ER (season 8)

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ER (1994–2009) is a long running medical drama, airing on NBC, that follows the lives of doctors and nurses in a Chicago emergency room.

Four Corners [8.01]

Jackie Robbins: [about her deceased son] He's still my baby, Peter. I'm supposed to take care of him. I feel like somewhere, sometime, he's going to be sad or cold or scared. Who's taking care of him? Who's being his mother?

Abby: Nice suit! Who died?
Carter: My grandfather.
Abby: Sorry..., I didn't know.

[Abby and Carter are at Carter's grandfather's funeral, and she notices that the birdbath is broken]
Abby: You're going to have some dirty birds.
Carter: Grandpa liked to drive the power lawn mower around.
Abby: Into the birdbath?
Carter: Not on purpose. He was having a fatal MI at the time.
Abby: [laughs] I'm sorry.
Carter: Gotta die somehow. Not a bad way to go. Sunny day, out on the mower. [they both start to laugh] Don't, don't laugh.
Abby: Then stop it!

Mark: [He was]...eaten by dogs.
Elizabeth: Eaten by dogs? In Chicago?
Greene: It happens, a lot! A cop told me.

The Longer You Stay [8.02]

Luka: [After flirting with a waitress] I was trying to have fun. Is that a crime?
Abby: No. Go have fun. If I can be left waiting in the street, I can certainly walk home by myself.
Luka: Why do you have to make such a big problem out of everything. Like you have an insect in your anus?
Abby: Hey, it's "bug up my ass", Luka. 'Bug up my ass." If you're gonna insult me, you can at least get the words right.
Luka: Fine. How's this? Stop being such a bitch.
Abby: OK, fine. As soon as you grow up.
Luka: Right, you're so mature. Abby, you don't even know what you want!
Abby: Yes, I do. I wanna go home.
Luka: You play games like a schoolgirl who can have any boy and treats them all like crap!
Abby: You know, why don't you just call me a whore and get it over with!
Luka: I'm tired of it! You're not that pretty and you're not that special!
Abby: I'm pretty enough in the dark though, aren't I?
Luka: You're never happy! I don't think you're capable of being happy.
Abby: Happy? Six months ago, you didn't care about whether or not I was happy.
Luka: If you're not depressed or ashamed, you're just angry.
Abby: And you're married to a ghost!
Luka: At least I treat you with respect.
Abby: Oh, I know. You're a saint, Luka.

Mark: [When Mark and Elizabeth are changing Ella's diaper] You take care of it. I've got a shift in three hours.
Elizabeth: What do you think I'll be doing in three hours? I'm the feeding trough, remember?
Mark: Elizabeth, if I could breast-feed, I would.
Elizabeth: Oh, great. Great! You take it! Take it all! The sore nipples, the rashes, the hemorrhoids, the leaking in your trauma gown, the public humiliation, the sleep deprivation, the incontinence, for goodness' sake. You take it! It's all yours!

Dave: Look, you didn't answer your page. We had to make a quick decision.
Kerry: You know what? That's your job! You make quick decisions based on the information available. You had the right information. You didn't bother to look at it.
Dave: You've never made a bad call?
Kerry: Not as stupid and lethal as this one.
Dave: Then show up and make it yourself. We paged you three times!
Kerry: In a perfect world, Dr. Malucci, I wouldn't subject any patients to your care. If you knew your ass from your elbow or even gave a damn...
Dave: I do give a damn. I do give a damn.
Kerry: This man might still be alive!

Dr. Edson: Nap Note?
Carter: Yeah. I was supposed to be off last night.
Dr. Edson: Well, you're not in surgery. Don't punish yourself. Go home.
Carter: No, I'm on at noon. I'm just going to go pass out.
Dr. Edson: Bad idea. You know what they say. The longer you stay, the longer you stay.

Abby: Right. I know. You're always so good and I'm always so bad...
Luka: I'm sick of being patient.
Abby: And I'm such a mess and you're so understanding.
Luka: I've put up with a lot, Abby.
Abby: Ah! And I'm a burden.
Luka: Carter, your mother, your moods...
Abby: Why don't you just break up with me?
Luka: I think you want me to.
Abby: If I'm such a horrible person, how could you possibly want to be with me?
Luka: I don't know how to be with you! I don't know how to help you!
Abby: I don't want help! I don't want help. I don't want to be pitied. I don't want to be saved.
Luka: Okay. I give up.
Abby: Okay. What does that mean? What does that mean? What does that mean?
Luka: I'm done! I'm done, okay? Carter can have you!
Abby: Okay.
[walks away from Luka]

Blood Sugar Sex Magic [8.03]

Chen: John did you discharge Ravis?
Carter: Who?
Chen: 22-year-old woman, she was taking birth control pills.
Carter: Yeah, why?
Chen: Weaver took her from me!
Carter: Oh.
Chen: She gave her to you.
Carter: Maybe she thought you were swamped?
Chen: Yeah, more like incompetent.
Carter: She made you Chief Resident, you know, you're the chosen one.
Chen: By default.

Kerry: Doctors are human. We make mistakes.
Romano: If this guy had been properly diagnosed and sent straight to the OR without TNK he'd still be flipping burgers at McDonald's.
Kerry: Marfan's is difficult to detect. The residents have never heard of it.
Romano: Which is why we have attendings.
Kerry: I can't be everywhere at every moment.
Romano: Wrong answer. As we speak, "The Trib" is writing a feature story on this screw-up and the rise in preventable deaths. So you either come up with a better excuse than "doctors are human" or find yourself a good old-fashioned scapegoat.

Dave: Hey, this isn't about my performance, is it? Or my rotations. You just don't like me.
Kerry: You're right. I don't like you. You have no respect for me, your colleagues, this hospital, anything. You like to think you have this whole cowboy approach to medicine, but you don't have the goods to back it up, so you make mistakes. Mistakes that kill people.
Dave: I need this job. You can't fire me. I have a kid to support.
Kerry: Since when? You never said anything about being a father.
Dave: Did you ever ask? You don't know a damn thing about me.
Kerry: I know you're fired.
Dave: You're a sad, cold-hearted bitch, you know that?
Kerry: Someone call Security.
Dave: You may not like me, lady, but nobody here likes you.
Kerry: Get out.
Dave: You wanna know why this damn ER is so important to you, huh? Because it's the only thing you've got in your life. [he takes off his ID badge and throws it at Weaver] Nazi dyke.

Mark: [after Weaver fires Malucci] You can't get rid of him just because the two of you don't get along. Hell, if that were the case, you'd have to fire all of us.
Kerry: You know what? I'm not gonna justify my point of view to you!

Mark: I know growing up can be tough. You can call me anytime.
Rachel Greene: Yeah, until Mom takes away my phone privileges again.
Mark: It'll be okay.
Rachel Greene: No, it won't.
Mark: Rachel, what do you want me to do?
Rachel Greene: You could let me stay here.
Mark: You can't.
Rachel Greene: Why not?
Mark: Your mom would miss you.
Rachel Greene: Right.
Mark: You'd miss your friends.
Rachel Greene: They're only a phone call away. I'll make new ones.
Mark: What about school?
Rachel Greene: They have schools in Chicago. I just want to spend more time with you and Ella. I've got a baby sister who doesn't even know me, and Elizabeth is totally smart and cool. I mean, she's a great role model.
Mark: Are you serious about this?
Rachel Greene: Yes.
Mark: It's a big move.
Rachel Greene: I miss you, Dad.
Mark: I'll talk to your mother.

Never Say Never [8.04]

Mark: [about the scar from his brain surgery] Thought it was cooler than a tattoo.
Susan: You could have at least called me, you know.
Mark: And say what? "Hey, how's it going? By the way, I have a brain tumor."

Chen: [about Weaver] I thought she was going to protect me. She went to protect herself.
Carter: What did you expect?
Chen: I don't know. It never occurred to me that she had to protect her own ass.
Carter: Maybe your asses aren't mutually exclusive.

Kerry: You scheduled meetings with my Residents without telling me?
Romano: I'm sorry. Did you not get the memo?
Kerry: What memo?
Romano: The one that says I run the place.

Kerry: I want you to know I went on record against this, but the administration...
Chen: Am I being fired, Kerry?
Kerry: No. No, no, of course not. You're on a year's probation and subject to a month's suspension without pay. I argued your case to the best of my ability, but Risk Management feels that given your history they needed to take corrective measures to mitigate any further incidents.
Chen: My history?
Kerry: The guide wire.
Chen: God, you're gonna use that?
Kerry: You'll also have to resign your Chief Residency.
Chen: What?
Kerry: I understand how upsetting this must...
Chen: What about you? Are you going to resign anything?
Kerry: My involvement, or lack thereof, is not at issue.
Chen: Yeah, yeah. You made sure of that.
Kerry: Look, this is only a temporary setback, after which you'll be back on track.
Chen: Were you even wearing your pager that night?
Kerry: This isn't about me. Someone obviously misdialed.
Chen: Yeah, just blame everyone but yourself, Kerry.
Kerry: Look, I'm sorry that this had to happen.
Chen: You are not sorry. Just relieved.
Kerry: Jing-Mei, I...
Chen: Go to hell, Kerry. I quit.

Kerry: [about Chen] Look, I'm gonna miss her too. This saddens me too. It's easy for you to be upset and angry when you don't have to manage the situation, but guess what? I'm angry and upset, okay? I mean, I think it sucks only I don't have anyone to complain to.
Mark: You're asking me to feel sorry for you now?
Kerry: No. I just wanted you to know what was going on.

Start All Over Again [8.05]

Mark: First day of school and you're already making new friends?
Susan: Oh, yeah. I'm a shoo-in for homecoming queen.
Greene: So far, so good.
Lewis: Oh, yeah. Foul abscess, a neurotic granny, naked boy here and I had to break into Chen's locker.
Greene: Did you steal her stuff?

Romano: [to Elizabeth] I'm not keeping score, but isn't this your third post-op death this week? Congratulations. We call that a hat-trick.

Denise: Don't drop my baby!
Susan: Don't worry, Dr. Carter used to be in the circus.
Abby: Yeah, as a clown, right?
Carter: Human cannonball. Until I got fired.

Supplies and Demand [8.06]

Abby: I had a life before John Carter. If you want someone with no history, you're gonna have to find yourself a virgin.

Carter: [after trying yoga] I think I twisted my knee doing that damn locust position.
Susan: No, it's "lotus," like the flower.
Carter: Oh, well that explains why it hurts. I was doing the "grasshopper."

Elizabeth: Rachel, you do not want to battle with me. You'll lose, I guarantee it!

If I Should Fall from Grace [8.07]

Gallant: Is there a lost and found box?
Haleh: Yeah, someone stole it.

Susan: I need a psych consult, my patient thinks he's a vampire.
Abby: 'Count Fred'? Where is he?
Susan: Exam 2.
Abby: Is there a nurse in there with him?
Susan: No, why?
Abby: He's a vampire.
Susan: What do you mean he's a vampire?
Abby: I mean he drinks people's blood.
Susan: You're kidding right?
[they look into the exam room and find Fred drinking blood from an IV pack]
Susan: That's nasty.

Gallant: You ever gotten an Erythropoietic porphyria?
Mark: No.
Gallant: What about porphyria cutanea tarda?
Mark: Nope.
Gallant: What's the most unusual medical case you've ever seen?
Mark: I had a guy with a live bullfrog in his ass once.

[Carter tells Susan about his past drug addiction]
Susan: Fentanyl?
Carter: I figured if I'd abuse drugs, I'd abuse a good one.
Carter: Disappointed in me?
Susan: No, no! I'm just... you were stabbed!
Carter: Twice. I don't recommend it.
Susan: [laughs and pauses] Can I see your scar?
Carter: What? No!
Susan: Why not? Don't be bashful.
Carter: No! Get your own.

Susan: [waiting for his grandmother to come home]] Why do I feel like a school kid sitting out here?
Carter: Must be the adolescent sexual tension.
Susan: [chuckles] That's it.
Carter: You know I used to have a crush on you.
Susan: Used to?
Carter: It's all coming back to me now.
Susan: [pauses] I used to have a crush on you too.
Carter: Liar.
Susan: I did! You were cute, real cute, but...
Carter: But?
Susan: Well, you were a med student, I was a resident...
Carter: I'm a resident now.
Susan: Chief Resident.
Carter: That's right. [pauses] I'm glad you came back.
Susan: Me too.
Carter: [after a pause and the sound of a car driving up the driveway, and headlights in their faces] Gamma's home.

Partly Cloudy, Chance of Rain [8.08]

Abby: [exiting the roof elevator, walking toward the medevac helicopter in the pouring rain] Oh, my God! I distinctly heard him!
Mark: Who?
Abby: The weatherman this morning. He said, "partly cloudy, chance of rain."
Mark: Well, he warned you.

Mark: Do you think I'm mean to patients?
Abby: Only the ones who deserve it.
Mark: What about the ones who don't?
Abby: You're nicer than I am.
Mark: That's not much solace.
Abby: Sorry.

Gallant: He [Romano] also told me to stay away from you if I am going to survive medical school.
Kerry: Well, nobody actually listens to Dr. Romano down here.
Gallant: Yeah, I kind of figured that.

Mark: I want to tell you something, but you can't tell any other kids, okay?
Daniel Pendry: Okay.
Mark: Okay. Parents don't always know what they're doing. Just because they're adults doesn't mean they know what's right. In fact, some adults are wrong most of the time.
Daniel Pendry: I know that.
Mark: Good. Then I want you to promise me something.
Daniel Pendry: What?
Mark: Don't listen to them. Don't believe that you're not just as good as your brother. Just as smart, just as special... One day, they may realize that. But you can tell them it doesn't matter, because you already knew. You knew before they did.

Quo Vadis? [8.09]

Abby: This is not the way to get Luka.
Nicole: What are you talking about?
Abby: The truth. What happened to your father?
Nicole: I told you. He killed himself when I was little.
Abby: And then miraculously came back to life again so he could kick you out when you were 16?
Nicole: Is this funny to you?
Abby: No. I'm just trying to figure it out. You haven't told anyone the same story twice.
Nicole: My mother remarried and my stepfather didn't want me around.
Abby: OK, I guess you have an answer for everything.
Nicole: I guess everything's your business.
Abby: I just don't wanna see him hurt.
Nicole: Maybe you just don't want to see him happy.
Abby: I know what won't make him happy. A made-up life. You know, if this is, if this is all for real, that's great. Go for it. But if it's not, he's gonna figure it out. He's not stupid.

Gallant: Is Dr. Benton ever in a good mood?
Elizabeth: He has his moments.

Carter: [Talking about the weirdest places they've had sex] On a train to Seattle.
Susan: Really? With who?
Carter: I was by myself. But it was memorable.

Luka: Are you angry with me?
Nicole: No, of course not.
Luka: Do you think I'm angry with you?
Nicole: I hope not.
Luka: Then why? I thought we both felt the same.
Nicole: You're a good person, but you talked yourself into loving me. This isn't real. I'll leave the key inside.
Luka: I made an OB appointment for Friday.
Nicole: That's not necessary.
Luka: It is.
Nicole: No, it's not. I'm not pregnant. I felt safe for the first time in a long time... I didn't want to lose you. So, I made it up, Luka. I'm sorry. I made it all up. [walks away]

I'll Be Home For Christmas [8.10]

w:Robert Romano (ER)Romano: [to Benton, discussing a written agreement for a reduction in his work schedule] To Whom It May Concern: No frigging way!

Abby: [about Weaver] When is she going on Christmas vacation?
Chuny: Scrooge? Never!

Romano: [to Benton] Are you really going to do this? Throw away your career so you can play Mr. Mom? What a waste!

Carter: Hey, Peter. I'm a good doctor because of you.
Benton: No, you're not. But keep trying.

Beyond Repair [8.11]

Mark: Why is the thermostat in the lounge set at 56?
Frank: Get used to it. We are heading into another ice age. That's what killed the dinosaurs.
Mark: Ice Age didn't kill the dinosaurs, it was cholesterol.

Abby: I haven't seen you around lately.
Luka: I've been working nights.
Abby: How's your Christmas?
Luka: Quiet. What'd you do for New Year's?
Abby: I worked.
Luka: That's always fun.
Abby: Did you make any resolutions?
Luka: Uhm... Help out more.
Abby: Help out more where? Here?
Luka: Uh, no. Europe. I've volunteered to go to Bosnia for two months with [w:Médecins Sans Frontières|Doctors Without Borders]].
Abby: Bosnia?
Luka: Yeah. I speak the language.
Abby: What brought this on?
Luka: I don't know. Change of scenery?

Carter: I got stabbed! I got stabbed in the back! Where the hell were you? You were in the same place you've been my entire life. You were someplace else.
Eleanor Carter: We came back.
Carter: Three weeks later.
Carter: We were stuck in Tokyo, and you said you were fine.
Carter: Well, I wasn't fine, and it wasn't okay.
Eleanor Carter: Are you going to blame me for taking drugs?
Carter: No, I am blaming you for not being my mother! Bobby died and I lost a mother.
Eleanor Carter: May I go to bed now?
Carter: Yeah, run away.

A River in Egypt [8.12]

Kerry: [When Chen asks for her job at County back] No, you know what? You can't screw up and then whine about being mistreated. Jing-Mei, you need to grow up.

Romano: [when Weaver and Chen are arguing] Ladies, ladies, if I wanted to see a good cat fight, I would watch 'The View'. Let's keep this civil.

Abby: So down-low is bisexual?
Carter: No. On the side, secret.
Abby: In the closet?
Carter: No, to be in the closet, you have to be gay.
Abby: He is gay.
Carter: Ah, C.C's gay. Diamond is on the down-low.
Abby: Well, if he's having anal sex with his friend, he's gay.
Carter: Not to him. He's got a girlfriend, he just sorta gets down with his buddy for relief.
Abby: Aha, so down-low means in denial?
Carter: Yeah, basically.

Romano: Dr. Weaver, glad I caught you. [to Gallant] You can go away now.
[Gallant walks away]
Romano: I was going to have you paged, but I couldn't be sure you'd be wearing your pager.
Kerry: Robert, you're not going to be intimidated by these baseless accusations?
Romano: Oh, they have someone on record, Kerry.
Kerry: About what?
Romano: Some waitress at that dump across the street said that you were in there looking for your pager the night Chen and Malucci killed that guy. It's an important detail, don't you think?
Kerry: Robert...
Romano: I don't need to hear it, Kerry. No explanation, no spin. Just fix it.
Kerry: Fix what?
Romano: All she wants is an attending position with standard pay scale and a personal apology from you.
Kerry: No, I... I can't do that.
Romano: Well, there's a first time for everything.
Kerry: I wouldn't have any kind of authority over her.
Romano: We've settled with this dead kid's family. I am not going to open it back up again because you have a management problem created by your own negligence and deceit. She's not interested in taking down you or the hospital. All she wants is her job back. Give it to her today. And super-glue that pager to your forehead if you have to.

Damage is Done [8.13]

Kerry: You know, eventually this has to stop. This attitude, this resentment you have towards me.
Chen: Does it?
Kerry: We have to work together. I can't allow patient care to be compromised because you don't like me.
Chen: I wouldn't let that happen.
Kerry: Good. Because the last thing I need is a divisive medical staff.
Chen: Then maybe you should quit.

Frank: So, you're gay, huh?
Kerry: Yeah, Frank, I'm gay. All right?
Frank: You know you're going to Hell, right?

Chen: John, it's obvious you have a thing for older women.
Carter: What?
Chen: Yeah, Weaver, Lewis and, oh, that pediatric surgeon. What was her name?

Mark: [after Ella is brought into the ER after overdosing on ecstasy] You bring drugs into our house and leave them out for a baby?
Rachel Greene: It wasn't mine.
Mark: Stop lying!
Rachel Greene: I'm not. They were just for a party and I wasn't sure I was going to take them.
Mark: Well, your sister did.
Rachel Greene: But she's going to be okay, though, right? It was just one pill.
Mark: Are you really that stupid? Ella is 9 months old!
'Rachel Greene: I know.
Mark: She almost died.
Rachel Greene: Dad, don't...
Mark: Don't what? Don't call you a liar? Because that's what you are, Rachel. You promised me you weren't doing drugs. She could have long-term brain damage, learning disabilities, low I.Q., memory impairment. She could still die!
Rachel Greene: [starts crying] I know, Dad. Please, please, Dad, I... I'm sorry. I'm... Dad, I'm... Daddy, I'm sorry. [cries into Mark's arms; Mark comforts her]

Carter: [When his mother is spending time with a young boy with cancer] Mom, he has leukemia.
Eleanor Carter: I know that.
Carter: And he may not survive. Look, if you've got some kind of twisted need to relive this, that's fine. I'm not going to do it again. I made my peace a long time ago.

A Simple Twist of Fate [8.14]

Joyce: I don't want to go to a shelter. I want to go home!
Abby: [after Brian beat her and broke her cheekbone] What if you have a kid with him?! Is this what you want for your children? You want him to beat them the way he did you?!
Joyce: He wouldn't do that-
Abby: Oh, wake up, Joyce! This is it! This is your chance to get away! Right now. It doesn't matter how 'wonderful' he can be sometimes! If you go back now, you are telling him it's okay to do this to you, and it is NOT okay! [pause, more gently] It's not okay.

[After Abby is beaten up by Brian, Luka enters a bar. He sees Brian on the phone; Brian sees him advancing and hangs up quickly]
Brian: I don't have a problem with you, man, ok-
Luka: I have a problem with you.
Brian: I got angry- It was a mistake.
Luka: You hit women by mistake? Huh?
Brian: I screwed up!
[Luka swats the beer bottle out of his hand; it shatters on the floor]
Luka: Let's see you hit me, huh? [shoves Brian back and continues advancing]
Brian: I didn't mean to, come on- [Luka slaps him] I lost my temper!
Luka: Lose your temper with me! [shoves Brian back into the pool-cue rack; the bar goes quiet]
Brian: Ok, I'm gonna go to the cops right now and turn myself in- [Luka socks him in the jaw, then grabs him and yanks him upright] Wait, just wait!
Luka: Better start swinging back! [shoves him back and punches him again]
Brian: Wait!! [in tears] I was wrong, I got angry- She took away my wife!
[Luka punches him in the stomach, doubling him over, then hoists him upright again]
Luka: You took away your wife! (throws Bryan against the pool table)
Brian: [sobbing and bleeding from his mouth] I know, I know, I know... but I loved her! She was everything to me, and I lost her- [Luka grabs him by the collar and raises his fist] I'm sorry, I'm so sorry! I won't mess with Abby again. I won't. [pause] I won't even talk to her. I'll move, I'll move out of the building! Please, I'm sorry. Please...
[Luka lets go for a moment, then suddenly grabs him and leans forward until they are eye-to-eye]
Luka: [quietly] You touch her again... I'll kill you.

Carter: [When Eleanor leaves the room after Mickey starts vomiting blood] Mom, what are you doing?
Eleanor Carter: I can't. Please, take care of him...
Carter: No, the only reason I'm here is 'cause you asked for my help.
Eleanor Carter: I can't see him in that kind of pain, not again...
Carter: What did you expect?
Eleanor Carter: I don't know.
Carter: You cannot get this kid's hopes up and then leave.
[Eleanor heads for the elevator]
Carter: You're really going to do this? You're gonna drag me back here and then bail when it gets too tough? The kid does not think he'll have to go through this alone again. Don't leave him!

Rachel Greene: [to Elizabeth about the ecstasy] I was thinking about taking one at a party. They were in my bag. I forgot about it. I'm so sorry. I know there's nothing I can do to make it right.
Elizabeth: You can leave. You can pack up your things and leave my house.
Rachel Greene: I... I have to call my mom.
Elizabeth: Then call her.

Mark: I am not choosing between my two daughters.
Elizabeth: You don't have to. I'm choosing for you.
Mark: And what am I telling her by letting you ship her away?
Elizabeth: That she needs to grow up. That she needs to take responsibility. That what she does has very real consequences for people besides herself!
Mark: She realizes that. Do you think she would actually hurt Ella again?
Elizabeth: Either she's out of the house by the time I take that baby home or I'm not taking that baby home!
Mark: Hold on, calm down. Take a breath before you start issuing ultima...
Elizabeth: She's my child, Mark!
Mark: I know that! She's mine, too!
Elizabeth: Then start acting like it!
[storms off]

It's All in Your Head [8.15]

Abby: You look tired.
Luka: Yeah, I was up late.
Abby: Oh really, what's her name?
Luka: Who?
Abby: It's a joke, Luka.
Luka: No, seriously, if you need a place...
Abby: Thank you.
Luka: You can stay as long as you need, and you only have to sleep with me on the weekends.
Abby: Excuse me?
Luka: It's a joke, Abby. It's a joke.

Frank: [to Abby] You know lawyers; they're half as smart as doctors, but twice as sneaky.

Chen: You give a guy a hand release during Harry Potter and he wants to marry you!

Carter: And last but not least is the lovely, but sort of spooky, Miss Armstrong in 2, who's waiting on a psych consult before the sewer people come and get her.
Chen: What sewer people?
Carter: She's crazy, Deb. Hence the psych consult.

Secrets and Lies [8.16]

Carter: Reality television: it's one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Abby: Have you ever watched it?
Carter: No.
Abby: Then shut up.
Carter: I just think that TV is a vast wasteland.
Abby: Oh I'm sorry I meant to watch 'La Boheme' on PBS last night but I had to go the symphony.
Carter: I watch television, just not that dehumanizing crap. Seriously, what's next? Televised executions? Bear Baiting? Torture Channel?

Abby: How did you manage to last this long without some girl marrying you?
Carter: We come with a built-in gold-digger alarm. My grandmother installs them at birth.
Susan: And I haven't set it off? You'd better have that thing checked.

Carter: It's embarrassing. Everybody assumes when you grow up with money everything's great.
Susan: Yeah, it must have been hard growing up in the mansion. Was Gamma too cheap to heat the pool?

[Luka and Carter have found some fencing equipment and are dueling each other]
Abby: Do you think they're trying to impress us?
Susan: If they are, it's not working. [Luka and Carter clash, and Carter thrusts his foil-point against Luka's chest, winning the first bout] Ouch! Doesn't that hurt?
Abby: They really are a pair of freaks.
Susan: They really are. [laughs] And to think, you slept with both of them!
Abby: Ah, I- never slept with Carter. He tell you that?
Susan: [surprised] I thought you had!
Abby: No- that was a rumor that Carter started.
Susan: [stares at Carter] Oh, God! That is low! [Luka wins the next bout]
Abby: I thought so.
Susan: I haven't slept with Carter either.
Abby: How long have you guys been going out?
Susan: Couple of months.
Abby: Well, that definitely violates the second date rule.
Susan: What second date rule?
Abby: My friend has this theory that you should sleep with the guy by the second date because if the sex isn't good, you shouldn't waste your time with someone you don't have any chemistry with.
Susan: [nods thoughtfully] Hmm. Well, I don't know if Carter and I have any chemistry or not. There have been some almost spark moments.
Abby: I think it's either there, or it's not. You can't force it- believe me, I've tried.
Susan: I think part of the problem with Carter and me is you. He denies it, but it's not really convincing. What did you two have?
Abby: [shrugs] Timing.

Luka: We're all waiting, for what? Fulfillment, love... validation, approval? It's a waste of time. Life is an empty, hollow exercise filled with pain, loss and grief, and the only thing we can expect to achieve in our lives is our own, inevitable death.

Bygones [8.17]

[Romano walks into the lounge and sees that Elizabeth is crying]
|Romano: What's wrong, is Prince Harry in rehab again?
Elizabeth: Mark's tumor's back. [pause, Romano looks more sympathetic]
Romano: We always knew it was a possibility.
Elizabeth: He's known about it for weeks, and he didn't tell me.
Romano: Maybe he was trying to protect you.

Romano: Is he your husband?
Elizabeth: Yes.
Romano: Do you love him?
Elizabeth: Yes.

Orion in the Sky [8.18]

Pratt: Do I seem like a punk to you?
Mark: No.
Pratt: Then how about you stop trying to treat me like one.

Mark: Mrs. Raskin. It's been a long time.
Mrs. Raskin: The service isn't what it used to be.
Mark: What seems to be the matter?
Mrs. Raskin: I have this hangnail and it's very painful.
Mark: I have a brain tumor and it's inoperable.
Mrs. Raskin: What?
Mark: I win.

Mark: Never let your work become your life, Kerry.

Brothers & Sisters [8.19]

Kerry: Who let Reverend Ed in?
Gallant: You know the preacher?
Kerry: He's a holy pain in the ass. Get rid of him.
Gallant: Me?
Kerry: In about 10 minutes, he's going to start trying to heal people. It's bad for business.

Pratt: I need to clamp off the aorta with... that big-ass clamp!
Carter: If you don't know what it's called, then you sure as hell shouldn't be using it!

Pratt: You can do the rectal.
Gallant: The rectal?
Carter: Play nice, kids. Don't make me stop this trauma.

Luka: [about Abby] She's a big girl, Carter.
Carter: Yeah, with a drinking problem.
Luka: I don't tell people how to live.
Carter: She was living in your house.
Luka: I didn't make her start drinking again.
Carter: You didn't stop her.
Luka: She's not a drunk.
Carter: Yes, she is. Are you stupid or do you just not give a damn about her? Or do you want her to keep drinking, is that it? You like 'em a little vulnerable so you can play the caring brooding comforter?
Luka: Don't push your luck, Carter.
Carter: What are you gonna do? Beat me up? You're gonna bash my head into the ground?
Luka: Get out of my way.
Carter: If you're not helping her, you're hurting her.

Elizabeth: Robert.
Romano: Not now, Lizzie. I am not having a good day. I got spanked in the stock market, some moron from Radiology backed into my Jag and I just spent several hours putting that ER victim back together.
Elizabeth: I need some time off.
Romano: And I need a month in the south of France with Vietnamese twins. It's not gonna happen.
Elizabeth: It's Mark. He's sick.
Romano: I thought he was in Tahiti.
Elizabeth: Hawaii. He's got worse. I don't think he's going to be able to fly home.
Romano: You better go to him.
Elizabeth: I don't know how long I'll be.
Romano: I'll survive.
Elizabeth: Thanks.
Romano: Anything I can do?
Elizabeth: Pray.
Romano: It's not exactly my strong suit, but in this case, I'll make an exception.

The Letter [8.20]

w:Kerry Weaver (Kerry: Mark's gone. That means you've been here longer than any other doctor. People will look to you to step in and fill the void.
Carter: Big void.

Carter: [reading a letter from Mark] Dear ER Gang, So here I am, out on the beach at 5:30 in the evening. Elizabeth is drinking juice, but I'm all about the Mai Tai's. The sun is going down, Rachel is dipping Ella's toes in the ocean as they head off on their quest for the perfect seashell. Weirdly enough, I find myself thinking, you know what would make this moment complete? Some jogger dropping to the sand, short of breath, so I can sweep in with a piece of bamboo to perform a nice, clean intubation, fix the guy up, and send him off with a good, simple dispo. Which I guess is my way of saying I miss you all and that dingy place. Lots of times I thought I should have chosen a different career or gone into private practice, something easier, less grinding, more lucrative, but since I've been gone, I realize that outside of doing what I'm doing right now, sitting on this beach with my family, staying at County all those years, doing what we do on a daily basis was the best choice I ever made. I know what you're thinking, but trust me, it's not hard to appreciate once it's over. As much as a part of me would like to believe that the ER can't go on without me, the smarter part realizes that you are an incredible group of doctors and nurses who approach every day with such skill, compassion and thoroughness, that when it comes to patient care, I know my absence will hardly be felt. In order to leave, I had to go the way I did, but I wouldn't want any of you to think that I didn't value each of you and the years we worked together, or that I didn't have things of a more personal nature to say. Most of you, I think, have an idea of what those things might be without me writing them down, but still... Ella is laughing and waving for me. Rachel found her shell. Mark. [a footnote from Elisabeth] Mark died this morning at 6:04 a.m. The sun was rising, his favorite time of day. I sent this on so that you might know he was thinking of you all and that he appreciated knowing you would remember him well.

Romano: Amazing how the human body can turn on itself. The very process we need to grow in the womb, to regenerate ourselves, systematically eating us alive. But no-one's sacred. Little girls. Fathers with little girls. Cancer. Brain cancer, liver cancer, breast cancer. It's the same traitor. The merciless unrelenting predator. Like time itself.

[After Gallant gets sick during a trauma, Carter repeats what Mark told him in the same situation eight years ago.]
Gallant: You know, sometimes I don't think I can do this.
Carter: You know, there's two kinds of doctors. There's the kind that get rid of their feelings, and the kind that hold on to them. If you hold on to your feelings, you're going to get sick every once in a while. It's part of it. You know, people come in here, and they're sick, and they're bleeding, sometimes they're dying. And they need our help. And helping them is more important than how we feel. But hell, I've been doing this eight years, I still get sick. Take another minute.

On the Beach [8.21]

Mark: I'd get here at 6 a.m., sweep up, mop the locker rooms, skim the pool. $1.25 an hour.
Rachel Greene: That's slave wages.
Mark: It was enough to keep me in new records and good weed.
[Rachel looks at Mark, surprised]
Mark: What? You know, records, LPs, vinyls. Those funny, big black things that your hip-hop heroes are always ripping off for their songs.

Mark: [Reading his bucket list to Elizabeth] Start a rock band and end up on the cover of Rolling Stone magazine.
Elizabeth: Do you even play an instrument?
Mark: No, but I always wanted to trash a hotel room.

Mark: Rachel, damn it, stop. I love you. Please, don't do this. I don't, I don't know what to do. I don't have time to work this through. I'm not gonna be here in a year to help. You got a bastard of a father who was never around and then went off and had a new baby. Your mom got remarried to a creep. She works too much. You got a raw deal, all right? Why not get high? No one gives a damn about you anyway. I know how that feels. I remember being fourteen and pissed off at my dad and the world. What are you gonna do when I'm not here? Who is gonna keep you from killing yourself?

Elizabeth: Your father's dying.
Rachel Greene: I know that.
Elizabeth: He's going to die soon. Very soon. If you keep on like this, you're gonna miss what little time you have left with him. This is it, Rachel. This is your last chance. And if you blow it, you're gonna end up hating yourself for the rest of your life.

Mark: I was trying to figure out what I should have already told you, but I never have. Something important, something every father should impart to his daughter. I finally got it: generosity. Be generous, with your time, with your love, with your life.
Rachel Greene: Okay.
Mark: I'm sorry, Rachel. I'm so tired.
Rachel Greene: It's okay.
Mark: Don't cry for me.
Rachel Greene: I won't.
Mark: Be generous...always.
Rachel Greene: I will. Daddy. I remember the lullaby. I remember you used to sing it to me every night. I remember.

Lockdown [8.22]

Carter: Abby is the Obi-Wan Kenobi of nursing.
Pratt: What does that make you, Yoda?
Carter: Learn from her you will.

[Jerry is talking to the news media over the phone]
Jerry: ...And we think that this may be smallpox.
[Susan catches him]
[[w:Susan Lewis|Susan]: Jerry?
Jerry: I'm just... talking to my mom.

Carter: [Attending to two lawyers with burns on the bottoms of their feet] Why walk on hot coals?
Male Lawyer: It was a bonding exercise. We're partners at the same firm.
Female Lawyer: [Annoyed] It was a stupid idea. If I could walk, I'd kick your ass!

Abby: Tell me everything's going to be okay.
[Carter kisses her]
Carter: Everything's going to be okay.