Ice Age: Collision Course

Ice Age: Collision Course is a 2016 American 3D computer-animated family adventure comedy film directed by Mike Thurmeier and Galen T. Chu and written by Michael J. Wilson. It is the fifth installment in the Ice Age film series and a sequel to Continental Drift.

The film debuted at the Sydney Film Festival on June 19, 2016, and was released in the United States and Canada on July 22, 2016 by 20th Century Fox in 2D and 3D.

Kiss your Ice Goodbye.(taglines)

Sid

• What is wrong with me? Everybody has somebody and all I've got is my boyish good looks and this Mariachi band.
• [tied with Granny after doing yoga] Could you help me please? My nose is dangerously close to my butt.

Julian

• Whoo! We look so cool! Whoa! [trips and falls]
• Manny, the only thing I want is a life with Peaches. And to prove myself to you. So okay, two things, I want two things. Do you really think I'd waste the only chance I have left?

Neil deBuck Weasel

• [Opening line] The universe – a vast expanse of space and matter. It includes all that we see, and all that we know. Since the beginning of time, we have wondered how it came to be. A gloriously orchestrated plan? A chance series of events? Or something much, much dumber?
• [Closing line] Mars – The Red Planet. Cold, dry, inhospitable to life. But billions and billions of years ago, Mars looked like this. There were lakes, rivers, oceans – the perfect conditions for life to form. So, what happened? Why was life unable to take hold? Where did the water go? We may never know.

Dialogue

Sid: I need to ask you something. Will you marry–

Francine: Sid, I'm going to stop you right there. I'm breaking up with you!

Sid: What!? But I planned our future! Our wedding, our kids, "Mommy!" Our burial plots–

Beaver: [digging up two holes for their burials] How you doin'?

Sid: I even hired a band! [Sid's Mariachi band plays music] No, no! Not yet! [Sid's Mariachi band stops]

Francine: Are you crazy? We have only had one date. It lasted fourteen minutes!

Sid: Yes. But it felt like twenty. [shows her a ring in his seashell]

Francine: Ugh! I can't! A ring? I mean I like the ring, but no. I can't, you're too clingy.

Sid: [zoom out to show Francine piggybacking Sid on her back] How is this clingy?

---

Sid: Hey, it sounds like it's slowing down. Yup, it's definitely over. [A meteor crashes in front of him, which obscures smoke on the screen. The smoke clears. Ellie turns Sid around, revealing him to be half burnt] Except for that one... [The screen fades to black]

Manny: We might wanna think about moving underground for a while.

---

Buck: Oh, right on the spleen! Utterly useless, but totally hurts.

Diego: Hey, Buck! Welcome back, buddy.

Shira: Wait, this half-a-snack is a dinosaur whisperer?

Buck: And expert salsa dancer. [scats] I have one eye, but all my original teeth. Would you like to count them? [shows his teeth]

Shira: No thank you.

Buck: And this must be– Nectarine?

Peaches: Um, Peaches.

Buck: Semantics my dear. I am deeply honored.

Julian: Sweet eye-patch. Very gangster.

Buck: Thank you! [to Peaches] I like this kid.

---

[Crash and Eddie keep drumming all the time, Manny takes the drum sticks away]

Manny: Do you mind?

Crash: Boy, he really sucks the fun out of everything, doesn't he?

Eddie: Funsucker!

---

Buck: No worries, because I've got a plan.

Manny: Really, to stop an asteroid?

Buck: [shows the tablets on the prophecy] Look, the last two asteroids have pummeled the earth in the same spot, and it's about to happen again. We've got to go there and see what's attracting the asteroid. Once we know why it's coming, we can figure out how to send it somewhere else.

Granny: That plan is so dumb, I wish it had a face so I could smack it.

Manny: Let me get this straight, instead of running away from a deadly asteroid, you want us to run directly towards it.

Buck: I know it sounds suboptimal. But the good news is, it'll kill us no matter where we went!

Diego: Well, that's reassuring.

Manny: Okay. Even if we get to the crash site, how are we supposed to change what is literally written in stone?

Buck: Ah, my cynical friend, the dinos were wiped off the face of the Earth, but some escaped. They changed their fate and we can change ours too! Who's with me?

[the Herd all look at each other, then quickly huddle in]

Manny: So what do you think?

Ellie: Honestly, I'm worried the weasel's right.

Buck: [in a high-pitched voice] No, don't listen to the weasel. He's a raving loon! [normal voice] Sorry, I just love playing devil's advocate. [singsong] And looking fabulous!

Diego: Well, Buck has saved our lives before, right?

Shira: But what if he can't this time?

Peaches: I don't know what to believe, but I'm afraid our lives will be over before they begin.

Manny: Okay, I guess we're in.

Crash and Eddie: [salute] Crash and Eddie reporting for duty!

Eddie: Haha! "Duty". [he and Crash laugh]

Buck: Excellent!

---

[Sid removes a crystal, causing Geotopia to soon crumble]

Sid: Whoopsies!

Shangri Llama: No! Oaf! Simpleton! Nincompoop!

Sid: You talking to her or me?

Shangri Llama: That wall was the one thing keeping us young. Now we're all doomed! Doooooooomed!! And now I think I have a fever. Thank you so much, doofus!

Brooke: Hey, easy there Llama! This is the doofus of my dreams. He meant well.

Shangri Llama: Oh, he meant well. Who cares?!

Peaches: So much for serenity.

Shangri Llama: 300 years of peace and harmony undone by one colossally, incredibly, stupendously stupid SLOTH!!!

[The Shangri Llama, the Geotopians, Teddy, and Brooke immediately turn to their real aged selves]

Sid: Oh, Brooke.

Granny: Wow! You guys got old. Whatever we had, it's over.

Teddy: That's what happens when you date a cougar. [starts crying]

Sid: I'm really sorry, Mr. Llama.

Shangri Llama: "Sorry". Sorry? "Sorry" doesn't fix the wall now, does it, you little– [screams at a high-pitch] I need a bubble bath or a massage. Who knows acupuncture? I need to let my anger out. Let it out!!!! I've been pent out too long. Aaaahhhh! I want to hit something. Someone give me their face.

---

Gavin: That's more like it, Roger. Now finish him.

Buck: No wait! Wait, you don't understand. You see that? If that asteroid hits, we all die.

Gavin: [mocking] "If it hits, we all die." [cries, then laughs] That's where you're wrong. See, while you run for your mammal lives, we'll be high in the sky, cruising above it all.

[In Buck's head...]

Neil deBuck Weasel: That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard!

Gavin: We'll be as safe as those little birdies. [one meteor hits a bird] Lucky shot.

[More meteors hit more birds]

Gavin: Very lucky shot?

[A giant meteor hits Earth]

Roger: I knew it. I was right. There's no paradise.

Gertie: WHAT!? I'm too young to go extinct! Ahh!

Buck: She gets it, now please! We haven't got much time.

Gavin: What are you waiting for? Kill him!

Roger: [steps in] No Dad, I won't let you! Do you want to know what I love about our family? That we're alive. There are more important things than your pride right now. If you care about us, you should not kill him. You should help him, Dad.

Gertie: [in tears] Pop, I hate to say this, but my freaky little brother maybe be right.

Buck: As a father, I would work with my worst enemy, to ensure a brighter future for my little one.

[Gavin agrees to work with Buck, and the dino birds fly the crystal to put in the volcano]

Buck: Reinforcements have arrived!

---

Sid: You sure you can't come with us?

Brooke: Oh Sidney, I wish I could. But we both know this is for the best. You've got your whole life in front of you. Besides– I'll have Granny to keep me company.

Sid: You're staying too?

Granny: Are you kiddin'? This place is great! Tonight's the big talent show, and tomorrow, "Naked Bingo"!

Teddy: You comin', Gladys? I ain't gettin' any younger. Whoo!

Gladys: What? I can't hear you!

Teddy: What? I can't hear you.

Gladys: What?! I can't hear you!

Brooke: [turns to Sid and gives him a rock slab with a sketch of herself] You'll always be my one true love. Here.

Sid: [takes the rock slab from Brooke's hands] Woah. Hold on. [draws himself on the rock slab and shows Brooke]

Brooke: It looks just like you.

Sid: Now we'll be with each other forever.

---

Teddy: What you need is more fiber.

Geotopia Shovelmouth: He's right. [a small crystal from the asteroid drops into the tub; it sinks onto the cracked spot, making bubbles fill up and to make all of them young again]

Shangri Llama: (Huh?) Oh. (What the–?) Ha! Hahaha! Shanghai Llama's back on top baby! [touches his beard while the Geotopia beaver returns to normal] Ooh, ahh, mmm.

Teddy: [his old man beard is gone, and he returns to normal] Gladys?

Granny: [now becomes young, beautiful and fancy] Well, hello, Teddy Bear!

Teddy: [looks surprised, his ears make heart-shaped ears] Mmm-hmm.

Granny: Hot tubbin' just got a whole lot hotter. [Teddy looks at Granny, while the Shangri Llama comes out of the water]

Shangri Llama: Amazing! It's like some kind of "Fountain of Never Getting Old"! [plants and bushes turn young again] Well, we can workshop the name later. [flowers bloom and turn young again, Brooke also turns young again too, she sighs]

---

Peaches: [nervous to marry Julian] I don't know. I don't know! What am I gonna do?

Ellie: Sweetie, listen to me. This is normal, okay? Everyone gets nervous.

Manny: What's going on? What happened?

Peaches: It's just– I can't go! How can I go? I don't wanna leave you guys.

Manny: Hey, fuzzball. Remember the first time that we played hockey? You were so afraid to get on the ice because it was slippery. Remember how I held you up while you started to skate? And when I knew you were ready, I let you go.

Peaches: Aw, Dad.

Manny: I know you're ready, now you have to let go.

Ellie: I always knew it would take someone very special, to match your spirit, and you found him. Just like I did. It's your time, sweetie. See the world, chase your dreams.

Manny: And whenever you decide to come back, we'll be here, okay?

---

Manny: [as he, Sid, Brooke, and Ellie walk out together] Sid? I never thought I'd say this, but you did a great job on the wedding. I owe you big time, pal.

Sid: You sure do. [takes out a leaf] Here's my bill.

Manny: What?

Sid: Father of the bride pays for the wedding. It's a tradition I just invented.

Manny: Wait a minute. This is ridiculous. Look what you're charging for flowers!

Sid: Flowers ain't cheap.

Manny: No, they're free! We're in a forest! This bill is outrageous!

Cosmic Scrat-tastrophe

Manny: Hey, look, shooting stars.

Sid: Ooh, quick, make a wish, make a wish! You got to make a wish–! [one of the meteors catapults him on top of a tree]

Manny: Wow, my wish came true.

Sid: I'm okay! [is burnt by flames from the meteor]

Diego: Mine too.

Sid: [off-screen] Oh, I think I burnt my marshmallows.

Scrat: Spaced Out

[last lines, Neil deBuck Weasel talks about the black hole]

Neil deBuck Weasel: The black hole. No piece of cosmic garbage is too small, too insignificant, or too pathetic to escape its mighty– [Scrat and his acorn finally escape from the black hole] Ah, never mind.

[As Scrat hugs his acorn, The Black hole (in a smaller form) reappears sucking the acorn away and disappears, Scrat looked shocked, then he screams in frustration as he floats in space]

Taglines

• Kiss your Ice Goodbye.
• They are going out with a bang.
• One Small Step. One Giant Mess.
• Astro Nut.
• Brace Yourself.
• Beauty and the Sloth.
• Laugh Like There is No Tomorrow.

Cast

• Ray Romano — Manny
• John Leguizamo — Sid
• Denis Leary — Diego
• Adam Devine — Julian
• Jesse Tyler Ferguson — The Shangri Llama
• Max Greenfield — Roger
• Jessie J — Brooke
• Nick Offerman — Gavin
• Keke Palmer — Peaches
• Josh Peck — Eddie
• Simon Pegg — Buck, Pythagoras Buck, Robo-Buck
• Seann William Scott — Crash
• Wanda Sykes — Gladys
• J. Lo — Shira
• Queen Latifah — Ellie
• Stephanie Beatriz — Gertie
• Neil deGrasse Tyson — Neil deBuck Weasel
• Lilly Singh — Misty and Bubbles
• Michael T. Strahan — Teddy
• Chris Wedge — Scrat

External Links

• Media related to Ice Age: Collision Course on Wikimedia Commons