The Loud House (season 3)

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The Loud House (2016–present) is an American animated television series created by Chris Savino for Nickelodeon. The series revolves around the chaotic everyday life of an accident-prone boy named Lincoln Loud, who survives as the middle child and only son in a large family of 11 children.

Episode 1

Selfie Improvement [3.1a]

Lori: Ooh. My last post got 100 likes. New record. Look. [Shows Leni her post]

Leni: So cute! You've really found your best angle!

Lori: Thanks! Not to brag but I kind of feel like I've mastered the selfie.

Leni: Oh totes! Your pic almost got as many likes as Carol Pingrey's.

Lori: [Gasps and drops her phone] Ow! Carol Pingrey?! I didn't even know she was on this app!

Leni: She just joined! Can you believe her first selfie got 101 likes?

Lori: [Takes Leni's phone] Give me that! [Sees Carol's selfie] Ugh, typical. Perfect Carol Pingrey has to one-up me in everything I do.

[First flashback shows Younger Carol receiving a Bluebell Scout medal]

Leni: Don't feel bad, Lori. You sold almost as many cookies as Carol.

[Second flashback shows Carol beating Lori out for homecoming queen]

Leni: Oh, don't feel bad, Lori. You got almost as many votes as Carol!

[Third flashback shows Carol beating Lori in a golf tournament]

Leni: [Jumping up and down] Yay, Lori! You got way more points than Carol!

Lori: Thanks, Leni. But let me explain golf scoring. Again.

No Place Like Homeschool [3.1b]

Lincoln: It's our fault you didn't pass your test. We kept you up all night helping us study, that you were too tired to take your own test.

Lucy: We talked to Mom and Dad, and they agreed to give you a second chance.

Lynn: And this way we won't be here to distract you.

Lola: You're all willing to go back to regular school just for me? [her siblings nod] Thanks, you guys.

Episode 3

A Fridge too Far [3.3b]

Lincoln: Alright, which of you vultures swiped one of my mac 'n' cheese bites?

Episode 5

Fandom Pains [3.5a]

Lori: How excited are you for tonight's episode?

Leni: So excited! According to rumors on social media, Tristan's going to turn the dungeon into a gym. Tristan working out, can you even? [They sigh dreamily]

Lucy: [Groans] Let's hope this works Edwin. [goes over to Lori and Leni] Hey guys, now that we're all, um, ' VoM heads ', you have to join me in all of the super fun pre-show rituals.

Episode 6

Head Poet's Anxiety [3.6b]

Lincoln: Well, congratulations! Keep reaching for those dreams.

Luan: [Touched] Aw! Thanks! You're so supportive!

Lincoln: The more time she has, the less time she has to prank us.

Clyde: Ah. [Sits on a whoopie cushion and it deflates] Yeah she still has time.

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Lucy: This poem goes out to the person who got me here, my big sister Luan.

Dreams burnt to ash, hope tangled like laces,

Till love swept in, with puns and funny faces.

Where my path will lead, I can't be sure,

But if ever I'm lost, I'll look up to her.

[Luan smiles, touched]

Episode 7

Tripped! [3.7]

Loud family: [singing] It was one big family throw up [all glaring at Leni] From the egg salad gone wrong!

Episode 8

Friendzy [3.8b]

Lisa: By my calculations, with this many people in the house, we could be approaching a threat level of Stampeding T-Rex!

Friend 1: Hey, I was watching that!

Friend 2: Too bad!

Friend 3: No! Too bad for you!

Friend 4: Give me the remote, I wanna watch the sports channel!

Lisa: Uh-oh. Make that Erupting Volcano!

Episode 9

White Hare [3.9a]

Leni: Lincoln, you're perfect just the way you are!

Lori: You're kind.

Leni: You're fashionable.

Luna: You're rockin.

Luan: You're funny.

Lynn: You're tough.

Lucy: You're deep.

Lana and Lola: You're friendly.

Lisa: You're smart.

Lily: You Yincoln Youd.

Lori: Now give me that jacket and go out there and just be you!

Insta-Gran [3.9b]

Loud siblings: Happy birthday, Gran-Gran!

Myrtle: Did you hear that, Al? They called me Gran-Gran! Oh, thank you, everyone.

Episode 10

Shop Girl [3.10b]

Leni: She wasn't really me. I'm sorry, you guys. It did feel good to get what I wanted, but it felt even better to give other people what they wanted.

Episode 16

Missed Connection [3.16b]

Rita: Oh, your dad and I had to be apart for a month while he had mono.

Lynn Sr.: Those ding-dang karaoke mics were just dripping with germs.

Episode 17

Sitting Bull [3.17a]

Lori: Hey, are either of you guys free for a babysitting job tonight? Mrs. McCauley just called and I can't do it, I'm sitting for the Dumscums.

Luna: Sorry, dude. I got the Katzes tonight. I'm gonna teach Jamie and Sydney how to do a drum circle.

Luan: I'm sitting for the Santinis. I've got some great comedy props in case little Mary gets a ouchie. [hits herself with a toy mallet and faints]

Leni: Thanks, Luan, that makes me feel much better about my ouchie.

The Spies Who Loved Me [3.17b]

Frida: Downtown? At her age?

Carlos: Is she crazy?

Hector: We tried to talk her out of it but you know how she is, stubborn like an ox.

Episode 19

Jeers for Fears [3.19a]

Richie: I hear the screams are so loud, you can't even hear yourself scream.

Trent: I hear it's so scary, they give you diapers before you go in.

Chandler: I hear a deranged clown chases you with barbecue tongs.

Lincoln: What're you guys talking about?

Richie: The Royal Woods House of Terror just opened up for the season and we're finally old enough to go.

Tea Tale Heart [3.19b]

Lola: That should do it. [sees Lincoln and quickly hides the doll] Lincoln, hello! Lovely weather we're having...! [smiles nervously]

Lincoln: Uh, yeah, I guess. Hey, have you seen my glue?

Lola: [sees the glue is in her room] Pssh, why would I have? What do you think, I go around swiping people's glue?!

Lincoln: You don't have to get mad about it.

The Loudest Thanksgiving (Episode 20)

Lori: OMG, Boo-Boo Bear, I am so excited for turkey day.

Bobby: Me too. We haven't spent it with the Casagrandes in like five years. When we lived in Royal Woods, Mom always had to work the Thanksgiving shift at the hospital.

[Flashback to Bobby and Ronnie Anne eating their meals at the hospital glumly. Maria approaches them with what appears to be blood on her body, and they scream]

Maria: Oh, this is just cranberry sauce. I tripped on the way over.

[End flashback]

Bobby: It wasn't great, but I was always up to date on my booster shots.

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Frida: Control your children! It is not safe to have Thanksgiving in this house!

Rita: Well, if you don't like it, you're welcome to leave! Not you, Bobby, you can stay.

Frida: That's what you want, isn't it? To steal our precious Roberto away from us!

Lynn Sr.: Oh, oh, like you haven't been trying to steal Lori from us! Well guess what, BUCKO, it's not gonna happen!

Lori: Guys, guys, please stop!

Louds and Casagrandes: STAY OUT OF THIS!

Rosa: Why would anybody want to spend Thanksgiving here gnawing on your dry bird?

[Lynn Sr. cries]

Rita: The turgooseon is delicious. Maybe the problem is your lumpy gravy!

Gravybot: Did someone say gravy?

Rosa: [bumps Gravybot into the wall] No. They don't deserve it.

Gravybot: AAH. SYSTEM MALFUNCTION! MALFUNCTION! [squirts gravy all over Frida's painting]

Frida: [gasps] My painting!

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Lori: I'm sorry, Boo-Boo Bear, I know you were looking forward to having a real Thanksgiving this year.

Bobby: It's not all bad. I found this half-off turkey jerky.

[Both families run inside the gas station, trampling Flip]

Flip: Jumping jerky! Holy hot dogs!

Bobby: Whoa, how did you guys find us?

Carlos and Lisa: Tracking devices. [both look at each other]

Lynn Sr.: You left before trying my twice-baked tart.

Rosa: They would prefer my flan.

Lynn Sr.: Flan, shman. Tart, tart, tart!

Bobby: Stop! Don't you guys see? This is why we left. We couldn't stand the fighting and competing.

Lori: We don't want to choose sides. So maybe from now on, we should just spend Thanksgiving by ourselves.

[The Louds and Casagrandes all feel guilty]

Rosa: Well, nobody wants that.

Lynn Sr.: We certainly don't.

Maria: Lori, Bobby, I'm sorry we've been acting so childishly.

Rita: We're sorry too, it's just so hard to let go of your kids. [to the Casagrandes] You know what? You should get Lori and Bobby for Thanksgiving.

Hector: Well, goodness knows we haven't done anything to deserve that. They should spend it with you.

Flip: Hey, I got an idea. Why don't you just rotate every year, huh? Much like the juicy hot dogs I'm selling at a mere 40% markup. Holiday discount.

Bobby: Works for us.

[They all agree and engage in a big group hug.]

LJ: I'm glad we figured out future years, but what about right now? I'm starving!

Bobby: Well, we've got hot dogs and sunflower seeds and 20 kinds of artisanal jerky. Maybe we could throw a dinner together here.

Lynn Sr.: I'm game.

Rosa: Me too.

Frida: We could make this place look festive. I think I have some leftover decorations in the car.

Rita: I'll help you.

Cooked (Episode 24)

Lincoln: Hey Dad, I've got an idea, why don't you let us take care of the promoting? I'm sure we can come up with something.

Lola: Yeah! We can help Daddy!

Luan: Of course, I'd be gland to do it.

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Lori: Well, I'm done with you guys being in my room!

Lola: Well, I'm done with looking at your FACE, Lori!

[The sisters angrily go back to their rooms]

Lincoln: Guys, wait! What are we gonna do for the grand opening?

Episode 25

Stage Plight [3.25a]

Luan: Shh! That's Benny, the boy I've been telling you about.