Total Drama Island

From Wikiquote
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Not so Happy Campers - Part 1[edit]

Chris McLean: Welcome back to "Total Drama Island". All right, It's time to meet our first 11 campers. We told them they'd all be staying at a five star resort, so if they seem a little T.O.ed, that's probably why. Beth, what's up?
Beth: It's so Incredulous to meet you. Wow! You're much shorter in real life.
Chris McLean: Uh, thanks. DJ.
DJ: Yo, Chris McLean. how's it going? Hey, you sure you got the right place here? Where's the hot tub at?
Chris McLean: Yo, dawg, this is it. Camp Wawanakwa.
DJ: Humph. Looked a lot different on the application form.
Chris McLean: Hey, Gwen.
Gwen: You mean we're staying here?
Chris McLean: No, you're staying here. My crib is an airstream with A.C. That-a-way.
Gwen: I did not sign up for this.
Chris McLean: Actually, you did.
(Gwen takes some assignment papers from Chris and she rips some assignment papers)
Chris McLean: The great thing about lawyers is...they make lots of copies.
Gwen: I am not staying here.
Chris McLean: Cool. I hope you can swim though, because your ride just left.
[Boat horn honking]
Gwen: Jerk!
Geoff: Chris McLean! Sup, man? It's an honor to meet you, man!
Chris McLean: The Geoff-ster. Welcome to the island, man!
Geoff: Thanks, man.
Gwen: If they say "man" one more time, I'm gonna puke.
Chris McLean: Everybody, this is Lindsay. Not too shabby.
Lindsay: Hi. Okay, you look so familiar!
Chris McLean: I'm Chris McLean. The host of the show.
Lindsay: Oh, that's where I know you from.
Chris McLean: Uh, Yeah. Heather.
Beth: Hi! looks like we're your new friends for the next 8 weeks.
Chris McLean: Duncan, dude.
Duncan: I don't like surprises.
Chris McLean: Yeah, Your parole officer warned me about that, man. He also told me to give him a holler any time and have you returned to juvie.
Duncan: Okay, then. Meet you by the campfire, gorgeous.
Heather: Drop dead, you skeez. I'm calling my parents, you cannot make me stay here.
[Boat horn honking]
Chris McLean: Ladies and gentlemen, Tyler!
[all gasps]
Heather: Ugh! my shoes!
Chris McLean: Wicked wipeout, man! [snickers]
Harold: [sighs]
Chris McLean: Welcome to camp, Harold.
Beth: What's he looking at?
Harold: So you mean this show is at a crappy summer camp and not on some big stage or something?
Chris McLean: You got it.
Harold: Yes. That is so much more favorable to my skills.
Chris McLean: Contestant number 9, is Trent.
Trent: Hey, good to meet you, man. I saw you on that figure-skating show. nice work!
Chris McLean: Hey, thanks, man. I knew I rocked that show!
Beth: I saw that. one of the guys dropped his partner on her head, so they got immunity that week.
Harold: Lucky! I hope I get dropped on my head.
Lindsay: Me too!
Trent: So, this is it? All righty then.
Bridgette: Hey! What's up?
Chris McLean: Alright. our surfer chick, Bridgette, is here!
Duncan: [scoffs] Nice board. This ain't malibu, honey.
Bridgette: I thought we were going to be on a beach.
Chris McLean: We are!
Bridgette: [sighs] Great.
Chris McLean: Alright, that makes--(get hit by Bridgette's surfboard) Ow! Darn it, that hurt!
Bridgette: Hey, Guys.
Geoff: Hey! I'm Geoff.
Bridgette: What's up?
Harold: Dang, watch the board, man!
Beth: Hi! I'm Beth.
Bridgette: Hey.
Heather: Okay, We've all met surfer girl. can we get on with the show, please?
Duncan: Someone missed their double Cappuccino Macchiato this morning.
Heather: Get bent.
Chris McLean: camper is Noah.
Noah: You got my memo about my life threatening allergies?
Chris McLean: I'm sure someone did.
Noah: Good. Is this where we're staying?
Duncan: No, It's your mother's house, and we're throwing a party.
Noah: Cute. Nice piercings, original, do them yourself?
Duncan: Yeah. You want one?
Noah: Uh, no, thanks. Can I have my lip back, please? Thanks.
LeShawna: What's up, y'all? LeShawna's in the house!
Harold: [gasps]
LeShawna: Yo, baby, hey, how you doing? How's it going? Feel free to quit now and save yourselves the trouble, 'cause I came to win. oh, what's up, my brother? Give me some sugar, baby!
Harold: I've never seen a girl like you in real like before.
LeShawna: Excuse me?
Harold: You're real big and loud.
LeShawna: What did you say to me? Oh, no, you didn't. You have not seen anything yet. I'll show you big, baby. Oh, yeah, you want some of this? Well, come on, then!
Chris McLean: Alright, campers. settle down.
Chris McLean: Ladies! Sadie, Katie, welcome to your new home for 8 weeks.
[Insects buzzing]
Katie: Oh, my gosh. Sadie, look. It's a summer camp.
Sadie: Okay, I always wanted to go to summer camp. Eee!
Chris McLean: Ezekiel! What's up, man?
Ezekiel: I think I see a bird.
Trent: [laughs]
Chris McLean: Okay, look, dude. I know you don't get out much. Been home-schooled your whole life, raised by freaky prairie people, just don't say much and try not to get kicked off too early, okay?
Ezekiel: Yes, sir.
Gwen: That's
Chris McLean: Cody. The Code-ster. The Code-meister.
Cody: Dude, Psyched to be here, man. I see the ladies have already arrived. All right.
LeShawna: Save it, short stuff.
Chris McLean: Eva? Nice. I glad you could make it.
Cody: Ow! What's in there, dumbbells?
Eva: Yes.
Duncan: She's all yours, man.
Owen: Woo-hoo! Chris, What's happening? [laughs] This is awesome! Woo-hoo!
Chris McLean: Owen, welcome!
Chris McLean: Awesome to be here, man. Yeah! Man, this is just so...
Gwen: Awesome?
Owen: Yes, Awesome! Woo! Are you gonna be on my team?
Gwen: Oh, I sure hope so.
Owen: Woo!
Chris McLean: You about finished?
Owen: Sorry, dude. I'm just so psyched!
Chris McLean: Cool. And here comes Courtney.
Courtney: Thank you. Hi! you must be the other contestants. It's really nice to meet you all.
Owen: How's it going? I'm Owen.
Courtney: Nice to meet you, O...Wow.
Chris McLean: This is Justin. Welcome to Total Drama Island.
Justin: Thanks, Chris. This is great.
Chris McLean: Just so you know, we picked you based entirely on you looks.
Justin: I can deal with that.
Owen: I like your pants.
Justin: Thanks, man.
Owen: 'Cause they look like they're all worn out. Did you buy them like that?
Justin: Uh, no. Just had them for a while.
Owen: Oh. Cool. Stupid!
Chris McLean: Hey, everyone, Izzy!
Izzy: Hi, Chris. Hi! Hi! Ow!
Tyler: Ooh, that was bad. [laughs]
Courtney: Guys, she could be seriously hurt!
Izzy: That felt so...good! Except for hitting my chin. This is summer camp? That is so cool! Do you have papier-mâché here? Are we having lunch soon?
Owen: That is a good call!

Not so Happy Campers - Part 2[edit]

Courtney: I am gonna win this competition! And no one is gonna stop me!

The Big Sleep[edit]

Gwen: Don't walk beside me.
Heather: Do you mind?

Owen: Can't....catch....breathe....must....have....condition.
Heather: Yeah, It's called "overeating". Look into it.
LeShawna: What's your excuse, you skinny, annoying...oh, I'm too tired for insults.
Chris McLean: Pick it up, people! If you're not back by dinnertime, you don't eat!
Heather: Ugh, I hate him so much.

Eva: ARRRGGGGHHHHH! Where is my MP3 player!? One of you must have stolen it I need my music! No one is going anywhere until I get my MP3 player back.
Courtney: OK, whoever took it better give it up now before she destroys the whole camp.
Heather: Hey, guys. Wow, this place is a real mess.
Courtney: Someone stole Eva's MP3 player.
Heather: You don't mean this, do you? I was wondering who it belong to. I found it by the campfire pit, you must have dropped it.
Eva: Oh, thank you! Thank you, thank you!
Heather: Sure thing.

Courtney: To the Killer Bass. And to NOT end up here again next week.


Tyler: Oh, you're going down! We're gonna bring the dinner to the table, and then we're gonna eat it!

Heather: Why don't you dodge this?! [she throws a canoe to hit Tyler]
Tyler: Ow!

(After Harold wins the dodgeball challenge for the Bass)
Chris: Gophers, what happened?
Noah: What can I say? Weak effort.
Gwen: Oh shut it, Noah.
Heather: You know, for once I agree with her.

Not Quite Famous[edit]

Lindsay: (obviously playing diversion) Gwen! It's you! Hi! What are you doing here, outside the cabin, Gwen?
Gwen: Trying to get into the cabin.
Lindsay: Oh, you're trying to get into the cabin! That's very interesting! Wait, stay here! We can get tans together, and you could totally use one!

The Sucky Outdoors[edit]

[Courtney sighs]
Duncan: Morning, sunshine.
Courtney: (gasps) Oh my gosh! EW! You were cuddling me!
Duncan: I was calmly lying on my back and trying to catch my few Z's. You were snuggling at me.
Courtney: You are such an ogre.
Duncan: I've been called worse.
Courtney: Ugh!

Phobia Factor[edit]

Bridgette: Katie would want you to keep going. (Sadie crying) Come on, let's go back and join the others!

Up The Creek[edit]

Izzy: Come on, the race isn't over yet! We still have to burn stuff.

Leshawna: You cost us the game! You are dead!

Paintball Deer Hunter[edit]

Heather: What took you so long?!
Beth: Here. I hope you know what I had to go through to get those.
Heather: There's like...11 chips left! [sniffing] And they're barbecue! Go exchange them for dill pickle!
Beth: No.
Heather: What did you just say?
Cody: I'm just gonna...yeah.
Heather: Take it back!
Beth: NO!
Heather: Take, it, back!
Beth: No! I'm tired of being your slave! Now if you'll excuse me, I have a challenge to complete!
Heather: Ouch! Whoever you are, this is so not cool! Oh!

Lindsay: Wait, I have blueberries, see? Oh, oh.
Heather: Follow me.

Heather: Hey, Beth!
Sadie: Huh?
Beth: Oh, I totally had her.
Heather: We've been talking about you.
Lindsay: We have?
Heather: Zip it! Linds-iot. We decided to give you one last chance. If you take it back, you can rejoin our alliance.
Beth: Take back what?
Heather: The "n" word, "no".
Beth: I don't want to take it back.
Heather: You are nothing without me!
Beth: Do you why we keep losing challenges?
Heather: (in Canadian dub) Because they're lame and foolish?(in USA and UK dubs) Because they're lame and stupid?
Beth: No, Because you're so busy being mean that you don't even try. Now all you can think of is bossing us around!
Heather: [gasps]
Beth: Oh! That's it!
Heather: Bring it, dweeb!

(Beth and Heather face off with each other)
Heather: I am giving you one last chance.
Beth: Why? Because you know you can't win without your little alliance?
Heather: I can make your life miserable here!
Beth: You already do, miss, "Come put lotion on my nasty alligator skin." What do I have to lose?
LeShawna: 2 hours of sneaking around in the woods, and I haven't shot a darn thing. what kind of messed up person actually does this for fun?
Heather: Fine. be all alone then, loser!
Beth: It's better than working for you.
Heather: Bring it, dweeb!
Beth: Oh! That's it!
Heather: Ow! Who was that!?
LeShawna: Oh, I knew I should have gone to the optometrist before I came out here. Sorry about that.
Heather: You! Give me your gun! give it! OW! Charlie horse!
LeShawna: Girl, you crazy.
Beth: It just looked like a lot of fun when you did it.
[LeShawna and Beth laughing]
Heather: Stop laughing!

Heather: Give me that! (takes Lindsay's paintball gun and shoots at Beth and Leshawna)
Beth: Oh, not is so on!
(Beth, Leshawna, and Heather shoot their paintballs to each other)

If You Can't Take The Heat...[edit]

Heather: This is how you flambé! Step 1: Pour the flambé, which you did manage. Step 2, of 2: Light it! (Gwen laughs) Aaah! My eyebrows! Owen!
Owen: Is it finally lunch time?
Heather: No! Go get my makeup bag from the cabin!
Owen: But, the bees!
Heather: NOW!
Leshawna: Excuse me, I need a bathroom break.
Heather: Well, evidently, I need new eyebrows. But we don't always get what we want, do we? Ugh! It's like I'm on a team of losers!

Courtney: I'm like the most easy going person I know!
Duncan: Oh yeah, you're totally laid back.

Lindsay: It's Heather's recipe. (Gasps) Oh my gosh, she's still in the fridge!

Who Can You Trust[edit]

Chris McLean: Muy caliente!

Duncan: This bites.

DJ: Big time.

Chris: Is anyone going to help this guy?

Geoff: Last one in is a rotten blowfish!

Geoff: Oh, come ON!

Chris McLean: Ahhh...Nuts!

Courtney: You're...going...down...

Gwen: Sometimes the universe just gives you a freebie.

Basic Straining[edit]

Chef Hatchet: Twenty-five of us went into the jungle that night. Only five came back out.

Courtney: I do not concede! I do not concede!

X-Treme Torture[edit]

Gwen: Did you ever think that maybe Trent's doing this as a form of self expression... like haiku?

Harold: Give daddy some sugar.

Gwen and Bridgette: Leshawna's the crush girl?
Leshawna: You two know someone else here with a booty as luscious as an apple?
Gwen: But who wrote it?

Duncan: The chick was determined!

Leshawna: Wait a minute. [to Harold on the Losers boat] Who's boobies did you see?!
(Heather exits the mobile shower; Leshawna turns around furiously)
Leshawna: Uh, uh. Uh, uh, uh, uh, oh, oh, oh. Oh, see now, you messed with the wrong sister!
Heather: Oh, please. It was a total fluke. You think I'd actually showed that dweeb my boobs on purpose?
(Leshawna angrily walks up to Heather and Heather starts to run away from her, screaming)
Leshawna: Get back here!
Gwen: Well, that's settled. Goodnight.
Bridgette: Goodnight.

Brunch of Disgustingness[edit]

Bridgette: But, dolphins are our friends!
Heather: What are you waiting for? It's already dead. If you don't eat it, we don't win!
Bridgette: (whimpers) I can't. I'm a surfer. I swim with dolphins!
Heather: Eat it!!
Bridgette: No! I'm not doing it! You can't pressure me!
D.J.: I'm with you sister. I ain't eatin' no dolphin.

No Pain, No Game[edit]

Leshawna: (Confessional) Pfft. Those should've been my alligator elbows gettin the hand in foot treatment!

Leshawna: Oh-ho-ho, I am feelin' that. Bring it on Chris.

[In the girls' cabin]
Eva: What's with the tape? Somebody better answer me.
Leshawna: Me and Heather here got a little territorial. But we're all cool now. Right, Heather?
Heather: (tears tape off the floor) Absolutely. Want my bunk, Eva?
Eva: I want this one. (knocks down Bridgette's surfboard) Unless miss "backstabbing traitor who voted me off" has a problem with that.
Leshawna: Okay, you know what, you can get all up in her face but don't forget we're all here to win.
Eva: Oh, yeah, you've got that right, girlfriend.
Leshawna: Oh! oh, oh, tell me the macho mama with butt cheeks tighter than my weave did not just say that.
Gwen: (breaks up their argument) Whoa! Time-out.
Lindsay: Can't we talk this out over low-cal snacks?
Eva: Whatever. I'm still gonna win!

Search and Do Not Destroy[edit]

Chris McLean: Duncan's tough exterior seems to help him with the challenge he received.

Izzy: Aww, well you sure are cute. And feisty too!

Chris McLean: DJ seems a little out of his league

Chris McLean: Back in the communal washrooms, things are starting to pile up.

Chris McLean: You know the routine. Whoever doesn't get a marshmallow, it's curtains for you.

Gwen: [Confessional] Jerk!
Trent: [Confessional] User!
Gwen: [Confessional] I thought we had...
Trent: [Confessional] Something real. Man, was I ever wrong.

Trent: I want you to be tough and fight to the end. For both of us. I'll be watching and cheering for you back home.

Hide and Be Sneaky[edit]

Lindsay: The entire viewing world who?

That's Off The Chain![edit]

Gwen: This week.
Lindsay: You really ARE mean! And all that bad stuff people say about you is true, like how you're a two-faced, backstabbing, lying little [bleep]! I always told them they were wrong. I stood up for you because I thought we were BFFs! But they're right! You really are a two-faced, backstabbing, lying little [bleep]! And guess what? I don't wanna be BFFs anymore. I'd rather spend the day staring at Owen's butt than shopping with you! And PS, your shoes are tacky!
Gwen: Yeah, you tell her.
Owen: (laughing)

Lindsay: (Confessional) I don't know what came over me. Oh wait, yes I do! Heather's a total [bleep]!

Hook, Line & Screamer[edit]

Gwen: Here comes the blood fest!

Heather: DJ! It's me! Heather.

Owen: If this was a stunt, would Chris leave behind, his hair gel?!

Owen: It was a joke. Too funny. I was all, "AHHHH", and you were all, "EEEEE".

Owen: Owen's not getting to second base, is he?
Izzy: (Shakes head)
Owen: First base?
Izzy: (Shakes head again)
Owen: Didn't think he getting up to ba- (Izzy punches Owen in the face)

Wawanakwa Gone Wild![edit]

Chris: Your challenge is to trap an animal.
Duncan: (grabs Owen's arm) Got one!
Chris: A wild animal.

Trial by Tri-Armed Triathlon[edit]

Geoff: You've never been to a party?
Gwen: No, okay? Sometimes I wish I had been. That for just one day I could be one of those happy, vapid girls who gets along with everyone, and who is all excited to eat massive amounts of sugar, and do karaoke, and cheerleading and ponytails. I just don't think it's in my DNA.

Haute Camp-Ture[edit]

Ezekial: Dude, why are you helping him? He's a traitor, eh.

Courtney: I don't care how nice this place is, I'm not supposed to be here. After I was kicked off, I found out exactly what happened on the night, I was eliminated.

Noah: Did I get anything out of this experience? No. It was completely and totally uneventful.
Izzy: He kissed a guy!
Noah: No, I didn't!
Izzy: Yes, you did.
Noah: Didn't.
Izzy: Did!
Noah: Did! Not!
Izzy: Did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did!
Trent: Ahem. I can break this tie. He totally did.
(flashback to Noah kissing Cody's ear during the awake-athon challenge)

Izzy: C'mon, guys! NO ONE SAY "LESHAWNA"!

Parrot: Awk! LeShawna!
Everyone: NO!!

Camp Castaways[edit]

Heather: Hey you two, if you’re done yelling at each other I found us a place to rest. (gasp) Aah! Aaaaaahhhhh!

Are We There, Yeti?[edit]

Owen: It's all good except one thing's missing... foooooood!

Gwen: (Confessional) I've got to admit, I didn't think I'd make it this far; but now that I have, I might as well win.

I Triple Dog Dare You[edit]

Chris McLean: Ooh, you're not gonna like this one. Have your head-shaved by Chef!
Heather: WHAT!?

The Very Last Episode, Really![edit]

Chris McLean: bruh moment.

Leshawna: (Angrily) That's It! I had about enough of that girl!

Alternate Ending

[Gwen eventually passes Owen, crossing the finish line, winning the race]
Gwen: I won? I won!
Trent: I knew you can do it! (Trent and Gwen smiles)
Owen: So there won't be a party?
[Lindsay starts to cry]: WAAAHAHAHAHOOOO

Total Drama Drama Drama Drama Island[edit]

Heather: (Confessional) Okay, I know it may look like I'm desperate for a partner. But that's only because...okay, I'm desperate for a partner. But Harold? That is even worse than the mathletes! That's like...ugh...spending the afternoon with the Physics Club!

Noah: Sorry, I forgot my ROIDS at the gym!

Eva: Watch it! It's a trap!
Noah: Justin. The anti-me. So we meet again.
Izzy: Whatever you guys do, don't look him in the eyes! He has powers.
Justin: Give me the case.
Izzy: Back off, really hot guy!
Justin: I didn't want to have to do this, but you leave me no choice. (Takes off his shirt)

Tyler: Now give us the case, or I'll mess you up!
Justin: No.
(Awkward pause)
Tyler: What do we do now?

Cody: Courtney, save us! Pull us up!
Courtney: Give me the case, and I will!
Tyler: No way!
Courtney: Okay then! (Goes higher)
DJ: You wouldn't let us fall to our deaths!
Courtney: Oh yes, I would! I don't even like you very much!

Voice Cast[edit]

Christian Potenza - Chris McLean
Clé Bennett - Chef Hatchet and DJ
Sarah Gadon - Beth
Kristin Fairlie - Bridgette
Peter Oldring - Cody, Tyler, and Ezekiel
Emillie-Claire Barlow - Courtney
Drew Nelson - Duncan
Julia Chantrey - Eva
Dan Petronijevic - Geoff
Megan Fahlenbock - Gwen
Brian Froud - Harold
Rachel Wilson - Heather
Katie Crown - Izzy
Adam Reid - Justin
Stephanie Ann Mills - Lindsay and Katie
Novie Edwards - LeShawna
Carter Hayden - Noah
Lauren Lipson - Sadie
Scott McCord - Trent and Owen

See Also[edit]

Wikipedia has an article about:

External links[edit]