SpongeBob SquarePants/Season 8
- Seasons: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 | Movies: The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie / Sponge Out of Water / Sponge on the Run | Main
SpongeBob SquarePants (1999-) is an animated TV series, airing on Nickelodeon about the adventures and endeavors of the title character and his various friends in the fictional underwater city of Bikini Bottom. It spawned a movie, followed by several short films, and video games.
Accidents Will Happen (1.1)
The Other Patty (1.2)
Drive Thru (2.1)
- Squidward: [His left ear is shown pounding due to the pain inflicted; he is shown sweating. He holds his ear as he cries a bit] Owwwww! I'm not faking you know. It really hurt... a lot.
[Bubble transition to Mr. Krabs and Squidward in the kitchen; Mr. Krabs is shown sitting at his office desk; Squidward's ear is now bandaged]
- Mr. Krabs: [holding a bill from Squidward] A bill?! And what is this for?
- Squidward: [points to his bandaged ear] It's for my ear-replacement surgery! We need a real microphone and speaker!
- Mr. Krabs: Do you have any idea how much a real microphone and speaker cost?!
- Squidward: How much?
- Mr. Krabs: Well... they cost as much as... as uh... as a... real microphone and... speaker.
- Plankton: Chum Nuggets… Get it before… [his left arm fall apart] …My arm falls off.
The Hot Shot (2.2)
A Friendly Game (3.1)
Sentimental Sponge (3.2)
Frozen Face-Off (Episode 4)
Squidward's School for Grown-Ups (5.1)
- SpongeBob: [showing off a "fancy" outfit that he is wearing] So, umm...what do you guys think? Sweet duds, huh, Patrick?
- Patrick: Ha ha, sure are! [Squidward clears his throat] ...for a baby.
- Squidward: Well played, Patrick! Well played...
- SpongeBob: Beard! I must remove that beard!
- Patrick: Hey! Stop that beard!
- SpongeBob: Patrick! That's not a beard! It's a sea urchin!
- Squidward: That's what I thought you... [gets a tomato tossed right in his face] No, no! I didn't mean it like that! I meant... [gets bombarded with even more fruit]
Oral Report (5.2)
- SpongeBob: Patrick, you're kinda derailing the proceedings here. Just focus on me, huh?
- Patrick: Alright, alright. [stares at SpongeBob with bloodshot eyes]
- SpongeBob: Patrick, nobody throws pillows in class!
- Patrick: Says you! SPEECH!
- Patrick: Try again.
- SpongeBob: [panting] Boating...safety...
(Patrick crashes together a pair of cymbals, causing SpongeBob to lose his balance and fall off the treadmill while still holding the handlebars)
- Patrick: Come on, SquarePants. Is this the best you can do?
- SpongeBob: Patrick, I don't think this is working.
(The treadmill's motion grinds SpongeBob into a pile of dust on the floor)
- Patrick: [shouts] SPEECH!!! [startled, SpongeBob jumps up in his normal form. Patrick continues yelling the same word repeatedly, making SpongeBob even more nervous] SPEECH!! SPEECH!! SPEECH!! SPEECH!! SPEECH!! SPEECH!! [his eyes are now talking] SPEECH!! SPEECH!! SPEECH!! SPEECH!! SPEECH!! SPEE--
- SpongeBob: Patrick, stop! Somehow, you're help just isn't helping. I am even more nervous about this oral report than I've ever been about anything. [shivers]
Sweet and Sour Squid (6.1)
The Googly Artiste (6.2)
SpongeBob's Runaway Roadtrip (Episodes 7–9)
A SquarePants Family Vacation (Episode 7)
Patrick's Staycation (8.1)
- Squidward: Patrick, you dimwitted moron, GET OUT OF MY KITCHEN!!!
- Patrick: Good idea. I think I'll head over to the spa. [bones crack] I could use a massage.
- Squidward: Get this into your tiny, tiny, little, tiny brain—this is not a resort. It's my house. There is no spa. And you can't get A MASSAGE!!!
Walking the Plankton (8.2)
Mr. Krabs Takes a Vacation (9.2)
Ghoul Fools (Episode 10)
Mermaid Man Begins (XI.I)
- Mermaid Man: [slaps forehead] The story. Yes. [a new flashback begins, very similar to the first one] I was a young, handsome muscular lad, soaking up the sun's rays on the beach, when suddenly I became drowsy. [Mermaid Man in the flashback falls asleep instantly] A wave came ashore and drew me back into the ocean!
- Young Mermaid Man: Help! [coughing]
- Mermaid Man: [narrating] Suddenly, I realized I was being sucked under by a violent whirlpool! I was running out of oxygen fast. [sinks to the bottom of the sea and gives up trying the struggle] But before I drowned, I was rescued by mermaids. [carried through the ocean by 2 mermaids] They took me to the ocean floor, where they gave me a magic sea star that allowed me to breathe underwater. [Mermaid Man in the past inhales and exhales deeply, then falls asleep, the present Mermaid Man falls asleep also]
- Barnacle Boy: Wake up, you old coot.
- Mermaid Man: [wakes up after being nudged by Barnacle Boy] Huh?
- Barnacle Boy: Finish the story.
- SpongeBob: [excitedly] Yeah, Mermaid Man. What about Barnacle Boy?
- Patrick: Yeah, how'd you 2 meet?
- Mermaid Man: [slapping his temples] Oh. Sorry, boys. There I was in the ocean, the only human who could breathe underwater. [flashback resumes] Alas, such a life got lonely real fast, I had no other humans to talk to. What was a man to do? Then my question was answered. [the bottom of a boat is seen in the flashback, then the port side of the boat is shown, where a very young Barnacle Boy is scraping barnacles off the wood. The captain of the boat appears]
- Captain: Hey, Barnacle Boy. Make sure you scrape the barnacles underneath, too.
- Young Barnacle Boy: Aye, aye. [takes a deep breath and lowers himself underwater to get the barnacles under the surface]
- Young Mermaid Man: A boy in trouble! I've got to act fast or he'll drown. [swims to Barnacle Boy] Fear not, young man, I'll take care of this.
- Mermaid Man: [narrating once again] I used my new telekinetic powers to draw barnacles into Barnacle Boy's body, where they took the place of his lungs so he could breathe underwater, too. [Young Barnacle Boy inhales] It was at that moment when we decided to team up.
- SpongeBob: [the flashback has ended] Ohhh, so that's how you guys got together.
- Barnacle Boy: No, no, no. [shaking head and crossing arms] The reason I teamed up with this joker is because... I was stuck breathing underwater for the rest of my life.
- Mermaid Man: Oh... yeah. ([to Barnacle Boy] Sorry about that.)
- Barnacle Boy: (No hard feelings.) [to SpongeBob and Patrick] Anyway, from that day forward, we became…
- Johnny: ...Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy, superhero crime fighters!
- Young Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy: [new flashback begins, an alarm is clanging while people are shouting] A crime in progress! [A bank robber laughs maniacally as he is stealing bags of cash from the First Nautical Bank]
- Banker: Stop, thief!
- Young Barnacle Boy: See if you think this is funny, evildoer. [He rapidly spits barnacles at the robber, knocking him down] Who's laughing now, thieving scum?
- Banker: [shaking Mermaid Man's hand] Thank you, sir and to whom do I owe this debt of gratitude?
- Young Mermaid Man: You can thank me, Mermaid Man. [Barnacle Boy's seen shaking in indignity in the background]
- Man Ray: [new flashback begins, Man Ray has the upper hand in a duel against Barnacle Boy. He laughs] You're mine!
- Young Barnacle Boy: [shoots web a web of cheese-like material that binds and gags Man Ray] How'd you like to taste my tentacle zapper, Man Ray?
- Young Mermaid Man: [dialing a pay phone] Hello? [indistinct response] So, what are you wearing? [indistinct response] Oh. In that case, can I get a large pepperoni pizza, extra cheese? Thanks. [Barnacle Boy slaps his head in disgust]
- [The origin special plays.]
- Narrator: The story of Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy all started here.
- Tim: Come on, Ernie! The movie's about to start... Where's the popcorn?
- Ernie: It's in the microwave, Tim.
- Narrator: At that very moment in the apartment directly above, a rogue scientist doing tests on radioactive ants knocks over a jar of his infected specimens, one of which, without any hesitation, crawls down one floor and miraculously lands undetected. It viciously bites our soon-to-be superhero. He screams in pain...!
- Ernie: Ahh!
- Narrator: ...Stumbling backwards!
- Tim: What on earth?
- Narrator: In a split-second, both men find themselves in a freefall that sends them squarely through the roof of a vats of acid factory, and into a vat of acid that is tipped over by an errant alien spaceship, carrying the 2 blindly on a wave of acid during a solar eclipse on a leap year (February 29), precariously careening onto a bomb-testing site, where a cataclysmic explosion exposes our heroes in waiting to highly toxic radium gases. Then, as fate would have it, magical storm clouds move in, zapping both men with a neon-plaid lightning bolt and raining radioactive ooze, which, through centrifugal and electromagnetic turbulence, causes a powerful earthquake deep in the jungle 2,000 miles away, consequently unearthing a magical crystal with wings that flies to Ernie and Tim's exact location, and powered by super gamma energy currents, pilots them to open skies until, not paying attention, the crystal clips the top of a billboard, flinging the two back to their apartment miraculously unharmed, when...
- Ernie: Hey, the popcorn's ready!
- Johnny: ...They proceed with movie night, and eat slightly overcooked popcorn.
- Tim: Mmmm... I think you overcooked this a little.
- Johnny: Suddenly, an amazing reaction to the overcooked popcorn hits them with a jolt of cosmic super energy, metamorphosing Ernie into an incredibly strong, seastar-wearing superhero and Tim into a slightly less strong, but also super sailor-looking guy.
- Tim (Barnacle Boy): I have the sudden and incredibly urge to breathe water instead of air.
- Ernie (Mermaid Man): As do I.
- Narrator: And that is how they became the superheroes we have come to know as... Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy - Defenders of the Deep!
Plankton's Good Eye (11.2)
- Plankton: [eye appears] Success! [another eye grows] Uh oh, that ain't good. [even more eyes grow] No, no, no, no no no nо nо nо no! I can see everyth- [an eye grows inside of him and pops out of his mouth]
Barnacle Face (12.1)
- SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs, what is this thing?
- Mr. Krabs: Why, it's my old soap press!
- SpongeBob: Soap press?
- Mr. Krabs: That's right! All the soap Pearl and I use comes from this machine. And the best part is, it runs on 100% pure leftover Krabby Patties!
- SpongeBob: Leftover Krabby Patties?
- Mr. Krabs: [tosses a Krabby Patty into the machine] Their precious essences are harvested, and after a brief cooling process, tumble out this conveyor belt as fresh, wonderful bars of soap! [the new soap falls off the conveyor belt into a basket] Fresh and invigorating! Plus, it's absolutely free.
- SpongeBob: [picks up one of the soap bars and sniffs it] Ohhhh, that explains why it smells so familiar! I don't know about this, Mr. Krabs. If Pearl finds out that you...
- Pearl: [lividly] I've been using soap made out of Krabby Patties?!?!
- Mr. Krabs: Krabby Patty essence.
- Pearl: That's grease!
- Mr. Krabs: Well, if you want to split hairs, I suppose-
- Pearl: [furiously] DADDY! [throws soap at her father]
- Mr. Krabs: [runs away in fear] Got to go, you kids have fun!
Pet Sitter Pat (12.2)
House Sittin' for Sandy (13.1)
Smoothe Jazz at Bikini Bottom (13.2)
Bubble Troubles (14.1)
The Way of the Sponge (14.2)
- Fuzzy Acorns: Congratulations, Sandy. You've managed to put your opponent to sleep in under 1 minute. [lifts his finger, touches the wood, causing it to collapse, and waking Spongebob up] Too bad your opponent didn't put up a fight. I was prepared to give you the lowest of belts: a clear belt. But now I realized, you're unfit to wear a belt of any kind INCLUDING THE ONE THAT HOLDS UP YOUR PANTS! [snatches off Spongebob's belt, causing his pants to fall off]
- Sandy: Don't be disappointed, Spongebob. A belt isn't the most important thing in karate.
- Spongebob: [depressed] Easy for you to say, Sandy. Your pants aren't down around your ankles.
- Fuzzy Acorns: And I'm revoking your black belt. [snatches Sandy's black belt right off]
- Sandy: Hey. You can't do that.
- Fuzzy Acorns: Oh yes, I can, for wasting my time, bringing me this SORRY EXCUSE FOR A STUDENT! Stick to something you're good at, son.
- Spongebob: Yes, sensei. [walks out of Sandy's house, while also having trouble staying up]
- Sandy: That was pretty lowdown, Fuzzy. The way you humiliated my friend.
- Fuzzy Acorns: The sponge one will never earn his belt.
- Sandy: I know Spongebob will impress you if you give him one more chance.
- Fuzzy Acorns: Silence. No more chances. Sensei never gives two chances. If you really want to impress me, show me where I can get a decent meal around here. Lunchtime approaches.
- Sandy: That's it! [excited] I'll take him to the Krusty Krab and then, he might just find himself impressed by a certain sandwich maker.
- Fuzzy Acorns: Who are you talking to?
The Krabby Patty That Ate Bikini Bottom (15.1)
Bubble Buddy Returns (15.2)
Restraining SpongeBob (16.1)
Are You Happy Now? (17.1)
Planet of the Jellyfish (17.2)
Free Samples (18.1)
Home Sweet Rubble (18.2)
Karen 2.0 (19.1)
Face Freezeǃ (20.1)
Glove World R.I.P. (20.2)
- SpongeBob: [bursts into Mr. Krabs’ office] MR. KRABS!!!
- Mr. Krabs: Neptune's Knee-highs, lad! How many times do I have to remind you to knock?!
- SpongeBob: [knocking, emphasizing each syllable] MIS...TER...KRABS.
Demolition Doofus (21.2)
- Captain Lutefisk: Welcome to the Bikini Bottom Demolition Derby! Allow me to introduce our contestants! [Camera switches to a giant, muscular purple in a shark-like boat] First off, bane to crossing guards everywhere: The Kruncher! [Crowd cheers for The Kruncher] And from the darkest depths of the briney blue: Diving Bell Dan! [Diving Bell Dan pounds his chest] And of course, you know and admire: Blow Torch! [Blow Torch breathes out fire] And the funniest driver of all: The Cackling Cruiser! (The Cackling Crusier laughs) Now with introductions out of the way...[Notices SpongeBob drive up between the Kruncher and Blow Torch]...Oh! I almost forgot! (Laughs) The Squish!
- Captain Lutefisk: Oh! Ooh! Le Squish turns it around with a rare face-tread maneuver!
- Mrs. Puff: Why... are you still... ALIVE?!?!
- SpongeBob: Put it in drive?! Thanks Mrs. Puff, You're the best!
- Factory Worker: We're closed! Do I have to spell it out for you? C-S-L-O-S-Z-E-D. Cuh-losed! Not only that, but the very last box of Snail Bites shipped out days ago! They were such a hit they flew out of the stores and now, we've run out of ingredients! From what I hear, the owner even dropped out of the snail food business entirely! Yeah and why wouldn't he, huh? He's made his money!
- SpongeBob: You see, Gary? There are no more--
- Factory Worker: I mean, it's not like I would do the same thing if I were in his shoes!
- SpongeBob: So, you see, Gary, there...
- Factory Worker: Why would anybody go out punishing themselves, just for the sake of the happiness of a few pets or...
- SpongeBob: Would you mind being quiet for one second, please!
- Factory Worker: Sorry.
For Here or to Go (22.2)
- Plankton: Karen, quick! You gotta cut this Krabby Patty out of me, stat!
- Karen: But what about anesthetic?
- Plankton: There's no time! I can feel it digesting!
[Karen lifts her arm revealing that there is a saw attachment.]
- Karen: Whatever you say, dear. Hold still. [The exterior of the Chum Bucket is shown] This may pinch a little.
[Plankton screams. The scene changes to shown SpongeBob looking out a Krusty Krab window at the Chum Bucket with a sign and a line of customers.]
- This Christmas special is focused on SpongeBob and Plankton.
- SpongeBob: Hi, Squidward. What are you doing today?
- Squidward: Stringing lights so Santa knows, in no uncertain terms... [turns on lights reading "GO AWAY"] ...To "GO AWAY"!
- SpongeBob: Okayy...
- SpongeBob: Ooh, what's that?
- Patrick: It's a trap! A trap for Santa!
- SpongeBob: Ooh, baited with Christmas treats?
- Patrick: [singing, to the "Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy" tune] I will trap Santa in my box, locked up like Fort Knox and make him stop the clocks, and then we'll have Christmas all... year... looo-ooo-ong! [sees the cookie meant as bait] Hey, a cookie! [gets trapped by himself, anyway, as a result]
- SpongeBob: Ahoy, everybody! [clicks his fingers and mistletoe appears over the heads of the two fish he fed Plankton's fruitcake to, curing them of jerktonium poisoning. He clicks again and a pile of presents appears, curing two other fish. A little boy begins to play Christmas baubles like bells] [singing] Bring joy to the world, it's the thing to do, but the world does not revolve around you.
Don't be a jerk.
It's Christmas! [Throws a snowball at Mr Krabs and cures him]
Be nice to babies and animals.
Old folks, too.
'Cause that's how you'd like them to treat you!
Use turn signals.
Don't screen my calls.
Don't you wreck the house when you deck the halls.
Spit your gum where it won't wind up on my shoe.
Squeeze toothpaste from the bottom of the tube.
Don't be a jerk.
It's Christmas! It's Christmas! [hands a gift to Pearl, who continues to pass it down a line, curing people as they receive it, except for Squidward, who is unaffected]
When others are talking, never interrupt.
Don't put people down or leave the toilet seat up.
'Tis the season to be jolly, not jerky!
- SpongeBob's Friends and Co.: [in background chorus' voices] Jolly, not jerky!
- SpongeBob: Santa brought nearly every gift on your list.
Why whine about the 1 that he missed?
Don't be a jerk!
- SpongeBob's Friends and Co.: [in background chorus' voices] Don't be a jerk.
- SpongeBob: It's Christmas! It's Christmas!
Don't be a jerk.
- SpongeBob's Friends and Co.: [in background chorus' voices] Don't be a jerk.
- SpongeBob: It's Christmas! It's Christmas!
Super Evil Aquatic Villain Team Up is Go! (XXIV.I)
Chum Fricassee (24.2)
- Plankton: My restaurant! [cries]
- Squidward: My fanbase! [cries harder before his paternal grandmother appears.]
- Grandma Tentacles: I hope you learned your lesson, genius! [crushes Squidward's foot with her walker for the third time]
- Squidward: Ow!
The Good Krabby Name (25.1)
Move It or Lose It (25.2)
Hello Bikini Bottom! (Episode 26)
- Squidward: [to SpongeBob] The day I willingly practice my musical art with you is the day I grow hair on my...
- Squidward: This is our worst gig yet! Children's parties! Well, if this is the way this tour is being organized, then I would like to– OOOOOOOOOOOOWWWW!!! [turns around and finds that a child has pinned a tail onto his behind] I am not a donkey fish!