Twelfth Doctor

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Doctor Who — Incarnations of The Doctor : 1st - 2nd - 3rd - 4th - 5th - 6th - 7th - 8th - War - 9th - 10th - 11th - 12th
Companions : Jack Harkness · Martha Jones · Donna Noble · Clara Oswald · Amy Pond · River Song · Rose Tyler · Rory Williams
Adversaries : Cybermen · Daleks · The Great Intelligence · The Master · Rassilon

This page is a collection of quotations from the era of the twelfth official incarnation of The Doctor from the BBC science fiction television programme Doctor Who, portrayed by Scottish actor Peter Capaldi.

I am not … a "good man"! … And I'm not a bad man. … I am not a "hero" — and I'm definitely not a President — and no — I'm not an officer! … You know what I am? … I AM an IDIOT! … with a box — and a screwdriver passing through, helping out, learning.

2013 specials[edit]

Kidneys! I've got new kidneys! I don't like the colour.

The Day of the Doctor[edit]

(23 November 2013)
Gallifreyan General: I didn't know when I was well off. All twelve of them!
Androgar: No, sir. [Another TARDIS flies into view] All thirteen! [The Twelfth Doctor's hand and eyes appear.]

The Time of the Doctor[edit]

(25 December 2013)
[The Doctor has regenerated]
The Doctor: Kidneys! I've got new kidneys! [puzzled] I don't like the colour.
Clara: [weakly] Of your kidneys? [The TARDIS starts shaking] What's happening?!?
The Doctor: We're probably crashing. Oh!
Clara: Into what?!?
The Doctor: [pressing buttons] Stay calm! Just one question... Do you happen to know how to fly this thing? [we see Clara's horrified expression...]

Series 8[edit]

Deep Breath [8.1][edit]

(23 August 2014)

[Strax knocks on the TARDIS door, smeared with dinosaur spit]
Strax: Hello? Exit the box, and surrender to the glory of the Sontaran Empire.
[The Twelfth Doctor (still wearing the Eleventh's outfit (minus bow tie) opens the door and looks out, eyes manic. Smoke comes out as well.]
The Doctor: Shoosh!! [closes the door]
Strax: [bewildered] Doctor?
[The door opens again and the Doctor peeks out]
The Doctor: I was being chased by a giant dinosaur, but I think I managed to give it the slip.
[The door shuts again, then is opened slowly. The Doctor looks out at Strax, puzzled, trying to remember]
The Doctor: Sleepy?
Strax: [bewildered] Sir?
The Doctor: [stepping out of the TARDIS] Bashful? Sneezy? Dopey? [grins - now he's got it!] Grumpy! [he sees Vastra and Jenny and walks towards them] Ohh, you two. The green one... and the not-green one. Or it could be the other way round, I mustn't pre-judge.
[Clara stumbles out of the TARDIS, very disheveled and out of breath]
The Doctor: Oh, you remember, er... thingy. The... er... the not-me one. The asking questions one. Names not my area.
Clara: Clara.
The Doctor: Well, it might be Clara. Might not be. It's a lottery.
Clara: It is Clara!!
The Doctor: Well, I'm not ruling it out- [the dinosaur roars] Oi, big man, shut it!! [the dinosaur bellows again, and the Doctor sees it properly; he dashes towards Vastra and Jenny in a panic] Ohh - you've got a dinosaur too! [Another bellow] Big woman... sorry.
Clara: Doctor, listen to me. You... you need to calm down.
The Doctor: [to dinosaur] I'm not flirting, by the way.
Clara: [to Vastra and Jenny] I think something's gone wrong.
The Doctor: Wrong? What's gone wrong? Have you regenerated? [to Clara] I remember you... you're Handles! You used to be a little... a little robot head, and now you... [shakes his head, unimpressed] You've really let yourself go...
[The dinosaur bellows again.]
The Doctor: Reduce the frequency.
Madame Vastra: I'm sorry?
The Doctor: Your sonic lanterns, turn them down. You're giving her a headache.
Jenny: Giving who a headache?
The Doctor: My lady friend! [to dinosaur] Just an expression, don't get any ideas.
Strax: How do you know?
The Doctor: Come on, Clara, you know that I speak Dinosaur.
Clara: [pointing to Strax, then herself] He's not Clara. I'm Clara!
The Doctor: Well, you're very similar heights. Maybe you should wear labels? [frowns, looks at Clara] Why... why are you all doing that? Why are you...? You're all going... dark... and wobbly. Stop that!
Clara: I don't think we are.
The Doctor: Never mind!! Everyone - take five... [He stiffens, his eyes roll up, and he falls over face-first into the mud. The TARDIS Cloister Bell rings once as Clara dashes over to him]
Clara: What do we do?
Jenny: I don't understand. Who is he? Where's the Doctor?
Clara: Right here. That's him. That's the Doctor.
Madame Vastra: Well then - here we go again...

[At Madame Vastra's, Clara and Jenny are listening at a door as the Doctor protests loudly]
The Doctor: It's simply misunderstandable to me. I don't know what it is - [yanks the door open, and the girls almost fall into the room; he is now in a Victorian nightshirt] Who invented this room?!?
Clara: Doctor, please, you have to lie down.
The Doctor: It doesn't make sense. Look, it's only got a bed in it. Why is there only a bed in it?
Clara: Because it's a bedroom - it's for sleeping in.
The Doctor: Okay, what do you do when you're awake?
Jenny: You leave the room.
The Doctor: So you've got a whole room for not being awake in? [Clara and Jenny nod in agreement] But what's the point? You're just missing the room. And don't look in that mirror, it's absolutely furious.
Clara: Doctor, please. You have to lie down, you keep passing out.
The Doctor: Well, of course I keep passing out. There's all these beds. Why do you keep talking like that? What's gone wrong with your accent? Why-
Jenny: Nothing's wrong with her accent.
The Doctor: You sound the same. It's spreading. You all sound all... English. No, you've all developed a fault...
Madame Vastra: [with a Scots accent] Doctor, I need your help with something.
The Doctor: Finally, someone who can talk properly.
Madame Vastra: I'm having difficulty sleeping.
The Doctor: Oh? Oh, well, I wouldn't bother with that, I never bother with sleep. I just do standy-up catnaps.
Madame Vastra: Oh, really? How interesting. And when do you do those?
The Doctor: Well, generally, whenever anyone else starts talking. I like to skip ahead to my bits, it saves time.
[Vastra gently leads him to the bed and they sit down.]
Madame Vastra: Save me time, Doctor. Project an image of perfect sleep into the centre of my mind.
The Doctor: What, do you want a psychic link with me? The size of my brain, it would be like dropping a piano on you.
Madame Vastra: Be gentle, then.
The Doctor: I'll try. Brace yourself. Piano.
[They put their fingers to the other's temple. BOING! The Doctor falls back onto the bed, sound asleep]
Madame Vastra: [in her normal accent] I love monkeys, they're so funny.
Jenny: Oh, I see. So people are monkeys now, are they?
Madame Vastra: No, dear. People are apes. [grins] Men are monkeys.

The Doctor: [runs to a door, opens it] Door. Boring. Not me. [runs to a window, opens it, manic grin] Me!!

Barney: I don't like it.
The Doctor: What?
Barney: Your face!
The Doctor: Well, I don't like it either! It's all right up to the eyebrows, then it just goes haywire! Look at the eyebrows. These are attack eyebrows. You can take bottle tops off with these!
Barney: They are mighty eyebrows, indeed, sir.
The Doctor: They're cross! They're crosser than the rest of my face. They're independently cross! They probably want to cede from the rest of my face and set up their own independent state of eyebrows! Oh, that's Scots... I am Scottish. Haven't I? I've gone Scottish?
Barney: Yes, you are. You are definitely Scots, sir. I... I hear it in your voice.
The Doctor: Oh, no, that's good. [he practices the 'oh' sound] It's good I'm Scottish. I'm Scottish. I am Scottish. I can complain about things, I can really complain about things.

The Doctor: Look... [shows Barney a newspaper clipping about the recent "spontaneous combustion" case] Spontaneous combustion.
Barney: What devilry is this, sir?
The Doctor: I don't know, but I'd probably blame the English.

The Doctor: [confronting the Half-Faced Man] This is your power source. And feeble though it is, I can use it to blow this whole room if I see one thing that I don't like. And that includes karaoke and mimes, so take no chances.

The Doctor: [to Clara] You're great on adrenaline. [to the Half-Faced Man] And you're out of your depth, sir. Never try and control a control freak.
Clara: I am not a control freak!
The Doctor: Yes ma'am.

The Doctor: Clara, say the word.
Clara: What word?
The Doctor: They never sent you in here without a word.
Clara: I don't want to say it.
The Doctor: I've guessed it already.
The Doctor and Clara: Geronimo!
[The Paternoster Gang makes its entrance ninja-style. Madame Vastra and Jenny draw their weapons.]
Madame Vastra: Remain still and lay down your weapons in the name of the British Empire.
[Strax is seen clumsily falling down from the ceiling behind Madame Vastra and Jenny]
Jenny: Strax!
Strax: [gets up quickly] Sorry.
Jenny: [discreetly] I told you before. Take the stairs!
The Doctor: [deadpan] Oh look. The cavalry.

Half-Faced Man: I burned an ancient, beautiful creature for one inch of optic nerve. What do you think you can accomplish, little man?!

Half-Faced Man: We will destroy you.
The Doctor: No, you won't. You're logical. You have restraint. You kill to survive; you're not a murderer.
Clara: What?! This is a Slaughterhouse!
The Doctor: And how does that make it different from any other restaurant? You weren't a vegetarian the last time I checked. [To Half-Faced Man] This is over! Killing us won't change it. What would be the point!
Half-Faced Man: To find the Promised Land.
The Doctor: You're millions of years old, it's time you knew: there isn't one!
Half-Faced Man: I am search of Paradise!
The Doctor: Yeah, well, me too. I'm not going to make it either!

The Doctor: [to the Half-Faced Man] You are a broom. Question: you take a broom, you replace the handle. Then, later, you replace the brush. And you do that over and over again. Is it still the same broom? Answer: No, of course it isn't! But you can still sweep the floor! Which is not strictly relevant. Skip that last part. You have replaced every piece of yourself, mechanical and organic, time and time again — there's not a trace of the original you left — [holds up a silver tray, showing the Half-Faced Man his reflection] You probably can't even remember where you got that face from. [catches his own reflection in the tray's opposite side]

The Doctor: I'm the Doctor. I've lived for over two thousand years, and not all of them were good. I've made many mistakes, and it's about time I did something about that. Clara, I'm not your boyfriend.
Clara: I never thought you were.
The Doctor: I never said it was your mistake.

Into the Dalek [8.2][edit]

You asked me if you were a good man. And the answer is, I don't know. But I think you try to be. And I think that's probably the point.
(30 August 2014)

The Doctor: Wow, a molecular nano-scaler!
Journey: You know what it does, then?
The Doctor: It miniaturises living matter. What's the medical application, though? Do you shrink the surgeons so they can climb inside the patients?
Morgan: Exactly.
The Doctor: Fantastic idea for a movie. Terrible idea for a proctologist.

The Doctor: I need something from you. I need the truth.
Clara: OK. Right, what is it? What's... [Sees the look on The Doctor's face] You're scared.
The Doctor: I'm terrified.
Clara: Of what?
The Doctor: Of the answer to my next question. Which must be honest, cold, and considered without kindness or restraint. Clara, be my pal. Tell me... am I a good man?
Clara: I... don't know.
The Doctor: [sighs] Neither do I.

The Doctor: This is Clara. Not my assistant. She's...er...some other word.
Clara: I'm his carer.
The Doctor: Yeah, my carer. She cares so I don't have to.

The Doctor: Dalek mutants are born hating. This is what stokes the fire, extinguishes the tiniest glimmer of kindness, compassion. Imagine the worst possible thing in the Universe, and then don't bother because you're looking at it right now. This is evil refined as engineering.

"Rusty" the Dalek: Victory is yours. But it does not please you.
The Doctor: You looked inside me, and you saw hatred. That's not victory. Victory would've been a good Dalek.
"Rusty" the Dalek: I am not a good Dalek. You are a good Dalek.

Clara: [to the Doctor] You asked me if you were a good man. And the answer is, I don't know. But I think you try to be. And I think that's probably the point.

Robot of Sherwood [8.3][edit]

(6 September 2014)
The Doctor: Old-fashioned heroes only exist in old-fashioned storybooks, Clara.
Clara: What about you?
The Doctor: Me?
Clara: Yeah. You. You stop bad things happening every minute of every day. That sounds pretty heroic to me.
The Doctor: [modestly] Just passing the time.

The Doctor: You're not serious.
Robin: [amused] I'm many things, sir, but I'm never that. Robin Hood laughs in the face of all. Ha ha ha!
The Doctor: And do people ever punch you in the face when you do that?
Robin: Not as yet.
The Doctor: Lucky I'm here, then, isn't it?

The Doctor: Listen to me. It doesn't have to end like this. Shut it all down, return Clara to me and I'll do what I can.
Sheriff of Nottingham: I don't have Clara.
The Doctor: Robin's one of yours.
Sheriff of Nottingham: What did you say?
The Doctor: He's one of your tin-headed puppets, just like these brutes here.
Sheriff of Nottingham: Robin Hood is not one of mine.
The Doctor: Of course he is. He's a robot, created by your mechanical mates.
Sheriff of Nottingham: Why would they do that?
The Doctor: To pacify the locals, give them false hope. He's the opiate of the masses.
Sheriff of Nottingham: [scoffs] Why would we create an enemy to fight us? What sense would that make? That would be a terrible idea.
The Doctor: Yes! [frowns, considering this] Yes, it would... Wouldn't it? Yes, that would be a rubbish idea! Why would you do that? [stops] But he can't be... He's not real... He's a legend!
Robin: Too kind! And this legend does not come alone.

Robin: So, is it true, Doctor?
The Doctor: Is what true?
Robin: That in the future I am forgotten as a real man. I am but a legend.
The Doctor: I'm afraid it is.
Robin: Hmm... Good. History is a burden. Stories can make us fly.
The Doctor: I'm still having a little trouble believing yours, I'm afraid.
Robin: Is it so hard to credit? That a man born into wealth and privilege should find the plight of the oppressed and weak too much to bear... until one night he is moved to steal a TARDIS? Fly among the stars, fighting the good fight? Clara told me your stories.
The Doctor: [irritated] She should not have told you any of that.
Robin: Well, once the story started, she could hardly stop herself. You are her hero, I think.
The Doctor: I'm not a hero.
Robin: Well neither am I. But if we both keep pretending to be — ha ha — perhaps others will be heroes in our name. Perhaps we will both be stories. And may those stories never end. [they shake hands] Goodbye, Doctor, Time Lord of Gallifrey.
The Doctor: Goodbye, Robin Hood, Earl of Loxley.
Robin: And remember, Doctor… I'm just as real as you are.

Listen [8.4][edit]

Logically, if evolution were to perfect a creature whose primary skill were to hide from view, how could you know it existed? It could be with us every second and we would never know. How would you detect it? Even sense it?
(13 September 2014)
The Doctor: Listen! Question: Why do we talk out loud when we know we're alone? Conjecture: because we know we are not. Evolution perfects survival skills. There are perfect hunters. There is perfect defense. Question: Why is there no such thing as perfect hiding? Answer: How would you know? Logically, if evolution were to perfect a creature whose primary skill were to hide from view, how could you know it existed? It could be with us every second and we would never know. How would you detect it? Even sense it? Except in those moments when, for no clear reason, you choose to speak aloud. What would such a creature want? What would it do?

The Doctor: You know sometimes when you talk to yourself? What if you're not?
Clara: Not what?
The Doctor: What if it's not you you're talking to? Proposition: What if no one is ever really alone? What if every single living being has a... companion. A silent passenger. A shadow. What if the prickle on the back of your neck is the breath of something close behind you?
Clara: How long have you been travelling alone?
The Doctor: Perhaps I never have.

The Doctor:[to Rupert] Are you scared? The thing on the bed, whatever it is… Look at it, does it scare you?
Rupert: Yes.
The Doctor: Well, that's good. Want to know why that's good?
Rupert: Why?
The Doctor: Let me tell you about scared. Your heart is beating so hard -- I can feel it through your hands! There's so much blood and oxygen pumping through your brain, it's like rocket fuel. Right now, you could run faster and you could fight harder. You can jump higher than ever in your life. And you are so alert, it's like you can slow down time. What's wrong with scared? Scared is a super power! It's your super power! There is danger in this room, and guess what? It's you. Do you feel it? [Rupert nods. The Doctor nods at the creature on the bed] Think he feels it? Do you think he's scared? [Rupert shakes his head] [mockingly] Nah. Loser.

The Doctor: What's that in the mirror? Or the corner of your eye?
What's that footstep following, but never passing by?
Perhaps they're all just waiting, perhaps when we're all dead,
Out they'll come a-slithering from underneath the bed.

Clara: Listen… This is just a dream. But very clever people can hear dreams. So please, just listen. I know you're afraid, but being afraid is alright. Because didn't anybody ever tell you that fear is a superpower? Fear can make you faster and cleverer and stronger. And one day, you're going to come back to this barn, and on that day, you are going to be very afraid indeed. But that’s ok. Because if you’re very wise, and very strong, fear doesn't have to make you cruel or cowardly… fear can make you kind. It doesn't matter if there’s nothing under the bed or in the dark, so long as you know it's ok to be afraid of it. So, listen. If you listen to nothing else, listen to this. You're always going to be afraid, even if you learn to hide it. fear is like… a companion. A constant companion, always there. But that's ok. Because fear can bring us together. Fear can bring you home. I'm going to leave you something, just so you’ll always remember… fear makes companions of us all.

Time Heist [8.5][edit]

(20 September 2014)
Clara: [To the Doctor, as the TARDIS phone rings] There you go, you've got another playmate. [The Doctor goes to answer the phone.] Don't.
The Doctor: Why not?
Clara: Because if you answer it, something will happen.
The Doctor: What?
Clara: A thing.
The Doctor: It's just a phone, Clara. Nothing happens when you answer the phone. [The Doctor picks up the phone, and they suddenly find themselves in an unknown location.]

Clara: What if the plan is we're blowing up the floor for someone else? What if we're not supposed to make it out alive?
The Doctor: Don't be so pessimistic. It'll affect team morale.
Saibra: What? And getting us blown up won't?
The Doctor: Only very, very briefly.

Psi: I still don't get why you're in charge.
The Doctor: Basically, it's the eyebrows.

The Doctor: So much mental traffic in the universe. Solitude is the only peace.

The Doctor: Robbin' a bank. Robbin' a whole bank. Beat that for a date.

The Caretaker [8.6][edit]

(27 September 2014)
Clara: Are there aliens in this school?
The Doctor: Listen, it's lovely talking to you, but I've really got to get on. I'm the caretaker, now. Look, I've got a brush.
Clara: Doctor. Is there an alien in this school?
The Doctor: Yes, me. Now go. The walls need sponging, and there's a sinister puddle.

Clara: What's that?
The Doctor: A scanner. I'm scanning. Why do I keep you around?
Clara: Because the alternative would be developing a conscience of your own. Scanning for what?
The Doctor: Any alien technology in this vicinity should show up. I used to have a teacher exactly like you.
Clara: You still do. Pay attention.

Courtney: What's in the box? It's not really a policeman, is it?
The Doctor: You want to know what's in that box? I'll tell you what's in that box! It's a Time Machine! It also travels in space! And it usually contains a man who just wants to get on with his work of preventing the end of the world — but keeps on getting interrupted by boring little humans!
Courtney: Cool! So that's really a spaceship!
The Doctor: I'm serious. I'm trying to save this planet.
Courtney: End of the world for me tonight whatever you do. Parent's evening.
The Doctor: Is your name really Disruptive Influence?
Courtney: Courtney Woods. Can I go in space?
The Doctor: I'll let you know. I may have a vacancy. But not right now.

Danny: [after the Doctor instructs Clara to get the Skovox Blitzer to chase her] You're using her like a decoy?
The Doctor: No, not like a decoy. I'm using her as a decoy. Don’t they teach you anything in Stupid School?

Police Support Officer: Where am I?
Seb: What name would you like? There's a range. The Afterlife, the Promised Land. I'm partial to the Nethersphere.
Police Support Officer: [looks out of the sole window in the white hall] My god.
Seb: [sees Missy the Gatekeeper walk away from a closed door, casting him a glance] Sorry, she's a bit busy today. So … any questions?

Kill the Moon [8.7][edit]

(4 October 2014)
Clara: Tell me what you knew, Doctor, or I'll smack you so hard you'll regenerate.
The Doctor: I knew that eggs are not bombs. I know they don't usually destroy their nests. Essentially what I knew was: you would always make the best choice. I had faith that you'd always make the right choice.
Clara: Honestly, d'you have music playin' in your head when you say rubbish like that?
The Doctor: It wasn't my decision, I told you.

Clara Oswald: Shut up! I am so sick of listening to you!
The Doctor: Well, I didn't do it for Courtney. I didn't know what was going to happen. D'you think I'm lying?
Clara: I don't know. I don't know! If you didn't do it for her, I mean... D'know what? It was cheap. It was pathetic. No, no, no, it was patronising! That was you patting us on the back, saying "You're big enough to go to the shops yourself now. Go on, Toddle along".
The Doctor: No, that was me allowing you to make a choice about your own future. That was me... respecting you.
Clara: Oh my god, really? Was it? Yeah, well respected is not how I feel! [Clara sobs]
The Doctor: Right, OK.
Clara: I nearly didn't press that button! I nearly got it wrong. That was you, my friend, making me scared... Making me feel like a bloody idiot.
The Doctor: Language.
Clara: Oh, don't you ever tell me to mind my language! Don't you ever tell me to take the stabilisers off my bike! And don't you dare lump me in with the rest of all the little humans that you think are so tiny and silly and predictable! You walk our Earth, Doctor, you breath our air, you make us your friend. That is your moon, too, Doctor, and you can damn well help us when we need it!
The Doctor: I was helping.
Clara: What, by clearing off?
The Doctor: Yes.
Clara: Yeah? Well, clear off! Go On! Get back in your lonely... your lonely bloody TARDIS, and you don't come back — and you don't come back.
[Clara storms towards the doors]
The Doctor: Clara! Clara!
Clara: You go away. And you don't come back. OK? You go a long way away.

Mummy on the Orient Express [8.8][edit]

(11 October 2014)
The Doctor: I couldn't risk Gus finding out my plan and stopping me.
Clara: So you were... pretending to be heartless?
The Doctor: Would you like to think that about me? Would that make it easier? [pause] I didn't know if I could save her. I couldn't save Quell, I couldn't save Moorhouse. There was a good chance that she'd die too. At which point... I would have just moved on to the next... and the next, until I beat it. Sometimes the only choices you have are bad ones, but you still have to choose.

Flatline [8:9][edit]

(18 October 2014)
Clara: It worked. They charged the TARDIS.
The Doctor: [emerging from the TARDIS to confront the monsters] I tried to talk. I want you to remember that. I tried to reach out. I tried to understand you, but I think you understand us perfectly — I think that you just don't care. And I don't know whether you're here to invade, infiltrate or just replace us — I don't suppose it really matters now. You are monsters! That is the role you seem determined to play! So it seems that I must play mine: the man that stops the monsters. I'm sending you back to your own dimension. Who knows, some of you may even survive the trip. And if you do, remember this: you are not welcome here! This plane is protected! I am the Doctor! …And I name you: the Boneless!

In the Forest of the Night [8:10][edit]

We are here. Here always since the beginning and until the end.
After your wars are over, we will still be here. We are the Life that prevails.
What? Coronal ejections, geomagnetic storms, how often do you get a playlist like that?
(25 October 2014)
The Doctor: Maebh... Maebh, this forest is communicating, with you — nobody else. No technology can hear what it's saying, but you can. Tell us what it wants, where it came from. Just tell me, who did this?
Maebh: It was me. I did this. I did these trees.
The Doctor: No, Maebh. You didn't make a global forest appear overnight. How could you do that?
Maebh: Thoughts come to me. Ever since Annabelle went missing, I look for her everywhere. I don't find her, but I find thoughts. The big forest was one. I thought everyone would love it. The thoughts, the thoughts! They go so fast!
Bradley: This is stressing me now. When I get stressed, I forget my anger management.
Clara: Maebh? Can you see something that we can't see?
Maebh: Nearly too fast, everywhere!
The Doctor: Everything's subject to gravity. If I can create a little local increase.
Danny Pink: No, you're not experimenting on...
Maebh: [Sprites suddenly appear] They're lovely! They don't like it when you're holding them. They want you to let them go.
The Doctor: Who are they?
Sprites: [through Maebh] We are here. Here always since the beginning and until the end.
The Doctor: Here, that's it?
Sprites: We are the green shoots that grow between the cracks. The grass that grows over the mass graves. After your wars are over, we will still be here. We are the Life that prevails.
The Doctor: Why now? Why are you here now?
Sprites: We hear the call and we come. As we came before to the great north forest, where we lie still in the great circle, as we came to the vast southern forest.
The Doctor: Who's calling you now?
Sprites: The Sun that creates, the Sun that destroys. You are hurting us, let us go.
The Doctor: You sent for me. The girl came looking for me. Why? Why me?
Sprites: We did not... send... pain, did not send for you. We don't know you. We were here before you, and we'll be here after you.

Clara: This really is gonna happen, isn't it?
The Doctor: Stars implode, planets grow cold, catastrophe is the metabolism of the universe. I can fight monsters, I can't fight physics.
Clara: Why would trees want to kill us? We love trees.
The Doctor: You've been chopping them down for furniture for centuries. If that's love, no wonder they're calling down fire from the heavens.
Clara: But we saw the future. Lots of futures. Earth's futures.
The Doctor: They're about to be erased.
Clara: If you can't save them all, save what you can. TARDIS. It's a lifeboat, isn't it? Not everybody has to die.

Clara: So, trip to space, anyone?
Ruby: I want my mum.
Boy: I slightly want my mum too.
Clara: Tell them, Mr. Pink, what an educational opportunity...
Danny: You... You go. This... this is enough for me.
Clara: What? Coronal ejections, geomagnetic storms, how often do you get a playlist like that?
Danny: I was a soldier. I put myself at risk. I didn't try too hard to survive but somehow, here I am. And now I can see what I nearly lost and it's enough. I don't want to see more things, I want to see the things that are in front of me more clearly. There are wonders here, Clara Oswald. Bradley saying "please", that's a wonder. One person is more amazing... harder to understand, but more amazing than universes.
Clara: Really? What person is that, then? [They kiss]

The Doctor: It’s the human superpower: forgetting. If you remembered how things felt, you’d have stopped having wars. And stopped having babies.

Dark Water [8.11][edit]

(1 November 2014)
Clara: What do we do now? What happens now, you and me? Doctor?
The Doctor: Go to hell.
Clara: Fair enough. Absolutely fair enough. [walks towards the TARDIS doors]
The Doctor: [puzzled] Clara? You asked me what we're going to do. I told you: we're going to Hell. Or wherever it is where people die. If there is anywhere. Wherever it is, we're going to find Danny, and if it is in any way possible, we're going to bring him home. [smiles] Almost every culture in the universe has some concept of an afterlife. I always meant to have a look around, see if I could find one.
Clara: You're going to help me?
The Doctor: Well, why wouldn't I help you?
Clara: Because of what I just did. I–
The Doctor: You betrayed me. You betrayed my trust, you betrayed our friendship, you betrayed everything I ever stood for. You let me down!
Clara: Then why are you helping me?
The Doctor: Why? Do you think I care for you so little that betraying me would make any difference?

Missy: My heart is maintained by the doctor
The Doctor: Doctor Who?
Missy: DR. CHANG !!!!

Dr Chang: White noise off the telly. We've all heard it. A few years ago, Dr Skarosa, our founder, did something unexpected: he played that noise through a translation matrix of his own devising. This is a recording of what he heard.
[Chang plays the white noise, revealing it to be many human voices]
Clara: Okay, people, voices…
The Doctor: So what?
Dr Chang: Over time, Dr Skarosa became convinced these were the voices of the recently departed. He believed it was a telepathic communication from the dead.
The Doctor: Why, was he an idiot?
Dr Chang: He was able to isolate some of the voices, hear what they were saying.
The Doctor: So, an idiot, then?
Clara: Shut up, Doctor.
Dr Chang: What I'm about to play for you will change your life, and not for the better. These are the three words that caused Dr Skarosa to set up institutes like one, all over the world, to protect the dead. If you'd rather not hear these words, there's still t–
The Doctor: [exasperated] Can you just hurry up, please? Or I'll hit you with my shoe.
[Chang plays the voice]
Voice: [repeating] Don't cremate me… don't cremate me…
Dr Chang: There is one simple, horrible possibility that has never occurred to anyone throughout human history.
Clara: [horrified] Don't say it.
Dr Chang: The dead remain conscious. The dead remain fully aware of everything that is happening to them.

Missy: [about the Nethersphere] Imagine you could upload dying minds to that, edit them, rearrange them, get rid of all those boring emotions, ready to be re-downloaded. Meanwhile, you upgrade the bodies. Upload the mind, upgrade the body. Cybermen from cyberspace - Now why has no-one ever thought about that before?
The Doctor: How did you get hold of Time Lord technology? Who are you?
Missy: You know who I am. You felt it. [places her hand on her heart and mockingly gasps] Surely you did?
The Doctor: [realises] Two hearts...
Missy: And both of them yours.
The Doctor: You're a Time Lord.
Missy: Time Lady, please. I'm old-fashioned.
The Doctor: Which Time Lady?
Missy: The one you abandoned, Doctor. The one you left for dead. Didn't you ever think I'd find my way back?
The Doctor: [horrified] Clara, Clara, Clara, I've got to find Clara! [runs towards the lift]
Missy: [mockingly] Oh "Clara, Clara, Clara"! You know, I should shoot you in a jealous rage. Now wouldn't that be sexy? I've turned the lift off, though.
The Doctor: I presume you have stairs.
Missy: Well, I'm not a Dalek. [The Doctor runs outside and scans the scene in shock] Oh dear, Doctor. Didn't you realise where you were?
[The camera zooms out to reveal him standing on the steps of St Paul's Cathedral.]

Missy: You know the key strategic weakness of the human race? The dead outnumber the living.
The Doctor: ...Who are you?
Missy: Oh, you know who I am. I'm Missy.
The Doctor: Who's Missy?
Missy: [groans in irritation] Please, try to keep up. Short for "Mistress". [smirks] Well, couldn't very well keep calling myself "The Master", now could I?
[The Doctor stares at her, horrified]

Death in Heaven [8.12][edit]

(8 November 2014)
Kate Lethbridge-Stewart: [to the Cybermen] Afternoon. You've picked a lovely day for it. My, don't you look shiny? [to the Doctor] Haircut?
The Doctor: Bit of a trim.
Kate: Might want to do your roots. [motions to a soldier to take Missy] The woman. [to the Cybermen] Kate Stewart: divorcee; mother of two; keen gardener; outstanding bridge player. Also, Chief Scientific Officer of the Unified Intelligence Taskforce, who currently have you surrounded.
Cyberman: Human weaponry is not effective against Cyber technology.
Kate: Sorry, you left this behind on one of your previous attempts. [throws down a damaged Cyberman helmet from The Invasion.] So, now that I have your attention, welcome to the only planet on the universe where we get to say this: he's on the payroll.
The Doctor: Am I?
Kate: Well, technically.
The Doctor: How much?
Kate: Shh. Any questions?
[The Cybermen fly off into the sky]

The Doctor: I am not a good man! I'm not a bad man. I'm not a hero. I'm definitely not a President, and no, I'm not an officer. You know who I am? I... AM... an idiot. With a box, and a screwdriver. Passing through. Helping out. Learning. I don't need an army. I never have. Because I've got them, always them, because love is not an emotion; love is a promise, and he will never hurt her. P.E.! Catch! [Tosses the control bracelet to Danny before turning to Missy] You didn't notice, did you? While you were doing all your silly orders, while you were showing off, the one soldier not obeying?

The Doctor: [realizes who the last Cyberman is] Of course... the Earth's darkest hour and mine. Where else would you be? [Salutes the Brigadier]

The Doctor: The difference is this. Pain is a gift. Without the capacity for pain, we can't feel the hurt we inflict.

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