugh yeah! Ugh lugh lugh yeah! Ooooooooooh..... CARIBOU!

Judy: [to Jimmy] Sweetie, eat your caribou before it gets hard and icy.

Battle of the Band[edit]

Sheen: Hey! Hey! What is this? I specifically requested dolphin-safe donuts! I refuse to perform until all of my ridiculous demands are satisfied!

[While Jimmy, Carl & Sheen are fighting with each other.]
Jimmy: Wait a minute. Sheen, Carl! What are we doing?
Sheen: Well, I was about to strangle Carl.
Carl: Yeah, and I was about to slap Sheen on the back of the head.

See Jimmy Run[edit]

Ms. Fowl: [after Jimmy invisibly steals her sandwich] Well I....Who took my sandwich? [spots a squirrel] So that's your game, is it? well, Mr. I'm-Too-Good-For-Acorns, how'd you like a nice detention?

Trading Faces[edit]

Jimmy: [as Cindy] Do you think I spent enough hours on my hair this morning? Hey, everybody, look at my ankles! When'll I ever get a pair of pants the right length? [laughs] Who knows?

[After Jimmy is put back in his body.]
Jimmy: [smiling] I can't see my ankles.
Carl: [screaming] Oh, no! He's blind!
Jimmy: Uh, no, Carl. I have my own pants back!

The Phantom of Retroland[edit]

Carl: Sheen, the phantom of Retroland is gonna tear us limb from limb and eat us! Say something!
Sheen: You ever notice how Jimmy's hair is like one of those gum massager things? It's all swirly and... What?!

Jimmy: Glad you could make it, Sheen. How did you sneak out?
Sheen: Oh, I just told my grandma that I had to go to a deserted theme park to be eaten by a maniac. She told me to wear clean underwear.

My Son, the Hamster[edit]

Sheen: Jimmy! You're like a hamster! Or a gerbil! Or a dolphin or something!

Judy: [to Hugh] Why don't you spend some quality time with Jimmy? It could be a special Father-Son day.
Hugh: That's a great idea! I used to have those with my Aunty all the time! Only we called them Aunty-Nephew days, but it's probably the same basic, uh, idea. We could go to the park, we could, uh... eat cheese! We could even go to Retroland! I love those zig-zaggy lines! They're so ... not ... straight.
Judy: [sighs] Oh, Hugh.

Hall Monster[edit]

Cindy: [to Jimmy] Okay, Neutron, you're outta control! I'm making a citizen's arrest!
Sheen: I want a public defender!
Libby: I... I want my music!
Carl: [cries] I want my mommy! [whimpers and then smiles] And some fudge!

Jimmy: [to Carl] You've exceeded the number of llama stickers on your lunchbox!
Carl: [nervously] I know...but I... I have a special permit.

Hypno Birthday to You[edit]

Sheen: [rolls dice] Seven! [chuckles] Your llama is sucked into a volcanic sinkhole, where flesh-eating bats will nip at his screaming face. [eats popcorn]
Carl: Sheen, there aren't any volcanic sinkholes in Llama's Day Out!
Sheen: Maybe that explains why I'm not having fun. [eats popcorn]
Jimmy: [Enters] Hi, Carl. I ran out of chemicals mid-experiment and I know you got a chemistry set for your birthday?
Sheen: [rolls dice] Eleven!
Carl: Hey, you can use my chemistry set, Jim. [He gets his Mama's Boy chemestry set down from a shelf.] Oh, the potato's not included.
Jimmy: Uh, that's okay. I assume it comes with a few cc's of ethyl mercaptin?
Carl: Uh... no.
Jimmy: Well, I can work around that. How about some, uh... dimercural sulfonative?
Carl: Uh... yeah...? No.
Jimmy: Tritium nitrate?
Carl: I've got salt.
Jimmy: Oh, Pukin' Pluto! How's a guy supposed to make a four-dimensional Hypercube molecule without access to the complete spectrum of inorganic chemicals?!
Sheen: Welcome to my nightmare. [eats popcorn]
[Jimmy rolls his eyes.]
Carl: [Walks over carrying a leaflet] Here you go, Jimmy. Check out this leaflet from inside the box.
Jimmy: [reading leaflet] "Also try our Ultra-Deluxe model. Contains every element from aluminum to zirconium." Now, that's what I'm talkin' about! [suddenly blue, sighs] Aw, who am I kidding? I don't have any money, and my birthday's three months away.
Sheen: [eats popcorn] Ah, quit procrastinating, Carl, for I'm not -- forget it! I'm rolling for you! [rolls one die and piece of popcorn] One! [chuckles] And Carl's llama falls down. Down into the sulfurous mud pit! How the snake god will be pleased!
Carl: Hey, how could you roll the one if there are two dice?
Sheen: Huh? Oh. Yeah... [Picks up the die and popcorn; suddenly grabs throat and chokes.] Someone get me the jaws of life!

Krunch Time[edit]

Sam: [as Jimmy is hiding out in the Candy Bar to avoid the mob of people] Well, look who's here. Mr. "I'm-going-to-invent-the-best-candy-in-the-world-and-put-the-Candy-Bar-out-of-business".
Jimmy: I'm sorry, Sam. I didn't mean to. I didn't know my candy would be that popular.
Sam: That's what the guy who invented underpants said! Anyways, you better skedaddle. That angry mob's gonna be here any moment.
Jimmy: How do you know that?
Sam: I called them. What do you expect? I've gone broke here! [crowd starts chanting "Candy! Candy!" outside the Candy Bar] Uh-oh. Rhythmic chanting. That's a bad sign, yeah.
Jimmy: Oh, what am i gonna do? Think, think, think.

Sheen: Hey Jimmy, that last batch was delicious! [electrocuted] Also, incredibly painful. [electrocuted] Hey, do you guys smell smoke? [electrocuted] I can't feel my face! [electrocuted] Why does everything look blue? [electrocuted]

Substitute Creature[edit]

Libby: What's that supposed to be?
Sheen: The rare Punching Plant of Melbore 9, as seen in UltraLord epsiode 64, "Attack of the Salad Fixin's"!
Libby: Looks like a boxing glove glued to a fern, if you ask me.
Sheen: Well, nobody asked you! Anyway, what have you come up with that's so wonderful?
Libby: I researched plants' responses to musical stimuli. This one got two hours of classic R&B a day while this one got two hours of Yodelling to the Oldies.
Sheen [pointing to the one that got two hours of "Yodelling to the Oldies"]: That one looks dead.
Libby [shakes her head sadly]: It never had a chance.

Jimmy: I can fix him! I just need to get another toaster!
Cindy: Uh-huh.
Jimmy: And you guys need to... uh, get that DNA Ray out of Miss Fowl's stomach. Good luck, see ya, bye!
Libby: We have to what?
Sheen: You heard him. We have to make our teacher toss the lunch monkey. We need a bucket, an umbrella and whatever they were serving for lunch in the caferteria on Thursday! Goddard, hit it!
[Goddard plays town-saving music]

Safety First[edit]

Sheen: Hey, Jimmy, I've been meaning to ask you something.
Jimmy: I know, I know. Why am I carrying two lunches? Because of that bully Terry Finster! This way, after he steals mine, I still have something to eat!
Sheen: Actually, I was going to ask you who would win in a fight between Big Foot and a Komodo Dragon, but your question's good too.

Hugh: [to Jimmy] Just got a phone call from Terry's mom! Did you two have a little spat-a-roo?
Judy: Hugh, the talk?
Hugh: [clears throat] Once upon on time, a boy sparrow said to a girl sparrow, "Hey, nice feathers! Can I buy you some millet?" Well, the girl sparrow...
Jimmy: You know what, dad? I would really love to hear the rest, but I'm having a small emergency, bye!
Hugh: And when he got to her nest, he was alarmed to find out that her mother was a cantankerous old crow!
Judy: Hugh!

Crime Sheen Investigation[edit]

Sheen: You've gotta help me, Jimmy! If you don't, I'll have to ask complete idiots to help me and you know how unreliable they are!

Sheen: Don't feel bad, Jimmy. You tried your best. It just wasn't anywhere near good enough.

Journey to the Center of Carl[edit]

[The students call Jimmy after the Sick Patches dissolve into their skin.]
Cindy: Your sick patch dissolved into my skin, Nerdtron!
Sheen: Jimmy, my patch pulled a Houdini!
Libby: Cure me or face the consequences!
Jimmy: Okay, okay, settle down! I can fix it! Carl, Sheen, sneak out and meet me in the you-know-what.

Jimmy: We've reached our destination... [sniffs] the stomach.
Sheen: [seeing toys in the stomach acid] Man. [sniffs] Carl eats a lot of junk, doesn't he? Hey, Carl! You're supposed to play with the toys in The Silly Meals, not eat 'em!
Carl: I know, but they always look so colorful and chewy!

Aaughh!! Wilderness!![edit]

Hugh: Don't forget I was an Acorn Lad! I remember everything I ever learned like the song we used to sing! [singing] We are the Acorn Lads, something, something, the Acorn Lads.

Party at Neutron's[edit]

Hugh: Whoo-hoo! I can't believe it, Sugar-Booger! We're finally gonna get to see Ducks, the greatest musical ever made!
When you're a duck,
You're a duck all the way,
From the first time you quack
To the last egg you lay!
[Jimmy uses his Time Accelerator on him, speeding him up.]
When you're a duck
You will live in a blind.
With a little or long orange,
It's a fresh melon rind!
The Musical.
[Jimmy winks at the camera.]

Hugh: Let's get a move on, puddin'. Don't wanna miss the overture! [Sings, to the tune of Beethoven's 5th Symphony] Da-da-da-duuuuuck! Da-da-da-duuuuuck! [Continues singing]
Judy: Oh, Hugh. [To Jimmy] We'll be home around 11:30.
Hugh: Eh, Jimbo, you want us to... wake ya up when we get home and reenact the show?
Jimmy: thanks.
[Hugh exits.]

Ultra Sheen[edit]

Carl: Oh my favorite video game?" Oh no no it's too much pressure. "Ninja llamas in space?" Eh no. "Llama vs. Mega Dingo?" Eh... [gasps] Of coarse! "Llama palooza!" [sighs] Oh I love you most of all. [kisses the video game.]

Carl: Oh, yeah! I'm bad! I DEFEATED ULTRALOOOOOORRRRD!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Broadcast Blues[edit]

Principal Willoughby: Jimmy, I'd like you to meet the new producer of Science with Jimmy!
[Cindy enters the room.]
Jimmy: NO!!!!!
Principal Willoughby: And... [Libby enters the room.] Your new co-host!
Jimmy: NO!!!!!
Libby: Jimmy, calm down. We know that you want the show to educate people. We deeply and genuinely respect that.
Jimmy: NO!!!!! ...You do?

Maximum Hugh[edit]

Mr. Wheezer: We won! And not a single injury! [drops the trophy]
Carl: Oh, my foot!
Mr. Wheezer: Oh, my back!
Carl & Mr. Wheezer: [crash into each other] Ow! My head!
Mr. Wheezer: Oh, I think I got a bone spurt.
Carl: Ooh! Leg cramp!
Mr. Wheezer: My kidneys are on FIRE! [faints]

Hugh: Now, remember, son - there's no "I" in "team," you know what I mean?
Jimmy: You mean we should sublimate our differences for the good of our combined effort?
Hugh: What? No, no, I mean there's no letter "i" in the word "team." There's never a wrong time for a spelling lesson, son!

Sleepless in Retroville[edit]

Hugh: I remember my first sleepover. The games, the practical jokes, the crying for my mommy.
Judy: Hugh, that was our honeymoon.
Hugh: Yeah, I know.
Carl: And I brought a video of Larry the Lovesick Llama.

Jimmy: [after a nightmare] Oh, it was only a nightmare. An anchovy, clam and peanut butter induced nightmare. [sees his parents running down the stairs until Hugh wakes up screaming]
Hugh: Whew! That was a doozy.
[After Carl wakes up from a nightmare screaming from mutant pizza]
Carl: Bad dream! Bad dream! [sees Sheen getting attacked by Pizza Monster]
Sheen: [screams] Phew. I guess it was all just a dream. Hey Carl, I-- [But Carl is nowhere to be seen. He picks up Pizza Monster in two hands, making the Pizza Monster terrified.]
[After the Pizza Monster wakes up from a nightmare screaming.]
Pizza Monster's Wife: Honey, what is it?
Pizza Monster: Oh, I had the most horrible dream. There were 3 terrible children, a tubby one, a maniac one and one with a giant head!
Pizza Monster's Wife: I told you, dear. There's no such thing as children, now go back to sleep.
[Both go back to sleep in their pizza box beds.]

Make Room for Daddy-O[edit]

Jimmy: I have to bring back the old Dad, and I've gotta do it fast!
Sheen: I smell a Brain Blast!
Carl: Oh, is that what that is? [snorts] I thought it might be the cheese ball I've been carrying around since I was 3. [He shows a rotten cheese ball.] I call him Cheesy.
[Jimmy makes a face, then begins thinking.]
Jimmy: Think, think, think...!
[A memory of Hugh catching Jimmy is shown.]
Jimmy: Brain Blast!
Sheen: Told ya. [Eats Carl's cheese ball]

Beach Party Mummy[edit]

Carl: Guys, we can't leave school! It's ditching! It'll go on our permanent record!
Sheen: Carl, how many times to I have to tell you? Your permanent record is just a myth! Like the Loch Ness monster or North Dakota!

Sheen: [to Jimmy] Where do you learn all this stuff?
Jimmy: That I learned at the library.
Sheen: Ohh. And the library is a...?

External links[edit]