Regular Show is an American animated television series created by J.G. Quintel for Cartoon Network. The series revolved around the lives of two friends, a blue jay named Mordecai and a raccoon named Rigby—both employed as groundskeepers at a local park.
The Naive Man from Lolliland (2005)
- Pops: Let's see what's in the newspaper. "Ambassador from Lolliland visits the United States for the first time." [The camera zooms in to a picture of Pops] I say good show, Very good show. [A waiter walks to Pops] I say why the handsome chap in the newspaper don't you think?
- [The newspaper shows Pops and Pops chuckles]
- Waiter: Uh, sure. I'll be back in a second for the check.
- [Pops folds the newspaper and looks at the check]
- Pops: Let's see here I think, 25 percent tip, yes jolly good show jolly good show deserves jolly good tip I always say.
- [Pops puts some lollipops in the bill]
- Waiter: Can I get you any change sir?
- Pops: No, no it's all for you my good man, top notch service.
- Waiter: Wow thanks sir, very generous of you.
- Pops: Oh well, good day young man.
- [Pops walks away and the waiter opens the bill to see lollipops in there]
2 in the AM PM (2006)
- Clerk #2 (Sam Marin): [suspicious] I think there's something wrong with this candy.
- Clerk #1 (J. G. Quintel): Uh, wh... what do you mean? What are you talking about?
- Clerk #2 (Sam Marin): I don't know, it tastes funny.
- Clerk #1 (J. G. Quintel): Huh. Hmm. Oh, oh, yeah, yeah. Huh, huh, yeah. That's because I put drugs in it.
- Clerk #2 (Sam Marin): What? Why?! Uh... What's wrong with you?!
- Clerk #1 (J. G. Quintel): Uh, geez. I'm sorry. I.. I thought..
- Clerk #2 (Sam Marin): Whoa, huh! You thought wrong! I mean, what did you put in these things anyway?
- Clerk #1 (J. G. Quintel): It's.. It's just a little marijuana. It's just a little marijuana.
- Clerk #2 (Sam Marin): [softly] Weed candy. You put weed in a candy bar.
- Clerk #1 (J. G. Quintel): Oh, oh no, wait! Ha ha! No, no, I remember now. Don't worry, dude, I didn't put any weed in this candy. It was acid!
- Clerk #2 (Sam Marin): [spits out candy] WHAT?! ACID?! What the f**k is wrong with you?!
- Clerk #1 (J. G. Quintel): I'm... I'm sorry.
- Clerk #2 (Sam Marin): I mean, you said that like acid is safer than weed. You know it's not, right?
- Clerk #1 (J. G. Quintel): Yes. Yeah, uh. Yeah, I knew. Sorry, I... I don't know why I said that.
- Prototype-Benson: What are we going to do when someone comes in for gas? We can't help people when were like this. [his face swirls for a split-second] We can't help people when were like this.
- Prototype-Mordecai: Yeah, we can.
- Prototype-Benson: No! Were gonna get fired over this crap!
- Prototype-Mordecai: Look... look just calm down. It's two in the morning, nobody's coming in for gas right now. Okay? Okay?
- Mordecai: [opens a refrigerator] ...Milk...
- Rigby: [opens a cupboard] ...Cereal...
- [They are both at the table and they both pour the milk and cereal into a bowl]
- Mordecai and Rigby: ...Combine.
- [The screen says "REGULAR SHOW CREATED BY J.G. QUINTEL" as movement can be heard, it cuts back to the kitchen, Rigby is about to eat the cereal with his face, but Mordecai stops him]
- Mordecai: [picks up a spoon] This is the only clean spoon left, dude, lets play "punchies" for it.
- Rigby: Okay, me first.
- [Rigby punches Mordecai, but Rigby is shocked at how weak his punch was]
- Mordecai: [starts laughing, then punches Rigby harder]
- Rigby: [rubs his arm] Ow. Take it!
- [Rigby moves to the other side of the table as Mordecai laughs and starts eating his breakfast]
- Mordecai: [stops eating] Man, so far, this job is awesome! I still can't believe we have our own rooms!
- Rigby: Dude, those rooms aren't cool, there's nothing in them, I had to sleep on the floor last night!
- [Rigby starts pouring cereal into his mouth]
- Mordecai: Well, yeah. I mean, we can go and get stuff for it, once we've earned some money! Ya know!
- Rigby: [seems full on cereal] Yeah, I guess.
- Mordecai: You want some milk?
- Rigby: Yeah.
- [Mordecai starts pouring milk into Rigby's mouth]
- [Everybody gets up; the park is ruined]
- Mordecai: Did you win?
- Rigby: [coughs]
- Mordecai: I think you win.
- Rigby: [sighs] It doesn't matter. I wasn't able to hold on to the chair anyways.
- Pops: Look!
- [The half of the chair is still left]
- Mordecai and Rigby: Aww, cool.
- Benson: No you don't! You're not getting that chair. But here's what you do get. You get to flip that cart back over, you're throwin' that chair away, and then you're cleaning up this whole MESS!! Pops, you're comin' with me. And you two idiots, if this isn't cleaned up when I get back, YOU'RE FIRED!!!
- [Benson walks into the house with Pops and Skips]
- Mordecai: Rock-paper-scissors for who gets to drive the cart?
- J. G. Quintel – Mordecai/Hi-Five Ghost
- William Salyers – Rigby
- Sam Marin – Benson/Pops/Muscle Man
- Mark Hamill – Skips
- Minty Lewis – Eileen