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November 30

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Quotes of the day from previous years:

2004
The art of being wise is the art of knowing what to overlook. ~ William James
2005
Hello. My name is Iñigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die. ~ Mandy Patinkin (born 30 November 1952) as "Inigo Montoya" in The Princess Bride
2006
It is a good thing for an uneducated man to read books of quotations. Bartlett's Familiar Quotations is an admirable work, and I studied it intently. The quotations when engraved upon the memory give you good thoughts. They also make you anxious to read the authors and look for more. ~ Winston Churchill (born 30 November 1874).
  • proposed by Fys
2007
The truth is, when all is said and done, one does not teach a subject, one teaches a student how to learn it. ~ Jacques Barzun (born November 30, 1907)
2008
The one thing that unifies men in a given age is not their individual philosophies but the dominant problem that these philosophies are designed to solve. ~ Jacques Barzun
2009
It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world, and moral courage so rare. ~ Mark Twain (born 30 November 1835)
2010
When a great genius appears in the world the dunces are all in confederacy against him. ~ Jonathan Swift
2011
A sound heart is a safer guide than an ill-trained conscience. ~ Mark Twain
2012
Satire is a sort of glass, wherein beholders do generally discover everybody's face but their own.
~ Jonathan Swift ~
2013
Although men are accused of not knowing their own weakness, yet perhaps as few know their own strength. It is in men as in soils, where sometimes there is a vein of gold, which the owner knows not of.
~ Jonathan Swift ~
2014
Proper words in proper places, make the true definition of a style.
~ Jonathan Swift ~
2015
If you will not fight for the right when you can easily win without bloodshed; if you will not fight when your victory will be sure and not too costly; you may come to the moment when you will have to fight with all the odds against you and only a precarious chance of survival. There may even be a worse case. You may have to fight when there is no hope of victory, because it is better to perish than to live as slaves.
~ Winston Churchill ~
2016
Laws are like Cobwebs which may catch small Flies, but let Wasps and Hornets break through. But in Oratory the greatest Art is to hide Art.
~ Jonathan Swift ~
2017
Vision is the art of seeing things invisible.
~ Jonathan Swift ~
2018
The citizen who thinks he sees that the commonwealth's political clothes are worn out, and yet holds his peace and does not agitate for a new suit, is disloyal; he is a traitor. That he may be the only one who thinks he sees this decay, does not excuse him; it is his duty to agitate anyway, and it is the duty of the others to vote him down if they do not see the matter as he does.
~ Mark Twain ~
2019
I never wonder to see men wicked, but I often wonder to see them not ashamed.
~ Jonathan Swift ~
2020
Reasoning will never make a man correct an ill opinion, which by reasoning he never acquired…
~ Jonathan Swift ~
2021
There is nothing in this world constant, but inconstancy.
~ Jonathan Swift ~
2022
I can discover no political evil in suffering bullies, sharpers, and rakes, to rid the world of each other by a method of their own; where the law hath not been able to find an expedient.
~ Jonathan Swift ~
2023
Surely one of the best rules in conversation is, never to say a thing which any of the company can reasonably wish we had rather left unsaid; nor can there anything be well more contrary to the ends for which people meet together, than to part unsatisfied with each other or themselves.
~ Jonathan Swift ~
2024
Rank or add further suggestions…

Quotes by people born this day, already used as QOTD:

  • He gave it for his opinion, that whoever could make two ears of corn, or two blades of grass, to grow upon a spot of ground where only one grew before, would deserve better of mankind, and do more essential service to his country, than the whole race of politicians put together. ~ Jonathan Swift

The Quote of the Day (QOTD) is a prominent feature of the Wikiquote Main Page. Thank you for submitting, reviewing, and ranking suggestions!

Ranking system
4 : Excellent – should definitely be used. (This is the utmost ranking and should be used by any editor for only one quote at a time for each date.)
3 : Very Good – strong desire to see it used.
2 : Good – some desire to see it used.
1 : Acceptable – but with no particular desire to see it used.
0 : Not acceptable – not appropriate for use as a quote of the day.
An averaging of the rankings provided to each suggestion produces it’s general ranking in considerations for selection of Quote of the Day. The selections made are usually chosen from the top ranked options existing on the page, but the provision of highly ranked late additions, especially in regard to special events (most commonly in regard to the deaths of famous people, or other major social or physical occurrences), always remain an option for final selections.
Thank you for participating!

Suggestions

[edit]

When plugged in, the least elaborate computer can be relied on to work to the fullest extent of its capacity. The greatest mind cannot be relied on for the simplest thing; its variability is its superiority. ~ Jacques Barzun

  • 3 InvisibleSun 03:25, 19 November 2006 (UTC)
  • 2 because I have trouble working out exactly what he's trying to say. Fys. “Ta fys aym”. 23:15, 24 November 2006 (UTC)
  • 1 Zarbon 17:47, 22 April 2008 (UTC)
  • 3 Lyle 16:01, 6 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 2 Ningauble 19:32, 26 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 2 Kalki 02:42, 27 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 2 Antiquary 13:19, 29 November 2008 (UTC)

Criticism will need an injection of humility — that is, a recognition of its role as ancillary to the arts, needed only occasionally in a temporary capacity. Since the critic exists only for introducing and explaining, he must be readily intelligible; he has no special vocabulary: criticism is in no way a science or a system. ~ Jacques Barzun

  • 3 InvisibleSun 03:25, 19 November 2006 (UTC)
  • 2. Fys. “Ta fys aym”. 23:15, 24 November 2006 (UTC)
  • 1 Zarbon 17:47, 22 April 2008 (UTC)
  • 2 Ningauble 19:32, 26 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 2 Kalki 02:42, 27 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 3 Antiquary 13:19, 29 November 2008 (UTC)

Old age is like learning a new profession. And not one of your own choosing. ~ Jacques Barzun

  • 3 InvisibleSun 06:41, 29 November 2007 (UTC)
  • 1 Zarbon 17:47, 22 April 2008 (UTC)
  • 3 Lyle 16:02, 6 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 1 Ningauble 19:32, 26 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 2 Kalki 02:42, 27 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 3 Antiquary 13:19, 29 November 2008 (UTC)

I have always been — I think any student of history almost inevitably is — a cheerful pessimist. ~ Jacques Barzun

A soldier's first duty is to obey, otherwise you might as well do away with soldiering. ~ Albert Kesselring (born November 30)

  • 4 because this is one of my three alltime favorite quotes. A soldier is empty without his order, which defines him. And a true soldier is only a soldier if he is disciplined and furthermore, loyal to the bitter end. Loyalty and obedience goes hand in hand as a foundation of creating the principle for which I believe strongly, the principle of the soldier. Zarbon 04:01, 18 April 2008 (UTC)
    • SOURCE: The Nuremberg Interviews by Leon Goldensohn, Robert Gellately - History - 2004 - Page 322
  • 1 This is exactly the kind of mentality that fueled the holocaust. Let he who has no conscience obey for obedience's sake. Lyle 17:30, 10 October 2008 (UTC)
    • This has nothing to do with that. Kesselring was Field Marshal of the Air Fleet. He was responsible for sending millions of bombers to their demise and he was in charge of the Italian campaign, a very powerful man. As chief of the luftwaffe, he dealt with Italian opposition, and on some occasions, defiance and betrayal. When asked by Leon what he believed to be the most important quality of a soldier, this was his response. And I agree with this strongly. And this goes for all countries in the world. A soldier must be loyal and obey. The very word soldier (soldat) is an old French word derived from "solidarius", latin for "to pay." To pay a debt so to speak, to one's country. Magnificently enthralling quote for me and one of my three all-time favorites. Zarbon 03:00, 30 October 2008 (UTC)
    • What is the powerful meaning behind this quote? It essentially says, "You should obey, because that's the point of being a soldier." I get it. These words are neither thought-provoking nor inspiring. But I'll admit that I agree with the second half of this quote. Lyle 19:55 5, November 2008 (UTC)
    • I myself study military issues and I find this quote to be the best among the suggestions for the day. Whether or not the quote is thought provoking is completely irrelevant. The second half of the quote, like you said, is what makes it powerful. Fossil 23:30, 5 November 2008 (UTC)
      • I never said the second half was powerful. I said I agreed with it, as in, I agree with the idea of doing away with soldiery. Lyle 16:43, 6 November 2008 (UTC)
    • I'm glad that you like my suggestion. I'm sure you will like many of my other suggestions. Thanks for the confidence. Zarbon 06:34, 6 November 2008 (UTC)
    • To Lyle: If you don't like soldiers and service, then it's obvious you wouldn't like it. But for people who love military history, propaganda, and operations, such as myself, it's an epitome of a quote. It depends on what you like, really. I'm a military lover, therefore, the quote is powerful. Some people like the idea...some people don't. A matter of opinion really. Zarbon 06:55, 7 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 4 Waheedone 06:49, 4 November 2008 (UTC)
    • Waheedone, if you are going to rate my favorite suggestion so highly, please explain the reason as to why. Zarbon 15:18, 10 November 2008 (UTC)
    • Lyle, Waheedone...the both of you have absolutely no history for participating in this project aside from casting votes here on the qotd suggestions. If anything, neither of your votes should be taken into account. I'd say the same exact thing about Fossil, but I see he has recently added some pages worth of material. Then again, it's still not a lengthy amount of material or history and even his votes should not be counted. I'm just stating how I feel. At this point, the only votes that should be counted are those of InvisibleSun, Kalki, and myself. There should be voting limitations to people who haven't contributed to wikiquote and are only here to cast votes. Zarbon 15:42, 12 November 2008 (UTC)
      • Zarbon - you seem to be taking this very personally. Calm down. It is evident that you want this quote to be chosen at any expense, including the proposal to ban others from voting. I think I've been voting on QOTD's for about 6 months (and reading them for much longer) and I've recently made my first contribution to the archives. That should be enough, if even necessary. This is Wikiquote, after all. Lyle 20:01, 13 November 2008 (UTC)
        • I thought I made it blatantly obvious how important this is to me. But that is completely besides the point. The fact that questionable people who just cast votes without having any history of contributions is what is most annoying. I agree with Kalki in the notion that all people who do not have any history of contributions should not be allowed to vote. There should be limitations on these grounds and this holds merit because random people aren't supposed to vote without having any history other than the qotd suggestions. I concur with Kalki fully. Only the votes of InvisibleSun, Kalki, and myself, along with some reputable long-time users who have contributed to wikiquote heavily (other than the qotd) should be able to participate in the initial voting process. However, this is not the place to discuss that. When it comes to this specific quote, yes it is one of my most favorites of all time and yes, I have waited a very long time for its acceptance. Zarbon 03:10, 14 November 2008 (UTC)
          • Read QOTD Guidelines. "Any registered user is invited to make proposals, or to rank each candidate on these pages:" I am a registered user. I rank this candidate 1, and I'll move it to its chronilogical space again, where it belongs. Please stop abusing the system to get your quote chosen. Lyle 21:58, 17 November 2008 (UTC)
            • Two key things to remember here: first, you are not an administrator, so you don't need to worry about "chronological order" and stating QOTD guidelines, which also is a bit suspicious since only some, and truly some administrators stress the very minor and insignificant matter of the ordering. The very fact that you would bring that up is suspicious. And secondly, your incessant and constant return and response will not help to include your votes. You have absolutely no contribution either other than casting votes. You deserve the same treatment as any other random person. Zarbon 12:36, 18 November 2008 (UTC)
              • I have contributed (albeit not much), and you make little sense. Lyle 14:30, 20 November 2008 (UTC)
                • I make a lot of sense, and once a rubric is in place, a common guideline if you will, then there will be limitations for voting, especially from people who have no actual contributions. Zarbon 16:03, 20 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 1 Ningauble 19:32, 26 November 2008 (UTC) While it has historical notoriety, I strongly prefer not to memorialize it.
  • 1 Kalki 02:42, 27 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 1 Antiquary 13:19, 29 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 1 InvisibleSun 20:22, 29 November 2008 (UTC)

Get a bicycle. You will not regret it, if you live. ~ Mark Twain (born November 30, 1835)

  • 4 Lyle 15:36, 24 July 2008 (UTC) 3 Lyle 20:40, 10 September 2009 (UTC)
  • 0 Zarbon 04:25, 2 August 2008 (UTC)
    • Just from examining the votes on quotes for this day, I get the impression that Zarbon, Fossil, and Waheedone are either friends or the same person... No matter, this quote is already well-known among bicyclists, and I wouldn't expect everyone to find it humorous. Lyle 15:46, 5 November 2008 (UTC)
    • Hello. I am sorry if you feel that people cannot share the same opinion. I don't particularly find this quote worthwhile myself. Although I have been examining many of the quotes and I don't find this particular one to be deservant of a 1, much less a 4. I think that the quotes have to have some form of impact myself. Being humorous doesn't make it an excellent quote. The fact that you even imply that I am another person is bad enough, but that you believe your suggestion is better... Fossil 23:27, 5 November 2008 (UTC)
    • I'm sure Twain has more worthwhile quotes in comparison to this one, not that I'd suggest it for this year because I am hoping that one of my three alltime favorite quotes makes it. I'm a little upset by your remark Lyle. I don't particularly take well to being referred to as other members. I've been wrongfully accused in the past and I'd appreciate that you do not infer upon something like that. Just because people agree with me, doesn't mean that it's wrong. I'm actually moreso curious as to why you even thought that a quote such as "Get a bicycle. You will not regret it, if you live" would be liked by others. Just because you feel it's a good quote, doesn't mean that others would feel that way also. Zarbon 06:34, 6 November 2008 (UTC)
      • You mean "imply", not "infer". But I didn't imply; I outright said what I thought, and I still believe it. Lyle 16:43, 6 November 2008 (UTC)
        • Why don't you examine Twain further and try to suggest some other quotes by him. This one's too short and bent on humor rather than a powerful image, hence how I personally give quotes high ratings myself. And for this entire year, this date is the most important to me right now...so I honestly hope that my favorite quote makes it above all else. Zarbon 06:58, 7 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 2 Ningauble 19:32, 26 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 2 Kalki 02:42, 27 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 2 Antiquary 13:19, 29 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 2 InvisibleSun 20:22, 29 November 2008 (UTC)

We have not the reverent feeling for the rainbow that the savage has, because we know how it is made. We have lost as much as we gained by prying into that matter. ~ Mark Twain (date of birth)

  • 3 Ningauble 19:32, 26 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 2 Kalki 02:42, 27 November 2008 (UTC) I like the first part of this statement much, and can understand the reasons for the rest of the statement, but I can't agree entirely with the last sentence.
Me either, I find it poignantly ironic: thought provoking in that direct experience of rainbows belies the notion that scientific understanding could diminish anything. ~ Ningauble 17:23, 28 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 1 Zarbon 06:53, 27 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 2 Antiquary 13:19, 29 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 2 InvisibleSun 20:22, 29 November 2008 (UTC)
  • 2 Lyle 20:40, 10 September 2009 (UTC)

Human beings can be awful cruel to one another. ~ Mark Twain, in Adventures of Huckleberry Finn

In reason, all government without the consent of the governed is the very definition of slavery: but in fact, eleven men well armed will certainly subdue one single man in his shirt. ~ Jonathan Swift

Death does not have the power to create unhappiness. ~ Søren Kierkegaard

Always do right. This will gratify some people, and astonish the rest.
~ Mark Twain ~
There isn't time — so brief is life — for bickerings, apologies, heartburnings, callings to account. There is only time for loving — and but an instant, so to speak, for that.
~ Mark Twain ~
Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one's lifetime.
~ Mark Twain ~
You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
~ Mark Twain ~
You can't depend on your judgment when your imagination is out of focus.
~ Mark Twain ~
When in doubt, tell the truth.
~ Mark Twain ~
I disguised myself and came back and studied you. You were easy game. You had an old and lofty reputation for honesty, and naturally you were proud of it — it was your treasure of treasures, the very apple of your eye. As soon as I found out that you carefully and vigilantly kept yourselves and your children out of temptation, I knew how to proceed. Why, you simple creatures, the weakest of all weak things is a virtue which has not been tested in the fire.
~ Mark Twain ~
Honesty is the best policy — when there is money in it.
~ Mark Twain ~
Virtue never has been as respectable as money.
~ Mark Twain ~
Some men worship rank, some worship heroes, some worship power, some worship God, & over these ideals they dispute & cannot unite — but they all worship money.
~ Mark Twain ~
Prosperity is the best protector of principle.
~ Mark Twain ~
Biographies are but clothes and buttons of the man — the biography of the man himself cannot be written.
~ Mark Twain ~
Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.
~ Mark Twain ~
Customs do not concern themselves with right or wrong or reason. But they have to be obeyed; one reasons all around them until he is tired, but he must not transgress them, it is sternly forbidden. … Laws are sand, customs are rock. Laws can be evaded and punishment escaped, but an openly transgressed custom brings sure punishment.
~ Mark Twain ~
An unpopular opinion concerning politics or religion lies concealed in the breast of every man; in many cases not only one sample, but several. The more intelligent the man, the larger the freightage of this kind of opinions he carries, and keeps to himself.
~ Mark Twain ~
Everybody's private motto: It's better to be popular than right.
~ Mark Twain ~
H'aint we got all the fools in town on our side? And ain't that a big enough majority in any town?
~ Mark Twain ~
Murder is forbidden both in form and in fact; free speech is granted in form but forbidden in fact. By the common estimate both are crimes, and are held in deep odium by all civilized peoples. Murder is sometimes punished, free speech always.
~ Mark Twain ~
None but the dead have free speech.
~ Mark Twain ~
Man is a Religious Animal. He is the only Religious Animal. He is the only animal that has the True Religion — several of them. He is the only animal that loves his neighbor as himself and cuts his throat if his theology isn't straight.
~ Mark Twain ~
A critic never made or killed a book or a play. The people themselves are the final judges. It is their opinion that counts. After all, the final test is truth. But the trouble is that most writers regard truth as their most valuable possession and therefore are most economical in its use.
~ Mark Twain ~
We are all missionaries (propagandists of our views). Each of us disapproves of the other missionaries; in fact detests them, as a rule. I am one of the herd myself.
~ Mark Twain ~
Always acknowledge a fault frankly. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you opportunity to commit more.
~ Mark Twain ~
We all do no end of feeling, and we mistake it for thinking. And out of it we get an aggregation which we consider a boon. Its name is public opinion. It is held in reverence. Some think it the voice of God.
~ Mark Twain ~
Not a single right is indestructible: a new might can at any time abolish it, hence, man possesses not a single permanent right.
~ Mark Twain ~
The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.
~ Mark Twain ~
When even the brightest mind in our world has been trained up from childhood in a superstition of any kind, it will never be possible for that mind, in its maturity, to examine sincerely, dispassionately, and conscientiously any evidence or any circumstance which shall seem to cast a doubt upon the validity of that superstition. I doubt if I could do it myself.
~ Mark Twain ~
Education consists mainly in what we have unlearned.
~ Mark Twain ~
The difference between a Miracle and a Fact is exactly the difference between a mermaid and a seal.
~ Mark Twain ~
Only one thing is impossible for God: to find any sense in any copyright law on the planet.
~ Mark Twain ~
I have no color prejudices nor caste prejudices nor creed prejudices. All I care to know is that a man is a human being, and that is enough for me; he can't be any worse.
~ Mark Twain ~
Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our hardnesses yield, all our irritations and resentments flit away and a sunny spirit takes their place.
~ Mark Twain ~
Humor must not professedly teach, and it must not professedly preach, but it must do both if it would live forever. By forever, I mean thirty years.
~ Mark Twain ~

{{quote of the day | quote = The humorous story is told gravely; the teller does his best to conceal the fact that he even dimly suspects that there is anything funny about it. | author = Mark Twain }

I have been complimented many times and they always embarrass me; I always feel that they have not said enough.
~ Mark Twain ~
Good breeding consists in concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.
~ Mark Twain ~
Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of all growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century.
~ Mark Twain ~
I was sorry to have my name mentioned as one of the great authors, because they have a sad habit of dying off. Chaucer is dead, Spencer is dead, so is Milton, so is Shakespeare, and I'm not feeling so well myself.
~ Mark Twain ~
James Ross Clemens, a cousin of mine, was seriously ill two or three weeks ago in London, but is well now. The report of my illness grew out of his illness; the report of my death was an exaggeration.
~ Mark Twain ~
The kernel, the soul — let us go further and say the substance, the bulk, the actual and valuable material of all human utterances — is plagiarism. For substantially all ideas are second-hand, consciously and unconsciously drawn from a million outside sources, and daily used by the garnerer with a pride and satisfaction born of the superstition that he originated them; whereas there is not a rag of originality about them anywhere except the little discoloration they get from his mental and moral calibre and his temperament, and which is revealed in characteristics of phrasing. When a great orator makes a great speech you are listening to ten centuries and ten thousand men — but we call it his speech, and really some exceedingly small portion of it is his. But not enough to signify.
~ Mark Twain ~
It takes a thousand men to invent a telegraph, or a steam engine, or a phonograph, or a photograph, or a telephone or any other important thing—and the last man gets the credit and we forget the others. He added his little mite — that is all he did. These object lessons should teach us that ninety-nine parts of all things that proceed from the intellect are plagiarisms, pure and simple; and the lesson ought to make us modest. But nothing can do that.
~ Mark Twain ~
No doubt we are constantly littering our literature with disconnected sentences borrowed from books at some unremembered time and now imagined to be our own, but that is about the most we can do. In 1866 I read Dr. Holmes's poems, in the Sandwich Islands. A year and a half later I stole his dictation, without knowing it, and used it to dedicate my "Innocents Abroad" with. Then years afterwards I was talking with Dr. Holmes about it. … when I said, "I know now where I stole it, but whom did you steal it from," he said, "I don't remember; I only know I stole it from somebody, because I have never originated anything altogether myself, nor met anybody who had."
~ Mark Twain ~
The difference between the almost right word and the right word is really a large matter — 'tis the difference between the lightning-bug and the lightning.
~ Mark Twain ~
A powerful agent is the right word. Whenever we come upon one of those intensely right words in a book or a newspaper the resulting effect is physical as well as spiritual, and electrically prompt.
~ Mark Twain ~
Thunder is good, thunder is impressive; but it is lightning that does the work.
~ Mark Twain ~
I believe I am not interested to know whether Vivisection produces results that are profitable to the human race or doesn't. To know that the results are profitable to the race would not remove my hostility to it. The pains which it inflicts upon unconsenting animals is the basis of my enmity towards it, and it is to me sufficient justification of the enmity without looking further. It is so distinctly a matter of feeling with me, and is so strong and so deeply-rooted in my make and constitution, that I am sure I could not even see a vivisector vivisected with anything more than a sort of qualified satisfaction.
~ Mark Twain ~
It is just like man's vanity and impertinence to call an animal dumb because it is dumb to his dull perceptions.
~ Mark Twain ~
When I, a thoughtful and unblessed Presbyterian, examine the Koran, I know that beyond any question every Mohammedan is insane; not in all things, but in religious matters. When a thoughtful and unblessed Mohammedan examines the Westminster Catechism, he knows that beyond any question I am spiritually insane. I cannot prove to him that he is insane, because you never can prove anything to a lunatic — for that is a part of his insanity and the evidence of it. He cannot prove to me that I am insane, for my mind has the same defect that afflicts his. All Democrats are insane, but not one of them knows it; none but the Republicans and Mugwumps know it. All the Republicans are insane, but only the Democrats and Mugwumps can perceive it. The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane.
~ Mark Twain ~
"In God We Trust." It is the choicest compliment that has ever been paid us, and the most gratifying to our feelings. It is simple, direct, gracefully phrased: it always sounds well — In God We Trust. I don't believe it would sound any better if it were true.
~ Mark Twain ~
"In God We Trust." Now then, after that legend had remained there forty years or so, unchallenged and doing no harm to anybody, the President suddenly "threw a fit" the other day, as the popular expression goes, and ordered that remark to be removed from our coinage.
Mr. Carnegie granted that the matter was not of consequence, that a coin had just exactly the same value without the legend as with it, and he said he had no fault to find with Mr. Roosevelt's action but only with his expressed reasons for the act. The President had ordered the suppression of that motto because a coin carried the name of God into improper places, and this was a profanation of the Holy Name. Carnegie said the name of God is used to being carried into improper places everywhere and all the time, and that he thought the President's reasoning rather weak and poor.
I thought the same, and said, "But that is just like the President. If you will notice, he is very much in the habit of furnishing a poor reason for his acts while there is an excellent reason staring him in the face, which he overlooks. There was a good reason for removing that motto; there was, indeed, an unassailably good reason — in the fact that the motto stated a lie. If this nation has ever trusted in God, that time has gone by; for nearly half a century almost its entire trust has been in the Republican party and the dollar — mainly the dollar. I recognize that I am only making an assertion and furnishing no proof; I am sorry, but this is a habit of mine; sorry also that I am not alone in it; everybody seems to have this disease.
~ Mark Twain ~
Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.
~ Mark Twain ~
Whose property is my body? Probably mine. I so regard it. If I experiment with it, who must be answerable? I, not the State. If I choose injudiciously, does the State die? Oh no.
~ Mark Twain ~
Man has been here 32,000 years. That it took a hundred million years to prepare the world for him is proof that that is what it was done for. I suppose it is, I dunno. If the Eiffel Tower were now representing the world's age, the skin of paint on the pinnacle-knob at its summit would represent man's share of that age; and anybody would perceive that the skin was what the tower was built for. I reckon they would, I dunno.
~ Mark Twain ~
If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.
~ Mark Twain ~
The silent colossal National Lie that is the support and confederate of all the tyrannies and shams and inequalities and unfairnesses that afflict the peoples — that is the one to throw bricks and sermons at.
~ Mark Twain ~
Your race, in its poverty, has unquestionably one really effective weapon — laughter. Power, Money, Persuasion, Supplication, Persecution — these can lift at a colossal humbug, — push it a little — crowd it a little — weaken it a little, century by century: but only Laughter can blow it to rags and atoms at a blast. Against the assault of Laughter nothing can stand.
~ Mark Twain ~
We believe that out of the public school grows the greatness of a nation.
~ Mark Twain ~
With the daintiest and self-complacentest sarcasm the lifelong loyalist scoffs at the Independent or as he calls him, with cutting irony, the Mugwump; makes himself too killingly funny for anything in this world about him. But the Mugwump can stand it, for there is a great history at his back, stretching down the centuries, and he comes of a mighty ancestry. He knows that in the whole history of the race of men no single great and high and beneficent thing was ever done for the souls and bodies, the hearts and the brains of the children of this world, but a Mugwump started it and Mugwumps carried it to victory. And their names are the stateliest in history: Washington, Garrison, Galileo, Luther, Christ. Loyalty to petrified opinions never yet broke a chain or freed a human soul in this world — and never will.
~ Mark Twain ~
As I slowly grow wise I briskly grow cautious.
~ Mark Twain ~
All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then Success is sure.
~ Mark Twain ~
There is nothing in the world like a persuasive speech to fuddle the mental apparatus and upset the convictions and debauch the emotions of an audience not practised in the tricks and delusions of oratory.
~ Mark Twain ~
To be a patriot, one had to say, and keep on saying, "Our Country, right or wrong," and urge on the little war. Have you not perceived that that phrase is an insult to the nation?
For in a republic, who is "the Country"? Is it the Government which is for the moment in the saddle? Why, the Government is merely a servant — merely a temporary servant; it cannot be its prerogative to determine what is right and what is wrong, and decide who is a patriot and who isn't. Its function is to obey orders, not originate them.
~ Mark Twain ~
To put it in rude, plain, unpalatable words — true patriotism, real patriotism: loyalty not to a Family and a Fiction, but a loyalty to the Nation itself!
~ Mark Twain ~
The kingly office is entitled to no respect; it was originally procured by the highwayman’s methods; it remains a perpetuated crime, can never be anything but the symbol of a crime. It is not more entitled to respect than is the flag of a pirate.
~ Mark Twain ~
Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, but your government only when it deserves it.
~ Mark Twain ~
In the beginning of a change, the patriot is a scarce man, and brave, and hated and scorned. When his cause succeeds, the timid join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot.
~ Mark Twain ~


In a monarchy, the king and his family are the country; in a republic it is the common voice of the people. Each of you, for himself, by himself and on his own responsibility, must speak. And it is a solemn and weighty responsibility, and not lightly to be flung aside at the bullying of pulpit, press, government, or the empty catch-phrases of politicians. Each must for himself alone decide what is right and what is wrong, and which course is patriotic and which isn't. You cannot shirk this and be a man. To decide it against your convictions is to be an unqualified and inexcusable traitor, both to yourself and to your country, let men label you as they may.
~ Mark Twain ~
When the doctrine of allegiance to party can utterly up-end a man's moral constitution and make a temporary fool of him besides, what excuse are you going to offer for preaching it, teaching it, extending it, perpetuating it? Shall you say, the best good of the country demands allegiance to party? Shall you also say it demands that a man kick his truth and his conscience into the gutter, and become a mouthing lunatic, besides?
~ Mark Twain ~


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